Dartegnian's Mood Calendar

That Wraps 2025!

Wed, 31 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: BGC High Street

2025 ended with me spending time with the people I care about. I started this day by mostly accompanying someone throughout their work and they even were still playing Assassin's Creed: Odyssey. We continued calling and we watched a few scary videos on YouTube here and there, but things were otherwise pretty chill between us. Around 6-7 a.m. again, we sort of passed out and we eventually both left the call at around 7. For the morning, nothing much happened and I just slept for 4 hours. I eventually woke up in the afternoon and we got ready to go to Samgyupsalamat BGC. We took a while to get ready but we eventually got a ride there. Once we got there, we found out that the restaurant was closed for today! This feels like Christmas Eve all over again. So we walked to One Bonifacio High Street instead so we can try out Ramen Nagi or Soban K-Town. When we got there, we found out that both restaurants were closed! So we just ate at the Mary Grace inside the mall, which was thankfully still open. I ordered my usual beef *salpicao* and my family got a lot of food. We mostly just talked and took a few pictures, and I paid the bill. I used my Google Pixel 9 to pay and it was cool to see Google Wallet worked. After eating, we walked around for a bit as we intended to stay here up until midnight to watch the New Year's Eve countdown. We got some coffee at Starbucks and, at first, the cashier was a little weirded out because my Starbucks card was linked to my Apple Wallet, but they just scanned it and it worked anyway. We had some coffee and we sat down for a bit, changing seats every now and again but we ultimately settled on a spot near 5th Street where the event was being held. We watched a few performances, but I couldn't hear them very well. I kind of got bored so I mostly looked up if I can switch to Apple Music, but eventually gave up on it. Right around the countdown, we moved closer to the stage and it was PACKED with people. I was kind of worried that a stampede might happen or that our phones would get stolen, but the countdown to 2026 eventually started and eventually 2026 rolled around. Today was kind of like an encapsulation of 2025, minus my life working. It was stressful, tiring, but all in all, I enjoyed it because the people and my experiences with them made this year worth it.

Song of the day: You'll Be In My Heart by NIKI

Lyrics that resonated with me:
'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart
Always

Journal entry for Tuesday, December 30th, 2025

Tue, 30 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday had me accompanying someone throughout most of their entire night shift and nothing much happened aside from me playing a few videos in the background. At around 6 a.m., they slept and I was just browsing Instagram in the background. They eventually woke up at around 7 a.m. and asked if I was still awake, but then had to bid goodbye to me and then they left the call. It was pretty weird, but I didn't care much since I wanted to sleep anyway. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened but we got into another call in the late evening. They showed off their Mini Brands and the books they got, which was cute, and the night continued from there on out.

Song of the day: Stars by fun.

Journal entry for Monday, December 29th, 2025

Mon, 29 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday had me accompanying someone for a few hours but they eventually fell asleep during our call and I disconnected us from the call so we could get some sleep. Nothing much happened throughout the day aside from me sleeping as much as I could. In the evening, I finished my playthrough of Five Hearts Under One Roof while someone watched it in our Discord server. I had to get the Mal-sook ending because we both liked her of the bunch and I enjoyed playing the game. Someone then played Assassin's Creed: Origins while on call and we eventually left the call around late evening to re-call later as I planned to accompany them for the entire evening.

Journal entry for Sunday, December 28th, 2025

Sun, 28 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: SMX Convention Center

I got 9 hours of rest today and I must've been pretty sleepy because I woke up at around 1 p.m. in the afternoon. I eventually talked to Nathan and he said he'd come pick me up. We eventually met up and he drove us to SMX Convention Center on his motorcycle. Thankfully, he prepared our ticket for us and he made me take a few photos with some cosplayers, mainly Peak cosplayers, which was pretty cute. Nathan also got into cosplay and dressed as Nathan Drake from Uncharted. We entered SMX and we just tried to browse and buy as much stuff as we could. Money was a little tight on me, so I didn't buy much. But I didn't even see a lot of stuff to buy anyway, and I didn't like any shirt or jacket enough for me to justify buying it. I did buy a “REPO baby” because it was so cute. I bought a lot of stuff for my sister and that's where most of my money went to. I also treated Nathan to some food and we ate for a bit. For the rest of the con, we mostly just bought stuff and Nathan told me about this new girl that he was seeing. He mostly asked for advice and I was okay with just listening and giving him advice whenever he asked. He took his damn time browsing the shops because it was already closing time and he was still not done buying. In the end, he didn't buy anything Warhammer-related and we just went to SM MoA to get some 8cuts and then he dropped me home. All in all, today was pretty nice and I got a lot of exercise in, which is always good. In the evening, I eventually went home and got into a call with someone that lasted through the early morning or something.

Journal entry for Saturday, December 27th, 2025

Sat, 27 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

December 27 had me getting some good rest and I went downstairs to the breakfast buffet. The buffet here was nice, but it wasn't comparable to the one at Dusit Thani or City Garden GRAND Hotel. I liked it, for what it was, but I didn't overeat or anything. I then got ready and enjoyed whatever's left of my time here before checking out. I tried to get a car ride to Dusit Thani, but some weird driver kept cancelling so I just decided to hike it instead. It was a long walk, but I was able to enjoy it and I got to get some steps in for today. Nothing much happened after that, we went back home and unpacked all of our stuff. In the evening, I had planned to meet with my new Ukranian/Russian friend and we planned to meet at Starbucks on 32nd Street. We eventually met up, talked, and I helped them set up their website and handles most of the cost that came with the initial setup. We eventually had to walk so that they could meet their friend at this bar and we stopped over Burger King and treated them for dinner. She was nice, we talked about the differences between living in the Philippines vs Russia, how their kids were, and other plans that they have in the future. It was nice to have a really laid-back conversation and I eventually had to drop them off to their friend and I had to go home. I just rested and Nathan invited me to a convention tomorrow.

Song of the day: Billyeoon Goyangi (Do the Dance) by ILLIT

Surprise Stay!

Fri, 26 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: I'M Hotel

For the day after Christmas, I started it by being woken up from my sleep last night because I was snoring so heavily. They meant well but I really couldn't sleep after that and I know how hard it is for me to get some sleep. I spent the entire night staying up and just watching IG Reels. We were able to have breakfast at The Pantry and it was nice to eat there, for what it's worth. We didn't have anything planned for today so my sister decided that we go to this Korean spa nearby instead, it was this *jjimjilbang* not too far from here. I was still really tired from barely sleeping 2 hours and I wasn't able to enjoy it fully because I had a bit of paranoia over my items being stolen and stuff, even though it was completely safe in the end. We enjoyed the rooms and I made the most out of the time, for what it's worth. We enjoyed our time there before I had to book for another hotel room because I couldn't get some sleep at our current place and I didn't want to bother them. We eventually headed back to Dusit Thani and I packed my bag to prepare for my other hotel room stay. I stayed on my own at another hotel nearby which was I'M Hotel. The name was pretty weird, but I let it slide since the facilities seemed nice. I got a lot of freebies but I didn't really get any of them for fear of overspending, when I've already overspent today. The room I got was really, really nice. It was honestly the **nicest** room I've ever stayed at, so far. I think it even beats my stay at Ardenhills because of how luxurious and spacious the room feels. The ceiling was so high and the room had such a great view of the city and of Poblacion. I slept after that and got whatever rest I could before I woke up in the evening. My Mom and sister planned to have dinner at Italianni's in Glorietta and I had to walk all the way from my hotel to Glorietta, which was actually a welcomed surprise. We ate dinner together, we played some games at the newly-renovated Timezone near the movie theaters, and my sister and I generally had fun. We had Starbucks for a bit before we went back to our respective hotel rooms. I had a long walk back, but I enjoyed it because I played the album Some Nights which made me take a look into things because I still resonate with the songs, even though I last felt so attached to them 6 years ago. In the end, I took a few pics of me just chilling in the hotel room and enjoying the king-sized bed before finally going to sleep.

Song of the day: Year 3000 by Busted

Christmas Day 2025!

Thu, 25 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Dusit Thani, Greenbelt Chapel

On Christmas day, we started it by eating at the breakfast buffet downstairs. The Pantry restaurant was already full so we made our way to this grand ballroom to eat. We had a lot of food for our breakfast but I noticed that the buffet at City Garden GRAND Hotel had more food, but it was fine and I just brushed it off. We had a lot of food and I was able to indulge in some cereal and several meats. A showing of Up (2009) was playing in the background that my sister watched, which was cool. I took a few photos and we also took a few photos before we all ate and then went upstairs to get ready because we planned to attend Christmas Mass. We all got ready and we all walked to Greenbelt and took a few pics along the way. We were kinda late for mass, but it was nice that we still got to attend and the priest greeted us a merry Christmas, so that was nice. We walked around for a bit more after that, took a few pics here and there. We then went to this Starbucks and we just drank coffee and chilled for a while. I also sent out money to someone and Luan as a *pamasko* and it was nice to send them something for Christmas. We bought a few more things and walked around Landmark before ultimately going back to our room in Dusit Thani. For the rest of the evening, nothing much happened aside from us getting dinner at Manam. We ate a lot of food there and I covered our expenses. We then walked back after our meal because we were so full. All in all, Christmas day was fun and eventful, and it was still really nice to walk around Makati with everything being so near.

Our Stay at a 5-Star Hotel!

Wed, 24 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Dusit Thani

Christmas Eve started with me staying on call with someone. They mostly just worked and I just watched them play Assassin's Creed: Odyssey. In the background, I was troubleshooting why one of the games I bought didn't work. But eventually our call ended and we got started on preparing our stuff before we leave for Dusit Thani in a bit. My sister and I spent most of the afternoon just preparing our stuff for later. Around 2 p.m. or so, we booked a ride to Dusit Thani. Check-in was actually pretty quick were it not for the long line that was held up by strange people who wanted to get special rooms. But since we had everything neatly lined up, our check-in was fairly quick and generally hassle-free. We went up to the room and immediately had to set everything up. I had a bit of a hard time setting up the Apple TV box, but once that was done, we were listening to Christmas movies and Christmas songs. Around 6 p.m. or so, instead of attending Christmas Eve Mass, we instead went to NAIA to pick up Mom. We noticed that her flight was close to arriving so we booked a ride to NAIA Terminal 1 to pick her up. My sister and I book separate rides to get to NAIA and my sister gets there first, while I take a while and have to add a big tip just to get there. Also, for some weird reason, the biker's helmet smelled like puke. But whatever, we eventually get to the terminal and wait a while for our Mom to arrive. We meet up with her shortly and we book a ride directly back to Dusit Thani so we can enjoy our vacation. We quickly found a ride and the rider was pretty helpful with our stuff. We eventually got to unpack Mom's stuff in the hotel room and we got dressed and ready for our dinner. We walked around for a bit and we even walked until Greenbelt only to find that there isn't a single store open right now. We found out that they had all mostly closed by 7 p.m. and this place looked like a ghost town, even though it was only 10 p.m. My sister felt so tired and almost like she was passing out. So we just hightail it back to our hotel room. We passed by a Lawson on our way back and we ate for a bit there, which was nice. We eventually made our way back to our hotel room and we were able to order food from Filling Station. We ate for a while and then Mom watched a new episode of her Netflix show. We take a few pictures before we called it a day.

Song of the day: Last Christmas by Wham!

Escaped the Backrooms!

Tue, 23 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: The Backrooms

December 23 was here and tomorrow would be the time Mom would come home and we'd spend Christmas with her at Dusit Thani. But for now, I started the day off by spending it in a call with someone. They played Assassin's Creed: Odyssey and I downloaded that new game. After that, time mostly passed and in the evening we played Escape the Backrooms together with Luan and someone for one last time. We continued the playthrough we had before and pushed through several stages and got to the ending. We initially got the Wrong Door Ending, but after Luan pulled up the charts to get to the different endings, we continued to push through them so that we could fully finish this game today. We got the other endings like the Empty City ending, and around The Suburbs ending I was playing Christmas music because I was in an extremely festive mood. I just kept playing Christmas songs non-stop because I was so hyped for Christmas Eve tomorrow! We kept playing and I played a crucial role in The Pink House ending where I was the last one alive, and I played Christmas songs until the ending tape played. We got the last ending of the game and that's where we all truly left off for the evening. As usual, I had that call with someone and we continued our call until the next day.

Song of the day: Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! by Dean Martin

Journal entry for Monday, December 22nd, 2025

Mon, 22 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Makati

Monday started with me continuing my stay at City Garden GRAND Hotel. I just got rest and eventually got the well-needed rest since I haven't gotten proper rest in a while. For the morning, I ate at the breakfast buffet downstairs since my stay came with breakfast included. It was honestly THE BEST breakfast buffet I've ever had. They had so much food options on the table and I was honestly able to enjoy a lot of the options. But it was still so much that I wasn't able to try them all. I did enjoy my omelette and it was probably the best omelette I've had due to how spicy and stuffed it was. I thoroughly enjoyed my breakfast and looked over the hotel across the street, I'M Hotel, for a future hotel stay. I eventually booked a ride home and took a few photos before leaving. Nothing much happened after that and I just passed time randomly through the afternoon. In the evening, I played Lethal Company with someone and Luan, and it was our first time trying it out with a few mods. It was so much fun and we progressed a lot through the entire evening. After that, I mostly just learned how to add passes to Apple Wallet and made custom passes of the stuff I have and the events I've been to. It was really fun and I enjoyed making passes, for what it's worth. I had a call with some after that that continued to the next day.

Song of the day: Never Gonna Leave This Bed by Maroon 5

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Wake you up
In the middle of the night to say
I will never walk away again
I'm never gonna leave this bed, oh

Hotel Extended Mini-Stay!

Sun, 21 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Makati

Sunday still had me staying up and enjoying my suite at the hotel. For the rest of my time there, I was just on my Mac and I eventually ended up barely sleeping despite how comfortable the bed and living space was. I eventually had breakfast and it was a super small breakfast buffet, which wasn't that great and it was “good enough” for me. I booked a ride home and got some more sleep after that. Since I had nothing else to do tonight, I decided on just chilling at home. In the evening, I had nothing to do so I just spent some time browsing the Internet. I eventually got a room booked at City Garden GRAND Hotel and eventually booked a ride there. I got there quite easily and just chilled for the rest of the evening, even though I didn't do anything meaningful for the rest of the time there.

Song of the day: Marvin Gaye (feat. Meghan Trainor) by Charlie Puth

Hotel Mini-Stay!

Sat, 20 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Makati

Saturday was pretty much half of a blur, too. But in the afternoon, I finally woke up and saw that my sister was preparing to leave for her thing today. I just ate a bit and I was mostly bored. I decided on whether or not I'll book a hotel today because I needed some well-deserved rest and I wanted to sleep at someplace better. I initially decided against it, but pushed through it regardless. I was able to book a suite this time at a fancy 4-star hotel. I took a while to get a ride and I was already so conscious because I had booked a room late and it was getting late, too. Ideally, I should book for a day at a hotel at around 12 noon to 1 p.m. at the latest. But today was fine, and it was my way of giving myself a break from all the shit that has been going on for the past few months or so. I just needed some time to be with myself, get some rest, and work on a few things on my MacBook. I eventually got there and the check-in was actually quite simple and straightforward. After I checked in and saw the room, I was kind of impressed, to be honest. This looked like some condominium room and it had a kitchen area, as well as a dining table. It was pretty nice and I immediately enjoyed the cold aircon throughout the whole unit. After that, I called Mom for a bit and we discussed what we were planning to do over the holidays. I went outside to Mendokoro to eat dinner and it was pretty nice, I got the Super Chashu again, as always, and I got a chashu burger for takeout. I walked around to get some coffee at Starbucks and I got myself a cake while I'm at it. I was surprised that there was a Ramen Nagi nearby and I decided on whether or not I should eat there tomorrow since I wanted to try the lobster tail ramen again, but then I just went back to the hotel since I was burning time while I was out. For the rest of the evening, I was mostly concerned with just chilling and catching up on my mood calendar entries for the past few days. I couldn't sleep tonight for some reason, but I mostly spent the time just enjoying how nice the stay here was and taking it all in. I eventually thought that it would be worth it to work hard enough to be able to afford a place like this as a home in the future.

Song of the day: ロキ by Mikito P

Journal entry for Friday, December 19th, 2025

Fri, 19 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Friday was pretty much a blur. I continued accompanying someone throughout the whole night. We didn't really do much aside from just casually talking and watching YouTube videos. In the morning, before they got off work, they saw that I had purchased this Korean dating sim game. I told them that I was hopeless in getting a date this year so, pathetically, I'm kinda back with just looking for digital affection and shit. They told me that I shouldn't play it over the weekend and wait for them so that they can watch while I play the game. They also showed me a pic of the women in the game and we decided on the same woman as the prettiest of the bunch. After that, they left the call because they had other stuff to do. I mostly rested for the rest of the day and I didn't really do much, to be honest. My body clock has been extremely shot over the past few days that I couldn't stay awake much and was dozing off too much.

Song of the day: NOT CUTE ANYMORE by ILLIT

Journal entry for Thursday, December 18th, 2025

Thu, 18 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

For today, nothing really happened and I just accompanied someone throughout their night shift. I accompanied them to the end, but that's mostly it. Nothing much happened for the rest of the day. Someone mostly didn't reply throughout the whole day. And my sister had to cancel our plans for our trip tomorrow because she has someplace else to go and Dad can't travel back and forth to Manila. So we just had to call it off. In the evening, I didn't do much. I tried to get some rest on and off, and I talked to someone about Giselle. After that, I joined them for their nightly call and things continued from there.

Song of the day: bing bong by bbno$, VNLLA

Dad Comes Over

Wed, 17 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Bonifacio Global City

For Wednesday, I initially didn't plan on anything today. I just accompanied someone throughout their entire work shift but that was mostly it. Nothing noteworthy happened the whole night. I tried to get as much sleep as I can because Dad would be coming over today and, when I woke up in the afternoon, I saw him already outside with my sister. He just handed over some gifts that he got for us from his family's trip to Japan and I liked the Cinnamoroll stuff that he gave, which was nice. My dad went somewhere else to get his back and spine adjusted, and he says that we can't go out today since he has other plans for the evening. Regardless, my sister and I wanted to go out so we just planned to go out ourselves. We got ready but also waited for Dad to come back so we can bid him goodbye. Dad eventually came back and saw us all dressed, but he didn't want to just leave us so he decided to tag along with us in going out. We got into his car and quickly drove to BGC. We stopped by our grandfather's gravestone to pay respects and we quickly met up with one of uncles. We continued to BGC after that, we ate at Ramen Nagi and Dad paid the bill for us. We then planned to go home, but on our way, we stopped to fetch our uncle from earlier. We stopped by at Dunkin' on Bayani Road and we talked for a bit as we got coffee and they basically decided in trying to goad our grandmother into coming along with us for our December 19 trip to Pampanga. We then went to my Dad's house and then we met up with our grandmother. We stayed a while at our Dad's house, it was mostly my sister that did the convincing and tried to get my grandmother to come along. After that, we had a small jamming session and Ailysh mostly played a few instruments that our uncle from earlier had in his recording studio. After that, we went home. For the rest of the evening, I still stayed up. Luckily, someone and Luan were still awake so we played Escape the Backrooms for a while. We finished a few stages, and we also completed the house stage. We ended on a level that was kind of an experimentation room. After that, we tried to install some Lethal Company mods that Luan gave us but that didn't work. So we just called it a night. I still accompanied someone after this, and I just accompanied them overnight since I didn't have work the next day.

Journal entry for Tuesday, December 16th, 2025

Tue, 16 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

It was finally Tuesday! My last day of work for the year and the day before my looonngg vacation. I was mostly giddy today because it would be my vacation tomorrow and I could really use some rest. It was nice to get to this day. For most of the day, nothing much actually happened aside from me doing a few things with regards to my work. I just finished up some important stuff for most of the day. Once all of my tasks were done, I closed my work laptop and hopefully until next year. I got on to play Escape the Backrooms with someone and Luan. We started back at the hotel stage and I was eventually able to rescue us from that stage because I was the last one alive and we collected all of the letters. Luan also helped by providing me the key. After that, we got through a few stages, like a hot stage with large moths, a poolrooms stage, a red hospital stage, a video rental stage, a stage with liminal houses on a hill. We had other stages as well after that, like a circus stage that had this scary clown. I'm honestly glad I got us out of that stage, too. Then one dark stage with LiDAR sensors, a thalassophobia stage, an under the sea stage, and finally an underwater cave stage where we had to cross a bridge. We had to leave after that because someone had to get some rest and I joined them in a voice call shortly after. For the rest of the evening, nothing much happened aside from us watching a few YouTube videos. We watched one about Kratom but that was mostly it. Our call continued to the next day, however.

Song of the day: two by bbno$

Journal entry for Monday, December 15th, 2025

Mon, 15 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Monday was the start of my workday as usual but I started it with little to no sleep at all. For some reason, I just couldn't get to bed. I'm not sure, but I guess it had something to do with the cat screaming nearby. I felt so heartbroken by it and I really wished that God would do something to save it or help it. Still, I eventually fell asleep at around 4 or 5 or so. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened. I just continued some usual tasks for work and I'm glad I was able to time in okay. I just did my tasks and also chilled for quite a bit. In the evening, I eventually got off from work and I got into playing games with someone and Luan. We played Peak first and we watched the bbno$ concert there which was fun. After that, we played Escape the Backrooms and, at first, it was pretty scary. But we eventually got the hang of it and we managed to make it past a few levels, both of which were a mixture of fun and scary. It was super nice to play a new game with them and I eventually realized that this was kind of an escape room game and that we were figuring out clues to escape to the next room, which was pretty neat. We eventually get to the second level of the hotel place and we called it off from there. After that, Exavier reached out to me about his work and we talked for around 30 minutes about his plans for work and the future. We eventually settled on a solid plan for him to follow and it was nice to be of help to him and I hope that we can push through it by next year. I went to take a bath after that and got in a call with someone. We eventually pushed through with watching Sunshine (2024) and we actually finished it! It was nice and someone definitely liked the movie a lot. It was so realistic to one's experiences, too. It's crazy. After that, we got to watch a video about it by ImCarl and we watched a few other YouTube videos that someone recommended as our call stretched to the next day.

Song of the day: NOT CUTE ANYMORE by ILLIT

Journal entry for Sunday, December 14th, 2025

Sun, 14 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Saturday started with me still continuing to call someone as we normally would on Fridays. This night, we got pizza and I was able to finish mine again. I eventually got sleepy at around 6 a.m. or so and we were kind of both sleeping at that time anyway. Someone asked me if I should get some sleep and thankfully they let me go after that without issue. I slept for a while but then woke up at 11 a.m. I got ready regardless and it took me such a long time to book a ride to the KTV place. It took me more than 1 hour to book a ride and booking for apps took a big shot out of my battery, around 40% down from 100% which was just whack. Eventually, I found an Angkas ride and the whole trip was pretty quick. I eventually got to the place and I was surprised that there was a Banapple nearby so I just grabbed coffee there and waited for someone. Eventually, someone arrived and it was nice that she called out to me. We then went upstairs and got into our karaoke room. I think someone went first to song on the mic and she picked out a Taylor Swift song, she also wanted a corner seat. I saw plugs all over the room and kind of regretted not bringing a charger with me, but whatever. We sang quite a lot of songs after that, and I mostly sang pop songs that were very high pitched, so it was hard for me to match them, but I still sang them anyways. Around the end of our karaoke session, we exchanged gifts with each other and she got her Rolife but didn't open it. I did get her Bing Bong plushie and a few gashapons of aespa and Freiren. She didn't get Freiren specifically but she still enjoyed the gashapon regardless. She gifted me a Marlboro bubble thing, which was cute. But she eventually gave me my actual gift which was this Cinnamoroll gift box filled with lots of Cinnamoroll stuff. It was so cute and I was just shocked at how thoughtful this gift was. We sang a few more songs after that and someone suggested we sing more lively, upbeat songs. I was the last singer and I sang California Gurls by Katy Perry. After that, someone had to go and eventually went to do her own stuff for the rest of the day. I waited a while and then paid for the KTV session, which was only around 600 Pesos since I already paid 1,000 Pesos on Wednesday. I took a while to book a ride but eventually found a ride. It was nice seeing this new electric car and I was talking a bit to the driver. The estimate in the app showed that it was only going to be 140-160 or so Pesos which was pretty cheap. But the ride suddenly got sour as the driver asked me if he could take the expressway rather than going straight through my house. That's when it hit me that I was getting scammed. He went through the expressway, made me pay for the toll, and then got stuck in traffic through several busy intersections. When I got off the ride, I paid 387 and it was a far cry from the 160 Pesos estimate. This total bonehead took the longest route for me to pay the most amount and I fucking hated it. It seriously made my blood boil and almost ruined my day. I don't mind the amount lost, but I just got angry at how I got finessed and scammed this bad. He even tried to take a different route all in an attempt to extort more money out of me but I was able to course correct him. I was so close to just wanting to leave the car at that point. I hated every second of it and it not only burned my money, it burned a lot of the time I had for the day even though it was just 1 hour or 2 hours. When I got home, I was still fuming and I wondered if the package was stolen, too. But I eventually found it. I talked to Mom for a bit and then we left the call once my sister got home. I made her unbox her new tablet and I was glad that she did get a tablet and that it wasn't stolen in transit. After that, I then went and set it up, got it updated, configured settings, and all that. But once that was done, I gave it to my sister and she seemed to enjoy it. I just chilled for the rest of the evening, mostly I just browsed the Internet before I went to sleep.

Song of the day: Sugar (feat. Wynter) by Flo Rida, Wynter Gordon

Karaoke with Someone!

Sat, 13 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Some KTV

Song of the day: California Gurls by Katy Perry

Journal entry for Friday, December 12th, 2025

Fri, 12 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For the day, nothing important happened. I just had my usual shift. In the evening, I wrapped up with all my work for the week and then got to play 1 whole game of Peak with someone and Luan. Someone suggested that we play it, so that was what we played first. We passed through the shore just fine, with Luan sadly dying through a certain part. But today had the tropics which was pretty easy. Someone said that the tropics used to be hard, but I generally don't find it a hard biome and I said that the mesa biome was way more difficult. We actually all got through the jungle biome just fine and we got a mystical item, that being the “faerie” lantern. We passed by the early area of the mesa and I found that Bing Bong's temple entrance wasn't open today so I just tried to find the oasis. We haven't been in the mesa biome for a while but we were able to push through it. We found the oasis and we were able to get a crispberry since someone was planning on completing the gourmand badge today. We got through the first half of the mesa just fine, but it was the second part that culled us. We tried our best to climb and I used a shelf fungus to get us through a specific area. I used a chain launcher after that and that's where Luan died. Someone didn't have enough stamina to cross so she just tried to find her own way. I just kept climbing up and up until some static appeared on screen. It was the scoutmaster's thing and I was marked for death, in a way, because someone was still alive and I had left them behind. It was fine and eventually someone died but the static filter on my screen still persisted. I eventually was able to make it to the top of the mesa after such a grueling climb but the static filter on the screen still persisted. I had to leave the game and rejoin, and when I did, I sadly lost all of that extra stamina that I was saving up for, which sucks. But we passed through the caldera just fine with no one dying, thankfully. We got to the kiln and this is where shit began to happen. I had a lot of damage and poor stamina at the start, with a lot of hunger, too, so that was a pain. I had difficulty in passing through the first areas of the caldera to the point where I just died at 1 spot. Thankfully, since we didn't die through the caldera so our enchanted item for this biome was a scout effigy, which someone used immediately to revive me. I'm glad I got brought back and I pressed on with them. We got through a part near the middle of the kiln and this is where Luan's stamina was too low for him to climb. He fell way down and even fell again after trying again. My stamina was also too low for me to climb up a wall so someone just went on ahead without me. I tried to find an alternate route and someone eventually made it to some luggages which had a rescue claw. It was super clutch for me because it meant that someone could bring me up to the higher platform that she was on. After that, we tried to find a way up and I went back to the luggages to get the scout cannon, since I thought it would come in handy. And it did come in handy at a specific part. The wall we were facing had an easier way to the peak so we used the scout cannon. I tried to position it to the rocks as best as I could and we actually were able to make it through! The last part was the easiest part and I was so glad I was able to make it to the peak with someone. We eventually left the game to play Castle Crashers and we played a few rounds. We chose new characters and somehow our stats were reset, but we still played through and had fun. We got really stuck at one level and so we called it off after that. Someone and I were still just chatting on Discord after that until eventually someone invites me to watch them play Is This Seat Taken.

Song of the day: Saturday Night by Jessica

Journal entry for Thursday, December 11th, 2025

Thu, 11 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For the rest of the day, nothing much happened. Work continued as usual and I just finished my tasks for the day. In the evening, I played R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan. We played through a lot of stages and it was so fun because we had a lot of weapons by the end and we were admittedly pretty powerful already. I stayed up because I wanted to buy that Galaxy Tablet for my sister.

Song of the day: Dilaw by Maki

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Ngayong nand'yan ka na, 'di magmamadali
Ikaw lang ang katabi hanggang sa ang buhok ay pumuti
'Di na maghahanap ng kung anong sagot sa mga tanong
Dahil ikaw ang katiyakan ko
Hinding-hindi na ako bibitaw, ngayong ikaw na ang kasayaw
Kung meron mang kulay ang aking nagsisilbing tanglaw
Ikaw, ikaw ay dilaw

Last Day in the Office for 2025!

Wed, 10 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today would be my last day in the office for the rest of the year. I'm just really glad I worked on-site for 5 days straight last year. All that's left now is to attend the other team's lunch event. I woke up and I immediately tried to book a ride to the office. I wore my usual Friday outfit even though it was a Wednesday because I wanted to wear something loose and comfortable. It was really nice to just have the best possible outfit I have for today. I tried to book a ride immediately to the office but as usual, it took me quite a long time. It was already getting late, too, and I was just left at the mercy of these apps. I was using 3 phones at this point: my sister's Galaxy, my Google Pixel, and my iPhone, all running around 8 ride-hailing apps and with different accounts. It really sucks that it was this late into the morning and I'm still having trouble finding a ride. Eventually, I found one and immediately went to them and forgot my phone charger as I left for work. I got to work and immediately left behind my things and got my computer basically set up. I walked as fast as I can to them since they were already eating. I got there really late and they were already finished with their food, but it was fine since they just let me get something for take-out. After that, I was able to join them for a quick game of Avalon and I was surprised that everyone knew the rules from the get-go. I was on the bad team for the first round and I didn't get to 'fail' the missions that much since I wasn't picked much. But I still tried to play and we eventually won the first round. We played another round and I was on the bad/red team again, with us being the same 3 players. It was seriously crazy but I'm glad I was able to win 2 games of Avalon in a row, which was pretty cool. We went back to the office after that but I had to run back because of my meeting. When I came back, though, the meeting didn't even start and I did all that running for nothing. I could've gotten coffee with them, but instead I didn't, which kind of sucked since this would be my last day in the office and I wanted to spend time with the officemates. After that, nothing eventful happened that much. I did accompany a coworker to Glorietta and to other stores to help him find a Funko Pop thing that we was looking for. He pronounced Funko so weirdly and I had to correct him, and I found it funny that the store clerks didn't understand him much either when he tried his pronunciation. But we didn't find was he was looking for, although I did enjoy the walk because it helped me get a lot of steps. I also brought the official Bing Bong with me and took a few pictures. At this point, I was also worried that my Apple Watch wouldn't make it to the end of the day. It was already super drained as it was. Adding insult to injury, I tried to charge it earlier but it wasn't actually charging because it wasn't plugged into the outlet. So now it was really around 20% charge and I didn't know anyone who had an Apple Watch charger. I just tried to turn off the screen while still walking around. Eventually, my coworkers left one by one and I was left alone. At the end of my shift, I had dinner by myself to celebrate my time in the office and my office life for this year in general. It was pretty great and work really has been a blessing. I didn't know where to eat, so I just kept walking around and settled on eating at Chili's. I had fun sitting with my barside seat and the server was really attentive, so that's nice. I also bought an additional gift for someone. The bill wasn't that expensive and, after that, I booked a ride home. Thankfully, I managed to find a ride and the ride home was pretty smooth, except for near the end because I wanted to get to the bathroom so badly. After I got home, I cleaned up and got ready for the night. Since I'll be working from home, I got into a call with someone and it extended to the next day.

Song of the day: FOCUS by Hearts2Hearts

Journal entry for Tuesday, December 9th, 2025

Tue, 09 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday started out pretty okay. The day by itself was pretty boring with me just doing my usual round of work tasks. In the evening, I didn't do much aside from talk to someone and they made me play this new horror game they found named Shawarma Kiosk: Anomalies. It was pretty scary, even though I've played a bit of horror games in my time. I was more interested in finishing it because I had failed at it multiple times, but eventually I was able to complete an entire shift in the game. I was really surprised that a game like that could be on Roblox, I thought that Roblox was just some kids game.

Song of the day: Changes by Butterfly Boucher, David Bowie

Journal entry for Monday, December 8th, 2025

Mon, 08 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I had just recently learned that Monday would be a holiday for the Philippines and I was honestly surprised, but I was also glad because I could really, really need the day off. And I honestly did, in a way. But I started the morning off just staying up, browsing IG Reels and, when I finally decided to sleep, I heard some super-weird sounds around my room. These were super strange sounds like paper moving or a bottle moving. At first I thought they were mice moving around my room, but the sounds were kind of loud enough for them to not be mice. It was also strange since I haven't seen any traces of mice in a long, long time. So I was honestly surprised and even spooked out a little. I even thought that I was going through a schizophrenic episode or that this was early onset schizophrenia, but I just attributed the noise to mice. I eventually passed out. In the morning, nothing much happened and I slept long enough for it to be afternoon so soon. My sister made lunch which was some fish soup, or *sinigang*. I liked it, but I couldn't finish a lot of it since it wasn't my thing. For the rest of the afternoon, I mostly just caught up on my mood calendar entries until I was fully caught up with this week's entries. Once I was done, I finally decided that this would be the day I finally got that massage I've been planning. So I decided to get ready and told my sister, who was in the middle of disassembling our old table and assembling the new one. She wanted to tag along so I agreed and we both got ready. We charged up our stuff and then separately booked a ride to BGC so we could get our massage. We eventually got to the massage place and we made the critical mistake of not booking for an appointment beforehand, so the only one available was this 60-minute aromatherapy massage, which we just took because we just walked in. We drank a few iced teas that they had and we got our massages started. I asked the masseuse to harden their massage pressure because my body felt really sore and light massages don't work with me. But I was wrong since the masseuse was really strong and they really went ham on my back and back muscles. It was painful, but I endured it as I usually would. I had a runny nose the whole time and I couldn't blow my nose, which kind of made it uncomfortable, on top of the masseuse absolutely turning my back into clay. After all was said and done, I felt nice even though I was a bit sore. I was also surprised that the masseuse's didn't ask for a tip from either of us, which was just weird since I was so used to massage places asking for tips. After we paid for our massage, we took quite a long walk to Coco Ichibanya because I wanted to try some Japanese curry again. She didn't know it, but I just showed her the way and we just talked about life stuff until we got there. We got seated quickly since there weren't that many people in there and I showed my sister some menu items. We both went for the pork cutlet omurice with curry, and we had other stuff on the side like drinks, ice cream, and a salad. We mostly talked about stuff that went on in the house a couple of days and what my cousin has been up to, and how it's been really troubling. It was fun to hear about it, for what it's worth, and we eventually finish up our meals. We take a bit of a walk around Burgos Circle more to burn off some of the food we had and then we circled back to the Starbucks on the opposite side of Coco Ichibanya. I got us white chocolate and we were able to find a ride home after that.

Song of the day: NOT CUTE ANYMORE by ILLIT

Journal entry for Sunday, December 7th, 2025

Sun, 07 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was the day I finally got some well-needed rest. After how hellish Thursday, Friday, and Saturday have been, I finally got my well-needed rest and relaxation, and I made the most out of it, too. My Apple Watch clocked in 10 hours of sleep and that's quite a lot of rest, honestly. I felt so rested afterwards because my room was cold as hell. I didn't have much planned for the day, honestly. I thought about spending it outside, but nah, I just wanted to stay at home, relax, and chill. My sister made hearty breakfast and that made us feel so full, we skipped out on lunch. For the afternoon, I mostly just kept to myself and got my much-needed time alone. I watched some Arirang shows on my Apple TV and I saw one featuring UNIS' Kotoko and Gehlee! I took a photo and showed it to someone, and then talked to them for a while before I was alone again. I also got my Christmas gift for them, so that was nice. I just assisted with helping my sister and her boyfriend with the new table that my sister bought and I organized some of the cables. They were finishing up with putting the table so I thought that this would be the time that I got my sister a Google TV Streamer 4K. I've been hinting at buying that for her as some random, QoL room gift and I just thought that I'd get it now since she has this new monitor setup and it could be better if she could watch TV on her bed. I booked a ride to Market! Market! and I got there pretty quick. Too quick, honestly. I just stopped by Datablitz to buy it and thankfully they had it in stock. I had called them earlier, too, just to confirm. So I'm glad I was able to buy it right off the bat. I then thought about getting a massage, but nah, I wanted to gift this to my sister as soon as possible. Thankfully, I got to go home pretty quick and I found a ride despite how crowded this place was. When I got home, my sister and I set up the Google TV and I installed a few apps on it. I mainly installed this IPTV app so my sister could stream IPTV from Japan and she actually really liked it. She spent the entire night just watching NHK World and it was also cool that my sister has a smart TV box of her own. For the rest of the evening, I just kept to myself and just rested.

FNaF 2 with Naomi!

Sat, 06 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

This was a very tiring and weird way to start Saturday on. I kept trying to book a ride to SM BF in Parañaque and I kept trying to book for a ride for hours, but none of those actually went through. I was already so, so late by the time I got a ride **AND**, to add insult to injury, I forgot my wallet at home. I am a bit glad that I didn't lose it or it fell off on my hectic commute, but I am just a little disheartened that I'll have to get my sister to ship it to me, and that it'll cost me money. I eventually got to SM BF fine and it wasn't long before I saw Naomi near the cinemas. I tried to ask if I could get our movie ticket rescheduled, but they told us that we couldn't. So I just paid for the 1,200 Pesos out of my pocket so that we could watch the movie at a later time. To pass the time, Naomi and I chilled at Starbucks for a few hours, and we mainly waited there because I had set that as the pickup place for my wallet. I bought Naomi some coffee and also met her “girlfriend.” Well, I didn't know what they were, but they seem to be in a mutual, romantic relationship and I talked to them for a bit, and I eventually got my wallet. Naomi's girlfriend eventually left and it was just Naomi and I walking around. I decide on Sumo Niku for us since it has been a while (kinda) since I last had samgyeopsal. And we ate there until the time before the movie started. We mostly just talked on a few topics, which was fun, and we eventually went to watch the movie afterward. The movie theater here was surprisingly pretty spacious, compared to the other SM and other theaters I've been in. This is probably the most spacious one yet. We watched the film and it was pretty okay for me, I enjoyed it to an extent. After that, we took a few more pictures before eventually exiting the mall. Naomi went to buy J.CO for her family, and it was nice to see her buy with the money that she have even though I offered to buy her, which was pretty nice. She went home after that and I was able to find a ride home shortly afterward. It was pretty fun, all in all, and I'm glad I was able to survive this day despite having so little sleep.

Journal entry for Friday, December 5th, 2025

Fri, 05 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday was finally the last day I would spend in the office for the week, and this was such a tiring week, to be honest. My week was not over yet but I still had to push through this crucial day. In the morning, a courier arrived to deliver me the package I ordered online. It was the official Bing Bong plushie by Aggro Crab and Landfall Games! It was super cute! I loved it and I still loved my custom-made Bing Bong plushie, but I still found this one cute. I had a bit of a hard time booking for a ride and, when I did, I immediately grabbed Bing Bong to bring with me to the office. It was a pretty fun day in the office, I mostly joked around my coworkers. We ate out at this cool Japanese restaurant we've never been. I was actually in an important call when they had to leave for lunch and I basically had to rush to them after my call was finished. I'm glad I have a bit of the route to Glorietta memorized so I was able to catch up with them just as they were getting seated. But I really enjoyed the Japanese food we had, even though it was a little bit expensive. I'm glad that the bill I had to pay worked to be around 500 Pesos, which was pretty nice for a huge lunch like this. While we were on the way back, I treated 1 coworker to try that Dubai chocolate thing at llaollao and I also got to try it, my other coworker also tried it because he/they saw us get it so it was nice. Our usual things at work continued. We went out for *merienda* in the afternoon and I ordered some *siomai*. It was **A LOT** of *siomai*, actually. I wanted to get 6 pieces, half of which would've been chicken and mushroom, and the other half some sharksfin ones. But instead, I got 12 pieces, 6 being chicken and mushroom, and the other 6 being sharksfin. I couldn't finish them all, even though I offered some to my coworkers. I was so full by the end of the day, too, and I stayed for a bit to do some additional but light work. Thankfully, I was able to easily book a car ride home that wasn't much hassle, although I couldn't sleep much on the way home. In the evening, I just tried to relax and eventually someone and I got into a call for Friday like usual.

Journal entry for Thursday, December 4th, 2025

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Thursday, December 4, has got to be the craziest start to a morning yet. In the morning, I still could not believe that I was at a hotel room somewhere in Makati. This was definitely the strangest way I've started a morning, but I wanted to make the most out of it by having some good breakfast downstairs. I'm glad I picked the room with included breakfast and I had a good dish of *beef tapa* or something served, and I added in an additional omelette because I wanted to make the most out of my stay. After that, I got up and packed my bags, and then booked a ride directly to the office. The ride to the office was the craziest part because I was just so close by and the ride wasn't even 100 Pesos or so, and I even quickly got a ride, too. I got to the office less stressed than I usually was, which was a super nice change of pace compared to my usual routine. I also brought my Google Pixel 9 with me so I was able to show that to my coworkers and even tried to add some cards to Google Wallet. In the afternoon, we tried that new brioche bun at llaollao, which was pretty good. I just had fun in the office like usual and I pretty much went home after wrapping up with some tasks. In the evening, I had enough time to play R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan. We played a few stages of R.E.P.O. until we moved on to Peak, which was our main highlight of the evening. I had a run start on the base difficulty and we had the roots and alpine biomes in rotation today. The shore was surprisingly difficult for me because it had been a while since we last played, and the new roots biome was no easy task for us either. Luan died here and it was up to someone and I to cross. I remember that I gave her a chain launcher that they eventually used as a crucial tool later in the run. I also died in the roots biome, leaving someone to climb alone for the bulk of it. I also ate a berry that I should have given her, but that's beside the point. They were able to make it and Luan and I got resurrected afterward. For the alpine biome, Luan and I also died quickly at the start, leaving someone to figure out the path alone, and I tried to heavily guide them this time. I showed them paths they can climb up to and they even had a misstep that caused them to fall down a bit. But thankfully they persevered and still finished the biome fine, which was a super big relief. For the caldera, we were complete again but somehow Luan died around halfway because he just jumped and fell into lava. My hunger, damage, and heat were taking big chunks out of my stamina bar but I was able to make it, with someone definitely passing through the biome easily. It was our last stage after that: the kiln. Luan wasn't aware that the lava starts rising now and he fell after a failed chain launcher use. I also fell in that same chain launcher path because I didn't have enough stamina, but I'm glad I didn't have much items with me anyway. It was up to someone and I tried to guide them as best as I can. It was so nerve-wracking seeing them and guide them because this part of Peak is the scariest part. One mistake or slip-up could mean the end of a hard-worked run. But I'm glad someone was able to climb so well that she eventually got to the peak and won. It was a big sigh of relief and my extremities felt so cold after that game. It was definitely one hell of a run but I'm glad that at least someone was able to go through it just fine. We stopped playing after that.

Song of the day: Topping by ILLIT

Journal entry for Wednesday, December 3rd, 2025

Wed, 03 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

For Wednesday, my workday wasn't that much special, I had lunch out with my coworkers and we just had lunch nearby. In the afternoon, a coworker accompanied me to get this gift because I was planning to be a participant in the “exchange gift”/white elephant celebration later. I initially tried to buy a hand fan, but the clerk was missing and the other stuff at the hand fan place only had the expensive ones, so I passed out on those and settled on cheap wireless earbuds. After that, I just went back to work to continue my usual daily round of tasks. In the evening, we had this small Christmas/year-end celebration for our department. It was a pretty small gathering with a few people involved, most of whom I just pass by without second thought. But it was nice to play a few games with them. Our main game was this “guess the murderer” type of game where people randomly got packs of cards. And somehow, **I GOT THE MURDERER CARD** and I couldn't believe it. I was the murderer and it was so funny and also raised my heartbeat a lot throughout the entire night. I was trying not to act suspicious and luckily our team one 5 new packs of cards, one of which I just took and used as my decoy, and I basically hid my main pack of cards for the entirety of the night. Keeping a lot profile isn't really my thing especially when I'm involved in some tomfoolery but I think I was able to keep it down okay. Luckily, no one to my knowledge was able to guess that I was the murderer and I got an electric kettle as an exchange gift present. All in all, I had fun and I was able to reveal to my coworkers that I got the murderer card before I left the building. At first, they didn't believe it, but I showed them the white card that said I was the murderer and they were impressed. I left the office after that and I booked a ride home after a bit of difficulty. At home, I got to playing a few rounds of R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan. We had some difficulty, especially with a piano that someone mostly struggled with, but we were able to get it extracted just fine. After our game session, I didn't do much aside from checking my Spotify Wrapped and talking to someone for a bit. They just gave out boring-ass lines so I didn't reply much to them and that's the time I had the idea to get a booking and book for a hotel this late at night. I just pushed on with it since it didn't seem to cost much, to be honest.

Song of the day: STYLE by Hearts2Hearts

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Baby you make me smile
네 Style은 다 맞아
그게 너라서 더 좋아
Got that one of a kind
You got it
'Cause you're just my type
and I like your style

Dududu dududu
Dududu dududu
'Cause you're just my type
and I like your style
Dududu dududu
Dududu dududu
Yeah you're just my type
and I like your style

Journal entry for Tuesday, December 2nd, 2025

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Tuesday still had me staying up from my call with someone until 4 a.m. or so. I got a few hours of sleep, which wasn't much. It made me wake up late and start my morning late, too. I even ate before leaving. It took me such a long time to book a ride to the office, to the point that I only got one. It was such a weird feeling commuting to the office in the afternoon and it was really hot. Nothing much happened at work today, and I actually didn't even do much. I didn't even have food out because I was so conscious of the time and I had quite a few things, too. But in the afternoon, I was able to go out for a bit to grab some matcha. I had quite a lot of free time so I talked to this new girl Zel and she was kind of fun to talk to, she kept the conversation active and going. My boring day in the office continued into the evening where I had a bit of difficulty in booking a ride home, but I eventually got home fine.

Song of the day: KEEP UP by Odetari

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Keep up, I'm too fa-ast, I'm too fa-a-ast
Push my foot up on that pedal, then I'm gone
(G-g-g-gone, g-g-gone, gone)
Keep up on my track, on my track
Boy, I'll dust ya, keep my numbers going strong
(Strong, strong, str-str-str-strong; g-g-g-g-grand slam)

Journal entry for Monday, December 1st, 2025

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

December the 1st was pretty chill, to be honest. I did wake up late and I had to go to work immediately. It took a while for me to book a ride to the office, but I eventually got there and I was pretty much alone. My usual seatmates weren't there so I was having another day in the office alone, which was both nice and kind of lonely. For lunch, I just had Pepper Lunch but I tried out this new lamb meat that they had. I haven't had lamb in years and the flavor was really something else. It was so strange tasting it, too. I just waited until it was fully cooked before I could eat it. It was a strange experience, but I can say that I enjoyed it a bit. I went to work and focused hard on this task for the bulk of the afternoon. I didn't do much nor talk to much people in the office. I chatted with 1 coworker for a bit, grabbed my Christmas gift “basket”/box, and after work I just had to grab groceries. I just got some fish and a few meats, but the line at the checkout isle was pretty long. I was thankfully able to book a ride home after a bit of wait, and I just had to get a car ride home because there was no way in hell I was going to carry this heavy-ass box and some groceries on a motorcycle ride home. Thankfully, the car driver that I got wasn't that talkative and the traffic wasn't that bad, either. I was able to sleep for a bit and I was actually surprised that the ride only took 40 minutes. But when I got home, I had a bit of rest before I got into a call with someone. The call we had was pretty long, and it stretched to a lot of topics like me just lowering my standards just to get a girlfriend. Ultimately, they just told me to have this conversation again tomorrow.

Song of the day: KEEP UP by Odetari

Journal entry for Sunday, November 30th, 2025

Sun, 30 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I’m honestly glad that today and this weekend didn’t have anything major going on. It was kind of a good change of pace considering how much I’ve been doing out the past few weeks or so, so I’m glad that today didn’t really have much in store. I started with commuting home from Starbucks and then staying up pretty much the entire night. I pretty much finished Rush Hour 2 (2001), so that was nice, but I just stayed up because I couldn’t sleep at all. For the rest of the day, I slept at some parts and I was kind of hassled a bit since my uncle wanted me to pay for some house repairs and I didn’t have cash on hand. Eventually, my sister went home and had some money on her so I just paid her for that. I was able to order out Army Navy again and I’ve been putting it off for so long because of how it affects my acid or how big a meal it was before sleeping. I just ate it while rewatching some episodes of Smiling Friends, so that was fun. In the evening, nothing much happened and I primarily helped my sister find her lost phone and back up her device. I also took a trip down memory lane and checking out old photos of my former work laptop, the 13-inch MacBook Pro M2 that I had from Dice. I couldn’t believe that I had that MacBook for 2+ years. It was such a memorable device and, while my current MacBook Pro is way better, it still hurts because that laptop had some sentimental value to it. I took a look at all of the places I went with it and it was really nice to just look back.

Song of the day: Fuck Tha Police by N.W.A.

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Fuck the police comin' straight from the underground

Journal entry for Saturday, November 29th, 2025

Sat, 29 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday had me still accompanying my friends throughout their night shift as is usual between us. Today we had a really deep discussion about a lot of things, mainly about living and dying, the nature of our friendship, their issues, and where I want to head in the future. It got really deep and real for a second but eventually we moved to our usual, basic topics and the night continued on. Our call continued until the morning where we got food and I treated them to some McDonald’s. I also had food and ordered some Jollibee as the morning was starting. We just watched a few videos on YouTube and they then asked if I’m down to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003) and I was. We had some trouble trying to watch it on streaming sites but we eventually able to watch it once I downloaded it. Someone recognized some of the cast members because they were also in Pride & Prejudice (2005), so that was cool. But eventually we passed out while on call. When I woke up, my friends had left the call and they disconnected me from the call, too. I just got on my day, ate some lunch and then eventually left for Starbucks 32nd Street. I didn’t order much, just a white chocolate mocha. I mostly caught up on some of this week’s mood calendar entries and then prepared that website content brief for the website designer Pat recommended. After that, I went home to just browse the Internet for a while before falling asleep.

Song of the day: All Of The Lights by Kanye West

Lyrics that resonated with me:
All of the lights
Lights, lights
All of the lights

Journal entry for Friday, November 28th, 2025

Fri, 28 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday was finally my last day in the office for November and I was quite late in getting to the office today. I arrived at work so tired and so exhausted that I needed a while to catch my breath. But after that, I was able to bounce back and focus on my tasks. I had lunch out with 1 coworker and they were pretty chill to talk to. They told me that they bought another phone yesterday, in addition to the other phone that they got yesterday, too. We talked about our past work experiences and then we quickly headed back to the office after eating. For the rest of the day, I was mostly engrossed with my work. I did move from my seat and sat next to them for the rest of the day, so that was nice. We eventually headed out again in the afternoon to grab some *merienda* and I had some Dairy Queen. My coworker got another phone, an iPhone 15 and it was a base model with 128GB of storage. He financed it again like the ones yesterday and I was surprised that it cost around 46,000 and I really couldn’t believe it. I bought my iPhone 15 with 256GB of storage and it only cost me around 39,000 Pesos. I looked online at the base model again and it only close 28,000 Pesos online. It was seriously unbelievable how much expensive it was and my coworker really got scammed. When we returned to the office, I showed it to my other coworker and they couldn’t believe that they bought another phone and they assumed that it was actually the box for my phone, but no, my coworker really did buy an iPhone and we just laughed at how much the price discrepancy was between the financed phone and the one found online. But eventually my coworkers went home by themselves and I had a few things to wrap up before booking a ride home. I had several riders cancel on me again and it was such a pain to re-book, but I eventually found another ride. The guy told me that he wanted to cancel my booking but he eventually went with it and the ride home didn’t have that bad of traffic, surprisingly. I quickly got home and had a few things hassle and stress me out, like carrying cat food and even my uncle wanting to connect to our Wi-Fi so he could watch his shows. But I know that the people downstairs would definitely want to connect to our Wi-Fi, so I just hooked him up to the PLDT router and I had a call with my friends.

Song of the day: Crash by Matt Wills

A Day Without Music

Thu, 27 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

For Thursday, it was just a usual, fun day in the office for me. But this day was totally boring because I left my AirPods Pro back at home. I had no music the entire day and it kind of made the day suck a bit. I joined my seatmates to lunch out and we ate in the food court this time. Lunch wasn’t really anything noteworthy aside from me talking to my seatmates’ new teammate, but that was mostly it. I went back to the office and I just focused on some tasks. In the afternoon, I had a lot of free time, so I joined my coworker in walking a bit to the new Bandai Gashapon place and I bought a few stuff. I specifically bought my friends an aespa-themed gatcha ball-thing and then went back to the office to do some cleanup tasks and stuff. In the afternoon, my seatmates and I accompanied another coworker in buying a phone. They wanted to buy a cheap budget phone for TikTok and I just accompanied them while joking around with the others. It was pretty fun, we had a few some jokes like our coworker’s salary being revealed and how they got scammed for purchasing the phone by financing it. They actually had to pay more for the phone than with a cash payment because they financed it, and we mostly found it funny. But after all that, we went back to the office and I wrapped a few things up at work for the day. Booking a ride home today was a total pain in the ass and took me 2 hours or so to get a ride home. It was the worst and I couldn’t believe that booking a ride home took that long. But after that I played a few rounds of R.E.P.O. with my friends and Luan. It was pretty fun and we got through a few stages before finishing our game. After that, my friends and I got into a call but we eventually left because I had work the next day.

Journal entry for Wednesday, November 26th, 2025

Wed, 26 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

For Wednesday, I just called it sick at work and rested the whole day from a fever.

Journal entry for Tuesday, November 25th, 2025

Tue, 25 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday started with me sleeping for 10 hours straight. I was extremely tired from yesterday and I didn’t even notice how tired I was, I just felt it. For the rest of the day, nothing much actually happened and my friends didn’t talk to me at all the whole day. I was even annoyed because I could’ve just went out to the office today but I didn’t, per their recommendation. I hate that I followed it, but whatever. They didn’t respond so I just watched Rush Hour 2 (2001) but I couldn’t finish it because they eventually replied. But we didn't talk much after because I started having a fever and I just got rest for the entire evening.

Song of the day: NOT CUTE ANYMORE by ILLIT

I got Suede on my vinyl

Mon, 24 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I just got home from watching Wicked: For Good (2025) with my sister today and I just browsed on the Internet for a while before I got some rest, which wasn’t a lot since I had to go to the office today. I got dressed well and that new UNIQLO shirt that my sister bought me is pretty nice. I got to the office surprisingly on time despite booking late, and I started my day. For work, nothing much happened aside from me catching up with all of the things I have to do. I spent an alone day in the office today, too, which was nice. I got to eat alone, walk around the office alone, and eventually had dinner alone. I eventually decided to have dinner at Denny’s since I pass by the cats there often and I had a really surprisingly-good dinner. It was a breakfast diner, but I enjoyed the bacon-wrapped sausage-thing and I had the pancakes for take-out. While I was eating, ILLIT released their new music video and I watched it in the restaurant, which was a new experience. Also, the bill was super expensive, this went up to 1,000 Pesos, which, considering that I just got 2 blueberry pancakes and a sausage dish, was pretty damn expensive. I pay anyway and the waitress/manager-looking-woman comments about how cute my Cinnamoroll wallet looks, which was nice of her. After that, I booked a ride home and just wrapped up on my work for today before going on that ride home. For the rest of my evening, it was just me talking to my friends. It’s strange and I really wish there were better days ahead. I also really wished I had a person I could talk about ILLIT’s latest comeback with, but don’t, so I kind of fucking hate my current life.

Song of the day: NOT CUTE ANYMORE by ILLIT

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I got Suede on my vinyl
나의 동화책

I'm not cute anymore (Uh-uh)
I'm not cute anymore (Uh-uh)
안돼 no more, 강아지보단 난 느슨한 해파리가 좋아 (Uh-uh)
'Cause I'm not cute anymore

For Good

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal Mall

Sunday had me still staying at Starbucks 32nd Street, and what I didn’t expect that it was still open even past 3 a.m.! It was a total shocker because I remember the last time I stayed up late here, we were asked to go home as the store was closing. For some reason, it would continue operations until the next day. It was a total shocker to me, but a welcome one because I really just wanted to complete my mood calendar entries and catch up on a month’s amount of journal entries. By the end, I am glad to have managed to catch up and I published the entire collection of the entries since I last published them. I also got to do some productive housekeeping with regards to my site, too, so that was nice. By the end, I wondered if I should eat Army Navy since it was also 24 hours, but I figured that I shouldn’t eat large meals before sleeping, and it was already 5 a.m., so instead I just booked a ride home and went straight to bed. Coming home at 5 a.m. there was a very unique experience, though, and I enjoyed it. For the rest of the day, I mostly just slept and chilled through the afternoon. We got ready at 5 p.m. or so because I thought that our film would start at 6:30 p.m. We weren’t able to book motorcycles to Venice Grand Canal and we didn’t really make the 6:30 cut-off. That’s when I realized that the show actually started at 5:30 p.m., not 6:30 p.m. Big fucking mistake. So instead of just rushing there, I just enjoyed my cab ride there and booked us tickets for the next screening at 8:30 p.m. I had enough time to go to the barber as well and get my haircut, which has been long overdue because my hair is getting hot and irritating. I still felt sad that my hair was balding, but whatever, I’ll probably just get a transplant soon so I could have a full head of hair again. After getting my haircut, I tip the barber and then pay for it, and then eat with my sister after at Pepper Lunch. After eating, we watched the movie and I’m glad that our seats were still well-positioned, even though we were off to the right side. It felt nice to just recline and watch Wicked: For Good (2025). The movie was nice, and I could see that my sister cried at some parts of the film. But I’m more surprised at how this movie tied in to the whole Wizard of Oz and even had Dorothy in some parts. So that was cool. After the movie, we went to a nearby Starbucks and thankfully it was still open, otherwise we would have had to book a ride to Starbucks 32nd Street, and then go home from there, but thankfully the one in Venice Grand Canal Mall was open and we had 30 minutes until it closes at 11:30 p.m. We had a little hiccup trying to order because their system was kinda slow and broken, but I’m glad I got to order **and** claim my 2026 Starbucks Traditions reward. I got the 24oz cup, which was pretty neat, since this is the 3rd year in a row that I’ve collected the cup. After that, we talked for a while and I promised my sister that I’d get her the entire Wizard of Oz book series. We eventually booked a ride home and I just relaxed and helped my sister buy the entire book series. All in all, it was a really fun day.

Song of the day: Multo by Cup of Joe

Journal entry for Saturday, November 22nd, 2025

Sat, 22 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

Saturday was the final stretch of my entire week of working the night shift and accompanying my friends throughout the night. I just accompanied them but they mostly slept throughout their entire shift. I was mostly focused on wrapping up my stuff and doing some work. After I timed out for my shift, my friends were still mostly sleeping. I just scrolled on Bumble to pass the time and saw the chats on Reddit that just died or tapered off. I was also weirded out by the girl that tried to tell me about how she stalked a guy that sat next to her on her jeep ride home and that guy was definitely her type. It was really strange that she wanted to make me that type of guy in her life **WHEN I AM GODDAMN SICK OF LISTENING TO EVERYONE ELSE’S PROBLEMS**. I seriously couldn’t stand it and I’m glad they got the message and didn’t reply further to me. I really, really hate being the receptacle to other people’s feelings, and with them being uncaring/inconsiderate of how I feel. Ick. Regardless, my friends eventually woke up around 6 a.m. or so. I accompanied them until 10 a.m. and we just talked about random stuff. I got some well-deserved sleep after that. For the evening, I decided on staying at Starbucks 32nd Street in order to catch up with almost an entire month’s worth of mood calendar entries. I waited until my sister cooked dinner for us and I had some dinner at home before leaving. Then I booked a ride to Starbucks and started a loooonnnnggg night of just catching up with my mood calendar entries. I also found a prospective website designer that Pat Q. recommended, so that was nice. I talked to them for a bit and gave them a basic run-down of what the design system I use has and then I focused on finishing my mood calendar entries.

Song of the day: Lonely Is the Night by Air Supply

Journal entry for Friday, November 21st, 2025

Fri, 21 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Friday started with me still accompanying my friends for our night shift work and I was just doing my usual round of Thursday stuff as well in the background. Nothing much actually happened, it was just our usual round of talking while working and I timed out from work eventually without issue. After that, my friends told me that they were frustrated with me because I never do anything and just complain about my circumstances, which kinda hurt because they definitely don’t see how much effort I still give to put myself out there and to better myself, but whatever. I just dismissed these statements. I also got Eternal Sugar Cookie in CRK, so that was nice. My friends also got pranked with AI by their friend and my sister got us coffee, so that was nice. I slept for most of the day and nothing much happened until I woke up in the evening or so and then it was the time close to my work again. But before that, my friends, Luan, and I played a lot of rounds of modded R.E.P.O. first and we tried out a lot of the new maps and saw a lot of new mobs added to the game. It was really fun and some of the maps were just cool to explore in. We had a lot of fun buying weapons and then killing so many monsters, even breaking a few of their life orbs in the process. It was fun and we eventually had to stop at this last Minecraft village state because there was absolutely no more stuff left in it. So we just logged off for the day and I just started my work. It was pretty serious on the get-go and I was just busy like usual. I eventually got into a call with my friends and we just had our usual round of talking and stuff until it got to the late evening where my friends got sleepy and eventually slept in the call while I did my work and other things.

Journal entry for Thursday, November 20th, 2025

Thu, 20 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Thursday had me continuing my shift from yesterday and I just accompanied my friends as usual since we’re both working the night shift this week. We didn’t do much aside from watch a few videos on YouTube which we streamed, and we played a bit of Cooking Run Kingdom together. In the morning, they showed her FRIENDS figurines from McDonald’s and it was cool that they has collected a few. I was also able to promote Mystic Flour Cookie today, so that was nice. For the rest of the day, nothing happened aside from me getting my sleep. In the evening, we played Peak and we finished the shore stage, but then it was the tropics today which was kinda boring. We were hoping to clear the new roots level today, but we couldn’t so we just moved to Phasmophobia. We tried out Nell’s Diner and played a few rounds for a while. It was nice but we moved to R.E.P.O. to try out a few new mods and at first it was a lot of trial and error. We couldn’t get into a game and that’s when I realized I have been running R.E.P.O. with the unmodded launch options. No wonder we couldn’t get into a game lol. I told them and they just sounded frustrated but also laughed at my sheer stupidity. It made for a very funny evening and we eventually got to go inside a game and play a few rounds with all the mods, which I kinda missed. After playing, our usual round of working and staying on call continued as the night went on.

Song of the day: Unwell by Matchbox Twenty

**** Sent you a surprise

Wed, 19 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

I was so bored this Wednesday. So I just decided to post something on Reddit about how I don’t have a date and that I bring my plushie to watch over my seat when I’m going to the bathroom. I got a lot of message requests from people and it was kind of overwhelming. It was the first time I got a lot of message requests and people wanting to talk to me. I tried to talk to a few of them in the hopes that I might actually meet someone interesting, but I just had so many people come in and send me messages. I couldn’t keep up but I was able to talk to a few of them, for what it’s worth. My night shift continues on and my friends shows me the Starbucks tumbler that I gifted her, which was nice. We also make this playlist of Korean Christmas songs that we know and they asks me to help with some of her work stuff. Eventually, I time out and I still accompany her and we stay on call just talking about random stuff. In the morning, they shows me her AirPods Max and they puts some stickers on it. I also get some wet food for Tanuki, and it was expensive as hell. It was 3,200 for wet cat food and I just shook my head in disbelief over the amount of effort I’m putting for this girl who won’t even listen to my problems lol. Shit like this is the reason why I desperately want to find a new person so I could start a new, better life with them, and actually go and be with a person who’ll appreciate my effort. But I still stay on call with her and they streams some Cookie Run Kingdom while we call. Eventually, our call ends and I get some rest before I’ll wake up again later today to attend dinner at Buffet 101. I eventually wake up and then book a ride to Buffet 101 where I’ll be having dinner for tonight. I’m glad I was at this buffet and had good food. My friends eventually invited me to play with them and Luan and they were just waiting for me. I booked a ride home after that and played with them. It was still fun, so I enjoyed my day. Lastly, at the end of the day, I received my 13th month pay. It was honestly the most surprising amount of money I had ever received in my entire life. I was just surprised, even though I wasn’t a stranger in getting more than 100K. But since my debt was more than 100K, I kind of felt sad that this wasn’t enough. I could have honestly used this money so I could treat myself and get on a plane somewhere, but instead I’m paying off credit card debt that I’ve racked up, and this still wasn’t enough. I just sighed and ultimately promised myself to get on that trip abroad next year. I started my night shift just fine as my night went on.

Journal entry for Tuesday, November 18th, 2025

Tue, 18 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday had me still accompanying my friends and we were just doing your usual round of work and us talking while in call. Nothing much really went on and my night shift ended just fine. For the rest of the day, I just chilled and got Jollibee for myself, and I even got groceries for my sister to cook. Eventually, my friends pulls me into a call and I got some McDonald’s as they got her dinner. We just chilled and ate on call while my work got started in the evening. I watched her stream some Cookie Run Kingdom, but that was it.

Journal entry for Monday, November 17th, 2025

Mon, 17 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

For Monday, I was still riding the high from yesterday’s Hatsune Miku Expo concert and I was still happy even though Ailysh and I were still at Starbucks S’Maison trying to get a ride. Ailysh was tired and was just sleeping but I was awake trying to get us a ride home. We took a while, but we eventually found a Grab ride home. We listened to a few songs once we got home, Ailysh also kept replaying her Miku Expo moments, but we eventually got settled in and got our rest. In the morning, I didn’t have work because I’ll be working the night shift later today and accompanying my friends. So I decided to make my time productive and went to Starbucks to go and play Hatsune Miku: Project Diva Mega Mix. I even bought Crossover just so I can play it on my Mac. I went to Starbucks 32nd Street like usual just so I could catch up on my mood calendar entries and make this day productive before I start work. I got there okay and I even got to play a few rounds of Sweet Magic before I started working on some journal entries. Eventually, Luan and my friends invite me to play with them and I told them that I couldn’t because I’m not at home, but I’ll try. They initially suggested Phasmophobia, but I haven’t downloaded it yet and the download would tank my data allocation so I suggested R.E.P.O. instead. Luan was down for a game but my friends didn’t respond anymore so we just figured that we’d play later. While setting up my stuff, I noticed that the woman next to me gave me candy and, before she left, she even offered me more candy. I don’t know why she was offering it, and I was too shy/awkward to ask her more or start a conversation, so we only exchanged a few words before they left. She was a total sweetheart and it was such a kind gesture, and this was the only ever “cool” encounter I had with a stranger in all my years of spending time at Starbucks. Eventually, I had to leave since it was already 3 p.m. and I didn’t want to get caught up during the rush hour, so I booked a ride home and I eventually found one and quickly got home. In the afternoon, I played R.E.P.O. with my friends and Luan. We killed a lot of enemies and even had a lot of money during this run. After that, we moved to playing Phasmophobia. We played a few rounds and then stopped playing after that. My friends and I got into a call and they showed me the Samsung Folder 2 that they got, and they even showed the wallpaper on it, which was a cute picture of Cinnamoroll. We watched a few YouTube videos after that and my night shift started. Nothing else noteworthy went on aside from me just doing work and staying on call with my friends.

Song of the day: Calc. (feat. 星乃一歌&日野森志歩&初音ミク) by Leo/need

Hatsune Miku Expo 2025 in Manila!!!

Sun, 16 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: MoA Arena

Today was finally the day! The day where I’d go to the first-ever Miku Expo in the Philippines! I am excited to watch with my sister and I’ve been waiting so long for this day to come. We’ve both been through a lot and this was just an extremely long journey but we’re here today! In the morning, we both did our usual stuff and just ate breakfast at home. My sister finally got to try that new electric stove I bought and they were able to make bacon and eggs with it. She cooked great and we just ate breakfast and also ate some of the bread. I enjoyed breakfast and we chilled for a while before leaving. For the afternoon, Ailysh left first and she quickly got a ride. I took quite a long time to get a ride for whatever reason, and I waited for almost an hour or something I even had a ride arrive, but then it started to rain and then I had to quickly get the laundry in, which didn’t take a while but the driver just canceled out of nowhere. They didn’t even call, try to send me a message, or anything. It was pretty weird and I just kept waiting for a ride to SM Mall of Asia just so I could catch up to my sister. I eventually got a ride after waiting and I got there fine, and it wasn’t raining anymore! When I got to SM MoA, I waited for my sister a bit and she bought a few stuff at Watsons. After meeting up, we went to Mendokoro because she’s never been there before. We see a lot of Miku cosplayers and we got a bit envious of some of the people there with the big Miku Expo shirts and stuff. We wanted to buy merch but we will once we finish eating. We quickly got a seat and enjoy some of the ramen while I charge my sister’s phone with my powerbank. I drink up A LOT of water and we finish our bowls, which was nice. We went to MoA Arena afterward and we easily got in with our tickets. The security lady took my water bottle, though, so it sucks that I’ll have to claim it later. But we got inside and my sister took some photos with a cosplayer that she knows and we wait in line to buy merch. We took a while and my sister goes to take pictures with a few cosplayers and she goes around for a while. I wait in line for a bit and it eventually took long enough and at some point we just gave up because it was 20 minutes until the show starts so we abandon the line and we went to get seated. We walked around until we found the correct entrance and we got in through the VIP area, which was pretty cool ngl. A security lady ushered us to the VIP seating and I was surprised to get a seat so close to the stage, but we were quickly moved back to the premium seats instead, which was still near but a bit away. It was so nice to get seated so damn close to the stage. We have fun and see the people around us, and the couple in front of us didn’t have proper lightsticks so they just used this JPEG of one and I downloaded the same photo as well for shits and giggles. # EVENTUALLY THE SHOW STARTED ON TIME AND I SAW MIKU HATSUNE ON STAGE It was so crazy. Everything about today was so crazy. I would have never believed that this day would come. I didn’t think that we would have a Miku Expo in the Philippines and that I would see Miku live. It was so hype and my mind was blown the whole time. I enjoyed the first few minutes and danced to some of the songs, even though I didn’t know them. Then Rin’s “Sweet Magic” came and it was a song that my sister and I both knew, and we danced along to it. It was super fun hearing the hit songs that we know and love from the Project Diva games and from over the years. We loved a lot of the songs and one of the main highlights was Luka singing. I thought she would sing Just Be Friends, but she sang Double Lauriat which I didn’t recognize at first, but it was so fun seeing Luka perform because she’s my favorite Vocaloid next to IA and stuff. There was a small break near the end of the concert and people were saying “mou ikkai” or something which meant “one more” and I was just stunned that the band had left off and then there was no message on screen and stuff. I kept thinking if that was it and I wanted 1 more song to play or them to load another video file or something. I wondered where the wowaka song was and I wanted Rolling Girl to play. Then the band came back and played a tune which led to Rolling Girl! It was so hype and all the memories I have in high school of playing Rolling Girl came back. It was seriously so fun seeing and hearing Rolling Girl play on such a loud speaker and Miku performing it live. It was such an experience and I loved every second of it. Overall, I enjoyed the whole Miku Expo experience. It was seriously unbelievable and I am just glad that I got to this part of my life. Eventually, Miku sang her last song which was Melt and I loved it as well. This whole concert was totally worth it and I wish there would be another Miku Expo soon. We left and I got my water bottle back, and another person gave out free stickers and stuff, which was pretty nice of them. On the way back, my sister and I were just soaking it all in and how the experience was for us. I couldn’t wait to play Project Diva when I go home and I was pretty hyped to play Vocaloid songs later. We took a while to book a ride home but we just chilled by the Starbucks at S’Maison and we charged our devices. It was quite a while and we tried to book with 9 apps all in all, and it took us a while to get a ride home. We eventually got a ride and I played Project Diva: Mega Mix for a while before we both got some sleep.

Song of the day: Calc. (feat. Hatsune Miku) by JimmyThumb-P

Journal entry for Saturday, November 15th, 2025

Sat, 15 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: SM Mall of Asia

For Saturday, I tried to watch an episode of House M.D. so I could pass out and I eventually slept after a while. When I woke up, I went down for the breakfast buffet but I had this feeling that I need to find the other room keycard soon. I did enjoy my breakfast, though, and I had some cereal as well as some meat, which were really nice. I talked to my friends for a bit and then told my sister that I’d be claiming the Miku Expo tickets today. I eventually finished eating and then booked a ride to SM Mall of Asia. I just waited and watched the music video for NMIXX’s Blue Valentine song, and my stay eventually ended just fine. I walked around a bit in SM MoA, and I eventually realized that they don’t do ticket claims in the department store anymore, so I went to MoA Arena to claim our tickets. After that, I had some lunch and I ate at this fancy Japanese-themed cafe that was near MoA Seaside. The omurice they had was great, and I liked the egg souffle-like omelette, so that was a nice taste. I’m just glad I got to have this job where I could eat all this and have these new experiences without worrying about the finances. And since I was already at SM MoA, I decided to watch Now You See Me: Now You Don’t (2025) because I wanted to watch it while it was showing in theaters. I booked a seat at the director’s club cinema and sat next to some unknown woman and I actually enjoyed the movie. I’ve been a big fan of Now You See Me ever since I watched it in high school and I’m glad I got to watch the latest movie, and it’s been around 10 years since they last released a movie. After that, I booked a ride home so I could get some proper rest and I just chilled at home and watched The Bear on Disney+ to pass the time.

Song of the day: Blue Valentine by NMIXX

Journal entry for Friday, November 14th, 2025

Fri, 14 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday would be another day spent at the office and I had a very usual day in the office. I had lunch out with my coworkers and we tried this “new” Mexican restaurant place that we always pass by but have never eaten in. So we just ate there just to try it out and it was pretty good. They had nice complementary nachos and me and another coworker split the bill for a pile of nachos that we couldn’t finish, but they were very generous with the serving. It was really nice and we walked back to the office after that. For the rest of the day, I just realized that my sister would go and sleep over with a friend. My friends was still at another house so I decided to just not accompany them since they were already at someplace else. I figured that this was the perfect time for me to have my own me time and I just decided to book a stay at the Midas Hotel & Casino for today and tomorrow Saturday. In the afternoon, my coworkers and I walked around Glorietta for our free time and we checked out some Japanese home goods before going back to the office and then timing out. I immediately went back to my house to get ready and I immediately booked a ride to Midas Hotel once I got my stuff ready. I got rained on while I was commuting home, but it was fine and I was able to dry out my shirt. I also decided to bring my MacBook with me on this trip. Eventually I got to Midas Hotel and paid for the security deposit, and then got settled in my room. I’m glad I brought my Mac but I kind of regret not bringing my Apple TV. The TV there was kind of old and it was just a dumb TV hooked up to a cable box that I couldn’t play YouTube on, so I just used my Mac to watch Smiling Friends. It was just weird that this was my room TV even though I had booked an “executive suite” which is supposed to be better than my Ardenhills Suites stay, but I guess it is what it is.

Song of the day: Bumalik Ka Na Sa'kin by Silent Sanctuary

Journal entry for Thursday, November 13th, 2025

Thu, 13 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was pretty stressful but fun! I woke up feeling acidic but I still pushed through it and booked a ride to work. While waiting, I played a bit of CRK and talked to my friends, but eventually I had to leave. For some reason, my commute today was so tiring and I arrived in the office feeling tired and a bit pissed off. But I really just needed water and I chilled down. For lunchtime, my coworkers teased me about joining them for lunch like usual but I still went with them and I got food from Pepper Lunch. They teased me about this cosplay pic I had because some of them haven’t seen my cosplay so I just showed it to them. After that, I stopped by the Tokyo Milk Cheese Factory and I ordered the biscuit with gorgonzola. They also teased me to get them Starbucks and I didn’t mind treating them, so I did. We went to Starbucks in SM Makati and I waited in the line and got their orders. I took a photo of this cute tumbler with a gingerbread man and I sent it to my friends because it reminded me of GingerBrave. I talked to her for a while and then the cashier gets our orders. They actually mess up my order and they give me 7 stars for it, even though it was only for 6 drinks. We had a bit of misunderstanding and I eventually get a 7th drink which was weird, but I got 8 stars in total so I’m not complaining. When we returned to the office, I tried to give away the last dark mocha drink but I couldn’t give it to anyone so it hurt my heart to just throw it in the trash. For the rest of the day, I had some free time so I talked to my sister for a bit and sorted things out with my mom. I also bought an electric stove and I buy that tumbler for my friends. I got both items shipped to their respective places because I didn’t want to bring them back to the office. And while it was a logistical nightmare and a total stress, I was able to get both items delivered. I still stay in the office and do a lot of extra work since I would just be waiting for my sister for the rest of the evening. I also have dinner with a coworker and we ate at Coco Ichibanya and I’ve been wanting to eat there for some time now, so that was nice. I eventually fetch her because she’s had just finished her last day at her current work and they had an event in One Ayala. We book a ride to her BGC office so she could drop off the laptop and then we go home together after what seemed like an extremely-long day. It was just Thursday but it felt like I had enough energy for Friday.

Song of the day: Leave Before You Love Me (with Jonas Brothers) by Mashmello

Journal entry for Wednesday, November 12th, 2025

Wed, 12 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

For Wednesday, I figured that it was finally a good-enough day for me to commute and work in the office, so I booked a ride there. My coworkers were there so I just had lunch with them and they teased me about accompanying them like usual, but I was able to accompany them and then I had lunch out with them. One of the team leaders also treated them out to Starbucks since they were collecting enough stickers for stars and I’m glad that they got me a drink. Work continued in the office for the entire day and I just focused on my tasks. In the evening, I had dinner out with my batchmates and it was nice to catch up with them and talk a bit about work and how it’s been since we last met up. I’m glad that we were able to have dinner and I was already timed out by then so it was a good use of my free time for the day. I booked a ride home in the evening and I even had enough time to get into a call with my friends as we watched American Horror Story. I accompanied them as long as I could before we disconnected as I had to go to the office the next day.

Song of the day: Blue Valentine by NMIXX

Journal entry for Tuesday, November 11th, 2025

Tue, 11 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I spent the day at home this Tuesday but I kind of regretted it because the weather was so nice outside. The sky was so blue which was extremely weird because a super large typhoon just came here a few hours ago. The weather was surprisingly picturesque and I just regret that I spent it at home. I did my usual work and chilled after timing out. I watched that new episode of Smiling Friends and tried to game using my Mac-Linux setup. Unfortunately, I had to play R.E.P.O. on Windows and I had to move to Windows because Peak didn’t work. R.E.P.O. was the only game we could play and we had fun playing, so that was nice. I played some Cookie Run Kingdom in the evening and went to sleep at around 10 p.m. or so.

Song of the day: Infiltrator by Nine Inch Nails

Journal entry for Monday, November 10th, 2025

Mon, 10 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Today I was mostly out of it because of the typhoon and I just used this time to get some rest because I couldn't go to work and the weather was pretty bad, too.

Song of the day: Multo by Cup of Joe

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Hindi na makalaya
Dinadalaw mo 'ko bawat gabi
Wala mang nakikita
Haplos mo'y ramdam pa rin sa dilim

Hindi na nananaginip
Hindi na ma-makagising
Pasindi na ng ilaw
Minumulto na 'ko ng damdamin ko
Ng damdamin ko

Journal entry for Sunday, November 9th, 2025

Sun, 09 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For Sunday, nothing much really went on and I didn’t plan on leaving today because the large typhoon would be in full force today. When I woke up, I had slept for 9+ hours or so and it was really raining outside. Since I had nothing to do, I decided to watch something to pass the time. I eventually watched Smiling Friends because of all the memes I’ve been seeing about it and it was a pretty good watch. I had a lot of laughs and some aspects of the show were genuinely funny. For the rest of the day, I was still bored so I decided to set up my MacBook as my main computing device for the evening. I tried to set it up on a stand, use clamshell mode, and hook it up via the ethernet jack. I spent more of the evening trying to stream my Linux PC to my Mac and I eventually got to a “working” state where it was good enough to play games on. I call that a massive success considering that the HDMI and peripherals are now on my Mac and my PC was just a big box with an ethernet connection. For some parts of the day, I talked to my friends and Luan on and off. I played Cookie Run Kingdom and sent my friends a few gifts but that was mostly it. We just talked for a while on Discord and I was mostly alone and playing music by the end of the day. I had nothing to do so I just kept integrating passkeys to my Mac which was mostly a success.

Song of the day: Meron Nang Iba (feat. Ashley Gosiengfiao) by Silent Sanctuary

Journal entry for Saturday, November 8th, 2025

Sat, 08 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

For Saturday, it started with me waking up a bit late to accompany my friends for their night shift. I had only slept for a while and I felt really, really groggy. I even thought twice if I should continue accompanying her because they asked if I was awake and said that it was okay if I had slept. But I was only 40 minutes late from waking up at that designated time. I mostly talked to her via chat for a while because they were still in a meeting but we got into a call eventually. Once we got on call, it was your usual affair of us talking and stuff. Nothing much happened aside from us talking and playing Cookie Run Kingdom. It was the longest Friday call we’ve been on, extending to around 1 p.m. on Saturday. I had to watch her keep buying a few things and playing Cookie Run Kingdom until they got Eternal Sugar Cookie and my friends were so excited, too. She eventually got Eternal Sugar Cookie and we left the call to do other things for the day. In the evening, I was bored and wanted to do something productive so I went to BGC to finally get my Coco Ichibanya curry. I was happy to finally eat it and it made me really full because the plate was just so big, I had to order the rest for take-out. After that, I walked a long way to my usual hangout at Starbuck 32nd Street. I did a few coding tasks there, mainly updating the packages for my website but that was mostly it. I didn’t have any screenshots from the past few days so I couldn’t write my journal entries for those. I eventually went home after a while and finally got some well-needed rest.

Song of the day: Billyeoon Goyangi (Do the Dance) by ILLIT

No way

Fri, 07 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday still had me crying and a bit hurt from what my friends said yesterday. Even though they still tried to cheer me up and make me feel okay by asking about the wallpaper, it wasn’t enough and remembering what LK said just made me cry more and more. My friends didn’t notice it that much, though and I just streamed some FNaF timeline video while they tried to watch and passed out. I watched the video the whole way through, so it was nice to catch up with the lore. I also got this massive headache which I wasn’t sure was from the crying or dehydration, but my head was hurting. After that, my friends eventually woke up for work and we stayed on call for a while before we disconnected so I could get some sleep. I couldn’t get sleep, though, and I just stayed up the whole night just doing random shit. I left my friends a message if they needed the money now but I just did other things to pass the time. In the morning, I decided to leave for work since the weather was nice enough. I booked a ride to the office and this was also the time where my friends asked me about why I cried and stuff, and I eventually told them everything once I got to the office. She seemed receptive enough, surprisingly, and said that they’d change even though they couldn’t be a safe space. I didn’t ask her to change, though, so I hope this was a genuine change coming from her heart and not just lip service. It was also nice seeing her type out a sorry and apologize, which I guess made me feel better. But I know for sure that nothing will change and our shtick will always be this one-way thing, but whatever. For the rest of the day, I chatted with her on and off, and I had my usual fun day of being in the office. My coworkers teased me using this AI-generated pic of me using Google’s Gemini. I had lunch with them and it took us a while to find a proper place to eat at. But we had lunch and I accompanied some of them in coming back to the office, but then I had to rush back so I could attend my meeting. My usual workday followed and it was pretty chill. I had to stay for a bit because I had a late meeting and I just did some work before leaving for the day. I haven’t got proper rest in 24+ hours so I just excused myself from calling my friends and got rest until the next day where I promised I’d accompany her like usual.

Song of the day: Blue Valentine by NMIXX

Cried for the first time in a while

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Thursday was the day we’d finally play the new Roots update in Peak! My friends, Luan, and I got into our usual call and played the new Roots biome for a while. It was so fun and a bit scary since we found out that there were zombies and this new fungus/spore status effect. We also found a few new items in the game like this checkpoint flag that my friends used because they were being chased by a zombie version of her. She also used this new Book of Bones item and they died shortly afterward because we bounced on this big mushroom trampoline thing. We couldn’t get past the new Roots biome at all, so we just played R.E.P.O. instead and we had fun playing a few rounds of it. We finally got the tea set in the museum loaded up for once, and we faced off a bunch of new enemies in the game. It was pretty fun and we learned some of the mechanics of the new Loom monster which we had fun with. We played for a while and then had to leave because we all had other things to do. My usual workday followed and I just did my usual round of tasks. Nothing much went on for my shift aside from a usual workday. In the evening, my friends and I got into a call and I shared my phone screen. I showed her a few stuff on my phone, mainly the Kidz Bop version of Tears and we watched a few visualizers from The Life of A Showgirl in the stream. I showed her this automation I had set up on my phone where I change the wallpaper automatically and my friends just flat-out rejected it and said that they didn’t care about it. Ouch, I was pretty hurt from it. It was a cool thing that I wanted to share and I just said that this was the reason why I don’t share much with her and I said that I’ll find other people to share this with. It really ticked me off and I instantly remembered how LK said to me that her boyfriend was her safe space and it made me immediately cry. It was such a big cry, too, and I haven’t cried for the past week or so. I put up with her so much and I genuinely try to give a shit even though I really don’t give a shit about some of her things like DotA 2. I just kept crying and crying, and we watched an Edvasian video and streamed a few videos while I was crying in the background. My friends didn’t notice it that much and I just made excuses like my foot sleeping or my nose being clogged when I was actually crying hard in the background. She did try to save the situation and asked me a few things about my wallpaper, like why I change it and stuff, but the damage was already done and they didn’t say sorry at all. We just streamed this FNaF timeline video at the end of the day.

Song of the day: C'est La Vie by B*Witched

Journal entry for Wednesday, November 5th, 2025

Wed, 05 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Wednesday was pretty fun and I stayed on call with my friends just playing and streaming my playthrough of Cookie Run Kingdom. I eventually got lucky and got an awakened form of Pure Vanilla Cookie, so that was nice. I stayed on call with her for a long time, until 4 a.m. or so. Which was a lot. But I eventually had to get my sleep and then time in for work as usual. For the rest of the workday, nothing much happened and I mostly just did my usual set of tasks until I timed out. In the evening, my friends, Luan, and I got into a session of playing R.E.P.O. and it was pretty fun facing off some of the still-new monsters and we were able to kill a few monsters, but around 11 p.m. or so we died and stopped playing for the day. After that, I just played some more Cookie Run Kingdom and got into a call with my friends that lasted until the next day.

Journal entry for Tuesday, November 4th, 2025

Tue, 04 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday started off weird. But ultimately, it wasn’t anything noteworthy and we just did it, which was nice enough. Eventually, my friends open up about deciding to leave or give me space because they noticed that I have been frustrated. They thought that if they stepped away, I would have time to find my new person and I just pointed out their hypocrisy in having another former lover in their life and still having them in their current life, while they want to push me away. Things were okay after that and they didn’t really move away or anything. Shortly after that, we were okay and then left the call. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened and I just did my usual round of work. I had a small dispute with my friends in the evening because I “accidentally” typed ”h” in our chat asking if we’re game and then my friends said that they were just waiting, but then it led to this argument that was quickly dispelled. But it’s just weird that bullshit arguments like this spring up from time to time. We were okay by the end, though, and we just got in a call watching scary YouTube videos. She also remarked about the song I was playing, so that was nice that we had a very regular call and conversation after all that transpired today.

Song of the day: By Chance (You & I) by J.R.A.

Lyrics that resonated with me:
You and I could be like Sonny and Cher
Honey and bears, oh-ooh
And you and I could be like Aladdin and Jasmine
Let's make it happen like

Journal entry for Monday, November 3rd, 2025

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

For Monday, it was the start of the month so I had to complete my days on-site once again. So I booked a ride to the office and decided to spend my Monday there because Mondays are pretty chill. So I eventually got to the office and saw one of my coworkers there on a Monday, which was weird since I thought they were scheduled on Tuesdays and Thursdays. But it was nice to talk to them for a bit before I just focused on my tasks for the day. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, I was just alone in the office and I had lunch alone. I had Pepper Lunch, though, so that was good. I just had a chill day and talked to my friends on and off throughout the day. I also had Sbarro and got to have that lasagna, so that was nice. I had it for take-out since I couldn’t finish it. In the evening, I got home and I played a few rounds of R.E.P.O. with my friends and Luan. It was pretty and we had a few mishaps, but I enjoyed our time playing. I continued accompanying my friends for a bit through their night shift and our day continued from there.

Song of the day: little monster by ILLIT

Journal entry for Sunday, November 2nd, 2025

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Lub d Manila

I couldn’t sleep and I’ve been staying up since the night before. But I couldn’t sleep at all considering that we would have to wake up early so Raul could go jogging and we could do other things in the morning. They eventually woke up at around 7 a.m. or so and we all get ready. I planned to just accompany Ange because Raul was going to go for a jog and run a few laps. I mostly just had a chill walk with Ange as Raul eventually ran off when we got to Ayala Triangle. We just took a few pictures and went inside a mall only to see that the Starbucks there wasn’t open. So we just chilled and sat for a while until Ange decided that we’d go back to the hotel so we could have some breakfast. We walked back to the hotel and Raul managed to catch up with us while we were walking back, so that was quick of him. We eventually manage to make it just in time for breakfast at the hotel. The cutoff was around 10 a.m. or so and we arrived at 9. I managed to get a few omelettes cooked for me, which tasted nice, and we had a breakfast buffet. It was pretty nice all in all, and we mostly talked about politics and other stuff before we had to go downstairs to prepare our stuff since we had to check out soon. We went back to our room and gathered our stuff before checking out and we also talked for a bit. But we eventually got checked out and walked to another nearby Starbucks in Poblacion. I got their drinks and just offered to pay for them, so that was cool. Another guy also came in the store and gave out free food and drinks to some kids on the street, so that was nice of him. For the rest of the day, I just went home so I could get some rest and finally chill.

Song of the day: The King of Wishful Thinking by Go West

Journal entry for Saturday, November 1st, 2025

Sat, 01 Nov 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Poblacion, Makati

Today was the day I’d meet up with Ange and Raul for our night out in Poblacion! I mostly rested for most of the day but, in the evening, I eventually got ready to meet up with them at Lub d Manila Makati. I got in and plugged my stuff in the room, and I just brought my iPhone and a few clothes with me. Eventually Ange arrives and has some food that they brought back from Modern Shang, and I tried some shanghai or something and it was really good. I also ate some of the Biscoff cookies that came with the room, and they also tasted pretty good. After a while, Raul eventually arrives and het sets up his stuff and we talk for a bit about work and life after KVH. Eventually, he tells me about his dating progress on Bumble so far and I got curious and a bit amazed at his progress. I mostly tell Ange and Raul my MO when it comes to love and intimacy and then they give me some advice regarding a few things. We eventually get ready to leave for our first stop for the night which was Rewind in Poblacion. We stopped by at 7-Eleven so we could get some money, and then we eventually went inside the bar. We mostly just talked about a few things from Raul’s experience in KVH and we also get some food and *pulutan*, and they also order a lot of drinks which I don’t finish because of my gout. I also don’t even drink a lot anyway, so I was just there to catch up with them, talk for a bit, and then chill. It got a little loud, though, and we couldn’t really talk much over the music, so we eventually left and then went to another bar. Our next bar was The Spirits Library, which was just nearby. We ordered a few drinks and they mainly gave me advice about my dating life, what I should do, and stuff like that. I truly believed that I was hopeless in the dating game but they still asked me to at least give it a try. I eventually got convinced enough to keep trying to look for a date and so I made a profile on Bumble. I even paid for a premium account. I tried out the app and placed a few pictures, but I still had it in mind that I’m definitely not going to meet this time around, just like with my other attempts. Raul also tells me of the cute server in this bar and why he primarily hangs out here to drink solo, which was cool. For this time, I would be paying for our drinks and I actually make a mistake because I paid twice and somehow had to spend 4K for this one bar, which was a total bummer. Ange also invites us to talk to the girls sitting beside us but I refused and Raul also didn’t seem interested, so we just waited and then drank out drinks before moving to our last bar for the night. Our last bar for this evening was Octopus and we just chilled there for a while. I was mostly focused on my Bumble profile but, in hindsight, it was a super waste of time and I should have just enjoyed my time with Ange and Raul. We went back to the room after a while and they mostly got some rest. I was too busy with my thoughts and I even wanted to write a blog post, but couldn’t since I didn’t feel comfortable typing on my phone at all. So I just spent the entire night just staying awake.

Song of the day: Blue Valentine by NMIXX

&FRIENDS Halloween

Fri, 31 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Okada Manila

Today was finally Halloween and the end of October. I’m honestly just glad that today was a holiday, too. I got to call someone in the morning and we hung out on Discord just talking and playing Cookie Run Kingdom. She opened her cam and showed me Tanuki and we just talked as the day went on since someone also had other plans today with her friends. I also had to get ready in a bit because I was going to meet up with Nicole and John at Okada Manila since we had a rave. Someone and I eventually ended our call and I rested for a bit more since Nicole and I planned to meet in the late afternoon-evening or so. In the evening, I got ready to go to Okada Manila and I met up with Nicole. I also ate alongside her and told her how I’m back with someone and she asked me how much I pay for it all and I told her the truth, and then we talked about her plans for the future. After that we left and she helped me get my ticket. Everyone was in their costumes and I felt a bit ashamed because I was just wearing some regular shirt. I also had a bit of a hiccup while claiming my ticket because I didn’t have any signal and I forgot to download the QR code for my ticket, so that was a massive pain. But it was fine, we eventually met up with John and his cousins that he parties with. We eventually go to the main stage and just listen to some music throughout the entire evening. Nothing else noteworthy happened after that, honestly. I didn’t know any of the artists that were playing, so it was all a surprise to me. I did know a few songs, but I was mostly sad seeing some of the couples kissing and having cute moments in front of me while I was just single and with some friends and a few strangers. I eventually booked a ride home after that and just got rested for the night because I had other plans for the next day. I also saw someone carry a small Bing Bong plushie just like mine! So that was super cute!

Song of the day: 360 by Charli xcx

Journal entry for Thursday, October 30th, 2025

Thu, 30 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: St. Lukes, Bonifacio Global City

It was Thursday and I was still at St. Lukes with my cousin watching over my sister. A few medical personnel come in the room and, to my surprise, it was my former classmate Kiara! It was seriously the most mind-boggling thing I have ever seen. It was such a coincidence to see an old classmate be one of the doctors overseeing my sister. It was honestly crazy because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. It was a crazy surprise, but at least it was a pleasant one. I talk to Kiara for a bit as she asks about my sister’s circumstances and they finish her check-up after that. I just sat in surprise for a while because I really didn’t expect Kiara to be a doctor to my sister. But eventually I was okay with it and I continued to stay up just to make sure my sister’s okay. My other cousins eventually come visit and replace my other cousin in the morning. It was really morning, like 3 a.m. or so, but I’m glad they made the effort in making sure that my sister was okay. We just wait and watch over her in the morning and I took a few pictures of them as well as my laptop. In the morning, I was able to spin up my own Jenkins instance and I wondered if I could shift some of my workload onto that server. I even wanted to expose it to the public so I could showcase some of my DevOps skills, but I read up online and did my research which just discouraged publishing it for the entire world to see. After that, I mostly just watched over my sister. Kiara came by in the evening to do some final check-ups on my sister and we caught up on a few things before her shift had to end and she had to go home for the day. It was cool catching up with a former classmate, so that was nice. I hadn’t slept yet and we were waiting for the main doctor to do a check-up and discharge Ailysh, but they never came. One of my cousins also had to go because they had other stuff to do, which just left me, Ailysh, and one other cousin. It was still nice to stay in the room even though it was too purple for my tastes. Also, my sister enjoyed watching House M.D. while on a hospital bed, so I’m glad she got to experience that. Eventually, I just had to force us to be discharged from the room so that we don’t occur other expenses. It was seriously weird that we weren’t given a proper notice that she could be discharged, but it was fine. I also had talked to my day and he said that he would be shouldering the medical costs, so that was nice because I absolutely did not have the money to cover whatever medical bill comes out from this, which is kind of an extreme fault on my side. Adding to the fact that Ailysh’s HMO and PhilHealth wouldn’t cover any of this. Today just felt really weird and it added to the fact that the payment system somehow went down in the afternoon and I had to wait for a bit more and then go to the main payment office. Thankfully, our dad covered the bill and it really was pricey for this very short stay with not a lot of operations. But I guess that’s St. Lukes for you, and I’m ultimately glad that my sister was fully okay. I paid for the bill after my dad sent the money to cover it, and I took care of some things so that Ailysh could be discharged this night. We also ate at Mary Grace in the ground floor to celebrate in a way. After that, we booked a ride home and Ailysh would have to go home and then pack her stuff so she could stay over at her boyfriend’s house and I could get my well-needed sleep. I just couldn’t wait to get my well-needed sleep after such a stressful 48 hours. Even this whole experience was kind of bad, I’m glad that there were a lot of things that helped make it okay enough.

Song of the day: Who's Holding Donna Now? by Rhythm Of The Night

Journal entry for Wednesday, October 29th, 2025

Wed, 29 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad
Significant Location: St. Lukes, Bonifacio Global City

For Wednesday, I didn’t really do much aside from check on my sister after my call with someone and her boyfriend told me to check up on her to make sure she was asleep. I messaged her boyfriend and told him that he should visit us in the morning and look over Ailysh. In the morning, I got woken up by my uncle and I was told that Ailysh had to be rushed to the hospital. I booked a ride to St. Lukes because they had just been admitted to the ER there and I got there quickly enough in the morning. I got inside and it was like a maze navigating to the ER. It wasn’t obvious so I had to wait for my aunt to get to Starbucks and I met up with her. Then Ailysh’s boyfriend meets up with me there and directs me to the ER where he’ll swap with me to watch over her because only 1 person is allow to accompany ER patients. I eventually meet up with Ailysh and she tells me she’s tired of thinking about the future which just sounds heartbreaking. I saw her hooked up to a machine that monitors her vitals, so that was cool like in House MD. I stand by her and watch her have a few operations done on her, but it wasn’t that big, just a bunch of small diagnostic tests and monitoring for her vitals. I eventually meet up with my other family members Shannen and Hanna and we take turns in watching over Ailysh. We eventually reconvene in Starbucks and even get food in the afternoon. We just walked to Burger King and then ate a few burgers. After that we mostly just wait for the doctors to evaluate Ailysh’s condition because we weren’t sure if she’s going to be admitted or not. But she eventually was and it was another long wait for a room. In the meantime, I just tried to be productive by studying up on Jenkins and spinning up a new instance of one of my servers so I can install Jenkins on it. Eventually, Ailysh’s friend Thea meets up with her and they talk before we escort Ailysh into her room. For the rest of the day, I just charge up my devices and for Ailysh’s devices, too. Another one of my cousins comes over to help check up on Ailysh and it was nice to see Ailysh just get a lot of rest.

Song of the day: Year 3000 by Busted

Journal entry for Tuesday, October 28th, 2025

Tue, 28 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For Tuesday, I had the longest time asleep in such a long time. I had 10 hours of sleep. I think it’s mostly because I have been sleep-deprived for the past week so badly and I didn’t give my body enough time to properly rest. But I’m glad I got enough sleep today. I just had my usual shift today and I helped organize getting someone’s Malteser’s bucket. I eventually had it shipped to my sister’s office and she had to get it. She eventually went home early today and she just stayed at home for the rest of the day. I had some meetings that stretched into the evening, but it was fine because I eventually finished up just fine. For the rest of the evening, I finally tried out Cookie Run Kingdom because someone was suggesting it to me for a while now. I also got into a call with them and we watched some YouTube videos, mainly from Becauseimmissy. I played more Cookie Run Kingdom for the rest of the night. I also checked up on my sister after my call with someone and my sister’s boyfriend asked me to check up on them, but I just checked and they were just fine sleeping. I just asked them to come over in the morning since I had other plans for tomorrow. I shortly got some rest after that.

Song of the day: Perfect Strangers by Jonas Blue, JP Cooper

Journal entry for Monday, October 27th, 2025

Mon, 27 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For Monday, I couldn’t get some sleep so I just stayed up all night. Nothing much went on throughoStardew-esqueut someone and I did play some Sky in the afternoon, which was nice. In the evening, we watched a few videos on YouTube, mainly from Smosh where they read some spooky stories. They also showed me this Stardew-esque game on Steam and then we watched The Woman in Black (2012) for our horror movie night. The movie was pretty nice and it had a bit of some supernatural ghost stuff, so that was pretty scary.

Song of the day: check by bbno$

Journal entry for Sunday, October 26th, 2025

Sun, 26 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I started Sunday by continuing my Tron movie marathon from yesterday. I watched the first Tron movie and, while it was nice, it felt too dated and really was a product of its time. The pacing felt super slow, but it was ultimately okay. I watched my favorite, Tron: Legacy, after and it was still so cool. I loved watching it on my MacBook screen, so that was a nice experience. I eventually got some well-needed rest after that. For the rest of the day, it was pretty boring but I enjoyed my time trying out Instagram’s new draw feature. I sent a lot of drawings to my friends, which was pretty funny. In the evening, I my sister and I ate Bonchon for our dinner.

Song of the day: check by bbno$

Journal entry for Saturday, October 25th, 2025

Sat, 25 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: SM Mall of Asia

For Saturday nothing much happened aside from me still accompanying someone throughout their entire night shift. We watched a Dan and Phil episode to round off the day, so that was nice. We eventually left the call after that. Naomi and I planned to meet today and we planned to meet at SM Mall of Asia. We met up in the afternoon and took a few pictures upon meeting up. She was wearing a timey dress, which looked nice. We walked for a bit to Starbucks S’Maison to just chill and talk for a while. I had Naomi take a few pictures with my MacBook and we eventually ate at Mendokoro near SMX. We mostly talked about Naomi’s relationship and how that’s going for her. It’s nice to hear her be with someone that likes her and shows her affection, even gifting her a bouquet, which was cute to hear. We eventually get a seat inside Mendokoro and then ate for a while. It was her first time trying out the chashu ramen, it was cool to help Naomi try it out. We still had a lot of food by the time we felt full and unfortunately they didn’t allow take-out so we just had to leave them. Naomi mostly felt like she wasted food but I did tell her that we’ll try it again in the future. After that, we just walked around for a bit and I gave her a small bottle of my perfume. For the rest of the day, I had to hurry to the cinemas so I could buy a ticket to watch Tron: Ares in IMAX 3D. It was really nice to finally have the time to watch it and I had a lot of fun watching it in 3D even though I missed some parts in the beginning because I got there late. Still, it was nice to watch it and I liked just being able to appreciate the move a second time. I went home playing songs from the soundtrack and even continued to have a Tron movie marathon.

Song of the day: Infiltrator by Nine Inch Nails

Journal entry for Friday, October 24th, 2025

Fri, 24 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

For Friday, I got bored working the night shift and not really doing anything extraordinary or anything at all. Someone took so long to get in a call with me and nothing was happening so I just figured that I could go to Pares Retiro and play hooky for a while. So I booked a ride to there and on my way there, someone messaged me and then eventually invited me to a call with them. I just made up this lame excuse that I was in a really long meeting. I quickly ate and I didn’t know that it’d rain, so that kinda sucked. But I eventually got to get my food and it stopped raining. But on the way back, the traffic was so heavy and it took me around an hour or so to get back. I eventually was able to return with no issues, but damn, the commute was a pain. But I’m glad I got some food for take-out and I eventually made it home without issue. Eventually my shift ended and I continued to have a normal day. Until the afternoon someone teased me about getting them expensive cake which was kind of super off considering I already give them thousands in cash for free. But eventually we were able to make amends with each other and I got a few tears from it because I really do hate my current life. In the evening, we got into our call like usual and then I continued my night shift. I also gave them the money by then.

Song of the day: 5 Years Time - Sun Sun Sun by Noah And The Whale

Journal entry for Thursday, October 23rd, 2025

Thu, 23 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Thursday kinda started off weird. But all in all, it was okay, I continued through my night shift just fine and in my break I got to play Sky with someone and we did our daily quests. I also bought the season pass for the both of us so here’s to hoping that we would eventually play through the whole season. We quickly logged off after we completed our dailies and went back to our separate jobs. Our call continued until the morning and I even had to treat them out because they just felt so down in the dumps. We ate food and just talked in the morning or so. We talked about a lot of stuff over the night. I also had the chance to tell them that my motivation these days is to just build a family for myself and eventually get to “that day.” We kept calling until someone had to do a test that took 15 minutes and I passed out by then. I noticed that she eventually left the call and I took that time to get some sleep. I slept uncomfortably for the rest of the day. I woke up in the late afternoon JUST IN TIME for my meeting. I literally just woke up 10 minutes before the meeting and my room was hot as hell, but I’m glad I got to attend the meeting and steer the discussion. After that, I just started my day and it wasn’t that eventful. I watched House M.D. on and off for the evening and I found one episode interesting. There was this girl who blogged every moment of her life and I found myself resonating with her because we both share our lives online for everyone to read. So that was cool. I also got lemonade with my sister for take-out and it was nice because I think we have a new favorite store now. The lemonade was really cheap, too. For the rest of the evening, nothing much happened and I just watched House M.D. and continued working my shift as usual.

Song of the day: Easy On Me by Adele

Journal entry for Wednesday, October 22nd, 2025

Wed, 22 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Wednesday started with me and someone continuing both our shifts. We mostly just called and talked as we were both doing work, it was pretty chill on my side as nothing much happened in my shift. We watched The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021) and it was pretty average and I doubt either of us were invested in it by the end, though. Someone even asked what the artifact was by the end and I told them that it was that thing on the table, which kind of proved that they weren’t fully watching. But it was fine since I wasn’t watching either and just downloading ILLIT photos, and maybe someone was busy with her work as well. Around the morning, they mostly opened up about their plans for a Winx club costume for their Halloween thing. It was nice but I didn’t get too involved in them sharing about it because I wouldn’t see them for Halloween anyway and I doubt I’ll see their costume, so I was kind of droning out by then. I was getting sleepy as well, and thankfully someone had her shift end and we both got out of our call to sleep. I didn’t really have a good rest and it was even interrupted by my sister making me food, but it was fine. I kind of had a hard time sleeping because I was so tired but I just ate Pancit Canton so I had some difficulty sleeping. When I woke up, it was already 5 p.m. and I felt horrible, but I just did my usual stuff and ordered take-out for our dinner again. I had some free time to play Phasmophobia with someone and Luan again, and we got wrong ghosts off of the calls I made, so that was disappointing. Someone left to rest for the evening because they weren’t feeling okay, so I just let them be and focused on my own things for the rest of the day.

Song of the day: Back for Good - Radio Mix by Take That

Journal entry for Tuesday, October 21st, 2025

Tue, 21 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today started with me continuing my night shift, I was mostly finishing my tasks and still continuing what else is there to do at work. I got bored at the tail end of my shift so I mostly just watched House M.D. as nothing much came in for work anyway, so I just chilled for the remainder of the shift. By the time the shift ended, I immediately went to sleep and got my 8 hours of rest. When I woke up, I was mostly glad I got my 8 hours of rest and I was glad that I felt okay from the gout. It wasn’t that bad today so I just took some light doses of my medicine. Someone also woke up and felt okay enough to voice call so in the afternoon we just watched The Conjuring (2013). It turns out that we both haven’t watched the movie so it was a nice watch about demons and ghosts. I was surprised that we both haven’t watched it, despite it being super famous and that we’re both horror movie enthusiasts. But we liked it and we continued our horror movie watch session by next watching Longlegs (2024) into the evening. The scenes were longer so I kind of found myself zoning out and I think I noticed it in someone as well that she wasn’t paying that much attention to it. It was definitely much more gore-y for my taste and I didn’t like it that much due to the killings and gruesome murders. But thankfully the plot was easy enough to understand and it was all explained in the end. Someone and I both finished it and she asked me which did I prefer between the two. She answered The Conjuring and I had the same preference. For the evening, I ordered take-out for my sister and myself. We got Bonchon and I mostly ate that as my night shift started. I had a lunch break to finish eating and we watched The Conjuring 2 (2016) and we both liked it, it was pretty okay. We paused the movie to continue it later on our downtimes. But we were both in voice call and we had our call continue to the next day.

Journal entry for Monday, October 20th, 2025

Mon, 20 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

For Monday, nothing much really happened as I just started it off by browsing the Internet until I fell asleep. Since I was working the US shift for this week, I didn’t really wake up on time but I was glad to have slept a full 8 hours. For the rest of the day, nothing much really happened and I was mostly by myself since someone was feeling sick and was recovering. We didn’t really play any games nor get into a call like we usually do. The rest of the evening was uneventful as I mostly just did my job and focused on my other tasks. I got bored so I mostly passed the time doing random stuff and watching House M.D. in between. I talked to some of my coworkers and they asked me if I was working the night shift this week, so that was nice of them to check up on me.

Journal entry for Sunday, October 19th, 2025

Sun, 19 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

I didn’t really do much for Sunday, to be honest. I continued eating the take-out we ordered and then I stayed up for a few hours. After that, I mostly just slept in the morning but I got my 8 hours of rest. I also feel like I have another gout attack today, which sucks. For the rest of the day, I didn’t really do much other than browse the web and update my mood calendar. I caught up on my mood calendar, thankfully, so that was nice. In the evening, I treated my sister to take-out because she cleaned a lot of stuff. I talked to someone on and off throughout the day and I also sent messages to our group chat with Luan but that was the most of it. Someone was feeling sick so we didn’t really get to play and I just told them to get some rest so they could feel better. For the rest of the evening, I mostly didn’t do much aside from wonder what else to do with my life.

Song of the day: Cupid - Twin Ver. (FIFTY FIFTY) [Sped Up Version] by FIFTY FIFTY

Journal entry for Saturday, October 18th, 2025

Sat, 18 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: BGC

Saturday started and continued with me being in a call with someone and we just talked about random things while they just did work. I didn’t really do or say much and nothing really noteworthy happened for most of the call. They slept at one part of it while I was just browsing IG Reels and they woke up from one video of an old lady saying “this is sucks” which was funny. We stayed on call until someone had to go and we eventually left the call after that. I got some sleep before I would head out with Exavier later this afternoon. I just woke up and just chilled before leaving. I got to BGC just fine and met up with Exavier. But we just walk around after that, and I initially decided on eating at Chili’s. Then I thought that it could be expensive for the both of us so I settled on the old reliable Samgyupsalamat in The Forum so we could eat until we’re full and also have a chat. We ate there and a few songs from my K-Pop groups were played, and we mostly continued the talk of where Exavier was going and what his plans for the future are. We eventually felt full enough to leave and we walk for a bit to Yi Fang so we could buy some milk tea. I paid for Exavier’s drink and we also walked around to try this Japanese honeycomb ice cream that Exavier treats me to, which was cool. We found a park bench nearby to just talk on and we just talk a bit more for a while. Then we try to go to Datablitz nearby but we couldn’t go inside because I was trying to finish my drink. We went back to the picnic table and I show him some pics I have from our time from KVH and it was nice to look back at them, I also showed pictures and we talked about how I brought Pat and Kat together that one time, which was funny. After that, I finished my drink and we went inside Datablitz to take a look at a few things. I saw the infamous OceanGate controller and took a picture of it, after that we just looked around for a bit and then we left to go home separately. When I got home, Exavier messaged me and then I showed him how some of my website’s code worked. We talked for an hour more about some programming and JavaScript stuff, and then we left the call to do other things. I mostly just rested and slept for the rest of the evening, but my sister and I also ordered take-out around midnight or so.

Song of the day: Topping by ILLIT

Journal entry for Friday, October 17th, 2025

Fri, 17 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today started with me still accompanying someone and watching her stream a DotA 2 match between Team Heroic and Team Liquid because Tofu was there. We watched the entire match and I’m surprised that the team I rooted for, Team Heroic, won the match. It was kinda cool to watch a tournament, so it was alright. I left to sleep afterward and got some rest. For the rest of the day, I just had work and I was incredibly busy. I don’t really recall what happened but it’s just me doing my usual round of tasks, which eventually ended and my work for the week was done. In the evening, I got into a game of Phasmophobia with someone and Luan. We completed a few rounds and our main objective was to just get a lot of perfect investigations. I keep getting killed a lot, but it was fine since I could take it and have them level up. We get a few perfect investigations under our belt, so that was nice, and we eventually left the game. For the rest of the evening, I just accompanied someone for their night shift.

Song of the day: Toki Yo Tomare by ILLIT

Journal entry for Thursday, October 16th, 2025

Thu, 16 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Thursday started off a little boring because someone couldn’t watch a horror movie yesterday and she says that she still wants to continue watching Talk to Me (2022). They couldn’t really wait for me so they pushed through with watching it and I went to sleep because I had on-site work in the morning. I woke up relatively okay and things were pretty normal. I’m glad to have today as my last day in the office for the month, so I was kind of psyched. I got ready and booked for a ride to the office and my usual, boring day followed. I didn’t spend lunch with my coworkers today because they had a team lunch with other higher-ups so I just had lunch by myself. I didn’t really do anything extravagant and I was just mostly immersed in work for today. Still, it was nice to just have a breather and do some work in the office. For the rest of the afternoon, I didn’t do much aside from just doing work. A coworker invited me out and we got dinner at El Pollo Loco in Glorietta. We talked about policies and a few other things, but that was mostly it. Some of my coworkers talked to me to give me the remaining beef jerky, but that was mostly it. I went home after that and it felt nice because I didn’t have to work on-site anymore. In the evening, I finally got home and I played Yapyap with someone and Luan. It was a pretty fun game, we had some fun learning some of the spells and playing around with the new wands we unlocked. As with the start of any new game, we mostly just played around and didn’t really get the game mechanics in the first playthrough. We really didn’t meet quota and kept failing, but it was all fun and good. We moved on to Phasmophobia to explore some of the Halloween maps and we got a few good rounds where we guessed the correct ghosts, so that was nice. After that, we left the game and I mostly just accompanied someone for the evening. We tried to watch Bring Her Back (2025) but it was too disturbing after the kid rammed a knife in his face. Extreme, realistic gore wasn’t really our thing so we passed on the movie and just talked for the evening. She showed me her new hair sticks and our call continued to the next day.

Song of the day: Toki Yo Tomare by ILLIT

Journal entry for Wednesday, October 15th, 2025

Wed, 15 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I still stay on call with her for a while, and I eventually tell her a few things that I’ve been feeling. The conversation gets somewhat deep into topics about my personal hardships this year. I guess part of me feels a bit pierced because the stuff I help out for isn’t for my own “family” i.e. for my wife and kids, and I do tell someone that it’s kind of sad to just go home from work every day and to not come home to a loving wife and kids. Someone was supposed to interject and say that we watched a movie but yeah she agrees that it isn’t the same as having a wife and kids, which was just funny to me. We talk for a while more about other topics until she gets busy in a work call and asks if I want to go and leave the call, to which I do and I just get some rest. For the morning, it was just a hectic commute to the office and I immediately got ready as soon as I wake up. I booked a ride to the office after taking so long to get a ride. We go through BGC into Makati and it was nice to pass by an IMC school service van, which kind of reminded me of my childhood and made me miss it a little. I eventually got to work fine then had lunch with my coworkers shortly after and they teased me that I should just not join them and that they should just chat each other for lunch and then leave one by one, but I just laughed at it. We had lunch at Glorietta’s food court nearby and we saw that the new Burger Beast store has opened. But I just had food from Mesa Steak Sizzlers as usual. I also got an expensive coffee from Nitro Brew because the cashier lady said good afternoon to me and I couldn’t just ignore her so I bought a drink. I eventually got my food and so did my coworkers. We mostly talked about the recently-opened Burger Beast restaurant that opened here. After that we eventually head back to the office and I continue on with my work stuff. Once we got back, the rest of the afternoon continued. I was prank scared by a coworker who has finished their shift and another coworker also shocked me by touching my back, which made me scream quite loud because I was so focused on my screen and I didn’t expect anything touching me. My coworkers in front of me laugh. For the evening, I just catch up on a few tasks and I got invited by coworker and another coworker to have some ramen. We eventually get there and have ramen. We eventually head in and I ordered a *tantanmen* for my dinner. We just talk about the skins and games one coworker has played and during our dinner, someone invites us to play Phasmophobia and Luan also messages that I’m still at work. I eventually tell someone that I’m going to commute home after dinner and our dinner was surprisingly quick. I booked a ride home and thankfully the driver went through BGC. I got home relatively quick and I immediately headed to my PC to play Phasmophobia with someone and Luan. We had a few fun rounds of Phasmo, but I often kept dying. There was that first round where someone’s audio device wasn’t working and she thought that we were ignoring her. She pulled all of the cards in the tarot card deck and that led me to being killed, but it was kind of fine even though we got a few ghosts wrong. Eventually Luan has to head out and someone couldn’t call because their brother was in the room so I just did stuff on my own and update my journal until the next day started.

Song of the day: Opalite by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Don't you sweat it, baby, it's alright
You were dancing through the lightning strikes
Oh, so sleepless in the onyx night
But now, the sky is opalite, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, my Lord
Never made no one like you before (No)
You had to make your own sunshine
But now, the sky is opalite, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Journal entry for Tuesday, October 14th, 2025

Tue, 14 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Tuesday ended up being pretty boring but peaceful. It was the first night in a while where I got a full 8 hours of rest, so that was pretty fun. But when I woke up, I still felt pretty tired. I talked to someone on and off while getting a ride to the office. Work started for me in the office and I just did my usual round of tasks when I got invited by my coworkers to eat with them for lunch. We ate at Marugame Udon and I got 2 pieces of tempura when I was only supposed to get 1 piece. I also got a lot of side dishes, which I thought was excessive until my order took a while so I just ate them while talking to my coworkers about the many natural disasters and earthquakes recently. It took a while for my order to arrive but I eventually got mine and got to eating, and my coworkers also noted that my food looked nice, so that was fun. Eventually, we were finished eating and we walked for a while and I went to Happy Lemon for to grab a drink. I eventually got one and we went back to the office after that. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened aside from one coworker leaving early. I eventually book for a ride home in the evening. The rider took the long road again home and it made the trip super exhausting. I hated the trip home and I really hate getting stuck in traffic. Eventually, I made it home and I got in a call with someone. In the evening, we watched Identity (2003) which was pretty much another mindfuck movie that we liked, and it also revealed a major plot point early on, so that was interesting. After that, we watched The Eye (2002) and we had differing opinions on when we’ve watched it, because I distinctly remember us watching it when we did a work together thing in SM Sucat, but she recalls another time, at SM North EDSA while we were standing in line. We eventually watch the movie but stopped while we were early because she knows I’ve already watched the movie. She told me to find another movie for us to watch, one that we both haven’t seen, so I decided on Talk to Me (2022). I play that movie and she falls asleep sometime afterward and I didn’t disturb her so she could get some sleep. The night continued on as we stayed in the call.

Song of the day: Punkrocker (feat. Iggy Pop) by Teddybears

Journal entry for Monday, October 13th, 2025

Mon, 13 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

My day continued from yesterday and someone and I got into a call. We talked for a while about just random topics and life but eventually she passed out while on call and I disconnected her from the call. I couldn’t sleep after that so I just spent the remaining time just staying up and browsing the Internet. In the morning, I just ordered breakfast for myself so I could continue the day with good enough energy. What I ordered was nice and I followed that advice of starting the morning with some protein. I eventually had to book a ride to the office and eventually got there just fine. My day in the office was really a boring one, it was just me. But I kind of liked it since it was just me alone. I redeemed the Starbucks stars reward I have for this new coffee and so that I could stay up all day. I made the decision to spend some of November’s onsite days on a Monday so that there will be barely anyone in the office. No coworkers teasing me or what. And my day was just that, mostly boring and I had that feeling again that I should do more in my life, which frustrated me a bit. I talked to someone on and off about random stuff like Counter-Strike rankings and stuff. Eventually, my time to leave, but I just had to finish this AI course before I went home. I thankfully booked a ride home but the driver took the absolute worth path which made the trip 40+ minutes or so, and it was incredibly exhausting. By the end of the day, I was already incredibly exhausted but I still got into a call with someone. She suggested a few movies for us to watch. We first watched It’s What’s Inside (2024) and then we watched Heretic (2024) afterward. Both were pretty good, mindfuck films and I’m glad that someone recommended great movies for us to watch. I also downloaded Identity (2003) but we couldn’t watch it as we just watched random horror YouTube videos at the end of the night. She eventually said that I should sleep soon and I agreed so we disconnected from the call and I called it a night.

Song of the day: Toki Yo Tomare by ILLIT

Journal entry for Sunday, October 12th, 2025

Sun, 12 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I still felt super tired even though I had a full-enough night’s rest today. I just mostly passed time in the morning and then got ready to go out along with my sister for today. She would go to Market! Market! to put some tempered glass on her phone and I was going to my usual place at Starbucks 32nd Street to do some coding. I was just going to code there and it felt nice to just code since I’ve been catching up on mood calendar entries for the past few weeks there. But I just booked a Grab ride for the both of us and dropped off my sister first before I got dropped off at Starbucks. I got there and I got my usual white chocolate mocha and a blueberry cheesecake to eat. For the rest of the afternoon to evening I just focused on coding that Material 3 Expressive redesign for my main website. It was really productive and I mostly continued off of last night’s coding session. Eventually, I fixed a few things and added a new feature and did some code cleanup. I booked a ride home and talked to someone for a bit since she was still drinking at her mom’s birthday and stuff. I made a remark that drinking with her is something that we’ll never do. My ride home eventually arrived and I just napped for the rest of the evening. In the late evening, I woke up and still talked with someone and we continue it off for a while there.

Song of the day: Spanish Flea by Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass

Journal entry for Saturday, October 11th, 2025

Sat, 11 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

My day started with me still accompanying someone throughout their entire night shift because it was a Friday. I got food for them because they were going through a lot in life and I ordered some food as well. We talked about a lot of topics during this time but one I kept in mind was this question where I asked her why she wasn’t in any relationships right now. She told me she’s too selfish but she didn’t elaborate when I asked further. It was weird but I just tried to not mind it because I should just not care if they get into relationships or not, they’re not my priority and not someone I’m pining for. I signed up for a chess.com account and they tried to coach me in a game but it didn’t really work out and I lost. I’m not sure what caused it, but I started feeling that same sense of frustration because I didn’t feel like I was doing anything in my life. Someone just kept singing along to musicals and eventually shared her screen so I could watch her play some chess against this guy she’s working with. I also asked her what made her really get into chess since she’s been really into it recently and she told me that in our playthroughs of Outlast: Trials was when she got into it because they had chess in the player lobby. Eventually their chess match ends and someone and I disconnect from the call. At this time, I was already feeling frustrated at myself because today seems like such a good day outside and to be productive but my sleep is totally wrecked and I’m probably going to just sleep this day off. I tried to plan for going out today with no sleep but held off on it when someone asked me if I’ll sleep and I tell them that I plan to do other things instead. She tells me that she wants to play BioShock Infinite so I just watch them play the game for a while. They struggle with it a lot since it’s a first-person story game and the mappings were for an Xbox controller when she was playing using the PlayStation Dualsense controller I gave her last year. She eventually ends her playthrough for the day we got off call. My sister ordered food this time and we just eat some Andok’s for today. I ate and I just passed out shortly afterward. I didn’t even lock my room or turn on the AC because I was just that tired. My sister wakes me up in the evening so I could eat and I get up feeling horrible at 7 p.m. I think I barely slept because I woke up in sweat and my eyes hurt. I still have dinner and watch a YouTube video about the distant future of Adventure Time. I thought about leaving for the night to be productive and do some programming at Starbucks but I held off on it. I just programmed at home on my Linux PC and I was able to make significant progress so I capped off the programming for the day. For the rest of the evening until the following early morning, I just caught up on things I needed to do before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Sincerely, Me by Mike Faist, Ben Platt, Will Roland

Journal entry for Friday, October 10th, 2025

Fri, 10 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I started Friday by being on call with someone and we were just watching some K-Pop videos and she introduced me to a few songs from Laufey. I also showed her ILLIT’s First Take video, which she really liked so that was nice to see that she likes them. I also showed them a video from SMORZ that I liked recently. We kept talking for a while but we eventually had to go and disconnect from the call. In the morning, I started work and I had to bring in the laundry because it suddenly rained. I commuted to the office after doing some work in the morning. I was lucky enough to book a ride to the office but it rained super heavily on the way there. We got stuck in traffic and in the rain at some parts and my shoes as well as my clothes were completely drenched. It was horrible. The rain even got through the raincoat, but I personally didn’t feel much stress from it, just general discomfort because I got rained on. I still got to work just fine but I focused on my tasks first. In the afternoon, I mostly just focused on tasks and attended my performance review. I’m just glad that it was satisfactory and there are no major issues. I’m just glad to be doing well at this time because 2025 has been such a challenging year and it’s been literal years since I’ve been praised in a performance review and to have my strengths/good points highlighted. To treat myself for doing well, I got that 300g steak from a restaurant that I wanted to visit and it was really good, plus it was totally worth it. I mostly just talked and tried to console someone while eating. For the rest of the day in the office, it was mostly just me working and then I had *merienda* out with my coworkers for a while. We just ate nearby and I got a sandwich. My coworkers also teased me about the newhire which I still found annoying but I played along for fun. My coworkers went home first and I stayed for a while more in the office just doing tasks and finishing up stuff for the week. I got groceries afterward and I ordered and paid for some food in the food court, but they took such a long time to serve my food and my ride was here. I didn’t claim the food and instead just went to my ride where they talked a lot about their life and how they lived near my house and all. It was such a long story but I kind of didn’t feel like talking because I’m just exhausted after 4 days of working in the office. When I got home, I just cleaned up for a bit and placed the groceries in the storage room. I got into a call with someone and I accompanied them for their entire night shift since it was a Friday. The call felt long even though it was just the start so I knew I was in for a long night.

Song of the day: I want you to by SMORZ

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I want you to

Dance, wanna see your body move
Get up on your feet
Dance, dance
Put this song on repeat
And I can feel the rush to the sound of the beat
Can you feel it now?
Just dance all night, yeah

Journal entry for Thursday, October 9th, 2025

Thu, 09 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I had quite a bit of sleep today and my morning was usual but started very late because I was kind of tired from last night’s Tron watching. I still got to the office albeit a bit late and I just decided to make up for time in the evening. I had lunch with my coworkers after that and I just had some Pepper Lunch and some mushroom enoki from nineteen degrees. We went back to the office and something happened and I don't want to explain it further. Work continued and thankfully my coworker friend invited me out for dinner and I used it as time to leave from my seat and sit somewhere else. I’m glad that my coworker friend acknowledged that it wasn’t fully my fault and that it wasn’t something to argue over, so that was nice. We just ate at this sizzling plate stall and I was talking to someone about a lot of life stuff while this was going on. Someone eventually made me promise to give out a loan to them so they could buy their own farm when I’m ultra-rich or whatever. I still agreed and we kept talking, eventually telling her that she’s “someone” in my journal entries and stuff. I even shared them my future leap year letter, which they didn’t read in full and only for the few paragraphs. I went to dinner with another coworker again in the late evening because I stayed until 8 to finish this task. I just vented to them and they just told me that it wasn’t really a big deal, which helped calm me down. At the end of the day, I finished a major task and then I booked a ride home quick. I got home safe and I got on call with someone. We talked for quite a while on a lot of life stuff and she got bad news handed to them, which kind of put a damp on her feelings. I just treated them to some take-out and promised to help them out if things ever get so bad. We just watched K-Pop videos and some horror at the end, and I’m glad that they liked ILLIT’s performance of Magnetic on the First Take YouTube channel. I ended the day feeling way better because I got to open up to someone and discuss my plans for the future as well as open up about some things in my past that I haven’t shared to anyone.

Song of the day: Infiltrator by Nine Inch Nails

Tron: After 10+ Years

Wed, 08 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal Mall

Greetings, Programs! It’s been 10 years since I first watched Tron and I’ve waited for a successor to Tron: Legacy ever since then. That movie shaped my early teen life so much, it made me love computers, technology, and a lot of nerdy tech stuff so I’m glad to finally watch another Tron film. The day started out normally, it was just me spending time and talking to someone while in a call. She didn’t have Internet connection but we were still able to talk while I was eating my salad from Wendy’s. I eventually finished my food and eventually had to sleep so our call ended there. I woke up with a good amount of sleep, but it wasn’t the full 8 hour experience, so it was still lacking. I continue to go to the office today until the end of the week so I still had to prepare myself even though it was already raining. I just braved the rain and I thankfully found a ride. I was thankfully only a bit rained on and I’m glad the driver brought a raincoat. We passed by a section in our village that I’ve never been through before, so that was interesting. I got to the office fine, thankfully. Work today was fairly as usual as the other days but I spent lunch with my coworkers. I posted a lot of pics on my IG so I got to talk to Max, Naomi, Kai and a few other friends replied to my IG Story throughout the day so that made me feel way happy. I was super busy talking to them on my lunch break and even when I was waiting for my jasmine milk tea from this Thai milk tea place we visited, which was nice. I went back to the office and just focused on my tasks for the remainder of the day. Near the evening, we had *merienda* nearby and I just ate siomai and siopao and I was able to get a shawarma. I finished and completed a great deal of incoming tasks by the end of the evening and had some spare time sitting next to my coworkers while they were talking about DotA 1 when it was still in Warcraft. I didn’t play Frozen Throne but I saw the icon from when I used to use the PCs in Internet cafes. Eventually my shift for today came to an end and I booked a ride to Venice Grand Canal Mall. I got there fine but I didn’t know where to eat at, so I walked around for a bit until I settled on Mary Grace Cafe. I ordered beef… whatever from the breakfast menu, a mint hot chocolate, and a salad which was very filling. I went in the movie theater afterward and a lady personally walked up to me and took a picture of my ticket and told me that she would prepare my popcorn and drink, which I found weird. Then I went inside the theater and waited for a while only to realize one thing: ### I AM THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS WHOLE MOVIE THEATER FOR THIS SCREENING I genuinely could not believe it. No one else is watching this movie as me??? What the fuck? I have never had this happen to me in my history of watching movies at Venice Grand Canal Mall. There’s always at least other people. It’s just so baffling to see no one else here that I had to take a picture of the empty cinema and post it on my IG Story. Eventually the film started and I was just glad that I wasn’t watching a horror or ghost movie. The movie was pretty good! I kept looking at the commands they were typing on the screen and it’s so nice to recognize so many Linux and UNIX commands because of my DevOps experience. I found it super funny that one scene showed a Linux systemD command as well. I also kept minding the soundtrack because I loved Daft Punk’s soundtrack for the last movie and I could say that this movie’s soundtrack was pretty nice, too. I went home happy but also creeped out that I was the only person in the theater and the only person to go home from the cinemas. I booked a ride home and talked to someone on and off, but they seemed busy and more interested in talking about Travis Kelce’s exes than anything. Which I couldn’t get into and honestly found it disappointing because they didn’t seem interested in the slightest in what I thought of the movie. It kinda sucks that I had no one to share my enthusiasm about Tron for, but whatever, I guess it’s a me thing that only I appreciate. I replied to a letter on Slowly and did some light catch up on my other things before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Year 3000 by Busted

Lyrics that resonated with me:
He said "I've been to the year 3000
Not much has changed
But they lived underwater
And your great-great-great-granddaughter
Is pretty fine, is pretty fine"

Journal entry for Tuesday, October 7th, 2025

Tue, 07 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I tried my best to “lock in” and get my game face ready but I couldn’t sleep because I was still so bothered by what my friend said. I eventually thought about writing a blog post on how I just feel like I don’t feel connected to people anymore and I don’t believe in the strings that used to bound my heart to things. Someone eventually messaged out of the blue and I replied immediately which kind of shocked them because I was still awake. I told them that I was thinking of a few things and they surprisingly were open to listening to me vent, which was a total shocker for me. I eventually get my MacBook and got into a call with them. We talked for a while about my problems and I vented some things to them. It was kind of nice because it’s been a while since I vented to a person. They mostly sided with my friend and empathized them more which kind of wasn’t what I need but I appreciated the alternative thought. Part of me still believes that I’m right because I did tell my friend what I was going through and I didn’t get a “sorry, I didn’t know you were going through so much.” Someone and I talked for a bit more about other, lighthearted things before we left the call and called it a day. In the morning, I was still ruminating about what happened yesterday and I affirmed that my thoughts are valid. Everyone has shit they go through. Everyone has silent struggles. I went through my own and didn’t tell anybody, and I didn’t need a friend telling me “nothing’s changed with your situation.” I tried to sever the thoughts as I was getting to the office. I eventually got to work okay and it’s been a while since I’ve been back to the office. One of our seatmates has a newhire and one of my coworker friends immediately teased them to me. But we had lunch out together and just talked about upcoming performance evaluations. I went back to work and my coworkers kept teasing me and I kept acting my usual way when I get teased. But eventually work resumes and I get so busy with work. I hyper-focus on my tasks for today even though Tuesdays aren’t that stressful. I continue being busy until the evening but I took a pic of my work outfit for my IG Story and for Locket before continuing to work for hours. In the evening, I got some *merienda* and I booked a ride home afterward. Someone also tried to play chess with me on my commute home and her queen decimated all of my chess pieces until she won at the end. For the rest of the evening, I was on call with someone. I had fun talking to them and we joke around so many things like me being so picky yet not being that much of a catch. I pointed out my flaws and laughed at them as well. We tried to play Love and Deepspace but someone’s Internet got cut off and I had to give them mobile data so we could continue calling. We kept talking about Taylor’s relationships and I helped them out with their work at the end. We also ordered food separately and ate together, I mainly ate a salad from Wendy’s. After helping them out with their website, I did some catching up on my own things and got some sleep.

Song of the day: C'est La Vie by B*Witched

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'll huff, I'll puff
I'll huff, I'll puff, I'll blow you away

Say you will, say you won't
Say you'll do what I don't
Say you're true, say to me
C'est la vie
Say you will, say you won't
Say you'll do what I don't
Say you're true, say to me (Get a life!)
C'est la vie

Journal entry for Monday, October 6th, 2025

Mon, 06 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was kind of stressful and a bit irritating, not gonna lie. I didn’t get much sleep from last night because I drank coffee before leaving Starbucks at 10 p.m. so I was still kind of buzzed. I didn’t really do anything productive, but I just had this feeling of needing to be productive for no reason. I eventually passed out and went to sleep and I began my morning seemingly-okay. In the morning, I had some spare time to play R.E.P.O. with Luan and someone. We spent a few minutes trying out mods in R.E.P.O. but they didn’t work because of a recent update, so that sucks. We played Peak instead and we got through the shore, jungle biomes just fine. But Luan had an issue on the alpine biome while we were talking about the new Sora 2 AI videos. Luan eventually disconnected and someone and I were left to continue to the cauldron and kiln together. I died at some part in the cauldron due to lava and someone revived me at the kiln, where I died again because I didn’t really have much resources on me and the kiln seed was pretty difficult. I mostly guided someone through the kiln and gave her some directions. She eventually was able to reach the peak and we completed Ascent 2! So that was nice. For the rest of the day, work just started and continued on. A friend randomly messaged me in the afternoon and we talked for a while. They eventually told me that I’m not doing well with my finances and literally told me that my “situation still looks the same” and I was deeply offended. I didn’t need this kind of talk from anyone, especially since they don’t know how much shit I’ve gone through these past few months. It literally irritated me and was the main reason why my day turned sour. I HATE being told that my life isn’t getting better when I know it fucking is and I know how hard I’m trying. It’s honestly the most offensive thing someone can say to me as a person who fears and dreads stagnancy. It was disgusting so I told them off and I just left them on read because I don’t need friends like that. The rest of the day continued but I was already pretty pissed off at that point. Still, I was able to have good dinner and spent time with someone in a call before going to bed. We still mainly discussed Taylor Swift’s new album and we even played 1 round of chess before I went to sleep. I still enjoyed my day and the other people I spent it with made up for the difference, plus feeling productive at work and making some moves to change my life really helped at the end. I just felt this extreme feeling that I should fucking change my life. Like really change my fucking life, to run far away and to get so high away from this place. I even punched my bed frame because I got so frustrated at the end but I’m glad I felt this rather than complacency.

Song of the day: Chain Hang Low by Jibbs

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Do your chain hang low? Do it wobble to the flo'?
Do it shine in the light? Is it platinum, is it gold?
Could you throw it over your shoulder? If ya hot, it'd make ya cold?
Do your chain hang low?
Do your chain hang low? Do it wobble to the flo'?
Do it shine in the light? Is it platinum, is it gold?
Could you throw it over your shoulder? If ya hot, it'd make ya cold?
Do your chain hang low?

Journal entry for Sunday, October 5th, 2025

Sun, 05 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

I got my full 8 hours of sleep today and I woke up well-rested. It rained a bit when I woke up, but I decided that it won’t dampen my day. I also ate the leftover meatballs from my IKEA trip with Nathan yesterday. I was thinking of whether or not I’ll go to my usual place—Starbucks on 32nd Street in BGC—so I could do some work on my Mac. I didn’t want to spend this day at home anyway and I wanted to be productive so I brought my MacBook with me and commuted there. I also brought Bing Bong with me today to watch over my seat. I get there okay and I ordered that new cherry fritter thing along with the usual iced white chocolate mocha venti. This time I was able to ask for no whipped cream on my drink. I saw that the new pumpkin spice latte was already here and I kind of regret seeing it as my order has just been completed. Darn, maybe I’ll get it next time. I waited for a while at a table seat but thankfully someone had to leave one of the sofa seats and I sat there the whole time. I had a lot of mood calendar entries to catch up on and I haven’t journaled the important days recently, so I was eager to complete and fully catch up with all the entries I’ve missed. It took me so long to write my calendar entries but I eventually was able to fully catch up and prevent another pile up of entries to catch up on. It took me 5 hours or so to write and publish them all but I was totally happy by the end. While writing my entries I found a new song to love and I also played this new K-Pop song I heard recently. I also talked to someone for a bit and they said that they’re going to tune out from Taylor Swift for a while. They really didn’t like the latest album and I wholeheartedly agreed. I took a few pictures for Instagram and posted it on my IG Story. After completing and publishing all my entries, I booked a ride home and did a few proofreading passes of my latest blog post before posting it on my IG Story as well.

Song of the day: Crash by Matt Wills

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Here you go, way too fast
Don't slow down, you're gonna crash
You should watch, watch your stay here
Don't look out you're gonna break your neck

So shut, shut your mouth
'Cause I'm not listening anyhow
I've had enough, enough of you
Enough to last a life time through
So what, what do you want from me?
Got no words of sympathy
And if I go around with you, you know that i'll get messed up too
With you, with you

Na, nee, na, nee, na, na, nee, na, nee, na, na
Na, nee, na, nee, na, na, nee, na, nee, na, na

Journal entry for Saturday, October 4th, 2025

Sat, 04 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: SMX Convention Center and IKEA Philippines

Saturday continued with me accompanying someone throughout their entire night shift. We mostly just talked about Taylor Swift’s album and other life stuff. I helped them a bit with one of their tasks and setting up the DNS and a basic website for them. I mostly just used the website builder and shared my screen. I was kind of bored so I played my Antok FM playlist on Spotify and someone noticed it. She sang along to most of the songs there and we talked about how people don’t make songs like these anymore and I agreed and said that soft rock is mostly dead. I also played “Gisingin Ang Puso” by Liezel Garcia and someone didn’t seem like she knew the song, but the lyrics eventually came to her and she sang along. We also watched the music video for 12:51 by Krissy & Ericka because someone remembered a funny scene from it and I was interested in seeing what it was. After that, we mostly continued making the website until I finished enough of it for someone to continue later. We watched Chicago (2002) after that and it was a really good movie/musical. It was extremely showgirl-themed and I told someone that Taylor Swift’s album didn’t have any of these showgirl-style songs, and they agreed. We eventually finished the movie and we played a bit of chess here and there. After that, we decided call it a day for us but someone checked on Luan first to see if he’s up for a game and he was. We played Peak and got through the shore, jungle, and alpine biomes but Luan had to drop off at the caldera and someone and I made it through the kiln section, but we couldn’t get up and we eventually died. We really called it a day after that and I messaged Nathan that I’d accompany him today for Cosmania 2025 but I slept first. When I woke up, it was already 5 p.m. or so but I still got dressed and booked a ride to SMX so I can catch up with Nathan. He was still down and was just there and I immediately got a ride as soon as I could. I eventually met up with Nathan and we just walked around the stalls. I visited the stall of my artist friend but she wasn’t manning the booth so I didn’t really buy anything there. We then went to the main convention area and I took a few photos with some cosplayers, like a Homelander cosplayer, some Miku ones, and there were 2 dudes cosplaying as Peak scouts! I was so excited taking a photo of them because I love the game Peak and I couldn’t believe there were Peak cosplayers here. I bought a few stuff, mainly bags. I saw this Cup Noodle bag that was pretty big and I immediately bought it since it was fairly-cheap for a waterproof bag. I got sales-talked by the seller because they were selling a gashapon bag for 2,800. It had this small dial on the front and a clear space where you can put gashapons and I just had to get it. It was such a cute bag and I couldn’t resist myself from not getting it. I had bought some smaller plushies so that was cool. We walked around until we got tired and the event was closing anyway since it was around 8 p.m. or so. We had dinner at IKEA and Nathan got meatballs with rice while I got meatballs, rice, pares, and another serving of meatballs because I wanted to be extra. The meatballs were really good and I kept coming back for water refills, so that was nice. We mostly talked about Nathan’s relationship. After that, I tried booking for a ride home which took so long, but eventually we got a ride and Nathan went home first and I eventually got home fine. I just spend the rest of the evening scrolling and finishing writing that blog post.

Song of the day: Gisingin Ang Puso by Liezel Garcia

Journal entry for Friday, October 3rd, 2025

Fri, 03 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday wasn’t that eventful and I just talked to someone on and off for a while before going to bed. I woke up in the morning and mostly caught up with some stuff I missed from work. I also played some R.E.P.O. with Luan and someone in my downtime, we played through a few maps, especially the FNaF one and Peach’s castle. We didn’t really see anything new much because some of the enemies were just retextures. I also replied to a few messages from people who were surprised to see someone back in my life, so that was funny. After lunchtime, someone and I got into a call and we mostly discussed and talked about Taylor Swift’s new album The Life of a Showgirl. It was nice, there were some good songs that I liked and someone liked a lot of the songs in the album. But she noticed that it wasn’t as consistent or “themed” as the other albums were, which I also noticed when she pointed it out. We had a listening party and listened to a few songs together before she ultimately had to sleep and I continued on my work, focusing on completing my tasks and overtiming for a while. In the evening, I mostly accompanied someone and treated them to food again because I had some extra so we could eat together on call.

Song of the day: Cupid – Twin Ver. (FIFTY FIFTY) – Sped Up Version by FIFTY FIFTY

Dear Ella Hansen

Thu, 02 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: The Theatre at Solaire

Today was the day! Today would be the day I watched Dear Evan Hansen with someone! I was super stoked to watch this live again and I’ll finally watch it with someone. I didn’t really do much today aside from take the day off so I could rest and feel way better and I woke up at around 2 p.m. or so. I also played Outlast Trials with someone and Luan. It was raining a bit which made me worry but I just didn’t care and eventually it was around 4 p.m. when someone asked me if I was leaving yet. We had kind of a misunderstanding and I got confused for a while but it was fine and I booked a ride from my place to theirs so I could pick her up and we could go to Mendokoro together. The commute to her house took a while and the driver said that traffic wasn’t bad, but it eventually got bad because he took the wrong route to her house and we spent and hour or so driving. We eventually got near someone’s house and we picked her up. The commute from there to Mendokoro near SMX was kind of faster, but the driver took so long and had to refill on the way. He actually cut in line for gas, which was weird and someone noticed that. I could tell that the driver was kind of frustrated but we didn’t care and someone and I just kept talking about a bunch of other topics while on the way there. After a while, we thankfully got to Mendokoro just fine and thankfully there wasn’t such a huge wait in line for food. We eventually got our orders and they were quite quick serving it, which was needed because we were running out of time. I was so conscious of the time that I wasn’t able to finish my food, but whatever. We both finished our food enough and I was thankfully able to get a ride to Solaire quickly and the driver was just nearby. It wasn’t long before we got to Solaire and we passed by the casino and joked about playing there. We eventually got to The Theatre and we got our printed tickets. I bought a tote bag for her which costed a lot, like 2,000 Pesos and it was at a different price from when I bought it last time. We wait in line and took a few photos before going down. The lady there told us that our September 26 tickets weren’t valid for today, October 2, and we had to go back to the front desk to have our tickets re-printed, which was such bullshit because I already told the guy at the counter that I had our tickets rescheduled. But whatever, we went back to the counter and it was such a time crunch because some people took a while to wait in line and our reschedule took a while to process. I also noticed one guy trying to sell their tickets because their companion couldn’t make it. Eventually, we got our properly-dated tickets and we rushed to our designated entrance. The musical had already started and someone and I awkwardly waited before we could be let in and we missed the first song. We had to watch through a super low-quality live video feed which was just ass. But we eventually got ushered inside and we got seated. I noticed that Zoe’s actress was different tonight, which was strange because she was Alana in my last watching. Someone joked that Zoe’s mom had some explaining to do because she was so different, but it was fun seeing Jared’s actor be the same person, so that was funny. We just watched and it was nice listening to the songs again and seeing people perform live. Someone was mostly focused on watching and we didn’t talk to each other much like we usually would in our calls. Someone definitely loved the performance and we just waited in our seats during the intermission. The second half of the show eventually started and there were a few moments where someone had shed tears, which was nice to hear because she seemed super moved by the songs. The show eventually ended and we took a few photos and joined in on the people giving a standing ovation. We left and we brought a program before leaving and I gave it to someone as a further souvenir. We booked a Grab ride home and we took a super weird route to someone’s house. We mostly talked about the performance and someone thinks she could be a better Zoe, which I’m sure she definitely would. We eventually got to her house and I bid her farewell. The ride to my house had a bit of rain which kind of reflected my mood because, idk, I was a bit sad that I watched Dear Evan Hansen with 2 people and I think watching it with someone I’m in a relationship with would be better. But whatever, I got home, talked to someone for a bit, and then slept after scrolling for a while. I posted a few IG Stories of my day with someone and I got a few messages, mainly from Rachel because she was surprised to see someone back in my life. Truthfully, even I was shocked because I would have never believed that she would come back in my life and that we would watch Dear Evan Hansen together, so that was nice and I noted that in my IG Story.

Song of the day: Sincerely, Me by Mike Faist, Ben Platt, Will Roland

Journal entry for Wednesday, October 1st, 2025

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was a pretty normal day and I was mostly waiting in anticipation for tomorrow because someone and I would watch Dear Evan Hansen together. I passed through work just fine and I focused on a lot of tasks that I had to do. Sometime in the day, I bought Outlast Trials for someone and Luan. We downloaded the game and played a few rounds together. I can definitely notice that it was kind of in the same game engine as the original Outlast. I had fun playing with them even though the game seemed a little too brutal and gnarly for me. We quickly got used to the game and I kept upgrading my kit, which was healing-focused so I could help them both out. It was super fun playing it and we finished a lot of rounds. For the rest of the evening, nothing much went on but I did notice that Belle has a new post about watching Dear Evan Hansen, so that was a nice read.

Song of the day: All Time Low by Jon Bellion

Someone finally completed Silent Hill f!

Tue, 30 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I worked from home today and work passed by quickly. After work, I was focused on just watching complete their playthrough of Silent Hill f and it was really interesting seeing them complete it and watch the story unfold. We were both fully unsure of what the ending meant, so we did our usual thing to watch some YouTube videos explaining the plot and the story. All in all, the story was nice once we finally got it and we called it a day after that.

Journal entry for Monday, September 29th, 2025

Mon, 29 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Monday was just another day with me spending it at home and I didn’t really do much today aside from work and watch someone continue with their playthrough of Silent Hill f. It was nice seeing them complete more of the story and we were both really confused and wondering what the entire story is about. She completed a great amount of the story and by the evening I treated them out for food and we ate on call. We mostly talked about a few things like her work and we were really weirded out by this one applicant that had a resume that looked like a scrapbook of some sort. All in all, today was nice and I got to spend it watching someone continue their playthrough.

Journal entry for Sunday, September 28th, 2025

Sun, 28 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday was just me spending my time at home and watching someone progress through more of Silent Hill f’s story. I woke up late in the afternoon and I just watched a lot of Titanfall 2 videos and eating take-out, which kind of made me feel bloated for the rest of the day. My sister and cousins were out today for their trip to Manila so it was just me at home. I kind of felt a little dismayed that my sister didn’t do the laundry today even though it was the perfect day to do laundry as the past few days were just super rainy. In the evening, I booked a Grab ride for all of them to get home safely and they were super happy about it. Someone also got back from their trip and played through some parts of Silent Hill f in the evening before I went to sleep.

Bing Bong in Starbucks

Sat, 27 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

Today I was kind of bored so I decided to go to Starbucks on 32nd Street so I could work on my website. I didn’t really do much aside from code for a bit and work on the new redesign. I was supposed to work on my mood calendar entries because I was kind of delayed, but I put more focus on the Material 3 Expressive redesign than anything else. I didn’t stay for long because my stomach was kind of hurting and one lady asked if I was leaving so she could take my table and have 2 tables all for herself, which was kind of rude and an asshole thing to do because these tables aren’t for 1 person to hog. But whatever, I just got home and tried doing some work at home.

Song of the day: edamame by bbno$, Rich Brian

Journal entry for Friday, September 26th, 2025

Fri, 26 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was supposed to be the day someone and I would watch Dear Evan Hansen together but the rain was so extreme today and that there was a typhoon so our plans for today got axed. Thankfully, we were able to reschedule our viewing to October 2nd, even though I was really, really looking forward to watching Dear Evan Hansen today. I even took a leave for it, but whatever. Someone just streamed her gameplay of Silent Hill f and thankfully today's workday wasn't that stressful, if at all. I mostly just watched her play through the story and it was fun watching them beat some enemies and uncover more of the story. Too bad nothing else happened today and we didn’t really push through, but it’s kind of for the better because the weather was just absolute shit today. I just stayed at home and talked to someone but I didn’t stay up tonight to accompany her because she had someplace to go.

Song of the day: Sincerely, Me by Mike Faist, Ben Platt, Will Roland

Journal entry for Thursday, September 25th, 2025

Thu, 25 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was another day I’ll just spend at home but today someone downloaded Silent Hill f and told me that she’ll play the game, so that was nice. She had some issues playing the game and she took a while to configure the game, but it eventually was good enough for her to play on. She completed a bit of the story before Luan had to ask if we’re down to play on Discord. We agreed and played a bit of R.E.P.O. and even reached level 13, which was already a new record for us to play on. We stopped playing after that and I wrapped up my day.

Song of the day: 1-800 by bbno$, Ironmouse

Journal entry for Wednesday, September 24th, 2025

Wed, 24 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much else happened again today aside from me watching videos of weirdos thinking that the rapture was happening, which was obviously a load of bullshit. I commissioned Reynald to make that new banner for me so my profile looks more cohesive, so that was cool of him to take. Nothing else happened aside from that.

Song of the day: Angel #48 by aespa

Journal entry for Tuesday, September 23rd, 2025

Tue, 23 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much happened today aside from me reinstalling macOS because I wanted a clean reinstall of Tahoe and that I installed a lot of emulators that I didn't really need on my Mac.

Song of the day: Angel #48 by aespa

Journal entry for Monday, September 22nd, 2025

Mon, 22 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was the first full day of me working from home again and with a working Internet connection. Work just continued and passed by just fine and pretty soon my workday was over. In the evening, I got to play R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan, which was nice because I have a stable connection now and it worked perfectly.

Song of the day: I want you to by SMORZ

1 Gbps Internet! Finally!

Sun, 21 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Sunday had me playing R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan in the morning and I also called someone in the morning. We mostly talked about this toy car that she has which was pretty cool. We played a few rounds before I had to stop our game so I could prioritize getting my new fiber Internet line installed. The technicians arrived at 10 a.m. or so in the morning and they took a while fully setting up my Internet. They told me that it was a challenging task because my fiber line was already too long from a connection box and that the ones nearby were already full. The installation took so long, several hours in fact. It even rained and there was a part where I thought that they would just give up on installing it, but they pushed through. The first installation didn’t work so they had to re-lay the cable again and they took a good hour or so which felt like forever. But they eventually made it work on the second re-laying and they were able to confirm network access through the fiber cable. I was super glad and relieved to have Internet again, and it was at 1 Gbps as well! It was the fastest our Internet connection had ever been, from 30 mbps during our copper cable days to 1 Gbps. I’m personally glad and I celebrated by updating a lot of my devices. Too bad I wasn’t able to play with someone and Luan for today, but it was fine. I’m just happy I have a working Internet connection again.

Gilmore and Greenhills

Sat, 20 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Gilmore and Greenhills

My day started with me still talking to someone from last night. We got into a call and just lounging around and talking while someone was working. I still didn’t have a working Internet connection but it didn’t affect me that much. We eventually had to drop the call after someone had to focus on her task and I was kind of happy to get off the call because I’m so tired from 4 days of working continuously on site. I got my well-deserved rest after that. When I woke up, I had to prepare and get ready because Exavier and I have plans to go to Gilmore so we could buy his PC parts. I took a while to get dressed and book a ride but I fortunately found a rider that’ll take me to Gilmore and I thankfully didn’t have much problem going there and the motorcycle was pretty comfortable, too. I was kind of weirded how Exavier was able to message me through iMessage because I knew he had an Android, a Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra, to be exact. But I’ll just ask him when I meet up with him. I eventually meet up with him at PC Hub and he had just finished buying the PC parts that he needed and I talked with him for a while on what else to buy, like the CPU cooler. He eventually tells me that he has an iPhone now and that he was using an iPhone 16 Pro, which was super shocking to me but that’s cool. We eventually get the extra parts and we book a ride to Greenhills Mall nearby and our ride took a while there due to traffic even though it was only supposed to be a short trip. We had dinner at Ramen Nagi and Exavier treated me to Dairy Queen, which was nice. We just talked and ate for a while before booking a ride home and we just stopped at my house and Exavier had to walk all the way to their house. Thankfully, it didn’t rain that much at the end and we both got home to our respective houses just fine.

Journal entry for Friday, September 19th, 2025

Fri, 19 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing really went on much today aside from me working in the office with my coworkers. I’m just glad that I finally completed my mandatory days in the office for this month. I was mostly just busy with work and had some food with my coworkers before going home. I didn’t really accompany someone for their work today because I was super exhausted and I still didn’t have Internet connection.

Song of the day: Year 3000 by Busted

Lyrics that resonated with me:
He said "I've been to the year 3000
Not much has changed
But they lived underwater
And your great-great-great-granddaughter
Is pretty fine, is pretty fine"

Bing Bong in the Office

Thu, 18 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I didn’t have anything better to do today but it was another day in the office for me since I still didn’t have Internet at home. I stuffed Bing Bong in my bag just so I could say that I brought him with me to the office. Too bad none of my coworkers knew where he was from but that was fine. I just spent a usual day in the office but it was fun because I got to sit near my coworkers and I had lunch with them. I went home after a usual, fun day at work. In the evening, I had a call with someone and I set over the 2 albums to her: Taylor Swift’s “Lover” and ILLIT’s “I’ll Like You” and she unboxed and checked them out during our call, which was nice to see. We talked for a while more afterward before I went to sleep.

Song of the day: 360 by Charli xcx

Karaoke with coworkers!

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Rockstar KTV Glorietta

Today was pretty fun, I worked in the office today and I completed all the stuff on my plate early because I would be singing karaoke with my coworkers later after work. I didn’t really mind much of today as nothing much happened aside from me getting the proper phone case that I ordered. I found it so cool but I had a hard time getting my wrist strap through it. I had to stop by a store and be left behind for a while but it was worth it as I eventually got the wrist strap on and I caught up with my coworkers at Mad Mark’s in Glorietta. We had lunch together and my usual day followed. I finished everything I needed to do and timed out early. I started watching Unknown Number: The High School Catfish (2025) on Netflix during my downtime and while waiting for my other coworkers. One coworker accidentally spoiled a plot point and it kinda shocked me, but I kept watching until we got to the karaoke place. I think I sang first and then my coworkers kept singing songs after that. I mostly sung the classic OPM songs I know and I even followed through singing “Kabet” by Gagong Rapper. It was super fun and I loved singing some songs. It was also shocking that my coworkers sang “modern”/current-year songs like “Abracadabra” by Lady Gaga and some songs from K-Pop Demon Hunters. I sang a lot of songs and I got to sing my favorites, which was nice. We also had good food but I didn’t care about getting gout. We went home at around 9 p.m. and I got home safely. In the evening, I called someone and it was nice talking to them before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Favorite Thing by Nathan Farell, Lawrence

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Some people say, writing another song 'bout love is so cliché
But I am afraid, that I got one on my mind and I can't wait another day

And I'm done trying to fight it
I can't help wanting to write it
'Cause loving you is my favorite thing to do

Journal entry for Tuesday, September 16th, 2025

Tue, 16 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I woke up at around 4 today and I believe I got enough sleep or so because I slept at 9 p.m. yesterday. I immediately started updating ALL of my Apple devices onto their respective OS26 versions. I liked the Apple TV update, but I was more into the macOS26 and iOS26 update. I was instantly happy when my iPhone updated to iOS26 and I immediately applied the clear glass icon look for all of my wallpapers. I then tried macOS26 and it looked pretty okay. I couldn’t get colored icons to work but I was still happy to have the new journal app because I could finally have a singular place to write journal entries on, which was nice. After using my devices for a bit, I booked a ride to work and commuted to the office. Today was a chill workday. In the morning, a coworker tapped my shoulder and I got scared and screamed for a bit. It was pretty funny because they were also shocked but then they laughed at it and told me to lay off the coffee. I got Starbucks in the morning because I just felt super sleepy. I had lunch with my usual team and we just talked about iPhones, the latest iOS update, and how hard college life was for me and for them. We went back and I continued work for a while. Another coworker, my batchmate, also invited me out to hang and chill for a while and I offered to help them install the latest iOS update since I had data. We ate at Sbarro and then went back to the office as the update on their phone had finished. I was also explaining to them the basic concepts of a container, Docker, Kubernetes, etc. My other coworker and I also went out for quick bite and I just bought a small Belgian waffle from a nearby stand before going back to the office. Then once my work was all done I went out for dinner with my coworker batchmate and we also saw another one of our batchmates and we took a photo before sending it to our group chat. For the rest of the evening, the commute was very quick but I got rained on a little, which was fine. I also noticed that I got the wrong item from a place I ordered from but the people were kind enough to schedule a redelivery tomorrow. I also talked to someone on and off but that was it. I mostly spent the evening consoling my sister on a lot of stuff she was going through but I’m glad everything was okay by the end.

Song of the day: Angel #48 by aespa

Bing Bong!

Mon, 15 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Yesterday was pretty stressful because it was the 10th day of me not having Internet connection. It seriously annoyed me and I decided to work from home today. I was able to work on mobile data just fine, but I got annoyed that I didn’t have Internet for so long so I decided to terminate my Internet connection. Aside from that, I eventually messaged the toy shop I commissioned and paid them the remaining balance for Bing Bong. I eventually got Bing Bong delivered to me and, while I wasn’t a fan of how neon green he looked, it eventually grew on me because he is Bing Bong. It kind of made me miss playing Peak with someone and Luan, though. Even though I wouldn’t play Peak with them today, I just posted on my IG Story about the Bing Bong plushie that I got. Work passed by and nothing else happened for the evening so I decided to call it at night at 8 p.m. or so.

Song of the day: All Time Low by Jon Bellion

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I was the knight in shining armor in your movie
Would put your lips on mine and love the aftertaste
Now I'm a ghost, I call your name, you look right through me

Journal entry for Sunday, September 14th, 2025

Sun, 14 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: BGC

I got **A LOT** of sleep today and I didn't really notice it. I guess my body was just so tired from working the night shift (and from this week) that I just slept for a continuous 10 and a half hours. It absolutely shocked me that I slept that long, but then I thought about how many things went on this week, and yeah, it seemed correct. I had so many plans today like go to Starbucks on 32nd Street to hang out and work all day. I planned to write down the things I need to study and focus on so that I can have more skills in the future, like learning Docker and Kubernetes. I ate the leftover Jollibee first and then booked a ride to there. I even saw my sister while I was walking to my Angkas ride. It's funny because my sister's Angkas rider and my Angkas rider were the same person! She was the one who rode an Angkas to our place and the one she rode going home was the same one I'd use to get away from home. It's honestly so crazy but it was nice. I eventually got to my pin which was an Uncle John's nearby. I wanted to buy water so I could have something to drink and I bought 2 liters and a hotdog kind of as my lunch. I walked to Starbucks and got my usual white chocolate mocha and then I tried that new banana apple cake. The cake was nice, but I couldn't finish it despite staying for more than 5 hours. I mostly just caught up on some mood calendar entries, especially writing about all that happened yesterday. I had A LOT of mood calendar entries to catch up on and it took me so long, but I'm glad I finally got caught up. I posted some IG Stories and then went on my way to Mitsukoshi mall to finally try Mendokoro since someone had suggested them to me a while back. While on the car ride there, I noticed that there were still some dates that don't have a correct entry so I fixed them while waiting for a seat and for my dinner. Thankfully, I was fully up-to-date on my mood calendar and I was able to enjoy my dinner in peace. I got the "super chashu" ramen and a cashu burger, both of which were honestly pretty good. I especially liked the ramen because it was totally unlike anything I've ever tasted. It was worth the price, but I couldn't take my mind off how "smoky" it tasted. I believe that a smoky BBQ flavor is one of the best flavors I've ever tasted. This one tasted like ramen AND smoky, grilled BBQ which was honestly the first time I've ever had that in a ramen. I eventually finished my meal and booked another Grab ride home and the driver was pretty quiet. I didn't play any music while on the ride home so it was just me and the driver sitting in absolute silence, which was kind of a first for me. I started to have this weird neck pain and it was hurting like hell, but I was fine as the ride home didn't take long and I was able to chill for the rest of the evening. I still had some time to burn so I finally forked that PH webring that I've been putting on hold for so long and even wrote a funny PR for it. It took all of my remaining brain cells to write that PR but I'm just glad to have it done and merged. I got some well-deserved rest after that because this week was just full of events. AND I STILL DON'T HAVE A WORKING FIBER INTERNET CONNECTION!

Song of the day: Sincerely, Me by Mike Faist, Ben Platt, Will Roland

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Dear Evan Hansen
We've been way too out of touch
Things have been crazy
And it sucks that we don't talk that much

Sincerely, Me

Sat, 13 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: The Theatre at Solaire

Dear Dartegnian Velarde, Today was finally the day! The day I'd watch Dear Evan Hansen with Belle in Solaire! I spent most of the morning on the last leg of my night shift and I was talking to someone on Discord. I thought that we would get into a call or something, but she seemed too interested in some DotA tournament and I honestly think she's just watching it with some other guy. It felt kind of weird for me to get this feeling again and I just lost interest in talking to them. I just ordered food for myself and ate because I skipped dinner last night. I just ate my food alone and slept while someone kept trying to talk to me and even tried to invite me for a Tetris battle, but I declined. When I woke up, I think I had enough sleep. I checked my sleep measurements and it says that I got 6 hours of sleep, so that was nice. It was just afternoon so I spent some time in the house just reheating the food from last night, watching a YouTube video, and eating. I took a while I honestly don't know how time passed so quickly because it was already around 1:40 p.m. or so. It takes me around 40 minutes to get there and the show starts at 3:00 p.m., so I was already cutting it close. I booked on so many apps and I booked as much and as often as I can, hoping for a rider that will accept. I eventually got one and it did take a while for me to get to Solaire, and I got wet on the ride there because it suddenly rained a few meters away from Solaire, but I was glad that I got there already. I went upstairs to The Theatre and I looked around for Belle and she tells me she's sitting on some sofa. I eventually see her again and I get a bit nervous again, for some reason. I'm only ever like this with Belle and never with my other women friends, but I just push through it and greet her. I then ask how long she has been here and I then get up to ask around if we can already go in. The usher told me that we could go in and I pick up Belle so we could go in. We got seated and the theater absolutely reminded me of the Samsung Theater in Makati, aand it was nice that I got seats so close to the edge and I got us balcony seats. The show eventually starts and I immediately remember that I really love musicals. The voices played from the speaker and I was absolutely amazed at how some of the props on staged moved on their own. It was so crazy because I couldn't get over it the minute I noticed it. I was also immensed in the story. Even though I am a big fan of musicals, I somehow missed watching Dear Evan Hansen. The plot was nice but it was really interesting and also unsettling that it was all built on top of Evan being a grifter, which shocked me. I cringed and squirmed in my seat when he admitted to Connor's parents that he had been lying all this time. During the intermission, Belle and I went out of our seats and I bought her a tote bag and tried to print out our tickets. I asked if I could and it was only 50 Pesos, surprisingly, but I wasn't able to print them out because our tickets had already been scanned, which doesn't make a lick of sense. I wanted them printed out as a souvenir and our tickets were absolutely valid, but the cashier didn't want to print them out. Belle caught me while waiting and it was kind of disappointing to go back to our seats without our printed tickets. Oh well, we just went back and continued watching the show. The rest of the show was really nice, the story concluded and we went out to take a few pictures. We walked around Solaire for a bit talking about Belle's upcoming trips and stuff. We had to pass by the casino area. The extreme smell of cigarettes made me gag and even retch. I really am not used to cigarette smoke and I can't even recall the last time I smelled it, but we eventually got through the casino and Belle got a ride to her bus terminal. I just went home instead of lounging around here, because there isn't much to do and everything else will burn a hole in my wallet. When I got home, I planned to go to Starbucks on 32nd Street in BGC but I didn't push through it and I just browsed the Internet and slept. Today was pretty great, even though I was extremely awkward and stuff around Belle. But it was nice that everything went well today and it was nice to have watched a musical I've been planning to watch for such a long time. Sincerely, your best and most dearest friend: Me

Song of the day: Sincerely, Me by Mike Faist, Ben Platt, Will Roland

Journal entry for Friday, September 12th, 2025

Fri, 12 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today didn't have much going on aside from me accompanying someone as we were both working our night shifts. In some part of our call, she eventually shut down because of the stress which kind of seemed off and awkward because I didn't know what to say to her. She eventually was okay enough and she introduced me to this ongoing DotA 2 tournament that she was interested in. She showed me the teams, some of the tactics, and some team formations. I didn't really memorize or listened to it that much because I already know DotA 2 and other moba games aren't for me, and I've tried all of the moba games already. I even tried DotA 2 in high school but I didn't stick with it. She was eventually fully okay and played some Crime Scene Cleaner in the early morning. We also played some R.E.P.O. in the early morning, so that was nice. Nothing else went on for the rest of the day and I just got enough sleep. In the evening, we talked on Discord but we didn't get into a call, which seemed off. Kind of like she was super preoccupied or was already in a call with someone else. I didn't really care much but it bothered me that I still care about such things, when I know I shouldn't.

Journal entry for Thursday, September 11th, 2025

Thu, 11 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I was working the night shift again today and I mostly was just calling and talking to someone. I didn't really do much aside from just talking to someone about random things and watching them play Crime Scene Cleaner. I still didn't have Internet connection so I didn't have much fun today and I was still annoyed at my Internet connection. We talked about some news that happened throughout the day, but that was mostly it. I accompanied them in the evening again as both of us had night shifts again.

Journal entry for Wednesday, September 10th, 2025

Wed, 10 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today had me still spending time with someone as we were both working the night shift and we were bored so we played some of our old, usual games like guessing the Taylor Swift song title, singing the following lyrics of this Taylor Swift song, and we even moved on to identifying the title of this pop song and identifying some of Ariana Grande's songs. It was super fun and I enjoyed it a lot. While I didn't have Internet and only relied on mobile data, I was able to stream the Apple event with someone and we watched as some of the new iPhones got released. We also watched this short film called Visuvius (2012) and it was kind of disgusting to me, but it was an okay short movie. Nothing else happened in the day and I accompanied them in the evening as well.

Song of the day: The Sweetest Pie by Megan Thee Stallion, Dua Lipa

What a day

Tue, 09 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Makati

Good God, today was super exhausting. I was still working the night shift from yesterday and I just got to the office recently. It was really dark in the office and honestly kind of creepy. It looked like a Backrooms level and I found out that an abandoned office floor actually was a Backrooms level, which was nice. I continued to work on some important stuff and ate some food at the nearby Starbucks that was still open. I continued my shift and eventually got home at the crack of dawn. It was such a new experience for me going home from the office *while* the sun was rising. I used to go home at times when the sun was setting, but it was the first time to see it rising on my commute home from work. When I got home, I continued my call with someone and we just watched a few videos of KATSEYE's performances. We mostly watched a few more performances and tried calling on FaceTime because both of our Internet connections are bad. We only called for a while because I had other things in the day to do. I got ready and went right back to Makati to do some special assignment. I thought it was going to take a short while since I had already made quite a bit of progress in the first 2 hours. But the people I was temporarily with had other things to do and that stalled my time there. I thought I could go home before rush hour, but I unfortunately got caught up in it. I did have some good lunch to make up for how sleep-deprived I have been, considering that I've been awake for 36+ hours or so. I was able to wrap it all in one day, though, so that was nice. I booked a ride home and it thankfully didn't take me long to get a ride. In the evening, I just slept as I had another shift in a few hours and I just worked and got into a call with someone as the night went on.

Song of the day: Topping by ILLIT

Journal entry for Monday, September 8th, 2025

Mon, 08 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I got some good rest today because I didn't have morning work and tonight was the start of me working the US night shift for the week. I didn't do much in the day aside from playing R.E.P.O. with Luan and someone in the afternoon because I didn't have much to do. I was able to play R.E.P.O. just fine on mobile data, thankfully. But our place had an event go on in the evening which I believe caused the extreme slowdown in my Internet connection. I was super frustrated and I started my night shift work with a lot of meetings back to back. It was super hard to work at home so I just said "fuck it" and booked a ride to the office super late in the night. Thankfully, I got to the office super quickly and in 20 minutes or so. The driver took the absolute fastest route to the office and there were barely any cars around as it was super close to midnight. I got to attend my meetings and I saw how the office looked like at night, which was still pretty cool despite how frustrating my Internet connection issue has been.

Song of the day: Thick Of It (feat. Trippie Redd) by KSI

Journal entry for Sunday, September 7th, 2025

Sun, 07 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal Mall

I didn't have Internet connection again today so that was pretty frustrating. To combat the boredom, I would spend the day at Venice Grand Canal Mall today and watch a movie. I booked a ticket to see the film My Daughter Is a Zombie (2025) and I didn't research about what it was to avoid spoiling myself. I booked a ride there and spent some time in the Starbucks just watching a few stuff on YouTube before getting up and walking to Zus Coffee because my seat at Starbucks had already been taken. I worked on my MacBook Pro for a while before going to watch the movie. There were only 5 of us in the theater, which was kind of scary because there was no one else here. I had a Korean family sit behind me but thankfully they weren't that loud or annoying. I loved the film and the plot, even though it wasn't clear at first where it was going. I still liked it and it even drove me to a few tears, so that was nice. In the evening, I planned to spend my time here as there still wasn't Internet at home. My sister was here a few minutes ago but she eventually had to go home. I kind of panicked and worried so I booked a ride home only to see her just eating with her boyfriend at home. I kind of rolled my eyes that I panicked for nothing, but I just spent the night just chilling and browsing using mobile data.

Song of the day: Topping by ILLIT

Journal entry for Saturday, September 6th, 2025

Sat, 06 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Saturday started with me accompanying someone throughout their night shift. Even though I didn't have Internet connection today, I still tried to talk and call with them over mobile data. We were able to play R.E.P.O. in the early morning, which was nice. But for the rest of the time, we just had our regular call and stuff. We played Monopoly and she and the bots were winning against me. Someone kept trying to actively prevent me from building properties by taking pieces of other properties and we kind of had some competitiveness going on until I kept landing on other properties. I bankrupted myself after that I just gave up because I didn't see the game as winnable. Someone kept playing and eventually won but then they left the call because they were pissed at me. It kind of devolved into this argument over Monopoly and them accusing me of being a sore loser, even though I just gave up because I was deep in debt and they didn't want to help me out anyway. Our Monopoly games usually revolve around us helping each other out when either one of us are in debt from the bots, until we run off the bots from the board and it's just a 1v1 between us. But someone was actively playing against me this game and I couldn't build enough properties to gain momentum so I just gave up. We both argued that we made valid moves but someone didn't like that I just gave up even though I knew I was going to lose anyway. I just told them that I would stop staying up at night because this was total bullshit. I didn't want to stay up all for this woman to get mad at me over a game of Monopoly, especially when I just came home from a long commute and a day in the office. I didn't want to stay up late for such an ungrateful, horrible person so I just told her that I won't be staying up anymore. She eventually had her head calm down and quickly apologized as I was sleeping. I didn't say I accepted her apology but I just agreed to treat them to food on Monday so that she knew everything was okay between us. She agreed and I got my sleep after that because I was genuinely physically and emotionally exhausted. For the rest of the day, I didn't do much aside from trying to browse the Internet on mobile data. It was so annoying that the Internet wasn't back so that kind of put a huge damp on things.

Journal entry for Friday, September 5th, 2025

Fri, 05 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today I spent the early morning just being in call with someone and playing R.E.P.O. and Monopoly with someone. R.E.P.O. in particular was fun because we were able to kill off a few monsters and clear a few levels on our own. It was pretty fun but I had to get my sleep today so I eventually went to bed. In the morning, I didn't have Internet connection but I played a quick few games of R.E.P.O. with someone. I just planned to work from home today so it was fine. We played for a bit before I had to go to work. I tried working at home for a bit, but I couldn't even log in so I eventually made the decision to go to the office today. The rest of the day was mostly spent in the office and I worked on a few tasks. I eventually went to the office past lunchtime so I didn't have lunch with my coworkers and instead had lunch alone. it was pretty boring and I mostly just focused on a few things. We didn't eat out for *merienda* today so I just ate siomai and a Belgian waffle alone. I went back to work and talked to a coworker about Docker for a while before we all went home. In the evening, I still didn't have a working Internet connection but I was able to accompany someone for her night shift and we played R.E.P.O. as well.

Song of the day: Black Betty by Ram Jam

Journal entry for Thursday, September 4th, 2025

Thu, 04 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today I was able to get modded R.E.P.O. to work and I played some modded R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan before going to work. It was pretty fun and I enjoyed a few rounds just exploring new places. After that, I booked a ride to the office and just had a normal, usual day there. I had lunch out with my coworkers and spent the day just talking to them and focusing on a few tasks that I got. I was more excited to go home because I wanted to play modded R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan again. So the office day just passed but I had a lot of fun talking to my coworkers. In the evening, I played R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan after coming home. We explored a few new stages, including a Backrooms-themed level and a Mario-themed level that was set inside Peach's castle. We also had that Minecraft stage set inside the Woodland Mansion. It was pretty fun exploring a few new places in R.E.P.O. and I had a lot of laughs while playing it with them.

Song of the day: Silvertoes by Parokya Ni Edgar

Journal entry for Wednesday, September 3rd, 2025

Wed, 03 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today I felt okay enough to go to the office and so I did on a Wednesday. I commuted to work and for the rest of the day, nothing really noteworthy happened. It was mostly a chill day at the office and I wasn't able to have lunch with my coworkers so I just had lunch alone. I had a lot of things to do but I also felt that kidney stone passing which gave me quite a bit of pain. I felt like passing out in the office due to the pain and I had to manage it while doing some work. But eventually I was able to manage it and nothing much happened at work after that. I eventually went home after a ride that felt like it took forever, but was only 40 minutes. I didn't really do much or play afterward and just talked to someone on Discord to pass the time.

Song of the day: Spoliarium by Eraserheads

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Dumilim ang paligid

Journal entry for Tuesday, September 2nd, 2025

Tue, 02 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today's kidney stone pain is more manageable than what it was yesterday and I didn't have that much pain. I mostly spent the day just relaxing at home but eventually I got bored and felt okay enough to go out and I decided to go to my usual hangout place at Starbucks on 32nd Street. I went to buy water at a nearby Uncle John's first and I got a lot of water. I also got a drink and I still had some leftovers from breakfast that I brought in my bag to eat just in case I got hungry. I mostly just caught up on some mood calendar entries while there and just took a few photos. I did quite a bit of work catching up but there was still a lot of work left to do. I planned to leave before rush hour started but my sister asked me to just wait for them so we could commute home together. I just tried to pass the time by browsing the Internet and doing random stuff until then. Eventually my sister met up with me and we had some pasta before booking a ride home. After I got home, I played R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan and it was pretty fun even though we didn't play for long.

Song of the day: Island Song (Come Along with Me) [feat. Ashley Eriksson] by Adventure Time, Ashley Eriksson

Journal entry for Monday, September 1st, 2025

Mon, 01 Sep 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

I was in **A LOT** of pain today from having that kidney stone pass and it was extremely excruciating to get through my usual work shift with this much pain. I legit felt like passing out at times from the extreme pain. It was just horrible and I didn't feel okay the entire day. I also called in sick for work tomorrow because the pain today is already unbearable enough. After work, I did try playing modded R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan and we had a lot of issues so we just played a vanilla game and then had a bit of fun playing. After that, we played a few rounds of Phasmophobia after that. I found an IG Reel of Adventure Time's "Come Along with Me" song and I kept playing it the entire day and while we played R.E.P.O.

Song of the day: Island Song (Come Along with Me) [feat. Ashley Eriksson] by Adventure Time, Ashley Eriksson

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Come along with me
And the butterflies and bees
We can wander through the forest
And do so as we please
Come along with me
To a cliff under a tree
Where we can gaze upon the water
As an everlasting dream

Journal entry for Sunday, August 31st, 2025

Sun, 31 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday had me still waking up and wondering why it was already Sunday. I seriously can't believe I spent the entirety of my Saturday just sleeping. I seriously spent half of my weekends just sleeping. This is a first and honestly a big surprise to me, but I feel relatively great because I got to have enough sleep. I planned on going out today to relax and catch up on my mood calendar entries, but since the rain was so bad, we just had take-out at home. I enjoyed my day at home regardless, plus this day turned out pretty peaceful, for what it's worth.

Song of the day: 5 Years Time - Sun Sun Sun by Noah And The Whale

Journal entry for Saturday, August 30th, 2025

Sat, 30 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Saturday started with me sleeping and eventually waking up to someone leaving behind a few messages in our Discord server about their work. They kept inviting me for Monopoly and I eventually got to play with them and we also got into a call. I wasn't able to successfully win this time and it was mostly someone playing against the bots, until the bots ultimately won, which was funny. Their work eventually got free enough for us to play R.E.P.O. and I got on my PC after that. The first few rounds of us playing R.E.P.O. were okay, but it wasn't anything spectacular. We eventually progressed enough to buy this weapon called the Boltzap and we used to kill and stun a few monsters, mainly this Reaper lady. It was so surprising because we finally had a weapon we could use to kill enemies. I eventually got a gun as well and using the boltzap + gun was super OP and fun. It was like we were playing a totally different game. Someone would stun the enemies with the boltzap and I would kill them using the gun. I was so surprised to have killed a large clown with it and it was such a rush because we got to fight back and kill that thing. We kept playing until we got to Swiftbroom Academy and we were killed by No Face. Funny enough, I was looking at *another* No Face when another one came to our side and killed us both, which was a total bummer because we lost all our money and weapons. We played another game with Luan and it was fun for a few rounds, but someone eventually got tired and we all stopped playing for the morning. I went to sleep after that. For some reason, I barely woke up after that. I woke up very, very late in the day, at around 11 p.m. or so and I kept sleeping after that. I had such weird fever dreams, but I think I don't mind getting more sleep because my body's going through a few things, and I didn't get much sleep on Thursday anyway.

Song of the day: Memories by Maroon 5

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Here's to the ones that we got
Cheers to the wish you were here, but you're not
'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
Of everything we've been through
Toast to the ones here today
Toast to the ones that we lost on the way
'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
And the memories bring back, memories bring back you

Treating coworkers lol

Fri, 29 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

With the extreme pain from yesterday, I wasn't really sure if I could be able to go to the office today, but my pain wasn't that bad in the morning so I just pushed through it. I thankfully got to the office early today, which was a pleasant surprise. I got seated at my proper seat because it seemed that the area around my coworkers was full, but we eventually all went out at the correct time and I was able to treat them out. We ate at Banana Leaf in Greenbelt and they had a good selection of Thai food, which was nice. They mostly kept teasing me about how often I get into medical mishaps with my kidney stones and HIV tests and whatnot, but it was all in good fun and I enjoyed the banter, I also laughed along with them. Lunch was very filling and I spent around 7K for all of them, which was okay since I expected this much. I kept teasing one other coworker to treat us since they got promoted recently, but they also agreed to coffee and donuts for us, which was nice. We got coffee and I thanked them as well. I went back to the office first because I had a lot of stuff to do and a meeting to attend, but after that it was just a chill day in the office for me. I eventually had to go home early because I got here early and I played R.E.P.O. with Luan and even Miles was able to join us. It was pretty fun but also a bit chaotic since there were 4 of us and Miles/someone was having input issues. We eventually took a break and I mostly messaged someone on Discord and I passed out for a few hours to get some rest.

Song of the day: 5 Years Time - Sun Sun Sun by Noah And The Whale

Journal entry for Thursday, August 28th, 2025

Thu, 28 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

I called off work for today because I didn't have any sleep from last night and I just want to spend the entire day just resting. I felt some really, really horrible pain today and it left me bedridden for the rest of the day. I was able to sleep through some of the pain and I downed a lot of water knowing that my pain was from a kidney stone that's passing. In the evening, I was okay enough to play R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan, so that was nice. I also had a lot of friends message me and ask about my wellbeing again, so I felt way better than I usually would.

Song of the day: Shalala Lala by Vengaboys

Protocol 3: Protect the Pilot

Wed, 27 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad
Significant Location: Hospital ER

Today supposedly seemed like a normal day, I would be working from home today and my workday was nothing of note. I got some rest at the end of my shift and, when I woke up, I was in searing pain. I felt like passing out from too much pain because it was just excruciating. I felt like I was going to pass out. My initial idea was to ignore it but after seeing my urine turn bloody, I knew I had to rush myself to the ER. I initially thought that it was the HIV PEP that was causing this and that my kidneys were shutting down. It felt like a true House M.D. moment where someone gets rushed to the ER. But this would be my first time rushing myself to the ER. I booked a ride to the nearest available ER and it was quite a ways away, but it was fine. I just had searing pain. I took a motorcycle ride to the ER and I just prayed that I wouldn't pass out while on the ride there or cause a major accident. I was playing Big Time Rush's "Paralyzed" and it was such a fitting song to listen to while trying my best not to pass out from the pain. I also remembered BT from Titanfall 2 saying Protocol 3 and that's what I was just thinking to myself as I was rushing myself to the ER. I had to file a lot of paperwork which just made me wonder how a truly disabled person would do all this but I just filled out my patient forms and then another doctor came to see me. They made me get a urinalysis and I just waited for the results. Thankfully, the hospital had Wi-Fi (even though I already had my pocket Wi-Fi on me, the signal was poor) and I was able to message my friends and family, also I informed my workmates that I was rushed to the ER. The doctor told me that the hospital would be kind of expensive and I asked if it would be in the hundreds of thousands of Pesos, but they assured me that they didn't cost that much. I had an IV line connected to me and I was given some pain medication, and the doctor eventually returned to tell me I had a kidney stone. I'm honestly glad the diagnosis was "just" kidney stones and not my kidney shutting down or what. I had another doctor come take a look at me and I was just given anti-pain meds and I was told that I could be discharged. I posted a few pics to my close friends on IG and messaged a few of my concerned friends that it was just kidney stones. I paid my ER bill which was thankfully around 3,000 Pesos, and I honestly expected a worse bill. Thankfully, I still had that 4,000 Peso downpayment from my staycation to pay for this, and I'd argue that medical care is priceless anyway. I got a ride home and I thankfully arrived home safe. For the rest of the night, I was mostly in pain but I felt a little better knowing that my pain had a name and that I should just make some lifestyle changes moving forward. I spent the entire night in agony but today wasn't as awful as I thought it would be. I had concerned friends message, reach out, and some were really concerned about my wellbeing, which was honestly super nice at a horrible time like this.

Song of the day: Paralyzed by Big Time Rush

Back to Work!

Tue, 26 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I finally went back to work today and I'll be working from home today, but things are pretty usual, it doesn't feel like I missed much. I quickly got back and up to speed on all of the stuff I had to do, which wasn't much, so that was fine. Going back to work really felt seamless and there wasn't much that got in the way, so I generally had a stress-free return. For the evening, I played R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan and it was pretty fun. I also tried to put some Peak stickets from Discord onto iMessage and I made it work. I didn't do much after that and I slept afterward.

Song of the day: LOVE SCENARIO by iKON

Back to Reality

Mon, 25 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

Today was sadly the last day of my staycation. I genuinely enjoyed this place and it's kinda sad to be going away so soon, but I guess that's just life. I stayed up for a bit and ultimately was up very early. I just used my Mac for a bit and took a few photos because I had a feeling I'll miss this place. I wanted to have breakfast early today and I got down at an early time. I had breakfast and filled my plate with good food and sent some photos to my sister. I had a really, really good breakfast and I immediately felt very full. After that, I didn't do much aside from taking a proper bath and prepare myself to check out. I packed all my things and I accidentally nicked my MacBook while trying to put in the charger. I hate seeing any kind of damage on my MacBook but whatever, I just didn't care at this point. I went downstairs and I got my security deposit, which was nice because I need the 4,000 Pesos. I booked a quick ride home and thankfully the car ride wasn't that expensive, which was a surprise because the trip here via car was kind of expensive. I eventually got home and was greeted by my sister and it felt so weird seeing my room again (and the house as a whole) after my trip. I really want to make my daily life look as comfortable and as nice as my stay. For the rest of the day, I mostly just slept. I got that Sky manta delivered and I sent it to someone in the afternoon. In the evening, I played Peak with someone and we played R.E.P.O. with Luan shortly afterward. She also showed my the manta in our Discord call and it looked cute. We also played Phasmophobia and got quite a lot of ghosts right. I did a bit of trolling and filled the ghost room with trash and other props, so that was funny.

Journal entry for Sunday, August 24th, 2025

Sun, 24 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

I didn't really do much today aside from sleep and sleep, I mostly just slept the day away because of my broken sleep schedule and my sleep debt. In the evening, I did try to play a few games by screen mirroring my iPhone to my Apple TV. I also ordered room service today, which was nice. It was a little bittersweet knowing that today was my last full day for my staycation. I tried to make the most out of it by enjoying my day. It kinda sucks that I mostly slept this day off rather than do something productive or cool with it, but that's fine. I did enjoy the hot bathtub and the really clean room, and I also played some games at the end of the day.

Journal entry for Saturday, August 23rd, 2025

Sat, 23 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

Saturday continued with me accompanying someone for her evening work. We mostly just ate and talked about a few things. I treated them out to Burger King since they were thinking of getting it. We got our food and we ate together, which was super nice. We mostly talked and played some Monopoly games on the side for the night. We kept talking until the morning and that's when we tried playing Peak together. I tried my best to stream on the TV and use the controller, which was a super nice experience considering this big bed and me just chilling because the room was so cold. We couldn't get to the peak this time but we eventually played R.E.P.O. with Luan in the morning. After that, we stopped playing and I got my complimentary breakfast downstairs. I stayed up for a while and eventually slept. I mostly slept the day away but in the evening I watched Nobody Knows (2004) again. I just remembered how heartbreaking the story was and maybe it would give me more insight because I last watched it as a teen, and rewatching it as an adult might give me more insight on it. I also ordered room service and the serving of fries they gave was so generous, so that was really nice. I watched the movie up to the heartbreaking point after that I couldn't watch anymore. I did other things to pass the night away.

Song of the day: Night Changes by One Direction

Journal entry for Friday, August 22nd, 2025

Fri, 22 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

My day started with me accompanying someone for a bit throughout their night shift work, but I told them that I couldn't accompany them the whole night because I'm so tired and sleep-deprived. I will accompany them for 2 full nights this week, for Tuesday and this upcoming Friday, and I didn't want to add more to my sleep debt. So instead I had to set up that boundary and we just talked for a bit. We mostly talked throughout the night and I even bought tickets for musicals that we'll watch together in the future. We've planned to watch Dear Evan Hansen and Les Misérables in the future, which was nice. I also bought them that Sky manatee ear set that I promised. For the rest of the day, I mostly just relaxed and rested. I eventually got to watch and finish the entirety of Lost in Translation (2003). It was nice, but it wasn't as deep as I had expected. It was very slow-paced, which was kind of okay for me. I ordered some food for myself from Mushroomburger and the fries didn't really live up to the taste compared to when I ordered them in Tagaytay. I had 2 liters of buko juice as well so I was able to hydrate myself well. In the evening, I played some R.E.P.O. and Phasmophobia with Luan and someone. It was super fun to play a lot of games with them and it really elevated my mood. After that, I accompanied someone for the entirety of their night shift.

Song of the day: Somebody To You by The Vamps

Journal entry for Thursday, August 21st, 2025

Thu, 21 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

Today started with me watching Wall to Wall (2025) on Netflix. It was a good story, but it made me feel a bit more paranoid, for some reason. Eventually, we moved to watching Lucy (2014) and, even though I've already watched this before, it was kind of boring this time. After that, I tried to get as much sleep as I could, but I couldn't sleep much considering it's my first night and the bed is kind of... filled. Not to mention I was still a bit paranoid from last night about my stuff being stolen. But I was eventually able to get some sleep and I eventually woke up just in time for breakfast. I had breakfast with my guest and I had a pleasant talk with them, I mostly asked what they did and they said that they dealt in selling cars and stuff. The breakfast buffet was also nice, I enjoyed the bacon the most. After that, my guest eventually left and I had the room all to myself once again. I played with someone in Sky for a bit before they left me to do other stuff. I didn't really have anything planned for today but I read online that there was medication available for post-exposure to HIV. I thought about it since it might cost me a bit of money, but then I thought about it and figured that it was worth taking it rather than me worrying about it in the future. I went back to that clinic again and the ride to Makati was fairly quick. Ayala Avenue was fairly empty, too, which was a pleasant surprise considering that it's usually packed. Since today is a holiday, I figured that there weren't that much people around here. I eventually got to the clinic and had to get tested for Hepatitis B and C first before taking the PEP medicine, and thankfully both turned out negative. I was prescribed meds to take over the course of 30 days or so and then I was off again. I thought that I could hang out at the Starbucks nearby, like last time, but it was closed so I went to another Starbucks at Ayala North Exchange. I took a picture of a cute cat sleeping and I didn't disturb it further as I kept walking. It was honestly surprising to see almost no one around in the middle of the day. I eventually got there and I tried the new grape drink and it was honestly kind of disgusting. Totally not for me. I had another coffee drink and I took some medicine with it. I tried working here since I brought my MacBook with me, but I ultimately couldn't since I didn't feel comfortable and I wanted to go back to my room to make the most out of my staycation. I decided to just book a ride back and eventually got a ride. It didn't take long since there was barely any traffic. I planned to write and do other things, but I essentially ended up sleeping and doing a few random things. In the evening, I played R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan for a while, then we moved to playing Peak. Someone and Luan were impressively able to make it out of the kiln today, which was a surprise because they haven't been out together without me. We played Phasmophobia afterward and eventually stopped playing. I got into a call with someone after that and I talked about buying tickets for upcoming musicals so we could watch together. The night continued from there.

Song of the day: City Is Ours by Big Time Rush

Staycation 2025!

Wed, 20 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Staycation 2025!

Wednesday started with me still accompanying someone for their shift, but I was also excited since today would be the day of my big vacation! We played a few games at this point, mostly Peak and R.E.P.O. We had fun in Peak and someone kept trying to feed me the poisonous green apples and we eventually both died at the mesa due to the sandstorms. I was trying to find the golden Bing Bong tomb to no avail so we eventually just died and played R.E.P.O. instead. After that, someone and I left the call and I tried to get as much sleep as I could, which wasn't much considering that I'll mostly stay awake tonight again as well. The day mostly passed by as I just rotated between sleeping and preparing to get ready for my trip to the hotel/building for my staycation. In the afternoon, I eventually made my commute there and it was a costly trip, but I got a Joyride car ride instead of a Grab one because that somehow would cost me 1,000 Pesos if I booked a ride, which was honestly just stupid. Regardless, I was able to get a ride and I remembered an old Big Time Rush song that genuinely served as hype music for my staycation. It was such a good song and it really did capture the vibe of today: going to my staycation and enjoying the entire evening. I eventually got to the hotel and checked in, and I was asked to pay a 4,000 Peso security deposit, which was kind of weird. I thought that I had already paid for a security deposit when I booked the room, or at least that's what I thought that the 2,000 Pesos were. I didn't have that much cash on hand so I just told them that I'll pay some cash later. I withdrew quite a bit of cash and I honestly didn't bother looking in my account after that. I was able to pay for the security deposit and then just chilled for the rest of the night watching House M.D. until I had other things to do in the evening.

Song of the day: City Is Ours by Big Time Rush

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Rolling past graffiti walls
Billboards lighting up the block
Everyone of us on a mission (Oh, yeah)
Got a whole crew by my side
Cars beep-beep when they pass us by
Be ready to get down to business (Hm-mmm)

We pull up, open the door
All the girls, scream there they are
It's packed from wall to wall and everybody is calling
Here they come, it's almost time
Feel the rush, now hit the lights
We gonna get it all started

Because the night is young, the line is out the door
Today was crazy but tonight the city is ours (City is ours)
Live it up until the morning comes
Today was crazy but tonight

The city is ours! (The city! The city!)
The city is ours! (The city!)

Journal entry for Tuesday, August 19th, 2025

Tue, 19 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was my final day of work before my staycation tomorrow and I was honestly really excited. Work passed by quickly and ended. For the evening, I essentially just played Peak with someone and Luan in the evening. We were fine playing Peak and I was initially following someone before I had to stop for a bit to reply to some work stuff and then someone keeps going ahead on her own. I eventually die because I didn't follow either Luan or someone to the top and I just got lost. They weren't able to revive me at the top of the shore area because someone had already activated the statue for a mythical item. We continued on to the tropics where someone and Luan had both completely taken different sides and I mostly stayed with Luan because he didn't mind it and maybe that someone would get mad at me for being a backseat climber. Luan was able to reach the peak of the tropics and revive me while someone took a while to climb. I wanted to try to help them and I tried calling out to them but we got no response. We did notice that the distance meter at the campfire was shortening but eventually someone turned into a ghost and then they got so pissed off, they left the game. What happened afterwards was that someone was pissed off at me for a number of reasons, but it wasn't relevant to this round because I was really following them at the start of the game. I even showed them screenshots but they didn't want to believe me and instead wanted to believe the narrative they have in their head. They got into this weird stance and was very standoffish, which was honestly incredibly disgusting and reminiscent of how we used to work the years before with all the petty, stupid arguments and such. But somehow, someone was able to be reasoned out and things were okay after I had to acknowledge their struggles and we were okay after that. Surprisingly, we were okay with no repercussions and we continued to play R.E.P.O. afterwards in the late evening. It was fun and it saved the day from being a really poor one by someone's selfish hardheadedness. It's still a massive surprise how they're the only person in my life I often/only get into arguments like these, but whatever. I did tell someone that it trigged my anxiety and she wondered if it would be healthy, but I just continued on just enduring toxic mini-arguments like this. I had my staycation to look forward to tomorrow so I'm weathering whatever storm comes my way until then.

Song of the day: The End of the World by Skeeter Davis

Journal entry for Monday, August 18th, 2025

Mon, 18 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much went on today aside from me just doing work throughout the morning to evening. After work, I played Peak with someone and we got into the tomb of Golden Bing Bong, but we didn't make it through the mesa this time and we eventually stopped playing Peak. We played R.E.P.O. with Luan after that and we had fun playing a few rounds before stopping to play for the day.

Song of the day: Black or White - Single Version by Michael Jackson

Journal entry for Sunday, August 17th, 2025

Sun, 17 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday was pretty chill for me. I played Sky in the morning around 3 a.m. with someone and I was able to make Peak run on my M4 Pro MacBook Pro in preparation for my staycation next week. I just completed today's dailies with someone in Sky and we logged off after that. I didn't do much else throughout the whole day aside from just browsing IG Reels and other usual stuff.

Song of the day: I Wanna Be The One by fun.

Journal entry for Saturday, August 16th, 2025

Sat, 16 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday started with me accompanying someone throughout their entire night shift, which was the usual case/routine at this point. We did our usual things like order food together and eat for a while, but we didn't stream anything during this time or anything. We just ate and I got good food from McDonald's and got yet another footlong sandwich from Subway. Someone ordered Dunkin' and I sent her some money for coffee, but that was mostly it. We played Monopoly online as well! We were bored and someone actually was losing most of the time, which led me to bailing them out, but it was a good strategy since we were playing against bots. Ultimately, I lost against the bots and gave someone all of my Monopoly properties before declaring bankruptcy. Someone was eventually able to snag the win and I'm glad I got to see her win. I also added a funny sitcom laugh track to our server's soundboard and I found it hilarious. I kept using it but someone didn't seem that amused, but she was teasing me for it. Morning ultimately rolled around and she told me that we should play Peak and so we did. She saw that Luan was online and she invited him to play with us. I was surprised because we were playing peak so early in the morning, it was only around 7:00 a.m. or so. Thankfully, the seed for today's map was pretty easy. We got through the shore part fine, then the tropics weren't that hard once we found a path, and we eventually got to the new mesa biome again. We tried to find the entrance today but I couldn't find the way to floor glitch into the golden Bing Bong's tomb. Eventually, someone and I died to the weather conditions and Luan was alone. He tried to keep looking for it, only to give up and try to "lock in" before falling in the chasm and dying instantly. We played Peak again and didn't have any trouble going through the stages and we eventually got back to the mesa biome again. It was so hard and I tried to find the glitched entrance that allows us to go down to the tomb, to no avail. I eventually gave up and we tried to play the game normally but I saw the new "sand ant" trap and showed it to someone. She was curious and tried to go deeper in, only to die. Luan also tried to save her and died shortly afterward. I was able to dive in and rescue them but I didn't have stamina and died in the process lol. We moved on to play Phasmophobia next where we played 2 rounds. At first, were able to guess the correct ghost but I died. In the second round, we ultimately got another perfect investigation. Someone went to sleep shortly afterward and I gave my remaining 6-inch Subway sandwich to my sister as a thanks and her breakfast for cleaning up the bathroom. For the rest of the day, I mostly just slept. I had a weird dream where someone was playing Peak with other people and then I dreamed of them seeing a new guy. I woke up and I see a message from her saying that she also had a dream of being asked out but by a girl, which was super weird. I didn't know what to feel about it but I just reminded myself that she wasn't the one and that these were weird leftover feelings that'll go away again. I just watched House M.D. and did my own things for the rest of the evening and I ordered dinner as well. I helped resolve an issue between my Mom and my sister, so that was nice. But I mostly enjoyed just watching House M.D. until midnight.

Journal entry for Friday, August 15th, 2025

Fri, 15 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I caught up on a lot of sleep debt today, but it seems that I only got the usual 7 or so hours of sleep, which was surprising. I still felt good enough to wake up early and I had breakfast at home again and talked to someone early in the morning. We played Sky and chatted there for a bit, even though it was a bit difficult to type, and we then had to leave because I had to also leave for work. My commute to work was surprisingly early today, which was nice. I was able to sit next to my usual set of coworkers today and we ate lunch together. We ate at Modern Shanghai in Glorietta because there was a 50% discount for Bistro Group restaurants. The food was nice, but also really filling and salty, which made me worry a bit because I didn't want a gout flare-up before my big vacation next week.

Song of the day: Coffee by Beabadobee

Journal entry for Thursday, August 14th, 2025

Thu, 14 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I didn't get much sleep today on account of me watching through episodes of House M.D. on Netflix. I just couldn't sleep and just kept watching in my downtime. This is a bit alarming because I haven't been sleeping much for the past few days so I have a bit of sleep debt racked up. I also had on-and-off calls with someone but it wasn't anything too important aside from staying with them on call for a bit and helping them with their work. Eventually, I was still able to sleep, even if it was only a little. When I woke up, I was so groggy and tired that everything just felt surreal. I decided on whether or not I should call today off, but I think I'm still fine enough to power through the day and just thug it out. I booked a ride to the office and got there surprisingly okay. Today was a usual, chill day in the office and I mostly just did my usual round of tasks. I made sure to hydrate and drink coffee in the morning so that I won't feel too sluggish. Nothing was too out of the ordinary today, I mostly spent time with my coworkers and had them tease me about my upcoming vacation next week. I hate lunch out with them and had a good serving of Pepper Lunch for... lunch, and when we went back, we tried this 20:20 countdown timer game where you get a free watch if you manage to stop it on time, and I got 20:25 on my timer, which was the closest anyone got in our team. Too bad I missed by 5 milliseconds. Aside from that, we just went back to the office and I continued through my usual round of tasks, with my coworkers and I going out to buy *merienda* together in the afternoon and talking about our college curriculums. After that, I did a few things before timing out for the day and booking a ride home. I was so sleepy by then so I just slept the night through.

Journal entry for Wednesday, August 13th, 2025

Wed, 13 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was a pretty good day, I didn't do much in the early morning to afternoon aside from just working but I had time to play with someone in the morning. After playing, I commuted to the office and just worked. It was a chill day in the office and it was just me and 1 other coworker in the isle. We didn't do much aside from work and play the board game Unmatched in the afternoon since our schedules were relatively-free. We also went out for *merienda* and got ice cream at this nearby Carmen's Best stall. After work ended, I quickly went home and spent the entire evening just playing games with Luan and someone. I also played enough Peak while waiting for them to get the Bing Bong avatar decoration on Discord, which was nice. I had effectively memorized the route to the tomb of golden Bing Bong and I had to end my solo run after I got there. Eventually, someone, Luan, and I started playing Peak and I basically just guided them to the tomb. Someone died while on the way to the tomb and Luan shortly died while we were playing around with golden Bing Bong. It was up to me to make it up the Mesa biome alone and I was able to lock in while Luan and someone were talking and chilling as ghosts. I can't believe that I actually made it to the top and I was able to resurrect both of them as we got to the caldera section. Unfortunately, we died on the way and we weren't able to get the 24 Karat badge by throwing golden Bing Bong into the lava in the kiln. We just played another game, Phasmophobia, and our night continued from there as we played a few rounds before logging off for the night.

Journal entry for Tuesday, August 12th, 2025

Tue, 12 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Tuesday started out with me playing Peak with someone and Luan. We were just continuing our game and call from yesterday and we surprisingly go through the Mesa today as a whole team. We got through the caldera and kiln section as well without anyone dying! We even carried Bing Bong all the way to the top and escaped the island as 3! It was super nice and I'm glad we were able to get out AND bring Bing Bong with us. After that, we all left the game but someone and I still stayed to call and watch the next installment of The Two Embers in Sky. It was deeply sad for us, especially when it hit me that the manta was actually dead. I hold out for the idea that they could be resurrected or something, but they really did die. It was kinda sad for us but we played a few quests and watched some seasonal outfits parade around the Aviary Village. But I eventually had to sleep as I had work in the morning. Work passed by just fine and it quickly rolled around to the evening. We played for quite a bit in the new Mesa biome but we didn't get golden Bing Bong today. It was fun playing Peak but we eventually stopped and played Phasmophobia instead. We stopped playing after a few rounds after that. Someone also showed me Theodore on cam while we were talking on Discord so that was something. All in all, today was pretty great.

Angrily Running on Zero

Mon, 11 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Surprisingly, I couldn't sleep today and I don't know why but I just stayed up all night doing absolutely nothing. I was just scrolling and browsing the Internet on my phone all night and I barely felt sleepy until it was time for my sister to wake up and she made me some Mie Goreng for breakfast. I also got coffee today because I needed something to help keep me up and it did. I was able to time in for work early and fix up a few things and work continued as usual. The morning and afternoon wasn't really noteworthy and I talked to someone on and off until my shift ended. After work, I was still surprisingly awake but kind of sleepy. I'm not sure if I was irritable but someone invited me to a game and I accepted. It was initially just us two playing Peak and she kept teasing and making fun of me from the start of the game. It kind of started to irritate me a little how often her jokes on me were and I didn't even get a normal minute to have some banter or talk as she was just relentless. Luan eventually joined us before the jungle stage and we kept going. He talked about being able to stay up to play the Mesa update later since he's already on vacation and I had this idea in my head of us just playing games until the update. Eventually we get through the jungle and then it's the alpine stage. Someone died midway through the run and I jumped in after them to save Bing Bong and have their character pass out. Since we had the Scout Effigy, I thought we could just revive them at a later time since we're strapped for utilities and food. I managed to save and get Bing Bong as me and Luan climbed up and found a way to the top of the alpine. While on the way, someone kept joking about me going after Bing Bong and then Luan eventually also did. They kept teasing and someone laughing so loudly hit a nerve and I started to get ticked off. At the caldera stage, we continued through but near the end, someone fell and took down Bing Bong with them. I tried to search for Bing Bong in the lava but I eventually couldn't make it and died. When they revived me before the kiln stage, I was already pissed off. I went back to try and save Bing Bong but I couldn't see him anywhere and my heart just broke. I was trying to bring them the whole run so that us 4 could at least get to the top together, but all that happen this run was have them make fun of me and then lose Bing Bong. I was honestly pissed off at this point but I didn't want my anger to show so I just shut up at the end. I went back to the kiln alone and had to speedrun it to the top. I passed by them and someone and Luan wondered why I wasn't talking but they could hear my keyboard sounds so my mic wasn't muted. I really just wasn't in the mood to talk. I kept climbing and climbing alone but I still helped them and showed them the way. Somehow, someone fell on the way and died leaving me and Luan to climb. I was still pointing and helping him, even giving my rope gun. Luan eventually used the scout effigy to bring someone back but she eventually died again before we got to the top and it was just me and Luan at the top by the end. Someone asked me why I was quiet and then I told them that I was ticked off. The airport stage started after the credits rolled and I left the game without saying anything. Someone and I got into kind of like an argument but it ultimately ended up in her telling Luan to back off from joking and she herself toning it down. She didn't say sorry or seemed to feel bad about her actions, which just made me shake my head at this and I just told them that this wasn't how I expected the evening to turn out and wished them a good evening instead. Eventually, she asks if I'm still g to play and I say I was, even though I was preparing to sleep. I got back on my PC where we played R.E.P.O. for a bit. It was honestly awkward for the first while because I was just really mad around an hour ago but we just played on. I was tense and felt off at first but things were okay and they acted completely fine, but it was mostly someone left alone trying to go through the stage and revive us. Eventually, Luan feels sleepy but I ask them to stay up and get coffee instead. I offered to order him coffee but he just made coffee on his own. I just treated someone to Starbucks to calm things down and to show that I'm not that mad anymore and as a show of good faith, which just sounds ridiculous but whatever. We kept playing R.E.P.O. until the next day rolls around. We were supposed to play Phasmophobia but then played Peak instead when the new update was out. I'm not sure what to make out of this day, it felt horrible but continued really well so I'll jot this down as good since that idea of us playing games together throughout the whole night came true.

Song of the day: Again by Fetty Wap

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I want you to be mine again, baby, ayy

Journal entry for Sunday, August 10th, 2025

Sun, 10 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday was pretty boring again. I mostly just published some mood calendar entries and watched a lot of episodes of House, M.D. on Netflix. I ate spicy food today, which was nice, and I got to eat some good nachos and order dynamite from Peri-Peri as well. Today was pretty chill and nothing much went on.

Journal entry for Saturday, August 9th, 2025

Sat, 09 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Glorietta

Saturday started with me accompanying someone while she does her shift all night. We mostly talked and they said that One Missed Call (2003) wasn't that cary to them and I agreed. It didn't seem as scary when we watched it, but it was fine since I got to watch a full horror movie with someone again. We stayed up just talking, making jokes, and I was honestly surprised at how energetic I was considering I barely got any sleep last night. Eventually, we ordered food and she got some from Starbucks while I over-ordered (again) and got food from McDonald's and Subway. I ate the McDonald's fries and burger first but also ate half of the footlong sandwich from Subway, which I just learned was only around Venice Grand Canal Mall. We eventually got our food and I ate while someone ate and then drank her coffee. Since she was bored, she curled her hair and showed that Dyson Airwrap I got her for. She turn on her camera and we mostly just talk while on cam. Time passes quickly and I didn't even notice that it was already early morning out. We also play a game where we start naming names that start with each letter of the alphabet and it was a pretty frustrating and hard game. She realized that I was horrible to play against because I'm very competitive and so is she. We keep talking and naming names until she eventually says that it sucks that she hasn't watched Dear Evan Hansen yet and that other people watch more musicals than her. I eventually cave in to buy tickets for her so she can watch Dear Evan Hansen with me, but only if she pays around 2K for tickets. At least she agreed because I don't want to be shelling out that much money for tickets again, especially for free, and I already bought tickets for my sister and I for free, too. We talk about other things like my upcoming trip and I give her some details but we eventually had to leave the call to do other things and she stopped replying afterward. I got some well-needed rest after that, but it wasn't a good amount of rest because I slept in the morning to afternoon. When I woke up, I noticed that my sister was out for her birthday celebration and I eventually got ready to go to Greenbelt to accompany her and have dinner together. We walked around and talked about a few things but I'm glad she was mentally doing okay. We walk and talk until we settle on a place to eat which was Peri-Peri Charcoal Chicken in Glorietta. We ate some chicken and pork belly while we were discussing some drama that's going on in the house. I tell her that we'll be fine and the house will collapse without us because I pay for the electricity and water, and I know for a fact that they can't handle all of that on their own. Then I tell Ailysh that I'll give her money for any book that she likes and we get some other stuff served later before we go out and she buys a book at Fully Booked. She then visited Regatta to get gifts for her manager and then we book a ride home where I just chilled and caught up on a few things before going to bed.

Song of the day: Love Me Like You by Little Mix

Journal entry for Friday, August 8th, 2025

Fri, 08 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday started with me and someone still in "VHH" and we were watching One Missed Call (2003). She was just watching and it didn't seem that scary to her. When I was watching, it didn't scare me that much either. The pacing of the movie was kind of off, too, since most of the things happened in the first hour of the movie. It was 2 hours long and the second part just felt so long and I kind of lost interest, honestly, but someone was still watching as intently as she could. It was eventually late for me but I was able to sleep with the many hours that I had left. I woke up feeling so much in pain, for some reason. I had this severe stiff neck pain, too. But whatever, I'm determined to power through it and get to work. I was still able to go to work, despite having difficulty getting a ride there. My workday was pretty usual but there were a lot of people here in the office again today so I sat separate from my usual coworkers, but it was fine. I still had lunch out with them and we ate at the food court in Glorietta. I got Pepper Lunch this time and I got matcha from Pickup Coffee because I needed something more to wake me up. When I placed my coffee on the tray that had my food from Pepper Lunch, it was heavy and a bit unbalanced. I went to our table and I just dropped the additional drink I had from Pepper Lunch! I spilled the cucumber juice all over the floor! Fuck! I had to ask a janitor to clean it up, which was kinda sad because I had to inconvenience someone and I lost my drink, too. But I still ate and had a fun lunch with them. They kept teasing me to treat them out since I just got regularized and I agreed anyway. We ate and some of them teased me for spilling the drink, but it was all in good fun. There also was that joke that I always get food worth more than 500 Pesos. But after eating, we all went back to the office. For the rest of the day, I was battling between this sharp pain and working on this script. I was able to finish it early, but still, I had to just fight through the pain. I took a rest at the break room for a bit and then went back to work. My coworkers were happy that I finished the script, though, and they suggested one more feature. I'm glad I was able to add that additional feature, too. My coworkers also sent me a calendar invite for me to treat them out, which was nice because they settled on some Thai restaurant that hopefully won't break my bank this month. In the evening, we all went home separately and I stayed for an hour or so more in the office just doing some additional tasks from my boss and cleaning up my script. I eventually finished it and booked a car ride home because I was so tired and I honestly needed a breather. I got home at around 10 or so and it was pretty late. Someone still asked Luan to play with them but she eventually had work things to do so we just called the game off. We both got into a call in "VHH" and I talked to them and accompanied them all night because it was a Friday.

Song of the day: Night Changes by One Direction

I Guess I’m Regularized ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thu, 07 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today started with me just planning for my upcoming "staycation" because I believe I can call in an early win and say that I'm going to be regularized for my job. I had my doubts, but I do believe I will be regularized. So I booked a hotel for August 20-24 and I slept after that. I then got ready for work and commuted, and thankfully the drivers today weren't speed demons. I was supposed to meet with my sister today after work because their company had an event in Makati, but it got cancelled and she just stayed at home. Thursday was a pretty average day, I had lunch at Landmark together with my coworkers and it was pretty chill. During the workday, I received a call from an HR personnel regarding a question I had about regularization. It seems as though I *am* getting regularized. It's honestly terrific! I'm honestly glad and relieved that I did a good-enough effort at this new job for me to stay in it for a while. It's my 3rd company after working for 7 years which is pretty good because I'm loyal to my companies and I guess I'm going to stay here for a pretty good while. It bolstered my resolve to find a better place to have a staycation at and I eventually found a new place! I'm also staying for 1 more day, so that's August 20 to 25. It should be good enough for me to get some well-deserved rest after working corporate for 7 straight years of continuous employment (and not even having a work week of unemployment). It's honestly a major feat how I got this far in life with no diploma. For the rest of the day, I just enjoyed the company of my coworkers and did my tasks. I worked really hard on this script, so I hope it'll be appreciated well. It did get good feedback from my boss, which was nice. For dinner, we ate at Popeyes in Glorietta while we were talking about life stuff, credit cards, and such. I went home after that. In the evening when I got home, I had enough time to play Peak with someone and Luan! We died in the alpine section because it was pretty hard, and we kept trying again and again on multiple difficulties to no avail. We event just died in the short biome, which was funny but also sad because we were struggling to make progress by then. We called it off afterward. After playing, someone and I got into a call and I streamed my screen. We decided to watch One Missed Call (2003) together because someone apparently hadn't watched it yet.

Song of the day: I'll Be Home For Quismois by Camilla Cabello

Journal entry for Wednesday, August 6th, 2025

Wed, 06 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I slept early last night because I had to go to work today and I still had to go even though I have a bit of gout in me. Whatever, I just pushed through it and went to the office anyway. I booked a ride there and the driver seemed like a lunatic. It was honestly the scariest motorcycle ride I've experienced in a while. The driver was just barreling down the street at full speed. It was honestly so scary and I didn't want to die. I got to work on time, exceptionally early this time, but I was shaken from the ride. But I just continued through a normal day at work. It was mostly busy and hectic because we have this big meeting, but I'm glad that we had a pizza party afterward. I was honestly surprised at how much people there were, so that was nice. I talked to someone and we just talked for a bit while I was having lunch and then they dropped off after that. My stomach was also feeling a bit weird today, which sucked because I felt really sick and drained after my stomach turned. But I still completed my shift regardless. I passed by Denny's and I also noticed that the cat there had a new cat house! It was in the shape of a camping tent and they were sleeping inside, and they looked so cute. I took some pictures and then did other things for the day. I even discovered this new Sabrina Carpenter song that apparently has something to do with the 2007 movie Juno. I kept singing it over and over all day. I eventually booked a ride home after work but it took so long for me to find a decent ride. The riders kept cancelling. It took so long for me to get a ride home! I just wanted to get home as quickly as I could so I could play games with someone and Luan again. But I only found a ride super late into the night, around 8:10 p.m. or so. The ride home was almost as terrifying as my ride to work! The rider was yet another speed demon and I'm just glad I got home alove. For the rest of the evening, I was lucky enough to play R.E.P.O. with someone and Luan. I carried them hard this game, but I also died early at the start lol. We bought a gun and I tried to kill an enemy, but that thing attached to me and someone had to shoot me to get rid of it, which didn't work. But I eventually got revived and I helped Luan carry this big clown statue in the museum level which helped us get the win for that stage. We kept playing and we even got a grandfather clock to go into the extraction point area, but it got broken and we died to the disembodied head enemy. We kept playing and eventually went to this wizard stage where we met this new enemy mob that looked like "No-Face" from that Ghibli movie Spirited Away. It was scary but we were able to get through the stage just fine. We played through a couple of stages and we event went to the wizard stage again where I destroyed the C.A.R.T., which was funny. But we were able to just carry objects to the extraction point just fine. It was fun and we kept playing until we got to that science lab stage where Luan died first to some fire hazard item, then someone was attacked by a monster, and I was left alone again. I kept pushing through and eventually found a big server that, if I got to the extraction point, I would've been able to revive both of them. But unfortunately that was cut short when my game suddenly disconnected as Luan had to sleep and someone had work. It sucks because I put so much effort in getting that win but oh well. I just went to rest after that.

Song of the day: Juno by Sabrina Carpenter

Lyrics that resonated with me:
You make me wanna make you fall in love
Oh, late at night, I'm thinking 'bout you, ah-ah
Wanna try out my fuzzy pink handcuffs?
Oh, I hear you knockin', baby, come on up

I know you want my touch for life
If you love me right, then who knows?
I might let you make me Juno
You know I just might
Let you lock me down tonight
One of me is cute, but two though?
Give it to me, baby
You make me wanna make you fall in love (Oh)

Journal entry for Tuesday, August 5th, 2025

Tue, 05 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today aside from a usual workday for me. I started with still talking to someone and we played a short game of "guess the pop song" where we tried to guess but we quickly had to stop because someone was doing work. We also played some Sky: Children of the Light and we watched the next part of the The Two Embers. It was really sad and I was so heartbroken after watching it, and someone was feeling the same, too. I eventually had to drop the call and go to sleep. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened. Work came and passed. I talked to someone on and off a bit but we didn't play a game in the evening because someone was mostly busy.

To the Peak, Together!

Mon, 04 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Monday was a pretty normal day for me, work-wise. I timed in for work and completed a busy Monday shift. It was mostly catching up on my tasks and I believe I was pretty productive today, too. Work came and passed without me doing anything really noteworthy. After work, I played Peak with Luan and someone again! It was a new day, so a new seed was expected. We continued our way through the shore, the tropics, the alpine section, and surprisingly we got to the caldera section. It was a surprise because the alpine section seemed hard and I died, which sucks because I died and took Bing Bong with me! Luan also died shortly after and someone had to climb up alone. Thankfully, she was able to resurrect us, but I lost Bing Bong! Our climb continued regardless and we surprisingly passed through the caldera section just fine and we then got to the kiln. The kiln is usually the make-or-break part and this is where one of us usually dies, but surprisingly, we got through this part! We helped each other, organized our climbing paths, helped each other up, and we didn't leave anyone fully behind. It was a miracle and we kept climbing up until someone got out first, then it was me next, then finally Luan. ### I can't believe it, we 3 made it to the top together! Sadly, it was a little incomplete without Bing Bong, but I was so happy for us regardless. We've been playing this game for a while and it was the first time we were able to climb up to the top as three! It felt really nice that we were able to accomplish this because we've been trying hard to reach the peak for more than a month. After playing Peak, we talked about what game to play and I think Luan recommended that we play R.E.P.O. and I'm honestly surprised that neither of them have bought/played the game. I used to always see this game on IG Reels and I'm honestly kind of happy that I'm able to play this game with them now. I buy it and we all move to it, with someone inviting us both into their hosted lobby. At first, it was kinda scary and it worked a bit like Lethal Company. But I eventually got the hang of it, and so did someone and Luan. We got through the first round but we eventually all died and failed. We had this fun minigame where we'd try to fight each other and whoever wins gets a crown and a "King of the Losers" title. Luan got that both in our playthrough. We continued and it was honestly a fun game because the characters talked so wackily. I kept replaying the Samsung ringtone and they laughed at it, which was funny. We eventually stopped playing at around midnight and it was a pretty great day for me. I got into a call with someone and we kept talking until the next day.

Journal entry for Sunday, August 3rd, 2025

Sun, 03 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday was pretty boring, I just stayed at home and watched videos of Peak on my phone. I didn't really do much else aside from that.

I Climbed with Someone AND Bing Bong to the Peak!!!1!!

Sat, 02 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I had a discussion with someone yesterday about accompanying them the whole night today. It started with me on the bed with my MacBook typing and chatting with someone on Discord while glancing at some Korean TV channel playing in the background. Someone was still busy with her work in a meeting so we didn't call much at first. Then she asks if we're going to play Peak and I tell her that she's the one who's being monitored. She eventually turns on her PC and I get on my PC as well so we can play. Since it was a new seed, we didn't really know how to get through today's world seed but we just braved through it anyway. Of course, we're bringing Bing Bong with us and I took a few screenshots of someone holding Bing Bong at the start. The shore/beach part looked easy enough and we were able to navigate ourselves through it. The jungle/tropics part was the one that seemed really challenging. I couldn't figure out the right way and I couldn't see a proper way that easily led to the top. We just went for the middle and kept climbing up. It proved difficult but we were getting by fine. Someone says that I should go "to the left" and I told them that the phrase was actually from Beyonce's song "Irreplaceable" which I had just found out this year. I sing a few lines and she does sing it as well, and she ends up playing the entire song and singing it while we were playing. We got through a wall by having someone come through first and I tossed her bag across the gap once she got to the other side. I was next and it was a bit difficult for me, but I got through it. We struggled finding a path but I used a chain launcher to get us from one side to another. Then we kept climbing up and that's where I had trouble. Someone was able to successfully climb first, but I fell multiple times and kept getting injured. Eventually, I died and lost all of the stuff I was carrying, which was a shame. But someone was able to resurrect me once she got to the peak of the tropics/jungle. We got through the alpine section and we tried looking for the capybaras at the start, but we couldn't find them at all. We tried looking but eventually gave up when we didn't see any smoke. Someone sadly had to give up her chance at a gourmand badge for this run. It was difficult, but we somehow got through it after I placed a rope launcher near the top and we were able to climb up just fine. For the caldera section, it was a little brutal but we got through it after tanking a few burns. It wasn't long before we passed that part, too, and got to the final stage: the kiln. Some bullshit always happens here. I just had the feeling that this place was cursed. Either someone dies or some major inconvenience causes us to stop or have problems. Last time, someone and I had a good run but then she got caught in a meeting and had to die by falling, and she brought Bing Bong down with her. This time, she was in a meeting again. It sucked a lot because she was held up for quite a while at the start, she almost slipped and fell, too. I was so frustrated and annoyed because this place truly was cursed. But somehow, we kept climbing together. We used up all of the tools in our arsenal. I chose the wrong path and had to use the chain launcher for us to get to another side at the start of the kiln. Someone pointed out that it was the wrong path. And then, after climbing up, I used a piton stuck to the wall so we could climb up further. Then, finally, an anti-rope spool to climb up a wall to some rocks. I was so scared because we were so close to the peak. Finally, we had this difficult part where we had to climb up some rocks. I *almost* fell at this area because I was running out of stamina and didn't see a way up, but I was able to make it somehow. Lastly, it was someone's turn and she climbed the correct path and I was able to grab her as we climbed the few easy steps to the peak. I almost cried at this stage. We had reached the top of the volcano and exited the kiln 😭 This run was so legendary. Someone didn't die nor pass out and it was actually me who died. This was a flawless run for her and the first time she got through ALL the stages, and ON OUR FIRST RUN. ### AND WE BROUGHT BING BONG TO THE PEAK WITH US! I immediately started signing that God Is and Defying Gravity mashup we hear on social media about the game. We finally got Bing Bong to the top and both of us survived this run. It's so unbelievable. This was our first run at this seed, no do-overs, just a blind run to the top. I seriously am glad we got to finish this game and someone got a few achievements, mainly the "survivalist" achievement and the achievement for carrying Bing Bong to the end! She finally got it and I'm so happy for her! After such a legendary run, I just knew I was the one treating her and so I did. I ordered some food for myself, I mainly had that new Fantastic Four meal from Burger King and I wanted that affogato as well. I also had KFC since it had free delivery. For someone, I got her a *lauriat* from Chowking and I got her Starbucks as well so she could keep staying up for her work. It's funny that we got through all that and got food while she was in a meeting. We went back in Peak to test out the new cannibalism feature and she made a mistake when my character turned into a big turkey. She was so embarrassed but she was fine after she got her food and we were eating. We watched a video from Edvasian while eating and I actually liked my food, it was pretty "fantastic." Someone and I watched other videos after that, mainly ghost stories from one of our favorite YouTubers, Megan. After that, she was mostly busy with work but we were still on call. I played some Tetris while waiting and then played SSX Tricky like before. She mostly just watched and saw me playing that game while her work was going on. I often picked this character, Mac, while playing and she said that her brother used to pick him as well. I kept on playing that game as she was doing her work and was in her meeting. She eventually ends her work and we play around in Sky to do some dailies, see some baby manta, and explore some areas. It was fun and we eventually leave the call afterwards. I was really, really tired at the end of it but I had so much fun. It was the good kind of tired and it definitely was the highlight of my weekend. I mostly slept on-and-off for the rest of the day. In the evening, my sister was missing and I thought she would be there, but she was somewhere else. She asks me what I want for dinner and I suggest Andoks. She eventually arrives home and I see that she dyed her hair brown. My sister also brings the dinner I requested, which was nice of her. It was a surprise and she was wondering if it looked good or not. It looked okay to me but I wasn't used to seeing my sister have a different hair color than black. Even she seemed to regret it a bit but I tell her that she looks fine. Eventually, she calls her boyfriend and plays games with him for the rest of the day. I didn't really do much after that but I just browsed social media and got some well-needed rest and relaxation for myself.

Song of the day: Wicked X God Is by Kanye West

Lyrics that resonated with me:
[Elphaba]
Oh

[Kanye]
Everything that hath breath praise the Lord
Worship Christ with the best of your portions
I know I won't forget all He's done

Salt air

Fri, 01 Aug 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was *finally* the "salt air" month and I'm honestly curious as to how August will turn out. I got a good amount of sleep last night and I'm going to head out today for work because I don't want to waste such a sunny day like this. After waiting a while to book a ride on 3 separate ride-hailing apps, I finally got my ride and eventually got to the office just fine. I was still kind of tired from last night so I do a few stuff and wrap it up before going to the nearby Starbucks to have some breakfast. When I got there, there was this large tumbler that I debated on whether or not I'd get it. I ultimately decided against it, since my existing 60oz Aquaflask is still holding up well. I just order this new "churro" coffee and this chicken and "macaroni" pasta. I don't exactly know what I got, but it was good. Especially, the pasta, it made for a really nice breakfast. After eating, I immediately went back to the office and continued working. For lunch, I decided to have something from Pepper Lunch. I got the chicken and salmon one and it made me feel pretty full. Nothing noteworthy happened after that aside from me bumping into one of my coworkers as they were just heading out to lunch, and I was on the way back to the office for a meeting. Today was all well and good, it was a quiet day in the office and I enjoyed the peace and calm for today since it wasn't that busy. I went home after work and the commute was straightforward as well. The driver took a different route, going near SLEX but also going through Bayani Road, which was interesting. I got home and talked to someone for a bit. I tell them that I don't think I can stay up all night with them at this state. Either I sleep now for a few hours until 12 midnight, or I stay awake until midnight and stay for a while. She just asks me to sleep now and accompany her for the entire night so that's what I ended up doing. I slept for a while, which was kind of sad because I think I only slept for 90 minutes, which was 1 REM cycle. I woke up and couldn't sleep anymore after that.

Song of the day: august by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Salt air, and the rust on your door
I never needed anything more
Whispers of "Are you sure?"
"Never have I ever before"

But I can see us lost in the memory
August slipped away into a moment in time
'Cause it was never mine
And I can see us twisted in bedsheets
August sipped away like a bottle of wine
'Cause you were never mine

I Got Someone and Bing Bong (Separately) at the Peak!

Thu, 31 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

My day started with me being in a call with someone and she was going to stay up really, really late. I offered to get them coffee and food like we used to and she chose McDonald's. I got Wendy's and even made a joke about how perfect it would be at this time of day (because I used to eat Wendy's very, very late back in 2024), and she teased me about it. It was still funny and I took the joke just fine. We got our food and we watched a few videos from Edvasian about Crumbl cookies. Eventually, someone messages me that she was playing Peak and that the seed for today's run was very easy. We got on call and she shared her screen showing that she was able to make it to the alpine section alone. She did make a mistake, though, and that caused her to somehow fall into a deep crevice where she died. We both played multiplayer afterwards. In our run together, we got pretty far. We passed the alpine section with my help and even got through the caledera section through pure teamwork. And we even brought Bing Bong with us! When we got to the final stage, the kiln, that's where we started having problems. She told me to put Bing Bong in her bag so I could get it just in case she dies. I also had a scout effigy in my bag that I could use to revive her at any time. When we started climbing to the last stage, she had a call with her boss and she was basically preoccupied. This was on "tenderfoot" difficulty so hunger wasn't much of a problem, but it slowly ate our character's stamina bar because she was on a long call. I thought about taking Bing Bong from her bag and doing it all alone but I didn't. I eventually instructed her to jump and she did, but she took Bing Bong down with her and my heart absolutely shattered into a million pieces. I just had to grit my teeth and keep climbing. By some miracle, I actually got through it! I was able to bring back someone from the dead using the scout effigy, but Bing Bong wasn't here with us which just made things bittersweet and gave me so much regret. Someone was able to get a few achievements, including the "naturalist" one that she's been wanting for a while. We then left the call after that as it was finally someone's time to reach the end of the game. But me not taking Bing Bong left a super sour taste in my mouth. I kept playing that decision over and over. I couldn't sleep and the self-inflicted regret was eating me. So I played Peak again and I'm bringing Bing Bong with me this time. I went through the run alone. Again. And again. And again. At first, I fucked up because I swung on to the chain at the caldera section too early and I fell into lava. I was just about to invite someone back again, too. I got too hasty. I tried again AND I got to the kiln section. That's where I invited someone. She was in another meeting and was preoccupied, so I couldn't instruct her to climb up this certain ledge. I was the one who fell this time and I fucked up because I carried Bing Bong and a lot of stuff with me. Someone died shortly afterward. I decided that I wasn't going to sleep without bringing Bing Bong to the top. On my 3rd or so attempt, I was able to get through the caldera with Bing Bong in tow. I invited someone **BUT I HAD JUST REALIZED THAT I HAD PLAYED THIS RUN IN OFFLINE/SINGLEPLAYER MODE**. It was seriously such a misclick. I couldn't invite someone to this run no matter what. At this point, the sun had risen and I was so fatigued and tired, but I just said "fuck it" and kept going anyway. I felt like absolutely crying at this point. Still, I was able to bring a lot of stuff with me and I eventually got to the peak! I got Bing Bong with me and I was so scared because he almost fell through the floor when I was taking photos. But I finally got him and I got so many achievements by myself. I just powered through all of that while playing a lot of songs, first from Benson Boone and a lot of repeats from Kanye's song "Heartless" and then some of my "Programming Focus" playlist so I could "lock in." Still, I had work today and I decided to sleep for 1 hour before going to work. Thankfully, I'm super productive today and I actually did a lot of stuff. I was surprised at how awake I was at the end of my shift despite sleeping for only 3 hours overall. Work eventually finished and it was my time to play Peak again with someone and Luan. This was kind of a weird run. I somehow had forgotten a few paths that I took and a few markers. We fucked up around the alpine part trying to look for the capybaras because someone wanted to complete this "gourmand" achievement, but was unsuccessful. She fell at some part and lost Bing Bong in the process. We still pushed on and I guided them through the caldera part where they both died and I was able to bring them both alive for the kiln stage. We basically had nothing for this round aside from food and bandages. But thankfully, Luan was able to navigate some parts of the kiln and found shortcuts that I missed in my runs. He even joked that we still needed him which someone and I laughed at as I tried to pull him up from a wall near the top. Someone fell in the process because her stamina was so low and she wanted to see this new feature of seeing us as turkeys when her hunger bar got big. But she fell at the same spot where she took Bing Bong down with her in our earlier run. Still, Luan and I were able to make it through and I was able to gain 2 new achievements, which was nice. We all stopped playing after that since someone was so sleep-deprived, too. We ended up still talking and I was fully wide awake up until I finished writing my journal entry at 10 p.m. All in all, today was kind of what July was like overall. I spent a lot of time with friends and with the people that mattered, work was pretty good, and I was able to spend a lot of time just smiling and having fun despite all the stress.

Song of the day: Heartless by Kanye West

Lyrics that resonated with me:
In the night I hear 'em talk
The coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road
He lost his soul to a woman so heartless

Peak Marathon!

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was finally the day I was able to catch up with all of my past mood calendar entries for the past month. I honestly thought that things were going to go awry or that I'd fall off, but thankfully I was able to update everything **AND** post my recent adventures in Peak to my IG Story, which was nice. I had Rachel invite me to play it with her and a couple of my friends noticed it. For everything else, today was just a typical day working from home. I also found a toymaker who I can commission and I sent them what Bing Bong looked like. Work was going by smoothly and I was able to finish all of the work I had today early. Once work had died down, someone invited me to have a Peak marathon with them and Luan was so eager to play as well that he dropped everything he had doing just to play Peak with us. I had finished up with work and joined them in as well. We played for hours and the seed for today's mountain was absolutely brutal. The jungle/tropics section was the hardest part, with someone always falling/dying early in the run and losing Bing Bong. I had felt so much attachment to Bing Bong at this point that I made it into a duty to save and retrieve them when someone dies. I often fell to the bottom of the floor and had to climb up while Luan just kept walking through the jungle part. This map was totally brutal. There was one part chance were Luan was able to reach the peak but someone and I died along the way, and of course he didn't bring Bing Bong along. In the subsequent runs, we kept trying and dying. We had reached Ascent 2 by then and we were really hopeless by the end of that run because our hunger bars were too big and it stopped us from climbing up. We all died after that and we stopped playing for the day. I was still able to get into a call with someone and I'd stream some videos while she worked and did stuff in the background. I eventually told her about gifting her the plushies and she was so excited to get them. Since making 2 plushies from the same manufacturer was expensive, I just bit the bullet and bought the baby manta plushie from the official Sky shop instead. It was surprisingly cheaper and, of course, it was the real thing. Someone even joked that it was the official version and my commission piece can't do the cool things the official one can do. We continued calling until the next day.

Song of the day: I Can See You (Taylor's Version) (From The Vault) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Oh-oh, oh, oh

I can see you waitin' down the hall from me
And I could see you up against the wall with me
And what would you do? Baby, if you only knew, oh
That I could see you throw your jacket on the floor
I could see you make me want you even more
What would you do? Baby, if you only knew

Journal entry for Tuesday, July 29th, 2025

Tue, 29 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was a pretty usual day, as far as things were concerned. My gout had been significantly reduced and I was fully able to walk with my right foot again like normal. I also noticed Ailysh clean the microwave and she left it open for it to ventilate and kill all the mold inside. I felt super-better after getting a full 8 hours (and 40 minutes) worth of sleep. I got started on my work as usual and ordered some Jollibee for me in the morning so I could have something to eat throughout the day. I also did some cleaning up like throwing away the pillows outside that were just a seedbed for all of the mold, which was disgusting to throw out, but hey, someone's gotta do it. I also bought some more vinegar and thoroughly scrubbed the interior of the microwave with a sponge, dipping it in vinegar so it kills all of the mold and then ventilating it. The weather was also really nice today. For once, I'm glad that it wasn't raining like hell and that it was fairly dry outside. I don't want a wet day anymore and I'm happy with having the entire living room dry as hell. For work, nothing much happened as I just caught up on a few tickets and did some work writing some documents and stuff. One weird thing that happened was that someone and I had a slight argument over some slang that she thinks I misused and that it turned into this one big thing during lunch. We were supposed to play Peak during my lunch break but we had an argument instead. Thankfully, it wasn't anything major and I apologized first, which then made her apologize and even open up an avenue for me to vent my frustrations, because I expressed to her that I bottle up my frustrations and don't express it at all. I was surprised to have her say that she's fine hearing my frustrations and that she will apologize, too. It seemed a little too good to be true, but okay, that's cool to hear. I continued with work and didn't really mind all that until my shift ended. After work, I didn't do much aside from eat dinner with my sister and I did some minor cleaning up. I ordered 4 pieces of chicken earlier, one I ate in the morning, one for dinner, and one that my sister ate for dinner. I was surprised to have 1 more chicken leftover for tomorrow, but that was nice. Eventually, someone replied to me again and she invited me to play Peak with her. Our run this time was pretty good, although I was kind of a doomer at the first stage already. Something about this run didn't feel right, but it actually was the longest run we've done together as a duo. We got through the shore stage, then tropics/jungle, then, surprisingly, through the tundra. I died at the tundra stage but someone was able to find a way out of that miserable situation. Then we got through the caldera and went through a wrong series of rocks. Also, someone fell down deep at the caldera at the start and they almost died. She died while we were trying to get to this piece of luggage that miraculously had a first-aid kit inside. I used it on someone after saving her and we immediately got to work moving through the rocks, but I just couldn't calculate a proper way through and we ended up panicking and dying an hour into the run. I was super devastated but whatever, I just knew that we had to keep going in the next few runs. Today was nice and I liked talking, playing games with someone. It was also really nice to know that she hadn't thrown away some of the stuff I gave her, which was nice. Because of that, I decided to gift her a Bing Bong plushie and a baby manta plushie soon and that I'll be contacting toymakers to have them make it, so that I can gift it to someone soon.

Song of the day: Naengmyeon/Ice Boy by Girls' Generation

Lyrics that resonated with me:
차가워 너무나 속이시려 너무나
이빨이 너무시려
냉면 냉면 냉면
가슴이 너무시려
냉면 냉면 냉면

널보면 너무나 또 다시봐도 너무나
차디차 몸이 떨려
냉면 냉면 냉면
찔겨도 너무 찔겨
냉면 냉면 냉면
그래도 널 사랑해

Journal entry for Monday, July 28th, 2025

Mon, 28 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

The rain finally started clearing up today, it didn't rain as much as it did for the past week and I'm glad it stopped because it was honestly getting pretty annoying. I don't know how or why, but I loved the rainy season back when I was in my teens. As an adult, I truly hate it. Monday was pretty normal, for what it was worth. It was mostly me catching up with a few things at work, but it was also pretty chill as nothing much went on. I also didn't each much because someone in our house had turned off the rice cooker which the Andoks was heating up in (we couldn't use the microwave because it was still moldy). After work, I got myself some *lugaw* because I could start to feel myself getting sick and I didn't want my gout to flare up. I also got myself some stuff from Chowking, like *wonton mami* for myself while I got a *chicken lauriat* for my sister. It was a good pick-me-up and both were really nice. I got to eat and kick back while listening to some dumb Internet drama. After eating, someone invited me to play Sky with them. They had premiered the second part of The Two Embers. We did our dailies together first and we bumped into Jinn/Flame at the home island. We talked to them for a while then went on doing our dailies. One of the daily quests required us to visit Grandma's place and we were also just in time for a Grandma event. We got some free flames and someone got to talk to a few nice people over a witches cauldron. Once we were done, we went to the cinema inside Sky and watched the second part of The Two Embers! The game on my Linux PC was having issues like the video being flipped upside down and showing blank, so I moved as fast as I can to my MacBook and watched the movie there. Granted, I missed a few title cards but it was only the beginning of the movie. We eventually watched the whole thing and someone loved the baby manta in it so much. It was super cute and the movie was heartwarming. We also completed the Resourceful Recluse story afterward and it was nice to complete that mini-quest together. Someone had to abruptly leave as she had work stuff to do and I eventually went to sleep after that because I felt a bit sick.

Journal entry for Sunday, July 27th, 2025

Sun, 27 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday was pretty boring. It was just a usual day at home and I'm so sick and tired of the rain at this point. Still, things were fine enough and I bought *litson manok* from Andoks for my sister and I. I also bought Tera Fries from Potato Corner for us to eat. We both liked it, both were pretty good. I didn't really do much else aside from watching House, M.D. and passing the time on my own. My gout also returned but I immediately went to get ahead of it by taking the recommended dosage for it as soon as I noticed some slight pain in my right big toe. Also, my sister treated us to some Starbucks and I was able to drink some hot caramel macchiato, even though it's already nighttime and I didn't plan to stay up. Still, it was nice of her to buy something for us.

Song of the day: Lost The Breakup by Maisie Peters

12 hours deeply asleep

Sat, 26 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

I slept for 12 hours! My Apple Watch says that I slept for **12 straight hours**. What a shocker. To be fair, I know I'd have to repay my sleep debt, which was fine because I needed to sleep that much anyway after staying up for an all-nighter. I'm just glad that someone left me alone for the night and day. I also saw some mold inside the microwave which was honestly disgusting and kind of disappointing. I asked my sister to clean it since she does the chores in the house as I pay for all the bills and groceries. Since I had nothing better to do and since I didn't want to stay at home with all of the mold and shit, I just decided to spend the day at my favorite Starbucks, the one at 32nd Street in BGC. I got a seat at the long couch there and I ordered my usual hot white chocolate. I also got myself their chicken sandwich, which was nice. I spent the entire afternoon there and evening, too! It was a craze because I sometimes had to get up and use the bathroom, but I had to keep my seat occupied so I had to bring my MacBook with me (it's new, I don't want to get it stolen). I placed my umbrella and Ailysh's running bag (from Tuesday) on the table so that no one else would occupy it. For what it was worth, it worked, and no one claimed my seat. My time was mostly spent on catching up with a bulk of the mood calendar entries and fixing things for my website. It was nice to see a lot of progress made and I'm super glad to have taken out the silver MacBook out for a spin again. I didn't have dinner after that and just went home after midnight and I was luckily able to book a ride home and get home safely while not being drenched in the rain.

Song of the day: SWICY by UNIS

Lyrics that resonated with me:
사르르르 Swicy
사르르르르르 Sweet & Spicy
사르르르 Swicy
너를 홀릴 My recipe

사르르르 Swicy
사르르르르르 Sweet & Spicy
자꾸 끌려 넌- Ah ha

33+ hours wide awake

Fri, 25 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday started with me agreeing to keep someone company through the entire night, even though that was supposed to be for later today, not right at this night. But I pushed through and called in a favor for me next month to offset the stress. I got myself a coffee from McDonald's as well as a few other things like nuggets and a Big Mac which I've been wanting to eat. But someone stopped me because she hasn't eaten yet and I just offered to order her something since I had some spare money and I kind of missed staying up late with them and eating with them, even though it was usually me ordering for the both of us. I had to wait while someone got her food, which took a while and even the driver got mad at me because I was stalling them. Someone couldn't get their delivery because they were in a meeting, but thankfully someone in their house was able to get it and we were both able to eat for a bit, even though my food was kind of cold at this point. We didn't really talk much or it wasn't anything noteworthy because I don't remember much of what happened. All I know was that someone was mostly in meetings the whole night. We did watch a few horror videos on YouTube and they showed me the kittens at one point throughout the night, so that was cool. Our call eventually ended around 9 a.m. or so and that's when I got ready to go to work. Thankfully, work wasn't all that tiring and I just had to complete a few things and keep up with a few tickets. I was even awake enough to still be talking to someone during my free time and we both suggested a few K-dramas for us to watch when we can. It quickly passed by and nothing much happened. I did play some Eminem throughout the day to keep me motivated to push through. Eventually, I got through the workday and ended Friday on a good note. It was nighttime and I was already asleep come 9 p.m., and I honestly got the well-needed sleep after that.

Song of the day: The Monster by Eminem, Rihanna

It's Fant4stic!

Thu, 24 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Venice Cineplex, Venice Grand Canal Mall

Today was my usual day at work and in the morning. Nothing noteworthy happened during those times so I just passed the time just doing work. Someone didn't talk to me much either so I figured that I would just book a ticket to watch The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025) in Venice later. I also realized it yesterday while playing Peak that yesterday was the premier date of the movie, but I somehow didn't watch it. I figured that watching it today was a good a time as any, plus I didn't want to spend my weekends watching this or trying to watch this, so I went for today. After work, I played Peak with someone for a bit and we tried our best to climb up, but we couldn't make it past the jungle stage. We just died there since it was hopeless anyway, plus it was almost 8:20 p.m. and I had to leave by that time. Thankfully, I was able to book a ride there after several attempts, but I was a bit worried because I got a Move It ride and I read that they weren't very safe, which kind of spooked me. Thankfully, it didn't rain much on my way there because I was honestly almost out of outdoor clothes. Too bad I was short 2 Pesos because my Move It wasn't linked to any of my digital accounts and I had to pay by cash, but the driver was cool with it. I got in as the movie was just starting and I was early enough because I had a few trailers to sit through. Eventually, the movie started and I watched the film! It was so much fun and it was really hype. I haven't watched such a fun, upbeat superhero in a while and July's superhero movies were really worth the wait as both Superman (2025) and The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025) were really good. I booked a ride home afterward and I thought I would get some sleep by the time that I arrive home. But I was just chilling until midnight and then someone asked me to accompany them for their entire work today, this night, instead. It honestly surprised me and I thought for sure I was going back to my old habits of killing myself, but whatever. I just got myself coffee and accompanied someone for the entire night.

Song of the day: Gnarly by KATSEYE

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Oh, we're going out tonight, gang, gang

Lethal Company Again and Almost at the Peak!

Wed, 23 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Nothing noteworthy happened in the morning and for work so my time during those periods really just passed by. But after my shift, someone invited me to a game of Lethal Company with Luan because he missed it. I installed it and played with them for a few rounds before we decided to go and play Peak again. This run started like any other typical run and I even thought it was a doomed run because someone poisoned me at the start. This ticked me off a bit so I killed my character by getting fully poisoned and dying, not speaking much for the first stage. Luan also died at the first stage so it was just someone carrying us both at the top. She brought along the plushie in the game, Bing Bong, and someone was able to revive us at the end of the first stage. I was honestly pretty ticked off but I just decided to not speak much because I was still frustrated. We kept going and I scouted out a spot/way for us to climb up the jungle stage and we all surprisingly made it. Next was the tundra stage which we usually die to or have severe difficulties in getting over. But we were able to get through a massive chasm by using a chain launcher to get across a piece of ice and using an anti-gravity rope to get us up a difficult wall. Someone was still carrying Bing Bong in her inventory during the past runs. We get to the cauldron stage and that's where it finally gets serious for me. My mind was entirely locked in since this stage. It was the first time us 3 got through the tundra stage with everyone alive so it was honestly serious that we could have a shot at reaching the peak with us 3 still alive. We push through the several mountains and islands of rocks across the lava pool and we eventually got through the cauldron stage! We unpack the various luggage at the start and I take a photo of someone holding Bing Bong out while we were unpacking the luggage. ONE LAST STAGE REMAINED BETWEEN US AND THE PEAK. It was time for us to go through the kiln and get up the volcano interior to reach the Peak. Luan had to AFK for a while before starting which honestly took up a while and made our hunger bar larger but we pushed through. We then kept climbing up until we had to use the Bugle of Friendship to get to the top. Someone was playing the bugle while me and Luan climbed up. Unfortunately, someone didn't have enough stamina to climb up and she couldn't reach the rope even though Luan tried setting it. I tried to grab her while she was climbing but then fell and died, which honestly broke my heart. Someone also didn't have a chance so she just brought out Bing Bong and jumped to their death. It was honestly soul crushing to see someone die with Bing Bong. We then spectated Luan as he had a piton in his inventory which could have helped and a lollipop in his bag. It honestly broke my heart because we could have made it out as 3 but this horrible twist of fate just had to happen. I felt like my heart was crushed or that I had just been broken up with. In the end, Luan boards the chopper and left us to die, including Bing Bong. It left a bittersweet taste in my mouth but someone was still game to play and we played a few rounds of Lethal Company afterward. It was okay, but it wasn't as fun as the accomplishment we could have gotten if we had just gotten to the peak with us 3 complete. It was a shame, but I honestly had a lot of fun and days like this remain a treasure to me.

It's been more than a while!

Tue, 22 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Starbucks - San Antonio Parañaque

I was feeling really horrible in the morning so I had to call it off from work. I just slept the morning off because I didn't feel okay. But eventually, I woke up feeling better and actually just in time to buy Hatsune Miku tickets for my sister and I. It was totally expensive but it seemed like a waste because the more expensive VIP seats were all sold out! I wanted to get a closer seat to see Hatsune Miku! It's such a shame, and I tried to get in on the tickets early but I overslept a bit. Whatever, I just sucked it up and bought tickets for my sister and I. After that, I planned on meeting someone and she told me to go to the Starbucks nearby so we can play Sky on our MacBooks there, I also planned on giving her the PSP there, too. I booked a car ride there because I didn't want to get more sick and I didn't want to go through the horrible way. The Grab ride eventually arrived and I was sitting comfortably inside **WHEN I REALIZED THAT I FORGOT TO BRING THE DAMN PLAYSTATION PORTABLE!!!** I just realized **IN THE CAR RIDE** that I **FORGOT THE PSP**. Goddamn it, I was in such a rush that I forgot the main thing I was going to give her. I didn't forget my MacBook, but sure, I totally forgot the PSP. So, while in the car, I booked a Grab Express delivery from my house to the Starbucks and I had my sister package it up. I only booked the ride when I know for sure that the car was going to get to the Starbucks first. The car eventually did get there but the flood was so high there, it was crazy and I had to take a picture of it. Thankfully, the car arrives there and I find a good sofa seat, I also got myself a hot coffee drink and a cookie. I was able to get the PSP shortly afterward and all was well. I also noticed that Ailysh placed the PSP in her running bag. I just had to wait for someone to arrive and she took a while because she had several attempts to go out but had to come back due to the harsh rain. Eventually she arrives and it was just an okay greeting. We haven't met in-person for months and even almost a year, but things were pretty usual between us. Someone sits next to me and gets her drink while she also sets her MacBook up and we just talk for a good while. We play Sky for a bit with our DualSense controllers and, while she had some pairing problems, we were able to work it out and play Sky together there. I took a few pictures because this meetup was literally unbelievable months ago or even a month ago in early June. Here was me, playing Sky with someone, at a Starbucks on a rainy day. It was honestly unbelievable and sounded a bit dreamlike, but this really happened. Someone and I talk and the time passes quickly for me, which is weird because she felt that it passed slowly for her. I showed her my iPhone 16 Pro Max and she calls it a girly phone because it looks pink and has some ILLIT plastic-sticker-thing at the back. We also talk about a few things and she says that her mother's asking if I could get her something, to which I agree. Eventually, it was starting to get late so I order some stuff for someone's mom before she goes back. Then some random guy comes in with 2 girls with him. That guy honestly looks like someone I know, like he's my former orgmate in college. I message him on Instagram but didn't receive a reply. I whisper to someone that I think I know that dude and I just keep looking at him. Then when I try to sit next to someone, he looks at me and says my name. I couldn't believe it! **IT WAS HIM!** Holy shit. I haven't seen this dude in years! To think that I would meet him, at a time like this, at a random-ass Starbucks that I don't even visit, **ON A RAINY DAY WHERE THERE ARE BARELY ANY PEOPLE OUT** is just insane. After this, someone eventually leaves and heads back to her house to rest and they invite me to play Sky later. Me and the dude catch up about life after college. I told him that I'm still in IT and formerly did DevOps but was still into DevOps. He gets interested so I tell him more about it and how, honestly, it has a lot of money in it. Then we talk about the various things he's done after college, his programming stints, and a Lazada shop he made during the pandemic. He catches me up on a lot of things and also tells me that the girl he sits across to was his fiancee, which was honestly kind of a pain to hear because even the people I haven't caught up with are getting married and moving on to the next stage in their life. It was really nice to catch up with him and talk shop. After a while, I booked for a ride home while still talking to him. He and his family members eventually leave but I thankfully book a ride home shortly after. The Grab rider asks me to buy a drink for him, which I was hesitant because I honestly believed that he wouldn't pay me back. I still bit the bullet and got him a drink because I really wanted to go home and it was getting late. Thankfully, he did pay me although I just asked him to pay 200 even though the drink costed 300 Pesos with his extra 2 shots. Whatever, it was fine and wasn't much of a loss. The driver tells me that he's been sleeping in his car for a few days now and he usually just does this because his province is far away from here. Thankfully I got home safe and I still had enough time in the day to play a round of Peak with someone and Luan before the day ended.

Song of the day: SWICY by UNIS

I hate the rain

Mon, 21 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

It was still raining a lot today and the entire living room was just soaked in rain, including the hallway. It was honestly kind of a mess because we don't have tarpaulin anymore to cover our living room, so it was just soaked and the floor was wet and sticky, which was just gross. I didn't like the rainy weather at all, even though I liked it a lot as a kid. I had a package delivered from Mom which I had a hard time carrying into the house considering how wet everything was, but I'm glad my cousin helped me carry it upstairs. For the rest of the day, work continued until it ended. In the evening, I played Sky with someone since it's the start of a new season! I bought myself the seasons pass bundle and gave someone the first seasons pass gift. We did our dailies in Sky and we checked out some of the new events. It was the premier of Sky's new movie: The Two Embers. We checked out the new event first, which was the one about the Tender Toymaker and the story was pretty cute. Then we watched the first part of the movie which was super touching to us. It was super cute and we loved the baby manatee. We played around and then went back to complete the quest again because we wanted to see the things they had in the shop. Someone saw a hair piece that they really wanted to get so they spent some money to buy that new hair piece and hairstyle. We called it a day after that.

Song of the day: Raining in Manila by Lola Amour

Lyrics that resonated with me:
It's been raining in Manila, hindi ka ba nilalamig?
And it's been raining in Manila, hindi ka ba nilalamig?
But if it's raining in Manila, hindi kita maririnig
(Nakahiga, mag-isang nanginginig)
So I'll be waiting in Manila kahit 'di ka na babalik

Maulan ba sa inyo 'pag bumubuhos dito?
Paumanhin, at mukhang hindi ko
Masasabayan ang 'yong yapak sa pagngiti at pag-iyak
Sa paglipad at pagbagsak ng araw-araw
Sa pagpikit na lang kita matititigan sa mata
Sa panaginip na magpapaligaw

Kamusta ka na? Kahit 'wag nang sagutin
'Di ba nawala ang kintab ng bituin?
Sana gano'n ka nga pa rin

Journal entry for Sunday, July 20th, 2025

Sun, 20 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much went on today aside from me feeling a bit sick and tired of all the rain recently. I was thinking of going out to buy someone's PSP but I went on Facebook Marketplace and ordered to buy from a guy who was able to deliver it instead. It seemed like a scam until I actually got the item and it was a legit PSP. Thankfully, I didn't lose someone's money to a scam and all's well that ends well.

Song of the day: Fortnight (feat. Post Malone) by Taylor Swift

Journal entry for Saturday, July 19th, 2025

Sat, 19 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: SM Megamall

I started the day accompanying someone for her work which led me to having almost zero sleep at all. I don't recall much from our call either, which I guess was pretty much filler for the time. Still, I got to see her on call and have some company to talk to the entire night, which was nice. In the morning, I had to get ready even though it was raining hard as hell. It looked like my hangout with Max and Meryll was going to push through so I just had to go through with it. I was able to book a ride and then I was the first to arrive. I was just at Starbucks and then Max arrived. We talked for a while and eventually met up with Meryll and her boyfriend who was tagging along with us. We didn't do much aside from just talk, walk around, buy that matcha mochi that we've been wanting to try. We also ate at Pepper Lunch, which was funny because I ate here, at Pepper Lunch in SM Megamall, 1 week ago and I ordered the exact dish as I did last week. We also watched Superman (2025) because Meryll and Max haven't seen it, but me and Meryll's boyfriend have already watched it. We still watched it regardless and Max had some... strong reactions with Lex Luthor. But I guess I just got used to comically-evil bad guys because I watch so many comic book movies and shows, that it's normal at this point. When all was said and done, we at some salads for dinner. I had to choose between bread with ice cream filling or macarons. I was choosing between the two but went with macarons instead, and funnily enough, Meryll made the decision to get macarons after I had them. We all just looked out at the Fantastic Four installation nearby while eating before we all went to the bathroom and went our separate ways. For going home, I was able to book an Angkas ride home, even though it was extremely rainy. It was the only one I could take since I couldn't book a car home so I just had to thug it out. The driver gave me a raincoat to wear, so that helped me a bit. I got home safe, thankfully, and I just chilled for whatever minutes the day had left.

Song of the day: Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA

Failed Five Stars!

Fri, 18 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Peri-Peri Charcoal Chicken, Glorietta

Today was once again a day in the office but, thankfully (and sadly), it would be my final day in the office for the month. Today actually started with me and someone still playing, but I eventually went to sleep after that. Thankfully, I wasn't super late to the office and I got there relatively on time. It was just my coworker and I, just like yesterday, and it was your usual day in the office for me. Nothing much went on and we had lunch at Peri-Peri Charcoal Chicken in Glorietta. I ordered their dynamite (which was superior than Señor Pollo's one, sorry), their chicken skin which I missed, and I had their new menu selection which my coworker also got. We mostly talked about their time and experience in the company, and it shocked me to hear that there were salary reductions when they entered. It honestly put a lot of fear into me but they reassured me that it only happened once and they haven't seen it happen again. We kept eating and I eventually ordered my dynamite and chicken skin as take-out. After that we went back to the office and work went on as usual. In the afternoon, I was kind of bored so I went out to get some *merienda* alone and I got Dairy Queen. I also called someone during this time because I wanted to talk to them and have them watch as I do some spins in Genshin. It was super painful because I kept spinning and spinning for this Genshin archon, Mavuika. I kept topping up and adding more and more money, but I ultimately didn't get her even after spending 6,000 Pesos on spins. I kind of regret not getting the 5,000 Pesos worth of spins since I would've gotten so much more for that, but whatever. I also toured someone on how I entered my workplace building and she says that it looked so futuristic. It was also dumb of me because I spilled some Dairy Queen on the way there. My mobile signal also got cut off while in the elevator so someone didn't really see me enter my workplace. I was still in a call with her and did a few spins while eating my Dairy Queen in the office pantry and she eventually asked me to stop after spending so much money on spins. I did get a 5-star character, and it was Dehya, which I didn't like at all because she didn't fit in any of my team compositions. But whatever, we played some Genshin and I showed her Wanderer's boss fight and she was a bit interested in facing off against them. We ended the call after that and I went back to my desk to finish my work for the week. For the remainder of the day, I met up with my sister because we were working in the same building today, surprisingly enough. We had dinner and I suggested Peri-Peri again, and I ordered dynamite again but I didn't get a sharing bundle. We both got the dish my coworker and I ordered earlier and my sister liked it! After that, she mostly shared about her day and what happened at her work. She was mostly fine, albeit a bit rattled over what to do/feel on what happened earlier. I tell her that it's fine and we finish our food and I get the dynamite for take-out. I bought her a few books at the newly-opened Fully Booked nearby and I bought Diary of a Wimpy Kid 2: Roderick Rules for myself. I book us both a car for our ride home and, thankfully, we got home safe and alright. Since it was a Friday, I stayed up late with someone and got into a call with her that lasted all night, even though I had to meet up with my friends the next day.

Song of the day: Red Wine Supernova by Chappell Roan

A Walk to Señor Pollo and We're Back in Genshin!

Thu, 17 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Señor Pollo, Legazpi Village

Today was another day in the office for me and I got there relatively okay. My sister also ordered some McDonald's for us and I just had it placed inside her lunch box which I brought to the office. It was just my coworker and I there and since I was close to them, I left my assigned seat to sit next to them and talk while my shift went on. We had lunch out and, thankfully, we went out for lunch early. They asked me what my favorite chicken restaurant was and I had a few in mind, we ultimately decided on going to their favorite chicken restaurant, Señor Pollo. It was a bit of a walk away, but I didn't mind the walk there and figured it was good exercise. We took a while to get there, but we eventually made it and it didn't take us an hour to walk there, thankfully. We got seated and ate some chicken, and the sides were really good. They also had their own version of dynamite, which tasted nice, but it was too spicy for us to finish there. But the chicken and the sauces were so good. It honestly shaped up to be one of my favorite chicken places. I had my leftover dynamite for take-out and we went back to the office. Thankfully, nothing big happened that I missed and I just continued my shift and finished eating the McDonald's and the leftover dynamite. Before going home, my coworker was having a hard time opening their locker because their biometric lock wouldn't work. I recognized this lock from McNally's videos and I remembered that this can be easily opened with brute force. I decided to try it out for myself and hit it with my metal water bottle. My coworker didn't believe me and he thought that it would be too loud, but I eventually got it opened and he was in complete shock when I opened it. After that, we both eventually went home and I was able to book a ride despite the rain. In the evening, I played Peak with someone and I helped her recover her old Genshin account. She still remembered her password but it kept asking her to verify her account with an old Gmail account that she doesn't remember. We first tried recovering her old Gmail account, but it didn't work. So we just tried logging into her Hoyoverse, but it couldn't go through for her. I tried logging in instead and I was able to log in and change her email. We played Genshin afterwards, after years of not playing it, and my level was enough to join her world and we fought the same-level enemies together. We had a difficult time fighting Childe but we eventually got the hang of it. We also had enough time to watch a few caving videos on YouTube like we used to. All in all, today was super fun and extra, but I didn't feel exhausted at all in the end.

Song of the day: Mystical Magical by Benson Boone

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Once you know what my love's gonna feel like
Nothing else will feel right, you can feel like
Moonbeam ice cream, taking off your blue jeans
Dancing at the movies, 'cause it feels so

Mystical, magical
Oh, baby, 'cause once you know, once you know
My love is so mystical, magical
Oh, baby, 'cause once you know, once you know

New Permanent Work Seat

Wed, 16 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I planned to go to the office today because I want to complete my required on-site days. I commuted to work as usual and I got told that I was then assigned to be seated somewhere, which was nice that I wasn't placed as far from my coworkers. But I was kind of scared since I got seated at the front of an executive's office. I spent most of the day alone because my usual coworkers weren't here and it was only their team leader and one of their teammates who I'm not close to. It was kind of awkward because I had to manuever myself out of their vision and I mostly remained seated as to not make the situation awkward. I usually sat next to them but I didn't for today and it was a nice decision because their row eventually got filled up with other people who needed the seat more than me. I just had lunch by myself, had llaollao, and went home early because I had several meetings in the evening. For the evening, I played Peak with someone before attending my meetings. I went to sleep after that.

Song of the day: 5 Years Time - Sun Sun Sun by Noah And The Whale

Journal entry for Tuesday, July 15th, 2025

Tue, 15 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty boring and nothing much went on. I went to work as usual and had fun talking to someone. Today, we made a pact to gift the other a "pro" version of whatever Apple device when one of us gets married first. I told her that I'm looking forward to getting a MacBook Pro from her when she gets married, and we both placed our signatures on it. Aside from that, we had a bit of a spat about siblings ordering stuff for each other being a norm, but it wasn't that much of an argument. I eventually slept after that.

Song of the day: Join Us for a Bite by JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I lost it long ago, you're not alone, baby

Can't wait to meet you
So join the animatronic family
We open real soon
Try your best to hold on to sanity
Come get to know me
And you won't want to leave after tonight
Down here, we're lonely
And we would love you to join us for a bite

Superman!

Mon, 14 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal Mall

I'm glad that my gout was fully gone today but I was still kind of frustrated because I didn't watch Superman (2025). I eventually just decided on a whim to finally watch Superman today. I bought ticket and had planned to watch it at my usual, favorite place to watch movies: Venice Grand Canal Mall. For the rest of the day, nothing much went on aside from me going through my usual day at work and then talking to someone on the sidelines. In the evening, I went to Venice and ate at the KFC there for dinner. I tried that new spicy, cheesy bowl that someone recommended and it was pretty good. I got a Zinger as well, but I was honestly too full to eat both. After that, I was just in time to watch Superman and I watched the film. It was pretty fun! I actually liked James Gunn's portrayal of Superman and it was honestly the first standalone Superman movie I've watched in theaters. I didn't watch any of the Superman movies in theaters back in the 2010s so watching this one was pretty fun. It also felt very relevant, which was a nice touch. Overall, I liked it and it was such a nice entry into the new DC movie universe. I liked one of the songs in the movie and kept playing it on loop in the commute home.

Song of the day: 5 Years Time - Sun Sun Sun by Noah And The Whale

Lyrics that resonated with me:
In five years time, I might not know you
In five years time, we might not speak
In five years time, we might not get along
In five years time, you might just prove me wrong

Journal entry for Sunday, July 13th, 2025

Sun, 13 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: SM Megamall

For today, nothing much went on aside from my sister and I planning to have her Samsung Galaxy Watch taken in for warranty and to have it fixed. We settled on SM Megamall because it was the only support center that was reasonably open and it was in a good-enough place. We both separately commuted to SM Megamall and we got there okay. We both ate first at Pepper Lunch and then we went to the repair center. It took us a while to find it because, apparently, it was inside the Samsung store itself! It was so hard and confusing to find, but eventually we were able to get a ticket. We waited quite a long while to get it serviced. **We waited more than 2 hours for us to be able to get it in for warranty.** It was such a long while, but I'm glad I brought my MacBook so I was able to do some work while waiting. We went to Power Mac Center after that so I could buy an AirTag for my bag and then we went downstairs to eat at Panda Express. We went home shortly after that and I got to enjoy a day out with my sister for what it's worth. I wasn't able to watch Superman (2025), though, which kinda sucks. But I enjoyed my day out with my sister and I'm glad we got her Galaxy Watch in for repair while it was still under warranty.

Song of the day: 360 by Charli xcx

Journal entry for Saturday, July 12th, 2025

Sat, 12 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

Today started with me accompanying someone through her working hours. We were still in a call on Discord and we talked about a lot of things. She also showed me the kittens that she's taking care of, which were cute. I was still not used to seeing her with black hair, which was still a nice surprise. We kept talking and talking all throughout the night and it was genuinely nice to hear her say that it was nice to talk to me again. Her shift eventually finished and we stopped talking at around 7 a.m. or so. I had told her that I just planned to code and do some stuff at my favorite place in BGC, which was Starbucks 32nd Street, and I slept after that. I followed through with going to Starbucks even though my foot wasn't fully healed. It was walkable enough for me to walk comfortably around and bring my MacBook along with me. It was really nice to go to Starbucks with the "right" MacBook now. I was able to do some work like switching over to my own fork of Material Color Utilities and publishing that as an NPM package, which was pretty nice as I plan to use the updated fork in my Material 3 Expressive update. Unfortunately, I didn't stay there for long as I eventually had to go home to play games and be in a call with someone. I played Sky with them and we played Peak with Luan. After that, we played a few rounds of Buckshot Roulette where they both teamed up on me for a round or so. It was all pretty fun and I got to keep talking with someone about her feelings and a few things she's anxious about.

Song of the day: Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA

Up All Night

Fri, 11 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

My foot still hurts but I had to suck it up again today because I'm still determined to go back to the office. I commuted there and it wasn't as painful as yesterday, but I still had that funny limp in my walk because my foot wasn't 100% okay. I got to the office but I didn't have lunch with my coworkers and instead had lunch alone. I had Subway for lunch and I ate it in the office lunchroom while talking to someone. Work passed by as usual and I was still able to go out with my coworkers for *merienda* and we ate at SM Makati and NYFD, which was nice because we just got to chill and talk about work matters and previous work experiences, with Jimmy telling us about his past office encounters, which was funny. After work, I went to SM Makati to buy groceries and I was honestly impressed because I was able to carry heavy groceries despite having a painful gout attack. I booked a Grab ride home and I was talking to someone while on the way home. When I got home, she tells me to accompany her all night and I did accompany her until the morning like we used to back in 2024.

Song of the day: HOT TO GO! by Chappell Roan

Journal entry for Thursday, July 10th, 2025

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

My gout still hurts and my foot still is a pain to walk on, but fuck it, I just sucked it up and decided to go to the office. I had to commute there via Angkas and it was such a pain getting off the motorcycle. Walking for the first few minutes to the office felt like absolute hell and I had such a weird walk, which was extremely noticeable. Eventually, I got to the office and took a few painkillers as well as my meds. Work eventually started and things were pretty okay, work-wise. I had some pain from my gout, but I just endured it since I was already in the office. I had lunch out with my coworkers and we ate at Sukiya, and the walk there was a bit painful and I told them about my gout, which they were shocked to hear because I'm still pretty young to have it. I didn't eat much because my appetite was mostly gone because I felt some pain in my foot, so I just had my food for take-out. We went back to the office after that. For the rest of the afternoon, I didn't do much and had some free time. I played the expanded version of Veil of Eternity with my coworkers and it was pretty fun. I had so much fun playing the expanded version and it wasn't that hard to play as it only added a few new characters. We played Unmatched after that and I picked Sun Wukong because I remember him from that game named Black Myth Wukong. I won a round, thankfully, and we played for a few more rounds after that. It was pretty fun and I enjoyed our playthrough before we had to walk back to our desks to finish our work. I went home after work and played some Sky with someone before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Everything at Once by Lenka

A Black MacBook for a Silver MacBook

Wed, 09 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

My foot was still hurting so much because of my gout and I had originally planned to go to work today, but I didn't push through it on account of the pain in my foot. I just worked from home and got my usual stuff done. Despite my gout, I had planned to meet up a person who was exchanging their MacBook. It only had 2 charge cycles and was just bought on July 1, while mine had 8 charge cycles already. I felt bad trading away my own, first-ever bought MacBook, but I just had to trade it away because black is such a horrible color. Thankfully, the guy isn't asking much for us to swap because it's practically the same MacBook, just with a different color. I met up with him in BGC, thankfully it wasn't far and I got there fairly quickly. It was a bit of a pain walking around, but I'm glad I got dropped off nearby and I didn't have to walk far. I met the guy exchanging his laptop and he tells me that he actually does this "professionally" and it sounded interesting to me. I removed my Apple account from my MacBook and I got my account set up on the new, silver MacBook. I was a bit paranoid and worried that he still has his Apple account in this new MacBook, but I had to quell those thoughts because he didn't have an Apple account in this one when he exchanged it to me. All of my fears were eventually quelled when I saw this MacBook pop up in my iCloud and Find My app. After that, I played Sky with someone and we took a few pics together while in the event place in the Aviary Village. We stopped playing after that and I enjoyed my time with the new MacBook.

Song of the day: Starving by Hailee Steinfeld

A Gouty Comeback

Tue, 08 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

My gout came back today and I didn't mind it much for most of the day, which was a mistake because I should have taken my medicine instead of not paying attention to it. I'm pretty sure that the sausage from yesterday was what caused it to come back because it was the only new thing that I ate that was out of the ordinary. I continued through the day and work passed by just fine. But my right big toe started hurting pretty badly. Regardless, I still played Peak with someone since she invited me to play together. We also played Supermarket Together and I put my foot down to cancel the pain, but it just got worse and my right foot had swollen up completely. It was so painful by the end of our playthrough, I was in so much pain. I went to bed after that and I just took some colchicin and raised my foot while sleeping.

Song of the day: Baba O'Riley by The Who

Properly Back in Sky!

Mon, 07 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was a usual day for me. I was working from home and nothing much went on for my shift. But after my shift, someone invited me to play Sky with them again and we both fully got back into Sky. We even made a new friend named Elkie who was in her 20s. She was Chinese and was super friendly. I tried playing from my bed, which was a total pain because I had to set up my controller and keyboard. I eventually got everything working but we stopped playing Sky for the day shortly after that. We played Peak again with Luan in the evening and it was pretty fun, but we didn't get past the lava stage. We downloaded this new game called Buckshot Roulette on Steam and I immediately got the hang of it. It was so much like a card game. I also ate dinner today which was sisig and then sausage. It was so fun eating and then playing Buckshot Roulette with someone and Luan. I won a few games but it was ultimately a tie between me and Luan on the most wins. We still had a lot of time left in the late evening so someone and I joined a call and they made us watch K-Pop Demon Hunters (2025) on Netflix. They have already watched it before, but wanted me to watch it, too. It was pretty nice and I liked some of the songs, even though it felt a bit short for me. I still enjoyed it and someone sang a lot of the songs in the movie. Today was super fun and I enjoyed a lot of what happened today.

Song of the day: Don't Go Breaking My Heart by Elton John, Kiki Dee

Journal entry for Sunday, July 6th, 2025

Sun, 06 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I had nothing planned today and I eventually woke up late, but a person from my ISP came over by the house to install our new router and a set-top box which was basically just an Android TV box. We had "cable" in the house again after a long while and it was pretty nice to watch some Philippine TV channels. We also got our older router replaced and the speeds on the new router were insane, especially on Wi-Fi powered devices. I also got to change the password on the router, which was a long overdue task because my cousins TV downstairs used to connect to our Wi-Fi. For the rest of the evening, there wasn't much to do as I just rested and enjoyed the new router. It was a pretty productive weekend overall.

Song of the day: Gabriela by KATSEYE

All Health Checks Cleared!

Sat, 05 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

I had plans today to visit the dentist to have my teeth get checked up. I also found a dentist that accepted my HMO and I had my teeth cleaned for free, which was super nice. I had to pay 1,000 out of my pocket because my teeth had some dirt that somehow wasn't covered by the HMO. But whatever, it was fine and I still got my teeth cleaned. It was super painful, by the way. It honestly felt like my teeth were being "downloaded" because the entire operation sounded like some downloading operation. It was super painful but I'm glad I got through it. The dentist also checked my teeth and it was just your usual, run-of-the-mill **gingivitis**. Thankfully, it wasn't some health problem because I had a lowered immune system from HIV. I breathed a large sigh of relief when the fix was just some over-the-counter drug named Orahex. My next stop was this public health clinic in Taguig because they offered free HIV tests. But when I got there, it was closed. I went to another clinic that had it and they said that it was only available for pregnant ladies. I went to Vista Mall to buy Orahex and I decided to find another clinic. The weather was kind of rainy, but I was already outside, so I didn't want to waste my efforts and decided to get an HIV test, even if I'll have to pay for it myself. I found a clinic in Makati and it was thankfully close to Ayala Avenue. I paid for my HIV test and admitted my sexual history to the doctor and then I got the test itself done. Thankfully, it's the latest version of the test and it was only a quick 10-minute finger prick. I waited for what felt like eternity and, by my sheer fucking luck, it turned out **negative**. Negative. A negative fucking HIV test. It's good that I got a test around the proper time, too, so that was nice. But wow, I just felt so light after taking that test *and* having a negative result. I then walked to the Starbucks downstairs and had a cookie and some matcha, which was really nice. I talked to my Mom about it and she scolded me, but ultimately understood and was kind of glad (I think) of my negative result. I walked through the Dela Rosa Walkway and got a footlong sandwich from the Subway we used to visit back when we were working in Makati in 2020. I kept walking and passed by Greenbelt Chapel and decided to go there to thank God for all that they've done for me recently: from the wishes being granted, my HIV result being negative, and things being generally okay. Somehow, while praying, a mass had started and I enjoyed the entirety of it and then booked a ride home. I just ate the Subway sandwich and chilled for the rest of the evening.

Song of the day: 360 by Charli xcx

Journal entry for Friday, July 4th, 2025

Fri, 04 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today I pushed myself to still go to the office and I got there okay. I worked through my normal shift and I also ate with my coworkers for lunch. I had Paotsin and I was talking to someone, and they had told me that they would be gone for the day, and I wished them well. I continued eating lunch with my coworkers and I had to run back to the office afterwards. In the afternoon, I had a lot of free time and had *merienda* with my coworkers. I also bought myself a new Hatsune Miku mouse and some cables. I went home pretty much afterwards and rested for the day.

Song of the day: Neverita by Bad Bunny

Journal entry for Thursday, July 3rd, 2025

Thu, 03 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I called in sick from work today and I was too tired to go to the office today, which kind of ruined my plan to go to work for 4 days straight this week. I just rested at home and chilled for the rest of the day. Since I had nothing to do, in the late afternoon, I played Cuphead with someone. I also played some of those "Guess the Taylor Swift Song" game and we played for a while, which was super fun. I got an early start but someone eventually got more points that me, but it was super fun. They also made me play this new game called Dollmere, which was super scary and creepy. We eventually left while I haven't completed my playthrough and I slept after that.

The Peak!

Wed, 02 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was another day in the office and nothing noteworthy really went on today. I had Burger King in the morning and just ate breakfast there while listening to KATSEYE's "Gabriela" because someone and I listened to it a few days ago. I went back to the office after that and I just chilled in the office for a while. I was still mostly full from Burger King. In the afternoon, I had some time to kill and I was talking to someone by then. She asked me to play Sky: Children of the Light again with them and we logged back in together after a long time. We mostly just talked, played for a while, and we had fun walking around and collecting candle flames around the Hidden Forest. We only played for a while and I noticed my phone get noticeably hot even though it was the latest iPhone, which kind of surprised me because I thought that my phone can handle this game's graphics, but it even struggled. Oh well, I went back to my workstation to finish my remaining tasks for the day and then booked a ride home afterward. When I got home, I got into a call with someone and we played Peak again with Luan. I ordered food from Sinigang Express with my sister and I ate while playing Peak. We actually died in the first few stages and someone and I had to wait by the sidelines while Luan went on and tried to figure things out. He eventually reached the lava stage, which was after the tundra stage (and we were having a difficult time going through it), and I was able to rejoin him at the end before the volcano stage. We both climbed up and someone got to join but she got resurrected at the start of the lava stage and she wasn't able to get through it. So, for the remainder of the climb, she was just a ghost who tagged along and helped us climb. It was honestly exhilarating and our climb was kind of difficult, but we were able to get through it to reach the peak, which was the game's title. For the rest of the evening, I stayed with someone on call. They showed me a few parts of this new musical that she likes named Epic. She made me listen to it for a few hours and the story was pretty nice.

Song of the day: Gabriela by KATSEYE

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Hands off, Gabriela, Gabriela
Hands off, Gabriela-la-la
Back off of my fella, Gabriela
Back off, Gabriela-la-la
'Cause, ooh
You could have anyone else you wanted to
I'm begging you (Hey)
Hands off, Gabriela, Gabriela
Hands off, Gabriela-la-la, la-la-la-la

Journal entry for Tuesday, July 1st, 2025

Tue, 01 Jul 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

For July, I want to have my mandatory days in the office fully rendered out early in the month because I'm expecting it to be a rainy month. I honestly don't want to get trapped by being "at risk" for my mandatory days so I went with trying to fulfill the days as early as I can. I went to the office and today was a pretty chill day. There were barely any people in the office and I was just fully alone. So I just worked, ate whatever, and just relaxed. I had llaollao and it was pretty good. I took a few photos in the office and I even saw a rainbow, which was pretty interesting. In the evening, I played Peak with someone and Luan, and I had fun. Today was really nice and chill.

Song of the day: Somebody's Watching Me by Rockwell

Journal entry for Monday, June 30th, 2025

Mon, 30 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Monday was kind of weird. Elements of the past came back in my life. Today was supposed to be just a normal day but it didn't turn out like that. Work went by and ended as usual. But I had problems and an argument with someone because she was spiraling and felt burdened by cat problems, and she told me that it was just like before. Thankfully, I got through to her and I told her my side as well which was that I can't take Kit in because I'm just sharing the house and there are some bad instances where even Milktea got mistreated, so taking in another cat is just not possible. She calmed down after that and I reassured her that I'd try to help her out with her cat stuff as much as I can, and told her my plan of giving her 40K for Kit's surgery. She eventually calmed down and things were okay again between us, thankfully. Also, Val came back and found me on IG. We talked again and she said we should call again sometime. I told her that I'm really busy right now and I was, swamped with thinking of someone's cat problems but also dealing with her. For what it's worth, we played Peak with Luan again and it was fun. Someone and I were also okay by the end of the day, we had a video call and I got to see her face in a while, so that was nice. So having that and Val come back saved this day from turning into a bad day. I also had an opportunity to go to Europe (The Netherlands, I think) if this online thing with me goes well, so here's to hoping for that.

Song of the day: Love Me Like You by Little Mix

Journal entry for Sunday, June 29th, 2025

Sun, 29 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Sunday was pretty chill with me just staying at home. I started off the day by watching Squid Game Season 3 and finishing it. I also ate a bag of hot Cheezy while watching it, and it was pretty good watch for what it was. I wasn't "wowed" like in Squid Game Season 1, though, and I downright **hated** all of the remaining characters except Gi-hun and the baby in the end. I finished watching and eventually went to bed. The rest of the day had me playing fun games with someone, at first we were playing Cuphead together, and then she invited Luan for us to play Phasmophobia together. In the evening, we tried out this new game called Peak and it was really fun. We climbed over the first stage but failed climbing the subsequent ones. It was super fun and we had a lot of laughs while we were playing. At the end, someone and I stayed on call while I just played analog horror and scary videos for us to watch. I saw the opportunity to play old PS2 games like in 2024 and I was able to play some Tokyo Extreme Racer, but I couldn't easily play SSX Tricky like I used to. It was kind of disappointing because my graphics card is total garbage now compared to my GTX 1080 Ti, but whatever. I still enjoyed the experience of playing games with someone and then us having to stream and watch analog horror together and they even fell asleep in the call just like before.

Song of the day: Love Me Like You by Little Mix

Lyrics that resonated with me:
So, baby, baby, come and save me
Don't need those other numbers when I got my number one

Last night, I laid in bed so blue
'Cause I realized the truth, they can't love me like you
I tried to find somebody new
Baby, they ain't got a clue, can't love me like you (Ah)

Back at My Favorite Place!

Sat, 28 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Starbucks 32nd Street

My Saturday was totally free and I didn't plan on meeting with any of my friends this weekend, so I decided that today would be the day I "broke the MacBook in" and enjoyed using it at a Starbucks. While I still didn't like the black color of the Mac that much, I just decided that it's fine. I booked a ride to Starbucks and thankfully the weather was kind of good when I commuted there. I got there and I got coffee as my drink, which was kind of weird because I'm really not into coffee that much these days. But since it's my usual drink when hanging out at Starbucks, I just decided to go for it. I got my drink and went upstairs to find a seat and I thankfully found a seat, a sofa seat with a table. It was the perfect spot and I took some photos of me working on my website with my new MacBook. I took some photos of it and I liked the black color, which made me think that getting the black one wasn't that bad at all. There are some smudges here and there, smudges that definitely wouldn't show up if I got the silver one, but it is what it is. I took a photo of my MacBook because it still looks beautiful. I coded on it for a while, mostly figuring out some Material 3 Expressive shapes and adding them to my site, and then working on that new DynamicScheme color theming system. Both features took a while to figure out and I passed the whole afternoon and early evening on both. Throughout my stay, I was a bit apprehensive about leaving my MacBook alone. Sure, it's not a flashy device and it honestly looks like any black Windows laptop, but I didn't want this stolen, so I brought it with me when going to get water or going to the bathroom. I just left my Cinnamoroll umbrella on the desk I occupied so that no one takes my seat. I also played some of my old favorite sogns from Claire Rosinkranz while coding. After all that coding, I was able to make some progress on my future site redesign, which was nice. Also, nothing really bad happened, thankfully. I eventually left and found out that it was a bit stormy, with some light rain. I left to go grab dinner somewhere and I didn't really plan on anything, so I walked around for a bit. I stopped by The Loop on Bonifacio High Street because I wanted to buy a USB dongle for my MacBook, and I was kind of disappointed to get one that cost 2,600 Pesos and didn't even have an ethernet plug, which sucks. I walked around a bit more, and even thought of eating at Mendokoro, but that's near Mitsukoshi mall, which isn't feasible to walk to in the light rain, so I settled for Ramen Nagi and ate there for a bit. The food was nice, although I really don't remember tasting much of it, for some reason. Regardless, I finish my food enough and booked a ride home. It rained a bit, but thankfully the MacBook wasn't affected. I went home safe and just chilled for the rest of the evening. I used this time to watch the entirety of Squid Game Season 3 and it was a pretty fun and thrilling watch.

Song of the day: Hotel by Claire Rosinkranz

Journal entry for Friday, June 27th, 2025

Fri, 27 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Glorietta 5

Today was your usual, chill day at the office and nothing much happened aside from just a usual day at work. After work ended, I had to meet Mariah and her boss because she would like to present something to me and I agreed a few days ago. We met at Starbucks in Glorietta 5 and her boss thought I was buying a condo unit, or at least interested in one (I was not), so she presented a few properties to me even though I wasn't that interested. I had good questions, though, and Mariah also thought that I was legit looking for a property, and even though she herself knew that I wasn't. It was fun regardless and Mariah and I both went home at the same time. She seemed really tired and we were just joking around, talking, and making jokes as we were going home. She was going to tag along with me and I got a Grab ride for us since it was already raining and she didn't want her dad to pick her up. We got in the Grab ride and I could tell that she was really tired as she was going to only rest for a while before waking up for a work thing tomorrow. She eventually got dropped off at her place and I had the rest of the Grab ride all to myself, which was pretty fun and chill.

Song of the day: It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year by Andy Williams

Journal entry for Thursday, June 26th, 2025

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today started with me getting ready earlier than usual because I had to leave to my other workplace so I can meet my teammates again. I was to report to the other workplace down south so I had to prepare early, even though it averaged out to the usual time I'd prepare and leave the house. Thankfully, I was able to book a ride there and I was on my way. On my way there, I passed by SLEX because that's where I'd usually pass through. The trip was typical but, at one point, I saw a vehicle burning in the northbound track of SLEX. It was a bit horrific to see how much smoke was coming out of the vehicle and I was only happy that it wasn't an oil tanker or that it didn't blow up and cause a major issue. When I got to the office, I was relatively-okay and not that shaken from seeing what happened earlier. I got off on the wrong floor because I couldn't remember what floor we were on, and so I chose the 7th for good luck. Apparently, I was on the wrong floor and the right one was the one above. Regardless, I got to meet my coworkers and we got to talking about the agenda for today and what our tasks were for the day. And then we had a small meet and greet, as well as catching up, with out local supervisor and we just talked about a few processes, some changes, and so on. They were nice and friendly, but it was just super interesting that they started working for this company in 2013, and I can vividly remember that I was just in high school at the time. Time acts so weird but they also joked about it because I kind of made them and my teammates feel old. But eventually, we finish talking and our meet and greet ends there. We return to our work for a bit before having lunch. We decided to go out for lunch and they had some plans to eat somewhere near. Since it was just a nearby walk, we went to Conti's and had lunch there. We talked while on the way and I had to get my Cinnamoroll umbrella, which they found cute and I told them of the other Sanrio characters that they might recognize like Keroppi, Hello Kitty, and others. We eventually get to Conti's and I order a few things, mainly beef salpicao, *palabok*, match strawberry, and even iced gulaman because my teammate also ordered that. We ate and mostly discussed a few things like their lives, how it is at the company, and so on. I mostly just asked my coworker how it's like raising a kid in the 2020s because inflation is such a pain. We keep talking until it was our turn to pay the bill and I was shocked that the amount of food I bought totaled to 1,000 Pesos (1,070 to be exact). But whatever, I ate good food and it was nice, although the *palabok* isn't as good as the one in Jollibee and Mang Inasal. I paid for the bill and collected their payments and then we went back to the office. For the rest of the aftrnoon, I was working on a script and debugging it. It was kind of hard to work out the complexity because I was dealing with recursion and part of me kept thinking of just getting home and using my MacBook. Time passed by quick and I had to go home early anyway because I had a meeting in the evening. Before that, I got to talk to other coworkers nearby as my teammate introduced me to them. After a bit, I asked my teammate where the Starbucks was and I told them that I'd grab a quick bite/*merienda* for a bit and they also decided on getting food as well. I mostly talked about how my teammate was able to afford their house and they said that their husband bought it in the late 2000s, which kind of made sense since everything was still super cheap and plentiful back then, and then I told them that it's kind of hard now. But I mostly asked how their house renovation went. I saw some cute cats nearby, too! And I took a lot of pictures of them! We eventually arrived at Starbucks and I just ordered a fruit drink because I wanted to just chill for the evening, not stay up. We then went to Subway where I bought this big footlong sandwich that I filled to the brim with jalapeños. We went back to the office and I ate a bit of it while refactoring and running my script. Eventually, it was time to head home and I initially planned to go to Mendokoro because someone recommended it. They also asked me if I'm down to place Phasmophobia later and I was down for that, but prioritized that and moved Mendokoro for tomorrow. Thankfully, I got a ride home quickly and traffic back home wasn't that bad, but it did take a while. After getting home, I checked on the medicine that my sister has bought and then I opened my Mac to use it for a bit. I played Phasmophobia with someone and we had a few good games. By the end of our playthrough, we got a perfect investigation again and that was good enough to end this night's playthrough. After that, I just talked to Max and Meryll about hanging out next month, and they were both free so thankfully we had plans for next month set. Nothing much happened with my evening after that. I just attended the meeting and I did fairly well presending for a bit, and following up on action items. After that, I just continued using my Mac. I wanted to see if I could return it because the black wasn't a really good look, but I couldn't find a way so I just decided to stick with it. I just calculated my finances for the rest of the evening.

Song of the day: Despacito by Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee

Hi, Mariah?

Wed, 25 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Filling Station, Poblacion

I originally had nothing planned for today, but it became really busy by the end. My morning started out like it usually would, though. I woke up a bit early, but also very tired because I slept late this morning. Someone left messages for me on our Discord server so I just replied to them and also talked to them a bit in the morning. For the rest of the day, I was mostly busy with work. I remember trying to make this piece of code work and I spent most of the afternoon on it, and I eventually figured it out by the end and put a flag on it to finish it by tomorrow. After all my work was done, I played Phasmophobia again with someone and Luan. It was really fun! We tried our best to get a "perfect investigation" and we completed a few rounds, mostly with me dying. But, by our last playthrough, we actually got a perfect investigation! It was a long round of Phasmophobia, we even took a small break to eat food, but we all got back in the game and actually got a perfect investigation! And I didn't have to die in the process! We were so happy after finishing the game and we all left to do other things, with me originally planning to sleep early. But out of the blue earlier, Mariah replies to my IG Story asking me what I do now and we got to talk again. It's been years since we met up and she invited me to meet up with her and have a chat. While I was skeptical at first, I figured it wasn't any harm to meet an old friend from high school. She eventually did tell me that she wanted me to meet with her boss on Friday so they can discuss some sales plan or thing to me, but I was okay doing that on Friday. For today, I figured Mariah and I would just meet up, talk, and catch up with each other's lives. I booked a ride to her workplace in Poblacion and it was interesting seeing her again. She looks so mature from when I last met her back when we were teens, but I guess that's just life. It's nice because she seemed so bubbly and peppy, and she even hugged me when I greeted her, which kind of shocked me since I'm not touchy with people often. But I appreciated Mariah being friendly and we walked around, just looking for a place to eat. I suggested Filling Station because we both didn't plan on anything and she went with it. Mariah and I just walked and caught up on our way there. She mostly just told me about how her life and family life have been recently, the challenges she's faced, and I'm seriously surprised to know that she hasn't been to Filling Station yet. I was more shocked to hear that she's never done partying or clubbing here in Poblacion. I tell her that she's really sheltered and she actually agrees. We eventually make our way to Filling Station and we're given a table. Somehow, I told Mariah that I couldn't hear properly and I asked her if it was fine sitting next to her, which she agreed and I'm glad I asked because my hearing is starting to get really bad. Plus, the music in the place was loud so I wouldn't hear her anyway. It also helped because I don't feel comfortable sitting face to face and talking to people. We got our food and Mariah chose the angus burger I recommended, and I got steak for myself. I told her that I'd be treating her and she says she'll make up by treating me on Friday, which was nice of her. We also both got iced teas and I remarked that she should do a tierlist and she says that this one was the best for her, with the next being the iced tea from Bonchon, which I found funny. Eventually, our food was served and we ate while talking. Some of the people in the restaurant also had birthdays. The speakers played a loud "Happy Birthday" jingle that sounded obnoxious at first, but downright horrible because that song played 5 times or so for 5 birthday celebrants. It was so weird that so many people had today, June 25, as their birthday and I joked that the likelihood of that was super low, and then Mariah laughed. But she was irritated by the jingle as well and she didn't like it at all. I catch up Mariah on some parts of my life that I've unpacked recently, like my situationship, how I gave so much to someone, and so on. I even shared secrets to Mariah that I've barely shared to anyone. Thankfully, she was receptive and super friendly when I was kind of telling her the gray-area stuff I've been doing. Mariah also tells me the stuff she's been doing the past few years and we talked about a few things from her life, mainly her family life, career, studies, and her history leading up to this point. We also talked about our mutual friends and the people that we know. Mariah then tells me that she's happily single which kind of shocked me because I thought she'd have a boyfriend or seeing someone, and then I tell her that I'm single as well and avoiding meeting new people because of how tragic my past "relationships"/romantic encounters have been. Mariah even joked that she mostly shared about her life and apologized for talking a lot, but I was fine listening since I often do that for my other friends who just want a friend to listen and talk to. It was nice talking to Mariah again after so long. We both found it funny because it's been 8 years since we last met up, but I'm glad we were able to pick up where we left off and that we're still good friends. We eventually had some food for take-out and we walked around because we felt a bit bloated. I recommended the Starbucks nearby and she was surprised that there was one nearby. We went there and I order a drink for myself, while Mariah just tries to rest because she's really tired. We talk for a bit more until we eventually decide to head home and Mariah books a ride to her place. I wait for her ride to arrive and she gives me one last hug before saying goodbye, which I found super cute and kind of her to do. I went back to the Starbucks and booked a ride home eventually. The trip home was nice, I mostly listened to good music and I just took in our interaction for the evening. When I got home, I got a message from Mariah and I joked to her that I'm still alive. We talk for a bit and I joke to her that I plan on selling my new MacBook because I don't like the color. I put it as an IG Note which she replies to, and I recommend that she just paint my acrylic laptop case for it since she's an artist as well, and I tell her that I'll give it to her come Friday. She says she's down for it and I promise to repay her by treating her out, but then she recommends that we could hang out without having money involved, which was super nice of her. Elaine also replies to my note and I joke about not liking the color of my MacBook to her. Eventually, I had to go to sleep and I wrote my journal entry before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Love Myself by Hailee Steinfeld

Lyrics that resonated with me:
(I love me) (hey)

Ah, la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la ah (nobody else) (hey)
Ah, la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la ah (nobody else) (hey)
Ah, la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la ah (nobody else) (hey)

Anytime that I like

Journal entry for Tuesday, June 24th, 2025

Tue, 24 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was my first actual day with my new MacBook Pro! And damn, I'm seriously starting to regret that I wasn't able to get a silver option. I used the laptop in my room all day and I also looked back at some photos of the old Dice MacBook Pro, the silver one, and in those pictures, the silver really looked nice. I really, really regret not getting the silver one and I just told myself that I'll get a silver one once a new OLED model is announced. For the rest of the day, it was your usual workday. I was kind of surprised how the majority of my day was just work. I did eat a healthy (but late) lunch for my oral and gum health, so here's to hoping my gums recover soon. I also bought groceries, paid the electricity bill, and hung out the clothes to properly dry when it wasn't raining. I was more glad that I took the clothes to dry out because those were my work clothes and putting them out for a few hours to dry really helped with that "indoor wet laundry smell." I also talked to someone a fair amount today. In the morning, I helped them with this Google AppsScript thing where they need to get data from Google Calendar to Google Sheets. And then I excused myself from talking to them once my shift started. We talked again after my shift ended and I invited them to play some games with me. We started out with Phasmophobia because there was apparently a new update for it. I played with Luan once again and I realized that we 3 haven't played together **in more than half a year**. It was crazy and I missed playing multiplayer games with people. We played Phasmo and I mostly died while someone was chilling in the van and Luan was doing his best to help. We ended on a win and someone and I played Left 4 Dead for a bit. I had gifted them that game since they, apparently, didn't have it in their library yet and we played through the first few stages of No Mercy. Overall, today was really fun even though the only regret I had was getting a black MacBook.

Song of the day: The Tide Is High - Radio Mix by Atomic Kitten

Lyrics that resonated with me:
The tide is high, but I'm holding on
I'm gonna be your number one (Ah, ah)
The tide is high, but I'm holding on (I'm gonna be, yeah)
I'm gonna be your number one (Ooh)

Back to Mac!

Mon, 23 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

It was already Monday for me too soon, but I had a pretty chill and lax day at work. Nothing much happened and I mostly caught up on the things I needed to do, as well as a few emails. Work was nothing noteworthy and my time just passed. I found some spare time in the day to go out to Glorietta and I decided to buy a new MacBook today! I was initially waiting for the new MacBook M5 models, but since the M6 models were going to have an OLED screen and that the new MacBooks won't get here until late November, I decided to bite the bullet and buy a new MacBook now, and then upgrade to an OLED MacBook somewhere down the line. Despite the heavy rain, I was able to book a ride to Glorietta and I initially went to Greenbelt to the Power Mac Center there. I thought it was a big store, so they definitely would have the exact MacBook model I wanted. When I got to Power Mac Center, they told me that they didn't have the 16-inch MacBook model that I wanted. I asked for the 14-inch one, and they didn't have it either. In fact, they didn't have any of the M4 Macs and that they haven't had stock for a month now, which I found extremely weird considering how they're this high-end shop for Apple products. It just made me regret my trip back to Glorietta because I walked all this way for nothing. I then visited Switch Glorietta and they didn't have any M4 MacBooks either, just M3 ones, which I kind of cringed at. They told me to try Digital Walker next door and, while I had my doubts since their store seemed small and packed with other tech products, I was surprised that they had the model I was looking for. I wanted an M4 MacBook Pro and, sure enough, they had it in stock. They didn't have the 16-inch model, though, just the 14-inch ones. What's worse is that the only one they had in silver was a 16GB RAM one, even though my Dice work MacBook had 24GB of RAM before. The only 24GB model they had came in black. Yeesh. I wanted to buy a MacBook because I want to be a social climber and do my work at a Starbucks again, and having a black one where the Apple logo is barely visible isn't going to cut it. I had to make a decision on whether or not I'd sacrifice being vain for worse performance, or if I'll just go with the better option. In the end, I just went with a black MacBook Pro with an M4 Pro chip. I just shook my head but whatever, I had to be happy with my option because this is the only one that was in stock. I set it up and I started to feel anxious because some goon might steal it from me, which didn't sit well with me because I read Reddit posts of people having their phones stolen at Greenbelt nearby. I just tried to set it up and the salesman recommended that I buy a screen protector for it. I went to the other store after buying my MacBook to have a screen protector installed and the salesperson told me that they also sold acrylic covers. I read online that both were bad for Macs, but I was already here so I couldn't refuse. I just chose to get the acrylic cover and went out of the store after buying it. I set up my Mac and then booked a Grab ride home, and I tried to download a few things while on the ride home. When I got home, I still felt a bit upset that the silver color option I didn't have wasn't available. I read that getting the black one was prone to coating and scratching issues long term and that kind of made me regret my purchase. Still, this is a big accomplishment for myself. This is the first MacBook I own. Unlike the Dice work MacBook, I don't have to return this and this was actually my device. After setting it up and my sister ordering food, someone invited me to play Phasmophobia with them and we played 1 round before having me stream a video while they watch before going to sleep, just like how we were back in 2024. We just watched some analog horror and Left 4 Dead lore. Someone eventually disconnected from the call and I did other things. I posted an IG Story about getting my MacBook and I talked to a few friends, especially LK. I thought she was going to get married so I kind of congratulated her, and she found it odd because she wasn't going to get married. It was so funny because her friends posted this IG Story of her wearing a bridal veil and I thought that it was a sign that she would be married soon, and I can't believe it was just a prank. I found it so funny and I just asked LK to send me the a link to her future wedding registry so I could buy them a coffee maker. For the rest of the evening, I mostly just set up my MacBook and published my past journal entries.

Song of the day: Better When I'm Dancin' by Meghan Trainor

Got to meet Belle!

Sun, 22 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal Mall

I can't believe it! Today was finally the day I would meet up with Belle! I've known her for 4 years and yet today was the day we would first meet up. I was tossing and turning last night in my bed and even had this horrible dream about the weather being bad because the rain was just pelting my bedroom window. But when I woke up, the weather seemed okay and it was even sunny a bit. Belle messaged me and told me that she was on the way and that she was close by, which made me panic because she's the one further away, and I didn't want to be too late. I immediately wore my usual outfit and got ready to book for a ride to Venice Grand Canal Mall. I played that new Sabrina Carpenter song while on the way there because I heard it a lot last night on IG Reels and it made the ride very funny and interesting. I eventually got to Venice Grand Canal Mall and Belle tells me that she's just waiting outside of Jollibee and I try to find her just sitting outside. And eventually I do just find her sitting outside and I immediately felt myself tense up. It was kind of weird because I could feel myself having a hard time finding the right words and talking, which seemed weird because I'm extroverted and usually great with people. I'm not sure why I tensed up so much at meeting Belle. But thankfully, I was able to fight through it and give her the tote bag I bought from Boracay, the usual Boracay sand in a jar, and her keychain. We walk for a bit and then I ask her if she was hungry yet, and she says no so I decide to have us go on that gondola ride while it was still sunny out. We went to the ticket booth and I asked how much was one gondola ride for 2, which the guy pointed out that the real ticket booth was on the other side of the escalator. I didn't understand what he meant by that, but we make our way to the other side of the escalator and that's where the gondola ride ticket booth was! The cashier told me that they only accept cash so I had to withdraw at a nearby BPI while Belle accompanies me. We talk about a few things like horror and the Annabelle doll while making our way there. I was surprised to hear that Belle was into horror, too, and not the gory kind. I can honestly feel myself tense up like a rock and not say anything. I was watching myself and I was too self-conscious towards Belle that I probably scared myself stiff. I had to withdraw some money and I was awkward as fuck, but we eventually made our way back and I paid for the tickets. I talked to Belle about her new phone and I found it funny that she was on the verge of complaining to the DTI because her phone replacement still wasn't ready. We then went to the place where the gondolas and other boats were parked and we waited our turn. We talked mostly about Belle's travels abroad and I was shocked to find out that she's been to so many places abroad already. I asked her what her trip to Japan was like, why she wants to ride a bike, and her recent Hong Kong trip as well. It was nice to hear stories about her travels and I'm really impressed that she's been to so many places already. Eventually, it was our turn to ride the Gondola and I was so conscious of taking pictures with her. I honestly think I look too fat and I just didn't feel comfortable in my skin for whatever reason. I still took some pics with her regardless and took some photos of her while on the Gondola ride. We took a photo together, too, and even Belle offered to take my photos, which was nice. We essentially circled the entire Venice Grand Canal and then went back to claim our photos. We got 2 sets of the same photos so we'd split them. By this point, we were kind of hungry and I was looking at which restaurant would be a good place for us to eat. Since Belle let me decide for us, I chose Italianni's. We had lunch and I chose the spaghetti and meatballs, as well as a calamari platter for us to share. I also ordered a Pinky Swear which was an alcoholic drink, a cocktail. It kind of shocked me internally because I hadn't drank alcohol in months, not even in Boracay, but I figured I was too tense and that maybe alcohol would help me tense up less. I realized that it might give Belle a bad image of me, like I'm some alcoholic drinker, but I know I'm not so I didn't care for my image being that. I recommended the pastas to Belle and then the iced tea, which she also ordered. She got the halibut with angel hair pasta and we just talked while waiting for the order. By this point, it was starting to get gloomy and I point out that it was already raining. I asked her about her glasses and we talked about a few things, like her work schedule, work in general, and even if she smoked, haha. I was shocked because we were both non-smokers and I tell her that almost everyone I know has some strong relationship with smoking or nicotine except me, but it was funny to hear that Belle doesn't smoke at all. Eventually, our food and iced teas get served and Belle talks to me about how she ranks iced teas that she's tried, which I find cute and interesting. I asked her what her top iced tea was and she says that it's from Shakey's, and that her worst was the one from KFC, which I totally agree with because it's always so bitter, even with the sweetener mixed in. But then we eventually ate and kept talking about other things. We eventually finished our meals and had the calamari ordered for take-out. I paid for our bill and we went to the movies afterward. When we got there, it was still early so we waited outside the entrance and sat on a bench for a bit. Belle tells me a story about going to Starmall Alabang's movie theater and how it had a lot of people when they entered, but had quite a few people when they left the movie theater. I ask her if she's familiar with the rumor that it was built upon a cemetery and then I tell her about the other haunted places in Metro Manila that I want to visit, particularly the Manila Film Center. It was eventually our time to go inside the theater so we get our complementary popcorn and water as we went in. We were the first ones inside the theater so it was a little creepy. We kind of scared each other and talked about how eerie and creepy it was, and then I joked to her that I'd go to the bathroom and leave her alone for a bit. But we eventually waited for the other people to arrive and that's when I went to the bathroom. I was shocked because the bathroom had speakers and a loud sound just came out of nowhere and then the various movie trailers played. I rejoined Belle and I watched the other trailers, some of which were scary enough for me to check them out in the future. The movie eventually started and I picked 28 Years Later (2025) for us since Belle was undecisive, haha. The movie started and it was pretty brutal than what I had expected, and then I remembered how Belle didn't like gory movies that much, which just made me regret my decision of choosing this movie. I kind of wish I played it safe and chose the live-action How to Train Your Dragon (2025) instead. I didn't want to choose Elio (2025), though. The movie was okay to me, but it was honestly too brutal for my taste. I also had time having trouble understanding the people speaking because they spoke with a heavy Scottish accent. I'm not sure how Belle found it, but we talked through some parts of the movie, so that was nice. After the movie, we walked around Venice Grand Canal Mall for a bit. We checked out the Timezone nearby for this drum game that Belle likes, but it wasn't there so we kept walking. We stopped by Dairy Queen and I ordered a large New York cheesecake for me, and a regular-sized mango serving for Belle. We continued to walk around and talk, and I kind of avoided the mascots because they were too creepy for me. I told this to Belle and she found it a bit funny. Belle and I sit outside at the pigeon-feeding place and I tell Belle how there are pigeons in the Philippines, and that my village even has a squirrel in it. We talked and ate our ice cream before coming back inside the mall when it was starting to rain. We walked a bit more, I bought some stuff at Sanrio and I asked her if she was into Harry Potter. She wasn't, but she and I shared the same houses: Hufflepuff! It kind of caught me off guard since most people I know are Slytherin and Belle was the first one I know who was the same house as me. I buy some Slytherin socks for Ailysh because I know how much she loves her Slytherin socks and I bought a Cinnamoroll-themed hand cream for myself. We walked around for a bit more, sat down, and talked a bit more about each other's lives. I asked Belle how her commute would be like and I kind of said sorry because I didn't have a car to drive her home with and make her commute easier. She tells me that she'll take the bus and get a Grab ride there since it was already raining. We keep talking until it was around 7:19 p.m. or so and then she books a Grab to the bus. I show her where to wait and then escort her to the Grab car and say goodbye to her. Once Belle got in the car, I went back to the mall to just analyze and take it all in. It was so weird how I was so tense around Belle. I even found myself stuttering and not having the right words to say. I kept telling myself of my usual assurances, but nothing worked and I just seemed too tense, and I'm not sure why. Still, I booked a ride home and just chilled for the night. I saw that Belle posted a picture of us and her other pics of the day in her IG Story and I was able to reshare that to mine. I didn't look too bad in the photo that Belle chose, and I even looked "okay" so I don't know what the hell I was worrying about the whole time. I had fun spending the day with Belle, all in all.

Song of the day: Manchild by Sabrina Carpenter

Lyrics that resonated with me:
It's all just so familiar, baby, what do you call it?

Stupid
Or is it slow?
Maybe it's useless?
But there's a cuter word for it, I know

Man-child
Why you always come a-running to me?
Fuck my life
Won't you let an innocent woman be?

Journal entry for Saturday, June 21st, 2025

Sat, 21 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

My Saturday was pretty boring, I was mostly catching up on mood calendar entries and getting ready to post them. I did get my commissioned artwork in the evening and that felt like an ending of some sort. I just had this feeling to sing Adele's "Easy On Me" for the rest of the night, I guess it's because I just feel guilty that I fucked up recently. But whatever, the past is past. I just looked forward to what I had planned tomorrow which is to just meet a friend. I was still worried because the rain is really strong. I just hoped that the weather tomorrow would be favorable enough for us to hang out and enjoy our day out.

Song of the day: Easy On Me by Adele

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Go easy on me, baby
I was still a child
Didn't get the chance to
Feel the world around me
I had no time to choose
What I chose to do
So go easy on me

Journal entry for Friday, June 20th, 2025

Fri, 20 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was just your usual good day. I woke up and got ready for work, I actually got to work earlier on time, so that was nice. My workload today was fairly-easy and I spent the morning just catching up on emails and things to do for the day, as well as logging the stuff I did for the week. I skipped breakfast at home so I had breakfast at the Starbucks nearby and talked to someone while eating. They eventually had to leave for the day and for the weekend and I thought nothing about them being gone. It's funny because I kind of feel more secure with being by myself now and that I don't really need anyone else to be happy. I finished my breakfast and went back up to do some more work. I had lunch out with my coworkers and they wanted to go somewhere far this time, which kind of put me to the test because I had a meeting at 1:30 p.m. We walked all the way to Greenbelt 3 and ate at Soban K-Town Grill. This is a looooonnngggg walk back and I could just feel the kind of sprint I'll have to do after this. We got seated and we were initially confused about the menu and I kept laughing at how absurd the menu options were and there were so many "ultra"s involved, but we didn't even know which meal offering had iced tea. It just seemed too funny in my head. My coworker also invited me out to buy some phones with them because they asked me which cheap phone to buy and I recommended an Infinix or a Techno phone. I then played Clash of Clans while we were waiting for the food to be served. Eventually, we got the food and it was really nice. I was just eating while being mindful of the time because I had to run back. And then the waitress serves another plate, which I believed was mine, and that I had actually been eating the bowl of my coworker! It was supposed to be for them but I ate it instead and they've been waiting for their dish in forever. I found it funny but my coworker was fine with it. I just bought and paid for the 2 dishes and I ordered my original plate to go because I had to run soon. I paid and then got the fuck out of there because I had 10 minutes to run back to the office. And running back was such a pain! My stomach immediately felt unwell but I had to keep running and I already knew I was sweating hard as hell. I took a while to get to the office and the elevator was kinda weird, but I eventually arrived, albeit late by 2 minutes, to my meeting. I just gave updates and I continued through my usual set of daily tasks. In the afternoon, I was all caught up in my tasks and I was essentially done for work. I accompanied my coworker in buying 2 phones for his wife's workers and we went to a phone store nearby to buy them. They got a Redmi 14C and it totally fit their budget, and I was just shocked that smartphones were that cheap now. We went to his car so he can put the phones in and then to Dairy Queen because I wanted another mint Blizzard again. We went back and I just finished up with my tasks at work. We were all preparing to leave by 6 p.m. and us 3 went out at the same time. Today kind of feels weird because my stomach and mood turned bad in the late afternoon. But also because my seat was going to reassigned. I'd be placed a bit far from them which made me think that I won't have lunch out with them anymore, and it just made me feel bad. While I want to be left alone these days because I've been a bit hurt by my new relationships, I actually do cherish my "coworkers" even though they're from a different team. Part of what was in my mind was that I enjoyed my time with them, eating out, having lunch, joking around, and playing board games with them. It was bittersweet to know that I might be separated from them come next week. When I got home, my body just felt so tired and in pain. I just couldn't do anything and rested for the entire evening. I wanted to update my mood calendar and even felt like writing a blog post, but I couldn't do either and just rested for the entire evening.

Song of the day: Billyeoon Goyangi (Do the Dance) by ILLIT

Playing Again??

Thu, 19 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I go to work today! And I started my morning bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I immediately got ready for work and booked a ride quickly. I played a good selection of songs and, while the driver was chatty, I didn't mind and enjoyed the conversation a bit. I played a few good tracks on my way to work, especially one from Andy Grammer. We took a good route on my way to work, passing through BGC, and I got to work really early, too. It was such a nice surprise. When I got to work, I got started on some of my usual tasks. Someone asked for their Dyson Airwrap today and I was wondering how I could get that for them when I didn't bring any of my credit cards with me. But I went in and checked and, to my surprise, one was actually in my wallet. It had enough credit on it for it to be used, too. Someone pointed that things always worked out for them, but, for me I was shocked since it's protocol for me to store my credit cards at home and not bring it with me. But regardless, I agreed, and my coworkers invited me to get some Zus coffee with them. I ordered my usual matcha blend and we went out to get our drinks. There were a lot of moths today! I took so many pictures of my phone and posted it on my IG Story. I also sent it to someone, but she didn't show much regard for it. We got our coffee and quickly went back to the office. Someone also confronted me today if I still had feelings for them and that they felt uneasy talking to me because I might still harbor feelings for them. I didn't really feel butterflies for them, nor for anyone anymore, so I just told them that I'm not interested in them. It's nice that they felt bad about how they treated me, though, so that was nice. I also sent them a screenshot that basically says that I'm not the one for them and someone else probably is. Besides, I know that the one for me won't treat me like shit and put me through so much pain. I told them that I deserve proper love, regardless of how weird I am, and I'm glad that they got the message. I know better now, anyway. I did some work for a bit and then we all had to go out to get lunch. We went to the food court and I took more photos of moths while on the way out. We had lunch at the usual Glorietta food court and I just got some squid. My order took a while, surprisingly, and I just passed the time talking to someone on Discord. After a while, I went back to my coworkers. We joked and ate, while they asked me why did I buy a new iPhone 15 recently. Another coworker also joked about Crab N' Bites and I teased them about visiting that place. Then we went back to the office and I talked to a coworker about some audio stuff and that I was shocked when they shared something about ILLIT. Work for the rest of the day was nice, I did a lot today and made good progress on my tasks. I went home at the usual time and arrived pretty quickly. When I got home, someone invited me to play games with them and we played Overcooked 2 again. It was so weird, too, since it's been months since we called, but we were back in a Discord call, playing games like no time had passed. It was nice and they were frustrated for a bit because some of the levels were hard, but it was fun to finally play games with them again. They slept after that and I just continued to rest for the entire evening before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Fresh Eyes by Andy Grammer

Lyrics that resonated with me:
So suddenly, I'm in love with a stranger
I can't believe that she's mine
Now all I see is you with fresh eyes, fresh eyes
So suddenly, I'm in love with a stranger
I can't believe that she's mine, yeah
And now all I see is you with fresh eyes, fresh eyes

Journal entry for Wednesday, June 18th, 2025

Wed, 18 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was just a pretty fun day at home. I finally listened to ILLIT's new song and **I LOVED IT**. I played it so much today. I also talked to someone throughout the whole day, so it was nice to finally have someone to talk to. I continued to work and I had a really productive day. I accomplished something big at work and, while I really wanted to treat myself, I didn't. But I got Pickup Coffee for my sister and I. I also ordered Mang Inasal for us for our dinner. I had fun today and I thought someone and I would play on Discord today, but they told me that they had to sleep so we had to postpone it to tomorrow. Regardless, I had fun today and did a lot at work, so that was nice.

Song of the day: Billyeoon Goyangi (Do the Dance) by ILLIT

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Dance, do a little
Do, ah, do a little

Dance, do a little dance, do ya, do ya, do you wanna dance?
대답은 하나뿐, say, yeah, yeah, yeah, yes
Dance, 손을 잡은 채, do it, do it, 너와 나의 date
마법에 걸리게, say "Yeah, yeah, yeah"

Am I dreaming? Or was my wish to God granted?

Tue, 17 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

My day started out still watching Severance and then sleeping afterward. When I woke up, I checked my Apple Watch for notifications and I got this message: > you still write like a child That message came from *someone*. I couldn't believe it. I've had **MANY** dreams like this before where they suddenly talk to me again and we'd be talking. So I replied back, saying "Am I dreaming?" because I wasn't sure if I was awake or not. I woke up in a very dreamlike state so I found it hard to believe that *someone* would be the first one to reach out after 7+ months, but I guess this was reality. I had a short conversation with them and we talked, caught up over the course of the day. Work continued and was nothing really noteworthy. I just had a lot of stuff on my plate for today, but I was able to power through it all today. I was kind of busy in the late afternoon, but I was able to time out without issues and with most of my board cleared. After work, I didn't really do much aside from talk to *someone* on iMessage. I thought they wanted to play a game so I invited them to Discord, but they said that they were going to sleep soon. I just watched Severance until I passed out at 11 p.m. or so, I felt really tired for some reason. It's so odd that God granted 2 of my wishes this June. I don't know why, but my 2 main wishes got granted. June is weirdly special.

Severed

Mon, 16 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was actually the first day where I worked from home and didn't turn on my PC. I started the day by still watching Korean stuff on my Apple TV and I tried to watch a few Korean CFs before eventually passing out. When I woke up, it was a Monday and a usual workday for me. My workload today was nothing unusual and I found a new Chappell Roan song to like, so that got me through the day. I also spent some of my lunch time just watching House M.D. on the TV, which was such a nice change of things. I also got myself Pickup Coffee and ordered 2 drinks, which seemed excessive as I had trouble finishing both. I also got myself Potato Corner fries, which was a nice snack to munch on throughout the afternoon. Come evening or so, I finally decided to watch Severance. I even had to get an Apple TV+ subscription, which I have to take into account when paying my monthly bills, but I got one and continued to watch the entire first season. I was really **hooked** and I love the finale. I continued watching up to the second season and then I stopped after watching the first episode just so I knew what happened after the ending. I also made a wish to God to just bring everything back. To bring the past back, but to keep some parts of my current life intact, like my job and parts of my "new" life. I really tried hard to ask if God could grant me that wish.

Song of the day: HOT TO GO! by Chappell Roan

Lyrics that resonated with me:
H-O-T-T-O-G-O
Snap and clap and touch your toes
Raise your hands, now body roll
Dance it out, you're hot to go
H-O-T-T-O-G-O
Snap and clap and touch your toes
Raise your hands, now body roll
H-O-T-T-O-G-O

H-O-T-T-O-G-O
You can take me hot to go
H-O-T-T-O-G-O
You can take me hot to go

An Apple TV?

Sun, 15 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: BGC High Street

Sunday was pretty boring for me and I didn't plan on going out today. I just spent the entire day just chilling and doing my best to catch up on my journal entries, especially logging my top songs for the past week. But for the rest of the day, I was just chilling. Suddenly, I felt the need to go out in the afternoon. I initially decided to "treat myself" again after completing my mood entries, but I just went out regardless. I kept watching videos of how to set up an Apple TV and thought if I should buy myself one. I was hesitant because they'll just release a new version this year, but whatever, I just wanted to buy one now so I booked a ride to SM Aura and the driver was kind of chatty, which put me off a bit. He went on about how we shouldn't have bike lanes and that kind of put me in a bad mood. But eventually, I reached SM Aura and I checked Power Mac Center if they have an Apple TV with ethernet available. They didn't, so I had to walk to The Loop in Bonifacio High Street. It took me a while to walk there and my Apple Watch even recorded my walk as a workout, but I eventually got there. The saleslady wasn't sure if they still had the ethernet version in stock, but the first Apple TV box she pulled from the display shelf was the ethernet version! It was the last one they had, too! I was so lucky! I immediately purchased the Apple TV and walked to One Bonifacio to buy an HDMI and an ethernet cable. I was able to get both for pretty cheap, which was nice, and I booked a ride home. Thankfully, I got home quick and I excitedly set up my new Apple TV. I immediately downloaded some apps and set it up with my iPhone. I figured out how to add an IP TV app to this and I watched some KBS Drama. I saw that Seohyun's drama was airing and I took pictures. I was so excited and enjoyed this new device and it just felt so nice. I was just watching Korean TV and Korean CF ads until I passed out.

Song of the day: Somebody To You by The Vamps

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Oh-oh-oh, now!

All I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah
Is somebody to you
All I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah
Is somebody to you
Everybody's trying to be a billionaire
But every time I look at you I just don't care
'Cause all I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah
Is somebody to you (Yeah, you! Hahaha)

Journal entry for Saturday, June 14th, 2025

Sat, 14 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Samgyupsalamat BGC

Today was just a boring Saturday. I planned to update my mood calendar for the past few days and I typed out a bit, but I suddenly just had this feeling of just wanting to go out. But first, I had breakfast with my sister and we ate McDonald's for breakfast and I tried that new cotton candy float they had. I rested for a bit more in the afternoon and then planned to go out. I initially planned to convert my old SIM card to a postpaid plan, but things didn't work out that way so I just had to cancel that and just hang out in BGC. So I just walked around deciding on where to eat. I walked around High Street for a while before ultimately deciding on Samgyupsalamat since I haven't eaten there in a while. So I went there and it looked new. It looked completely different from my last time going there. It was so crazy seeing their new inteior and it looked more Korean. Too bad they got rid of the TV that kept playing Korean music videos in the background. They still have the same selection of food and I just tried the usual beef ones I often ate. They also played some 2NE1 and Girls' Generation songs, which was nice. They specifically played "The Boys" which I recoded a video of and sent to my sister. Nothing much happened aside from me eating samgyupsal by myself, as usual, and I paid for my meal and left without worries. Since McDonald's was already downstairs, I went and tried the same cotton candy float I had earlier and drank it while playing Clash of Clans. I booked a ride home and just rested for the rest of the day.

Song of the day: Somebody To You by The Vamps

Back to Your Regularly-Scheduled Programming

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was just a usual, boring quiet day at work. But something about today just made me appreciate my usual routine. I booked a ride to work and I actually arrived a little earlier than I usually do. The traffic to work wasn't that bad. In fact, it was surprisingly low traffic for a Friday. I arrived early and got a lot of tasks done in the early part of my shift. I decided to get Zus Coffee as a pick-me-up and decided on getting lunch from Homer Easy Middle Eastern. It was nice, although they gave me chicken instead of beef because they were out of it. I ate lunch alone, surprisingly, since it's been quite a while eating out alone on an office workday. The rest of my shift was just boring and I was mostly by myself. My usual seatmates weren't here, except for 1 person but we didn't talk at all. I was mostly by my lonesome today. Not bothering anyone and nobody else bothering me. Today was really just a peaceful day and I appreciate days like this. In the afternoon, I went outside to grab *merienda* and decided on Subway since I kind of missed working in Makati and eating Subway. I ordered a footlong, which was kind of expensive, but I ultimately enjoyed it while I was scarfing it down in the office breakroom alone. By the end of the day, I booked a ride and it was relatively-easy getting one, despite it being on a Friday. I also played a new song from Taylor Bickett while I was on my way out of the office and it felt like I was at the closing scene of a movie or something. Something about it felt cinematic, for some reason. The weather helped a bit since it didn't rain much in Makati (if at all) and the traffic going home was also surprisingly low. I just enjoyed the ride home and then rested for the entire evening. The whole trip home, I was just thinking how I really am in a new chapter of my life. Away from all the anxieties of before and all those toxic relationships. I spent most of the day alone and in peace, which I like, to be honest.

Song of the day: QUARTER LIFE CRISIS by Taylor Bickett

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'm terrified of rejection
But I get high off attention
I drink my coffee light
'Cause I'm not fuckin' pretentious
Say that I read for fun
But haven't read in months
Say that I'm settlin' down
But I blacked out at brunch

iPhone 15 for Me, Samsung for Sis

Thu, 12 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Venice Grand Canal

It's the Philippines' Independence Day today and I initially didn't plan on anything for today. But in the morning, I had received a promo for iPhones and I've been thinking of having a backup iPhone for a while now. I decided to just bite the bullet and buy myself an iPhone 15 base model as a sort of backup. I booked a ride to Venice Grand Canal and I eventually got there quick, despite it drizzling a bit on my ride there. When I got to Venice Grand Canal, I immediately found Beyond the Box nearby and I tried to buy an iPhone 15 from them. But it turns out that I could only be eligible for an iPhone 14 base model and I kind of reeled a little bit because I don't like the Lightning port. I really didn't want a new device that wasn't USB C so I sat there in the store thinking for a while on what I'm going to do. Ultimately, I decided that I wouldn't leave without a new iPhone 15 so I just decided to buy one regardless and walked out with a new phone. One regret I have about it is the 60hz display, which kind of feels sluggish. It felt a bit like it was lagging, and I'm completely okay with 60hz displays. But this one felt like it hurt to look at. It was so different compared to my iPhone 16 Pro Max, and it didn't have the action button nor the camera button that I was already used to on my 16. I kind of had buyer's remorse, but I decided to just fuck it, I have a proper backup phone now. I drank at the Starbucks nearby and got coffee even though I'm not supposed to, and then booked a ride home. While I was on the ride home, I thought about it for a while and I just got myself a new phone, while my sister has been rocking her shitty Samsung phones for quite a while now. I felt guilty so I asked my sister to get dressed as I plan to buy a new phone for her today as well. When I got home, she was all dressed up and ready to go, and we booked a ride to SM Aura. We got to the Samsung store on the 3rd floor, only to find out that it was being closed for renovation. We then decided to go to Market! Market! nearby since it's the nearest official Samsung store. When we got to the ground floor, we noticed a pop-up official Samsung store that's selling phones. It was perfect! We didn't want to walk to Market! Market! anyway and my sister ultimately decided on getting an S25 Plus. She decided the color, Icy Blue, and I paid for her phone. I somehow didn't take a picture of her holding her new phone and I only realized my mistake as we were on the way to purchase a new case for her phone. When we got a transparent case for her on the 4th or 5th floor, that's when I took a photo of her and sent it to Mom. We immediately booked a ride home since I know that my sister would want to set up her new phone and she spent the rest of the day setting up her new S25 Plus. I also used the time to set up my new iPhone 15, changing the settings, installing apps and it only hit me at the end of the day how I was able to buy 2 new phones in a single day.

Song of the day: We Belong Together by Mariah Carey

Journal entry for Wednesday, June 11th, 2025

Wed, 11 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today started with me coming home from my trip outside and it was really, really fun. I enjoyed it and I was just happy and chilling for the rest of the trip home and then going to sleep. When I woke up, I got ready for work and booked a ride there. Work was the usual and I just spent most of the day just catching up on the piles of emails and things I have to catch up on. Thankfully, tomorrow's a holiday so I just had to get through today before getting an ample day of rest. It's funny that there were a lot of people in the row today, the seats were practically filled with people. Some of my coworkers didn't have any other place to sit at and I believe I took the seat of a coworker, but he didn't take me out of my seat and he just looked confused before moving someplace else. For the rest of the day, I was productive and I had a fun time with my coworkers. A coworker sold me his Ugreen power brick which had this robotic face that was kinda cute. But after that, I mostly just focused on work before booking a ride home. Overall, today was pretty ordinary but my trip from yesterday really made me just feel happy, it's as if life was worth living again.

Song of the day: Save Your Tears (Remix) by The Weeknd

Back from Boracay!

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: NAIA Terminal 3

Today started with me and Nathan eating our burgers. He was watching some protests in the US and he easily called the protest stupid, which I fought back against because I didn't think it was stupid. He was more conservative with his views and I was liberal on mine so we had different opinions on various matters. We debated a few world topics but we eventually had to conclude it after Nathan stopped eating and I felt too full to eat anymore. I waited for a bit and browsed on my phone before going to sleep. Come morning, we had one more lunch before our trip back to NAIA and eventually Manila. I enjoyed the breakfast one last time and then we went back to the hotel room to pack up and then check out of the hotel. We eventually bid farewell to the hotel and made our way out of the island and to Caticlan Airport. The trip was alright, it was nothing noteworthy. We did arrive early enough to have been offered an earlier return flight to NAIA so we chose that instead. We got our tickets reprinted and we went to the airplane separately, mostly because we had different seats and my boarding group was sooner than they were. My boarding group was first and we rode a bus all the way to the planes. I got on my seat and I was kind of disappointed that I didn't get a window seat, but whatever. My seat was sat in a row with the emergency exit on it so we were given a few reminders and that didn't help with my anxiety. Eventually, the plane took off and it was still scary, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. I slept on the trip back to NAIA and woke up as we were close to landing. I eventually got to NAIA and reunited with Nathan in the men's bathroom near the baggage claim area. We got our stuff and we all went out but had to part separate ways. I had other plans for the day so I had to make my way home and I thankfully booked a Joyride home easily. When I got home, my sister was at work so I just had to clean up, wash, and organize my stuff. My trip from Boracay was finally over and I missed my cat Milktea! I enjoyed my time home for a bit before going out to do other fun things for the rest of the day.

Song of the day: Lost The Breakup by Maisie Peters

Journal entry for Monday, June 9th, 2025

Mon, 09 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Boracay

I hadn't slept from last night and just looked online for places to visit in Boracay and I stumbled upon Club Galaxy in Boracay. I figured I had nothing better to do anyway, so I went out (again) and I didn't tell anyone exactly where I was going. I made my way to Club Galaxy and eventually got a standing table there for around 1,000 Pesos. I just saw a few people dancing in the middle and the club kind of looked dead, to be honest. But I guess it's understandable since it's the off season. I had a guy pull me in the dancing crowd and I danced for a bit, but that was the extent of it. I went back and, since I had spent 1,000 Pesos on the table already, I bought some food. I didn't finish the food, though. Nothing much was happening aside from me standing and looking at the people dancing. There was an Indian dude that stood next to me and he was nice, he regularly checked up with me by nodding and stuff, which was nice. Eventually, I had to leave since nothing was happening and everyone was just located at their usual tables. I guess I just entered Boracay on a horrible season. I just decided to go home and it was really rainy outside and that's where I got into other stuff. Eventually, after the rain, I was able to settle back into the room and Nathan was still awake. We talked for a bit before I eventually went back to sleep. I eventually woke up when it was time for breakfast and we had breakfast at the usual restaurant across the street. After having breakfast, I noticed that the tide was really high this morning so I took a few pictures of it. I also noticed this large log wash up on the shore, so that was cool. The weather was also not that bad so I took a few pictures of the beach, Nate and his mom, and then they took a few pics of me. We then got ready because we just planned to walk around and buy stuff today. We went to E Mall, which was a bit away from D'Mall and we walked around for a bit across the stores and then through the shoreline. Suddenly, it hits me that it's a Monday and I'm *still* in Boracay. I wanted to enjoy this moment so I played the most "beach-like" song I know: Kolohe Kai's "Ehu Girl" and it was so fun listening to it while at the beach. It made me feel like I'm actually at the beach (even though I was), having fun, kicking it back, and just vibing along to the music. I also passed by another Boracay sand castle with today's date and I posted it on my IG Story. We passed by a few shops where we bought some souvenirs and Nathan gave me 2 free name tags and I made one for my sister Ailysh and for my friend Belle because I plan to meet her this June. We kept walking and then got to another Ice Flakes Boracay store where we ate and I tried that mango-coconut thing that Nate and his mom tried on the first day. It was nice! I loved the coconut and... the mango, a bit, because it was super sour. I still enjoyed it and we kept walking when it started to rain heavily. Thankfully, I brought my Cinnamoroll umbrella with me this time. We sought shelter inside D'Mall and the rain eventually stopped. We had lunch at Tres Amigos Boracay and I enjoyed the blue lemonade they had. It was a shame it wasn't bottomless or something, but it did have a crazy straw which I posted on my IG Story. I ordered a lot and even opted to build my own burrito because I want to taste some jalapeños. My burrito was so big, and I had quesadillas that I couldn't finish. I just ordered those for take-out as we walked around a bit more around D'Mall. I bought another of that cat with a ball of yarn tote bag which I'll decide to give to a friend. After that, we then eventually went back to the hotel room. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened. We spent the late afternoon having one more dip in the water before we had to return to Manila tomorrow. I went to the beach first and I saw how eerie the clouds looked before it made rainfall on land. I just enjoyed my time in the beach, despite being soaked and actually pelted by the rain. I made several wishes to God, mostly just wishing and hoping that I meet my soulmate or future wife soon. I said that I didn't care what difficulty I had to go through, I just want to meet her. Life's been lonely and it would really be more fun to have a person to share my days with. After making my wish, I just stayed partially in the salty water, but I didn't go far because I don't want to get swept out to sea. Eventually, Nathan's mom visits the beach and sits nearby, and I told them not to face the sea because the rain is painful and is coming from that way. I just spent my time with my back towards the sea and then Nathan's mom eventually left. I left soon afterward but went to the swimming pool nearby where Nathan and his mom were. I dove for a meter or so and then swam a bit, which was nice. I showed Nathan my Apple Watch and how it recorded depth, and then we eventually had to decide where to get dinner. Since the restaurant that Nathan wanted to visit was closed, we couldn't decide on a place for dinner. We eventually had enough of the swimming pool and went back to the hotel room to clean up and ready our stuff so that it'll be easy for us to leave tomorrow. Since I was bored and hungry, I wanted to have one last burger from 2 Brown Boys before I left Boracay so I took my wallet and some cash from Nathan because he wants a burger as well. I just had my Apple Watch and AirPods with me and left my iPhone in the room. I just thought that it would be fine bringint those 2 along but I had some weird audio issues. I couldn't play music at all until I restarted my watch, which fixed it. I got to 2 Brown Boys and I ordered the blue cheese burger for Nathan and I got the UFO burger for myself. I didn't do much and I just waited for the burgers to be cooked before returning back to the hotel room. After that, Nathan and I talked while eating the burgers.

Song of the day: Ehu Girl by Kolohe Kai

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Said it happened last night
About ten to eleven when I first laid eyes on you
We're standing in line
Into Club Triple 7, it was just like heaven
And a dream come true

We're standing in the right place at the right time
When you, this ehu girl, caused the crime

You're my pretty little ehu girl
Who made me a fool in love
You got my heart all in a whirl
And now, it needs cooling off
You set my heart on fire
And now, I don't know what to do
You set my heart on fire
And now, I'm so in love with you
My ehu girl

Parasailing!

Sun, 08 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average
Significant Location: Boracay

Day 2 of us in Boracay started with us still feeling really tired from yesterday and the rainy weather made us want to stay in our beds more. But we had to get up and get dressed so we can make our way to the restaurant across the street for our complementary breakfast. I got the hot choco and the food was nice, even though the portions were extremely small. Afterwards, we took a walk across the Boracay shoreline to Willy's Rock from the restaurant. We took a short walk and took some photos while on the way and then we went back to the hotel room to freshen up. We just stayed at the hotel room from morning to afternoon. By around 2 p.m. or so, we got hungry and they appointed me as the one who'll choose where we'll have lunch today. I searched for a few posts on Reddit about what good restaurants were open and I decided on Two Brown Boys Boracay since they seemed to have good burgers. We got dressed and left the hotel room by then. We had a hard time finding the location, but we eventually found it tucked inside an alleyway and it was thankfully close to D'Mall, so it was somewhere familiar and not that far. The interior of the place was actually really nice. We took a lot of photos and Nathan's mom was really impressed with my iPhone's camera. We took a few more photos before having our really big burgers served. Mine was big, **like an actual big burger**. The biggest burgers I have eaten before were from Zark's, but wow, this one was something unique. I had the Gusman burger and it had a whole sunny-side-up egg inside it, what the hell? It took a while for me to eat it and we took a while to finish our burgers. We were there for an hour or so and then we had to contact the guy Nathan's mom met recently because we want to avail the parasailing trip. We took a few photos and waited around for a bit before we got to the man-made floating harbor that the parasailing company set up, and then we took a boat to that floating harbor. We had to wait for a while and we had a couple go before us, but then it was our turn to go parasailing! The guys hoisted up this big balloon thing and it was starting to get swept by the wind as the boat was moving. We were attached to some harnesses and a kind of harness for our bodies and then we were off! I brought my iPhone with my and it was the scariest thing to be high up there. I was so scared that my phone was going to fall off (even though I always have my lanyard on it). I took some videos and a lot of photos while up there and it was just nice, even though the sea was kind of dark and the weather was a bit cloudy. I took a few pictures for my IG Story and we eventually were hoisted down to the boat and made our way back on shore from the floating harbor thing. Funny enough, **we were the last ones to go parasailing** and the employees rode with us on the boat back to the shore. It's also doubly funny once we got to the shore and were walking to the van that it started to rain so hard. It's funny because, had we been late by a few more minutes, or maybe an hour or so, we would be soaking wet and we might've not been able to go parasailing at all. Thankfully, the office of the parasailing company was just right next to our hotel. I guess that's also why Nathan's mom chose that company. For the rest of the night, we initially didn't have anything planned. We didn't even plan to have dinner. The rain was a big factor, too, since it just kept raining and raining. The staying in the hotel room, the rain, and just me scrolling on my phone watching videos eventually pissed me off because I could be doing all these things at home. I came to Boracay to enjoy and have a good vacation. So I made up an excuse to go out under the guise that I'd be withdrawing from the ATM (even though I still had thousands of Pesos in my wallet). Nathan, being the good friend that he is, accompanied me and we went out to places near D'Mall and we walked around for a bit. We ate some seafood at Boracay Uptown and the bill was expensive, around 2K for essentially 2 squids, a pork barbeque stick, and some pasta and bread. But I treated Nathan to it so it was fine. We listened to some live performers who sang a few songs and eventually watched a bit of a fire dancing performance before going out to walk around the shoreline in the evening. We were looking for some nightlife but we eventually figured out that there were none considering that it's an off season and that it's raining hard as fuck. We passed by Exit Bar which just had a bunch of foreign dudes hanging around, so we just continued to walk across the shoreline. We kept walking and walking until we got to the shoreline that was in front of our hotel. It actually surprised me how walkable it was and then Nate and I just went back to the hotel room. The night continued on with just me scrolling, which was kind of a bummer because I really wanted to make the most out of my trip.

Song of the day: Cold Heart - PNAU Remix by Elton John, Dua Lipa, PNAU

Boracayyyyyyy

Sat, 07 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Boracay

Today was finally it! After literal months of waiting, today would be the day I'd get to fly out to Boracay. Today started a little tense because I was super excited and worried for the trip. I wasn't sure if I had packed enough, but ultimately I was able to ensure that I had brought enough stuff for the trip. I was able to close my eyes and rest for a bit before waking up for my 5:30 a.m. alarm. When I woke up, I immediately got ready and booked a ride to the airport. Since I haven't had breakfast yet, I figured I'd have some breakfast at the Burger King near the arrivals area. I got a burger with some nuggets as my breakfast. At this point, I was talking to Nathan and he asked me to buy food for them, which I did. Leaving my bag (my clothes bag) at the seat so I can order is so anxiety-inducing. I was so scared and paranoid of my bag being stolen, even though it's just full of clothes and my valuables are with me. Thankfully, my worries were just that: worries. I was able to order food and then leave to get checked in afterwards. I was able to print out a stub or something for my flight and met up with Nathan and his mom shortly afterward. It really feels nice to be in NAIA again, it kind of just fills me with this feeling that I want to leave for good. But today's not that day since I'll just be on a domestic flight. Nathan tells me I shouldn't have brought my passport because we're just taking a domestic flight but I still bring it with me regardless. We wait for the flight and lounge a bit before ultimately boarding. Thankfully, I got a window seat! I was lucky enough to have a window seat for my flight and I'm sitting next to strangers, which is nice because Nathan would make me hold his Insta360 camera had we sat together and I was at the window seat. The plane takeoff was so loud and it's honestly been so long since I've been in an airplane. I don't remember it being this loud. After watching a lot of Air Crash Investigations on National Geographic, my fear of flying has only increased and it's making me paranoid right now. The plane eventually taxied on the runway **AND IT SPED UP**. I've been in fast-moving vehicles before, but this was the fastest. It was so surreal to see the ground and then have it disappear from view. It's also funny to see the many rain droplets on my window just streak away and vanish as the plane took off. The plane also had to turn around slightly which made it feel like a rollercoaster as it was ascending and turning. I was thankfully still able to capture the flight on video and post a part of it on my IG. The flight itself was absolutely scary. At one point, there was nothing to see outside the window but clouds. It wasn't turbulent, but it was still scary to see nothing but white outside of my window. It made for a surreal experience and felt like I was in heaven or something. I managed to charge my phone to an outlet that the plane had and I passed out while playing some K-Pop songs. After waking up, we eventually reached the skies near Caticlan/Godofredo P. Ramos Airport. I was surprised at how the wings and the flaps swayed in the air, which kind of frightened me. But after doing some quick research, I found out that it was normal and I was just overly paranoid. We got off the plane and I bought a Boracay-themed bag with knotted rope as the bag's handle. I also got a water bottle because I didn't bring one. We made our way from the airport to Boracay after an hour or so of commuting, even via ferry. Nathan mostly stuck to me but I kind of felt like I wanted to be alone and just look out to the sea and surroundings. We rode an e-tricycle that took us directly to where we were staying at: Diamond Water Edge Resort. I was surprised to have ended up in Boracay, though, and I took a lot of pictures while it was still sunny out. We got into the hotel and checked it, and then we unpacked all our bags. We rested for a bit as we were all tired and a bit sleep-deprived. By the time we woke up, it was around mid-afternoon and we left so we can eat. We took another tricycle to Meze Wrap, which Nathan and his mom recommended since they've tried this before. We took pictures and I paid for their meal since I had money in my Gcash. I tried some skewers and they were pretty good. It was nice and then we shopped for a bit around D'Mall. I found a shop that had such a cute tote bag. It had a cute cat holding a yarn ball and I wanted it for myself, but I then decided to just give it to my sister when I get back. We walked to the beach and that's when it started to rain. I took some pictures with my iPhone and, thankfully, the pictures didn't come out as stormy as I'd hoped. But the rain was getting stronger so we sought shelter at an ice cream shop nearby. It was Ice Flakes Boracay and it seemed like some kind of Korean ice cream shop. We ate some ice cream and I ordered the matcha one, while Nathan and his mom shared this coconut mango one. I liked mine and it had cute googly eyes, which I just had to post on my IG Story. We ate there for a bit, then went back to the entrance of D'Mall and bought a few things at Budget Mart. I bought a Cinnamoroll cologne because it was cute, a big bottle of Pocari Sweat, the strawberry Samanco fish that I like, and a spicy cheese Buldak cup. I first tried to use my credit card and, to my surprise, it worked. So that was nice to have some stuff purchased. We went back to the hotel room because it was starting to rain really bad. For the rest of the evening, we didn't do anything much. We didn't even eat out, we just spent it in the hotel room and I ate the spicy Buldak cup.

Song of the day: Sucker by Jonas Brothers

Journal entry for Friday, June 6th, 2025

Fri, 06 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: Bonifacio High Street

Today, I just wanted to cut myself some slack from all that's happening in life and to set the mood for what's going to happen tomorrow at Boracay. I really just wanted to think of myself and my plans for today. Plus, as a consolation, I decided to gift myself something. For today, I just made some software preparations, updated my sites, server, PC, whatnot. I also added in a location thing that shows my significant location for that specific journal entry and have retroactively added it to some recent dates. So that was something productive. Since the weather was favorable, I decided to go out to treat myself in BGC. I didn't need any earbuds at all, I still love my same-old Samsung Galaxy Buds 2 Pro and I've been fine using it with my iPhone. But AirPods are the only "cheap enough" gift I could get myself. I gave my Galaxy Buds to my sister who'll definitely love it more than I do. I booked a ride to BGC and got myself AirPods Pros with the USB C case. I also bought a few accessories like a bundled powerbank and extra Bluetooth headphones for only 1K that was on sale. Then I got an AirTag to use on Milktea's collar. I'm actually surprised I spent that much money but I didn't flinch from spending that much, which doesn't sound like a good feeling. But it's okay because I know I'm spending it all for myself (and my cat), so it's all worth it. I sat at a bench thinking about the people I was with a few years before. That group who all had iPhones, talked on iMessage and showed off their latest Apple products, and I was always seen as different because I had a 2nd-hand Samsung Android who couldn't iMessage with them. It's funny how I'm the one now who has all of the latest, brand-new shit from Apple. The latest and most expensive iPhone model, the latest Apple Watch, and now the latest AirPods. I guess part of me is petty and wants to get back at them because they were such materialistic people when I just loved using my old Samsung phone, even if it was just a 2nd-hand phone I bought at Greenhills. Since I didn't feel like eating yet, I went to the Starbucks on Bonifacio High Street nearby but the line took a while, I just decided to walk a bit more to my "favorite place" in BGC, which was Starbucks on 32nd Street. I got my order and I really missed just having a MacBook and coding/doing work on here like I used to. I really should get a new laptop soon. Eventually, it started to rain and it rained like hell. I didn't want to get stranded so I immediately booked a ride home. Thankfully, I got an Angkas ride and I was able to still enjoy the ride home despite it raining so heavily. The thunder was so loud, too. But I thankfully made it okay and the rider sought shelter nearby. I had to ask my sister to come pick me up with an umbrella because my stupid ass didn't carry one (although, it didn't seem like it would rain when I left). Thankfully, the paper bag carrying all of the boxes and stuff was still relatively-dry and I unpacked and charged all of the new stuff I would bring for my vacation trip tomorrow. I also packed my bags and I'd be using the same Dice bag I got last Christmas. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened. I mostly packed and got everything organized for my trip to Boracay for the next few days. I haven't had a proper vacation in a long time and I really just want to rest and recoup. I've dealt with so much over the past few years and the last thing I could give myself is a vacation. I couldn't sleep much for the rest of the day because I was excited for tomorrow and also because I'm watching over Milktea and hoping that he's okay.

Song of the day: Last Rizzday Night (T.G.I.R.) by Jelly House

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Last rizzday night, yeah, we rizzed up all the gyatts
And we griddied on the opps, think we streamed, but I got doxxed
Last rizzday night, yeah, we readied up our squads
And ate Feastable bars, IShowSpeed jumped over cars
Last rizzday night, we went streaming with John Pork
Livvy rizzed up Baby Gronk, then we canceled Eminem
Last rizzday night, I got plus ten thousand aura
Kai Cenat, we're gonna rizz in Ohio

But this rizzday night
Skibidi again
But this rizzday night
Skibidi again

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot

Thu, 05 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today wasn't Christmas-themed or anything, and today kind of made me feel the most sorrow out of all days recently, but today was just weirdly interesting. The morning started with me doing a check on myself to see if I'm fit enough to go to the office. I woke up with a bit more sleep today and my stomach wasn't that bad, so I decided to get ready. While I was just lying in bed, I could hear my neighbors playing "Like I'm Gonna Lose You" and that kind of set the tone/mood for the day. I've been thinking about it for a while, but, in the morning, I eventually found out that I kind of did lose a person recently. I just found out when I checked IG and that kind of put a damp on things. I took it to mean that we're just back to being strangers or I'm out of their life, and then I got on with my morning and commuted to the office. While on the way there, I suddenly thought of that poem from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004). I wanted to read that part so bad but I couldn't since I was on a motorcycle. It wasn't until after I safely arrived in the office where I read the t from Alexander Pope's poem that was read in the movie: >How happy is the blameless vestal's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd; I looked up what it meant and what vestals were because I didn't know what they were. Apparently, they're just nuns. Forgetting the world and, in turn, being forgotten by the world. Spotless and unburdened by pain of regret, scars, memories. With no wishes to make to God, all their prayers are accepted. I kept circling back to that idea because I've been having a lot of regrets lately. Struggle, strife, pain. I seriously hate all of it. Losing friends, relationships, even people that I wish to get along with. I'm kind of regretting putting myself out into the world and I have this feeling that I just want to be left alone and not bother anyone. For a good part of the day, part of me just wanted to be like them, a blameless vestal (despite being male). I just have my site that anyone can check, but I don't overtly advertise my site and send links to everybody. In due time, people will forget about my site, a place the world forgot. These were my thoughts as my coworkers and I were out for lunch and we ate at Landmark. I just got lemon chicken from the store I ate at last month and we went to get Zus Coffee after. It was fun because they kept teasing me and I was able to laugh at it, despite feeling a bit sad and grieving inside. We went back to the office and I continued my usual round of tasks. I was, weirdly enough, really productive today as well. I cleared up a big backlog recently and I'm just making sure stuff doesn't pile up on my plate next week. I was even productive enough to fix that Converge issue I've been dealing with since last week. In the afternoon, I had finished all of my tasks early. I had free time and a coworker asked if I had free time and I did, so we played this board game called Radlands. I had to watch a loooooonnnnngggg YouTube tutorial for it and my coworker had to tell me the mechanics and give me a tutorial first, so it took a while before we actually got going. But we played our first game. That actually *was* their first game, which surprised me because they own the damn board game. But I'm surprised I got a good card that they didn't counter and I won! I'm surprisingly good at board games lol. But we played another round after that, which dragged on and I eventually lost. It's okay, I'm glad I had fun and I was able to take a break from all this thinking in my headspace. For the evening, I just made sure I was clean on tickets and all the stuff I had to do. We went out for dinner which was just KFC nearby and we talked about a few stuff, mostly how one coworker often goes to Europe every year, which made my eyes light up because I've been dreaming of going to Europe. We finished our food and went back to the office so we could pack up and leave for the night. We were concerned because it was raining so heavily. I was concerned as well because I was fucked. I wasn't getting any motorcycle rides back home and the only method of transportation was by booking a private car, which costed me 600 Pesos. Yikes. I even asked my sister to help me book for one because I was getting nothing, but they were able to secure a ride and I was able to thankfully rest on the car ride home. The car ride home took an hour or so. The driver kind of talked to me here and there, which kind of made me feel uncomfortable because I just wanted to be left alone and relax while listening to the radio. I also listened to a short video essay about the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. They talked about how Joel and Clementine were doomed in a cycle of meeting, breaking up, and forgetting each other. It just resonated with me because I've been in that cycle before. It made me a bit sad when they did say that the way they were able to overcome it was by still choosing each other despite what comes in their way. Hearing that kind of pierced me through the heart because I've only seen people I loved leave me or not choose me. They usually push me away after some time. Not just in a romantic sense, but yeah, in that way as well. It also made me think of the people I chose to move away from, the people who chose me but I didn't like them back and didn't choose them. I just thought about how love is so difficult and the defining feature of couples that work is that they always choose each other in the end. After a long ride, I finally got home and unloaded all my stuff. I still had productive stuff to do in the evening, organizing, cleaning up, deleting files, whatnot. Cleaning up made me feel a lot better, too. I had my sister and Milktea come in for a bit and I got to play with Milktea, so that was nice. But at the end of the day, I just wanted nothing more than to read the full verse by Alexander Pope which the "eternal sunshine" verses came from: Eloisa to Abelard. It was a long read, but I liked the story. It feels weird, but I share Eloisa's pain. A few of the lines stuck to me: > Come! with thy looks, thy words, relieve my woe; Those still at least are left thee to bestow. Still on that breast enamour'd let me lie, Still drink delicious poison from thy eye, Pant on thy lip, and to thy heart be press'd; Give all thou canst—and let me dream the rest. These lines are so funny. I've been in toxic, "poison"-ous love like that before. Where I had been suffering, but seeing that person and them talking to me relieved me of all my woes. Where they gave me all they could and I just dreamt of being with them. > Forget, renounce me, hate whate'er was mine. Fair eyes, and tempting looks (which yet I view!) Long lov'd, ador'd ideas, all adieu! I don't know why, but I just feel like I'm eventually forgotten by the people I've long loved. All those adored ideas of having fun with them, the plans I drew up of us having fun like baking a cake or going out for pares late at night like we used to, of "what could be" are just gone. I stuck to those lines because, even now, I still feel sad over the so many "what could have been"s in my life. And I guess that ties into the underlying question of today. If people will eventually forget about me, should I just forget everything, too? As if things never happened? Like in the movie? > Then, ages hence, when all my woes are o'er, When this rebellious heart shall beat no more; If ever chance two wand'ring lovers brings To Paraclete's white walls and silver springs, O'er the pale marble shall they join their heads, And drink the falling tears each other sheds; Then sadly say, with mutual pity mov'd, "Oh may we never love as these have lov'd!" Ultimately, I don't know, haha. I highlighted these last lines on my notes app because all of these stories about love, fighting, forgetting just makes me sad. I look back at my past and I just see the same cycle over and over again. I'm really sick of it. I really do hope I never may find love like that anymore. Hopefully the type of love that finds me in the future won't put me through that vicious cycle again and again. I'm so broken from seeing the same type of love (friendly, romantic, otherwise) just repeat in a cycle. I just want to be happy to find love that chooses me, one that doesn't love me in the same way my past ones have.

Song of the day: Like I'm Gonna Lose You by Meghan Trainor, John Legend

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I found myself dreaming in silver and gold
Like a scene from a movie that every broken heart knows
We were walking on moonlight, and you pulled me close
Split second and you disappeared and then I was all alone

I woke up in tears, with you by my side
A breath of relief, and I've realised
No, we're not promised tomorrow

Christmas in June!

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was super Christmas-themed, what the hell. It didn't start out this way, though. I woke up feeling a bit better than yesterday. I started my morning feeling more okay than yesterday, too. I wasn't sure if I was "okay" and, more importantly, diarrhea-free enough to go to the office. I thought about how the stalls there weren't that good but wasn't sure if I'd risk it. My friend eventually messages me and checks on up on my stomachache, which kind of shocked me for a bit because I thought things were kind of over after yesterday. It was still awkward and I had a heavy heart while talking to them because I still feel guilty, I'm apprehensive, and I'm playing it safe. Still, it was really nice and thoughtful of them to check up on me. I just told them what happened to me yesterday and I eventually had to prepare because I've made up my mind that I'll leave for the office today. Today seems like a good, sunny day anyway. I don't want to commute on a future date where it'll rain. I got a ride to work and eventually got there just fine. The seats were **PACKED**, though, and there was a lot of people in the booth today. I had to sit at another seat because the one I usually occupied was already taken by someone else, and I also felt guilty taking a seat that wasn't mine because I just saw 1 dude (who usually sits at this one) look so confused. He sat at another seat somewhere else I don't know, so it was pretty cringey for me to see him wonder where to sit. Another one of my seatmates also didn't know where to sit so they sat somewhere else. I did my usual round of tasks and got started on work. After a while, I called my ISP to have the account transferred from being under my grandma's name, to my name since I handle all of the bills anyway. I had submitted her death certificate yesterday and I was just catching up on emails in the office pantry for a while. I eventually got all of that done and I was able to catch my coworkers leaving for lunch. I'm glad that I was able to catch up with them and we went downstairs. We passed by the Denny's cat who was sleeping in their usual cathouse so I took a pic of them sleeping and posted it on my IG Story. We kept walking and eventually arrived at Mad Mark's Creamery and Coffee where we had lunch again. We just ate and talked stuff like the rising HIV cases, especially amongst Gen Z, which they pointed out that I was a part of. It kind of hurt me inside to hear them say the "kids these days" line and it offended me, to an extent, because I don't sleep around like that. Our lunch eventually got served and had a bit of a kerfuffle when it came to paying, which ate a bit out of my time because I was late to my 1:00 p.m. meeting. After we got out of the restaurant, **I RAN BACK AS FAST AS I CAN** back to the office and it was tiring as hell. I was so out of breath just to get back to the office and I just found out that the meeting for today was at 1:30 p.m., not 1:00 p.m. So I did all that running for nothing. But it was fine, I killed the time by doing some tasks before the meeting. I got into the meeting and the people around me were so loud, which made my teammates ask where I was because it was unusually loud, and I told them that I was in the office today. But the meeting ended just fine and I continued on my day. Somehow, I just had a feeling that I miss Christmas. I tried to find that IG page that shares Reels about Christmas during the other months, and I eventually found one about thinking of Christmas while in June and I shared it on my Story. I really love the feeling of Christmas, and I really miss it at this point. Family, friends, loved ones, and just the general ease that time of year has. I kind of miss it so I just listened to Christmas songs during my shift. I couldn't stop listening to Christmas songs, and I loved them all. I wanted to have a Christmas-themed day because I could kind of use a little warmth and a safe space. I also laughed around with my coworkers, which lifted my mood a lot. I had stomachache in the latter part of my shift, but I was able to handle it and continue working (and playing Christmas songs). I eventually finish all of the tasks and my plate, and them some, and eventually made my way home by booking a ride. The ride home was so scary! The motorcycle rider drove so fast and it was terrifying. He also was a bit chatty, which I kind of found hard to understand while listening to "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" and other Christmas hits. It was fun, but also really terrifying because I didn't know if I'd make it to next Christmas. Luckily, I made it home in one piece and... didn't have anything else to do for the evening. I was bored so, to fully enjoy this out-of-place Christmas day, I thought it'd be nice if I wrapped it up with a Christmas movie. I immediately thought of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. It has a runtime of 2 hours, but, since I started watching at 9 p.m., I figured that I'd still have enough time left in the day to do other stuff. I microwaved an extra-butter popcorn bag and made the poor man's version of hot cocoa (a warm, sacheted chocolate drink that my sister thankfully bought for me), and watched the movie. I watched Home Alone and it was pretty funny. It's been a long time since I watched it, so I forgot the plot, but it was funny and warm-feeling at times. It made me miss my family spending time on Christmas a bit. I was surprised when Kevin said something in the movie that resonated with me. > I always think I'll have a lot of fun if I'm alone, but when I'm alone, it isn't that much fun at all. I don't care how much people bug me sometimes, I'd rather be with somebody than by myself. Sometimes I wonder if I'm only extroverted because I can't handle being alone, but I know I can. I have been alone most of my life and single for the entirety of it. But when I find something fun or interesting, I have no one to share my joy with. It made me miss *someone* a bit because they always invited me to play video games and watch stuff with. I also remembered that day where they made me watch "Christmas Tree Farm" by Taylor Swift. But they're out of my life now, so, I just have no one but myself for the foreseeable future. What Kevin said just stuck to me because I've been feeling very alone for a long time now. The movie eventually ended around 11:55 p.m. and I think I shed a few tears here and there. I didn't finish my popcorn, though, but I was able to finish my cocoa and I can say that I really had fun today. Even if it wasn't Christmas today.

Song of the day: Last Christmas by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance, but you still catch my eye
Tell me, baby, do you recognize me?
Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me
"Merry Christmas," I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you," I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kiss me now, I know you'd fool me again

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

A crowded room and friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God, I thought you were someone to rely on
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A girl undercover but you tore her apart
Maybe this year
Maybe this year I'll give it to someone special

'Cause last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Journal entry for Tuesday, June 3rd, 2025

Tue, 03 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad

Today started with me having my stomach churn. I felt something bad, but I didn't know that it would be happening to me. I couldn't sleep much and I was tossing and turning in bed as my stomach started to ache really bad. I woke up feeling so tired and exhausted, despite getting my usual 5-or-so-hours of sleep. I decided on whether or not I'd take a sick leave for work, but I decided against it. I just had to power through today because I have 2 leaves in the upcoming week. I was talking to a friend by this time and they were really nice and friendly. In the morning, it seemed that today was just going to go great, despite my stomachache. But things kind of took a turn for the worse come afternoon. Part of me knew I screwed up and, while I tried to apologize, I don't think my apologies were accepted. There was this looming feeling that everything's starting to crumble and my stomachache had devolved into full on diarrhea making me super thirsty and tired. I didn't show that to anyone but I was trying my best to nurse myself in the background while juggling between work, my health, and other things. I got myself Pocari Sweat and some medicine, and I also got myself *lugaw* to feel better because I haven't eaten anything all day. I only ate a bit, but didn't have much appetite as my stomach was giving me the worst time. I kept going back and forth to the bathroom and kept getting tired. I just felt so beaten up today and it's kind of sad that I just found myself in another situation like this again. Things just feel really broken today in a way that probably won't be repaired. Work continued on and I tried to do as much as I can despite being bedridden and going back and forth in the bathroom. After my shift ended, I continued to just get some more sleep. I just decided to get my health back up, despite still having stomachache and diarrhea the whole night. I tried to catch up with my journal entries and other things just to salvage the day and stop it into turning to an awful day. At the end of the day, I saw a video on IG Reels about how people having a rough year, thinking that 2025 would be a good year and finding themselves sad by June. I also read a comment about a person saying that they lost so many people and broke so many relationships, and I can't help but laugh and feel so sad about it because I could relate. I just tried my best to finish up my journal entries after that.

Song of the day: I Really Want to Stay at Your House by Samuel Kim, Lorien

Lyrics that resonated with me:
'Cause I really wanna stay at your house
And I hope this works out

A Thousand and One Emotions

Mon, 02 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Monday was mostly pretty boring for me. I mostly timed in for work and talked to a friend. They told me earlier that I could find a safe space in them, which was nice. On one hand, I kind of felt happy but, at the same time, the happiness was just laced with uncertainty because I just had a feeling things will blow up soon. Regardless, work went on and it wasn't anything noteworthy. My shift started and ended just as quickly. I didn't eat much throughout the day because I was so busy and I was doing so much. Come evening, my sister brought home *menudo* and I ate that. Since I was bored, I tried to feel productive by doing a few things and sending out emails. I tried to rest after that, but I couldn't because my stomach was starting to turn. I felt a lot of emotions and thoughts today that just ended up making me feel confused and unsure. It all averaged out by having this day just be average.

Song of the day: Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Oh, I
I want to be with you everywhere
Oh, I
I want to be with you everywhere
(Wanna be with you everywhere)

Baguettes with Special Guests

Sun, 01 Jun 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: SM Megamall

I felt really anxious about how today would turn out. I know the reason, but something inside me just felt like things weren't going to end well today. But I'm glad Ane did a reading on me yesterday and told me that things would be all right. Eventually, after tiring myself out, I eventually slept. The morning was super interesting. But first, of course, I had some breakfast. It wasn't much and I was pretty much set to leave for the morning since us Baguettes agreed to meet at 10 a.m. I booked a ride and hurriedly left the house and that's when I noticed something. I was missing my wallet! I was fiddling in the motorcycle ride but I just know for sure that I left it at home. I asked my sister to pack it up along with some paper trash that I can just throw away. I also had to ask her to put my small bottle of Listerine mouth wash in there for good measure. After preparing a literal bag of trash with only my wallet and mouthwash in it as valuables, I had the bag shipped from my house to SM Megamall while I was on the ride there. Obviously, I got to SM Megamall first and I just waited around, had matcha at Starbucks, and kept waiting for my wallet and stuff to arrive. Eventually, the driver arrived and at the right spot, too! I'm able to get my wallet and mouthwash, and I breathed a large sigh of relief. I went on to meet Meryll at Watsons and I couldn't find her, and Max was here already but I didn't see either of them until I turned the corner and found them together already. We walked around for a bit and then decided here to have lunch. While walking, I told them that there was a food convention upstairs and that I would be meeting a friend there, but they were open to checking it out as well after lunch. Meryll suggested Bad Bird and I was okay with it, and so was Max. We immediately got a table and we just talked about life, career and the general things we were up to while eating. I also revealed to them that I would be meeting up with a new friend I had met online and I gave a short introduction about my friend and what they does. I told them about her and a short summary of how things have been between us. After eating, we took a quick break before going upstairs and checking out the food convention itself. It was packed with people. We tried out a few free samples given out and Max was really interested in this bottle of mead, which kind of had a hint of cinnamon for me. She bought it and got a tote bag. We kept walking and we tried this cocoa booth which us 3 got samples of, and I bought Max and Meryll packs each. We also take a pic by a sari-sari store and I ask a female guard to take a photo of us 3. By this time, I messaged my friend that we were here already and they went to meet me (us) at the entrance. They immediately recognized me and I immediately recognized them. We immediately talked to each other and they showed us the book that was on display. We asked the person manning the counter about the details of how to get the book, and we essentially had to listen to the book's author finish their whole talk. Afterward, we asked my friend to tag along with us while we explore the rest of the exhibit. They were really nice and kind enough to introduce us to their parents, which were also super nice. I had a lot of stuff written about them but I'll just keep it hidden on my private copy. We exit the convention center for now and we walk around the mall. Max has things to do so we had to wait for her a bit but we continued on and went downstairs to the bowling alley place, and we also pass by a Genshin artbook that Max and Meryll take interest in. We don't linger for long as we head into the bowling alley and try to get a lane. Meryll's going to sit this activity out so it's just Max and I, but the waiting time for an available lane is 30-40 minutes, which seems risky because we had to go to back to the convention center soon. We then check out the wait time for a KTV and ping pong table, both of which were 30 minutes to 1 hour away from an available table. So we just pass on it since we're scrapped for time. We try Arrowland and the waiting time was the same, around 20-30 minutes and we'd play for 20-30 minutes, which would put us at a hard position. We walk for a while and Max's tote bag breaks. It absolutely breaks the bottle of mead and it spills out on the floor. I reach out to a janitor that was thankfully wheeling around a cart as well, so thankfully he was able to help us dispose of the leaking mead bottle. Max also suffered a super small cut because she got in contact with a shard of glass, but thankfully the cut wasn't that deep. I just promise Max that I'll buy her another bottle for the trouble. Since we were already exhausted, we just find a table chill on for a while. My friend messages me about a few things and that the event is starting, and that they were also handing out claim stubs for the cookbook. I tell Max and Meryll this and we had to head back to the convention floor. My friend and their parents let us sit next to them, which was really nice and we eventually got cookbooks. My friend and their family eventually come back to the table and we talk for a while, and eventually Max and Meryll return with their copies. We talk for a bit more before deciding to wrap up our stay at the convention. Thankfully, I managed to ask them if they could take a pic with us and I ask the same guard earlier to take a picture of us 4. We then walk around trying to find the cinemas and I ask the guard for directions. I also ask where the groceries were so Max can buy a stronger tote bag from there. We decided that it was best for us to split up. I just wait in line to buy tickets for 3 of us since I'm the one paying. Regardless, I made it up to the front desk after a long line and I got the three tickets. I waited by Meryll and asked where Max was, because I thought that the two of them would be going together. Eventually, Max returned with her new tote bag which was Japan-themed. Then we watched Lilo and Stitch and I enjoyed the movie enough. I didn't expect to watch this today, but I'm glad I did. After that, we were mostly focused on getting home so Max and I booked via ride-hailing apps. We both quickly got a ride and our drivers kind of arrived at relatively the same time, so that was nice. I got home and just rested for the evening after that.

Song of the day: Toothbrush by DNCE

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Baby, you don't have to rush
You can leave a toothbrush at my place, at my place
We don't need to keep it hush
You could leave a toothbrush at my place, at my place

Journal entry for Saturday, May 31st, 2025

Sat, 31 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday started with me still staying at Nicole and her cousin's hotel room. They were mostly talking amongst each other and I was talking to my friend on my phone. I eventually ask them for some songs they can recommend to me on Spotify and I'm glad I got a Spotify playlist from them. I decided to just play this playlist while on the ride home. I also kept refilling the water jug because I was so thirsty from all that happened last night. I also found out that John, a former classmet of Nicole and I, also attended the event! I'm shocked that I keep ending up at the same places as him, but never actually meeting him. I messaged him and told him that I was at the event, too, and so was Nicole. After a while, my phone eventually got enough charge. Nicole's cousin asked me to heat up the water so they could pour into the Knorr cup and then make some mushroom soup. They offered me one but I declined because I'm going to sleep soon. I then went downstairs and asked Nicole to accompany me because the elevator didn't work without a hotel room key card. She dropped me off at the lobby where I just waited and talked to John about meeting up with Nicole for day 2 of the event. I booked a ride and played that recommended playlist containing songs from The Rose. I enjoyed it and it was nice hearing "city lights" as I was moving away from Okada's lights. I eventually got home and got a large amount of sleep. I was eventually woken up at around 11 a.m. by my uncle so that he could give me my cousin's payment for the electric bill. I woke up on time, but I felt really tired and groggy the whole day. Regardless, I tried to be productive by getting all my websites and other things up-to-date. I was really productive today, all things considered. It was only 4 hours of me being awake and I had already done so much. By this time, a friend told me that they had plans to attend an event tomorrow at SM Megamall. I told them that I'd be going to SM Megamall tomorrow as well, which was a complete shocker because I had never imagined that I would be there at the same place tomorrow. They invited me to meet up with them for a bit while the event was going on and I felt happy, but also honored to be meeting up with them so soon. For the rest of the day, I mostly just talked to them and did some catching up on the work that I've been putting off. At the end of the night, though, I felt a bit of anxiety for tomorrow so I asked Ane to do a tarot reading to see if things will go well tomorrow. Thankfully, she did say that things will be okay tomorrow and I felt assured in that. I stayed up doing other things because I kind of wasted my weekend by waking up so close to noon.

Song of the day: Sorry by The Rose

Lyrics that resonated with me:
물들어 버린 city lights

171 Heart Beats per Minute

Fri, 30 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

# TODAY WAS FINALLY THE DAY! THE DAY I ATTEND A RAVE TO SEE ZEDD PERFORMING IN MANILA! I was pretty excited for what was ahead today, but it mostly began with me starting out my day normally. Today starts like how my usual days start and I'm going to the office since it's a Friday. I was also talking to my friend in the morning and I had to excuse myself from the conversation since I had to leave and tuck my phone in my pocket. I got a ride fairly quick and I got to the office just fine, I just played songs from Fearless during the trip because that was the last song/album playing on my Apple Watch. When I got to the office, I saw a few messages from my friend about my journal and they actually corrected me because I got the "rising" sign wrong. I was a Cancer rising and I had penned in Capricorn rising. I issued a few corrections on my phone and went on to have a normal workday at the office. For lunch, we had it early and I had to accompany a coworker move their car around and we talked about a few things while on the car ride. They were joking that we were going to go to SM Mall of Asia, but they were only joking because I'm always in a hurry for my 1 p.m. meeting. But we just got the car re-parked and we had lunch at Nanyang nearby. After lunch, nothing much happened aside from me finishing my daily work tasks, attending meetings, and the usual stuff. I booked a ride home and the driver said that he didn't have a raincoat on him. I thought about it, but decided that it's okay if I get drenched in the rain. I was already hurrying to get to Okada Manila anyway, so I decided to take what I could get. I got on that ride and took a photo of me getting drenched in the rain, which I sent to my friend. After getting home, I quickly change into my party clothes and book a ride to Okada Manila. Thankfully, it didn't rain that much and I wore a super-comfortable outfit. The trip there was pretty much okay, but I don't know why, I just felt a bit of sadness while on the road. I kind of circled back to that idea that I'm not going to make it and that I'd lose the whole 3,000-day thing. But, whatever, it's fine. I eventually found clarity by just accepting that everything won't matter in 3,000 days. I eventually arrived in Okada after a relatively-long ride there. When I got there, my mobile data signal was kind of horrendeous. I'm glad I had enough signal to be able to transfer some money to Gcash and withdraw it, but when I actually went to the event floor, I couldn't connect to the Internet at all. It's also weird that I just passed by the guards in going to the event floor. I just strolled in, which seemed wrong because you're usually given lanyards and bracelets in events like this, but I just waltzed in. Signal was horrible in there, anyway, so I just went outside again and asked Nicole how to get a lanyard/bracelet so I can properly get in this time. I also asked an event organizer and walked all the way to the proper booth where they're handing out the hand lanyards. I made my way back to the event floor to meet up with Nicole. It was really hard to contact Nicole because signal was really horrendeous, just like my last concert. I just used the built-in 5G modem on my iPhone instead of using the Samsung Wi-Fi device I had. It worked, thankfully, and I was able to talk to my friend and then Nicole. I eventually met up with Nicole and she gave me a glowing scrunchie as a gift, which was really nice of her. She introduced me to her cousin, which was just sitting nearby. I thought she'd bring her boyfriend, but I guess her cousin is also a nice surprise. We buy some energy drinks because we were really thirsty, and I also asked her to buy something alcoholic. I got some kind of rum and cola **AND IT WAS HORRIBLE**. It tasted bad, and for 400 Pesos, it seemed like a rip-off. We drank the drinks for a while before returning to the main stage/dance floor. I don't remember which DJ was playing, but they had some okay tracks. There was one of the spinning cat meme and the "You have to lock in" video clip by Chaewon, which was nice. But for the rest of the set, it was just "okay" so I spent my time talking to my friend about other things. I eventually learn something which kind of made me a bit sad, but I just tried to continue on with the rave while talking to them. After that, Euro Trash was playing and I just excused myself from Nicole and her cousin because I really couldn't handle how hungry I am anymore. I knew it was a long night ahead so I really made use of this 1 hour before Zedd to just eat. I walked around Okada and I was so lost inside. It felt like an indoor maze. I was looking for restaurants—especially any fast food joint—so I can just eat. I also had signal and Internet connection again, so I replied to my friend even though it was a bit late. Eventually, I found a Jollibee nearby and I lined up, which took a little long. I ordered food at the kiosk, but apparently, I selected the option to pay at the counter instead of paying directly at the kiosk. Had I decided to pay there, I wouldn't have needed to line up, but whatever. I eventually paid, waited for my food, and thought about my circumstances for a bit. I kind of was just feeling "meh" at this point and even kind of sad, I just tried to shrug off my feelings by eating up and getting enough energy for the rest of the night. After eating, I quickly went back to the stage/dance floor to see Zedd playing. It was around 11:30 p.m. at this point and I'm glad I kind of made it just in time. But when I got there, the guards weren't letting anyone in for some reason. Most of the people were just waiting outside. I never found out why, but I guess they were hesitant to let more people in because they felt like the stage could collapse, or something. I also talked with 2 cool guys while in the line and one called me his "rave buddy" which was nice. Eventually, they started letting a few people in as Zedd's set was starting and I was able to get in with those 2 cool guys. I had to peel away from them, though, because I wanted to find Nicole and her cousin. I had to squeeze through the crowd because they were so far away and it's extremely packed by now. Squeezing through was a hassle. I remember the general area where Nicole and her cousin were, though, and I tried to find Nicole by noticing which person had glowing scrunchies in the crowd. I thankfully found her and, after a bit of squeezing through, I was reunited with Nicole and her cousin again. They were glad to see me, thankfully, and were also glad I made it in time. I got so many messages from Nicole during my break but I really am glad everything worked out. We partied hard to Zedd's entire set and I was dancing so much. Some of Zedd's songs were super hype and I remember listening to them back in the 2010s. I just kept dancing and dancing, until I had the idea to check the Heart Rate app on my Apple Watch. I recorded 171 BPM, the most I've ever seen! Nicole's cousin also measured his heart rate, and his was just at around 150 BPM. Even he was shocked at my current heart rate. But I just kept partying and partying. I also recorded some videos for my IG Story and posted some as soon as I recorded them, although most were just stuck on uploading because there was absolutely no more signal in here, and this is despite using my iPhone 16 Pro Max's cellular connection. My battery is about to die, too! Which made me worry a bit, but I just decided to stick around with Nicole and her cousin after Zedd's set so I could charge my phone in their hotel room. Zedd's set was awesome and it hard everything. It had fire, smoke machines, confetti, lazers, and he ended the set by speaking to the crowd and being grateful that he's in Manila again. He played Clarity as his last song and it was super hype. It ended with a large amount of confetti bursting onto the crowd and that was that. After Zedd's set, a lot of people had left by then, including us. We were all tired and we needed water. At this point, I got a message from my friend and I was surprised that they were still awake. I kind of glad that they were awake, though, because I've been waiting to talk to them again. Nicole, her cousin, and I made our way to the 7-Eleven nearby and I pass by the 2 dudes I had bumped into earlier and I greet them as well as thank them. We got to the 7-Eleven and I got a big bottle of C2 red while Nicole and her cousin gets food and drinks of their own. We left Okada to walk to their hotel room nearby. I was walking with Nicole and she just leaned on my shoulder because she was super tired by now. I also carried the stuff we bought. We eventually made it to the hotel nearby and went inside their room where I just charged my phone and talked to my friend while waiting to get to a decent level of charge. I took a lot of water and just waited in the hotel room until I had charged my phone enough.

Song of the day: Clarity (feat. Foxes) by Zedd

invisible strings

Thu, 29 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Wow, today was pretty weird. Today was Thursday so I spent the early morning just getting to the office. I also asked my friend a question and commuted to the office. While walking, I found this thing on a wall and it turned out to be this **big and beautiful moth**. I actually didn't know if this was a butterfly, but considering how brown it was, it was probably a moth. I posted it on my IG Story because it just looked beautiful. I eventually went to my desk and my workday started. Nothing much went on throughout most of the morning. I had lunch out with the team as usual and I had that grilled squid because I liked it so much last time. We just had a small conversation about the work laptop and I recounted my experience with it, but that was mostly it. We went back and I stopped by Zus Coffee to get some matcha. It actually took a long time! I waited for at least 20 minutes just standing! It was the longest matcha I ever waited for. When I eventually got tired of standing around, I approached them and asked if my drink was ready, and apparently it already was. What happened was that they read the order *number* not who ordered the name. I wasn't given a receipt so I didn't know what number mine was, and apparently it was ready this whole time. I didn't know whether to feel annoyed or not, but I just went back to my desk as fast as I can in case anyone messaged, and thankfully, no one did. I just followed up on my tasks. Since I had time to kill in the afternoon, I played a few quick rounds of board games with some of my seatmates. We first played Deep Sea Adventure which was fun. We learned the ropes fairly quickly but died getting the treasure at the bottom. I got some of the treasures in the following rounds, but I ultimately placed last when we were done counting the points. We then played Ghost Blitz which was a memorization and kind of spot-the-difference game, which my brain sucks at. I got the least amount of cards, placing last again, which humbled me after last week's round of board games haha. Come late afternoon or so, I eventually get a message from my friend and I get some recommendations from them. We mostly talked as I was going out to Yabu to have dinner. I was mostly talking to my friend while we were eating and my friend mentioned this journalism competition before when I asked them if they have been to Taguig yet. She clarified what it was and I couldn't believe it. She had also competed in the RSSPC in 2014! I immediately showed them the blog post I had about it and the school photo I took and they recognized it. It was such a weird thing that they also went there and I spent the majority of the night in disbelief, but also in shock because wtf. I honestly couldn't believe that anyone would still care or remember that event, even though it meant a lot to me at the time. For the evening, I mostly just spent it staying in the office and overtiming as I wait for my sister to be free. She was around the area and we planned to go home together. I eventually met up with my sister and we took a ride home. I was talking to my friend at this time and were just talking about a few things as I eventually got home. She then sends me a picture they took of the school when they was at the event! We both weren't sure if it was the school, but I looked it up online and correlated it to my photo as well. The teal-colored parts confirmed it and I told them that it was the school. That's so crazy haha. I don't know if it's fate or what but I'm just glad to have met someone who knows that event and actually went there. I admit to them that I've been looking for people who joined that event because I felt like I was looking for someone, but, wow, I was really happy to have met them. It was kind of funny that we wouldn't have much to talk about if we met at that time anyway. What a weird, invisible string. I was in disbelief the rest of the night.

Song of the day: Stickwitu by The Pussycat Dolls

Star-Aligned!

Wed, 28 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I woke up feeling really, really sleepy today. For some reason, I couldn't sleep well last night but I didn't start my day groggy. I woke up to a few messages from that artist and we actually talked for a bit in the morning. I woke up early, but I felt like I had **A LOT** of time in the morning. I mostly spent it talking with that artist and they told me a few things about astrology. I learned that I was a "Cancer Rising" and my Sun, Moon, Mercury, and Neptune were in Capricorn. I also found out my actual birth time (after my mom pointed out that it was on my birth certificate all along, and I just didn't read it) and I showed my full birth chart to them! They also told me that we got along really well because my first house was in Cancer, the same as theirs. We got along really well and kept talking for most of the morning. I still had work and I was able to accomplish my morning routine, so that was that. We kept talking and then took a break during lunch time because they had to cook, I mostly just focused on getting food for lunch. My sister and I had Mang Inasal, but I just had rice from Mang Inasal, and I just reheated some of my food from yesterday. For the afternoon, I didn't do much aside from just finish my work and talk to some coworkers. After I timed out for the evening, I talked to that artist again and they actually started our conversation by asking how we should go by calling each other. I've always been wondering what to call them and I've been meaning to ask them that, but I'm glad that they were aware of it too. We talked throughout the night again today, which was a really nice way to spend my evening. I was shocked because my evening passed by so fast. I remember timing out for work like it was a few minutes ago. She told me something, which was super interesting because I noticed it on my side as well, but it was nice to know that they're aware of it as well. After that, I worked on my last few journal entries, published them, and slept for the night.

Song of the day: The Other Side Of The Door (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Wait there in the pourin' rain, come back for more
And don't you leave, 'cause I know
All I need is on the other side of the door

Journal entry for Tuesday, May 27th, 2025

Tue, 27 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty boring, nothing much went on and my usual work just passed by. I did have a weird dream about this crush I had back in elementary school, which was odd because I haven't thought of them in forever. For the evening, I didn't do much than just complete my exercise routine for today and have dinner. My dinner was just take-out from Buffalo's Wings N' Things. I did eat some Korean food like that Pepero and Cledor ice cream and watched through Korean TV today, so that was nice. I also got commended for my work, which was really nice to hear. I also remembered White Horse out of the blue and it made me a bit sad, but I just felt like singing that song. While the night was boring and a bit lonely, I overall enjoyed my day.

Song of the day: White Horse (Stolen Version) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I had so many dreams about you and me
Happy endings, now I know

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse
To come around

K-Day!

Mon, 26 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Monday started off like a boring, usual day. I did get a nice letter on Slowly, so that started off well. I also made a plan to exercise today, so I looked forward to doing it today. I got started with work and things were progressing well, as things usually were. On my break, I tried to see if I can stream some Philippine TV because I was bored and had nothing better to do anyway. But then it hit me: if I can stream Philippine TV, that means I can stream other countries' TV! So I searched online to find a website that streams real TV from Korea, I reactivated my Daum/Kakao account, and I streamed some Korean TV! I couldn't believe it, but I accidentally stumbled upon a show on JBTC that had **SEVENTEEN**! Seriously, SEVENTEEN! I saw Hoshi and Woozi on this cooking show and I immediately had to post an IG Story about it and let Cheska know. I also talked to Max about it and she responds, and we have a short exchange about what the show was and then SVT in general. I just keep watching it in the background while I do my work and it was seriously cool. I saw some Korean ads as well and I just had a bright idea, why don I try to do another [Korean Snackathon](https://blog.dartegnian.com/a-korean-snackathon/) thing again? I thought about it for a while, but eventually ordered some Korean snacks as well. I waited for my order to arrive, which took a while and I was mostly scared because the ice cream might melt, but it eventually arrived and the Samanco green tea fish ice cream snack was the first one I tried. It was good, I can admit that I appreciate the taste now that my palate is more familiar with matcha. I ate it while watching some Korean ads and I had to switch to another channel for ads. I then ate the snowy almond Pepero one, which was good as well, although some of the nuts got stuck in my teeth, which wasn't a pleasant experience. The afternoon went on as I just did my work. I got bored so I ended up cooking that cup of Buldak cheese and it was really, really good. The thing was, I expected it to be hot so I already came prepared with milk from the fridge **AND IT WAS HOT**. It was just the cup noodle version, but damn, it was hotter than I expected and I felt like dying from it. I was still able to finish the cup noodles, though, and it was really nice to have Buldak once again. I eventually finished my work and just had the rest of the day free. I was then able to check Seventeen's album release and I saw a few IG Stories from my friends about it. I also got to talk to Cheska about the show I watched earlier, which was nice. In the late evening, the artist that I commissioned talked to me and they had an update regarding the artwork. It looked super detailed compared from when they sent their first few sketches, and they told me that they also took a look at my site and found out that I write. I asked them about their college experience and we had a really interesting conversation after that. I learned so much about them, which was kind of endearing since I haven't heard a new person open up to me this much in a long time. I've also been feeling a little lonely lately, with me not having to talk to anyone on my wavelength for a while now, and it feels nice to talk to a person that gets me. We kept talking, even extending up until 2 a.m. the following day. Which kind of was a new record and an exception, considering what I posted yesterday. But I just loved talking to them. This day was super fun and talking to a new person who's on my same wavelength was what wrapped it well.

Journal entry for Sunday, May 25th, 2025

Sun, 25 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I spent the majority of Sunday just doing nothing. Really, nothing much until I suddenly felt the need to write something in the evening and I finished writing that new blog post about me feeling stuck in a loop!

Song of the day: Video Killed The Radio Star by The Buggles

Send Lithium-Ions to the Rain!

Sat, 24 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday was just a boring, chill day at home. I mostly was just browsing social media when I saw an IG Reel of a fire in Parañaque and I let one of my friends know about it. I also noticed how close it was to *someone's* house. I have a lot of old Nokia devices, especially Windows Phones, and other Li-ion devices at home. I got really paranoid that they would suddenly blow up and cause a huge fire. So I gathered them all up come early evening and I would throw them away at the gadget recycling bin at SM Aura. It's fine, I needed an excuse to go out anyway. I turned on one of my old Windows Phones and it's kinda sad to let go of my yellow Nokia Lumia 1020. My old self would've loved to have this phone way back in high school. This was one of my dream phones, and here I am throwing it away. I'm also throwing away Ailysh's old PS Vita that I couldn't fix no matter what, even replacing the board didn't fix the stick drift. It was the most heartbreaking to reset my Lumia 1020 because the Windows Phone Store doesn't exist anymore, but whatever, who cares. I just posted IG Stories of it and some devices I'll throw away, as well as an old photo of all my phones back then. They all got a lot of likes, which was nice to see, for a change. I went to SM Aura and sadly dumped all of the electronics into the bin for e-waste recycling. I then decided on where to get dinner next. I thought about 8cuts, and I actually waited outside their restaurant for a good while before walking away. A server didn't acknowledge me or even welcome me in, so I just lost interest. I kept walking until I decided on having Chili's tonight. I really wanted a burger, though, so I was going to order the burger that I didn't eat fresh last time. When I got to Chili's, I got a seat at the bar table and I ordered my fish and chips, as well as my burger. I had a lot of fries on my plate. I also ordered some alcoholic drink, but it wasn't that alcoholic at all. It had me worry because I have gout and it's going to fuck up my sleep later, but thankfully it wasn't that alcoholic. I eventually finished my food and ordered the rest for take-out. I was surprised that the bill was around 1,700 Pesos, even though I just ordered 2 "side" dishes and I was just alone. Regardless, I booked a ride home and the guy kept chatting to me about restaurants on the way home. This started because I set my pickup pin at Wolfgang's Steakhouse and he got the notion of a Jollibee nearby. I eventually arrived home and called it a productive-enough day.

Song of the day: Set Fire to the Rain by Adele

Lyrics that resonated with me:
But I set fire to the rain
Watched it pour as I touched your face

Holy Shit, I Could've Actually Died Today! No, Really! What the Fuck?!

Fri, 23 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today started with me still on my adventure from last night. I got home safe, though, which was really nice and I ate some good beef tapa before going home and sleeping. I had a few hours of rest, though, but I was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed come morning. I booked a ride to the office and went on my way. I got to the building and, as I was walking past a pedestrian lane, I heard a bus coming even though I wanted to take a step further. **AND THEN A BUS PASSED BY ME**. I heard the bus' horn so I stopped, but I felt so inclined to take a step further, **WHICH WOULD'VE EITHER KILLED ME OR HIT ME REALLY HARD**. Jesus Christ. I legitimately had a near-death experience. There was a guy watching for the buses and for pedestrians crossing, but he wasn't paying attention and I legitimately could've been killed. My smile and upbeat mood was immediately killed and I went to my desk thinking about how close I was to dying. The rest of the day wasn't that noteworthy, though. I still had a good day at work, like eating at the common area and ordering Taco Bell just to try for something different. My mood eventually turned okay and my shock from this morning waned, so that's good, at least. I went and commissioned an artist to redraw my OC in their style. I went home in the evening and nothing much happened by the end of the day, though, but today was still good enough for me. I'm just glad I didn't die or something.

Song of the day: Apple by Charli xcx

Crazy Win

Thu, 22 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today shaped up to be a normal day in my life, but apparently life had more things in store for me. My day started with me having trouble sleeping and then eventually falling asleep at around 3 a.m. again. Way, way off my scheduled bedtime of 10 p.m. I was able to fall asleep eventually though. My morning was your usual morning. I woke up okay, I ate some breakfast, but I was mostly in a hurry to leave for the office. I was able to get an Angkas ride relatively quickly, but the thing is, the driver was way far away in BGC. He was around Venice Grand Canal, I believe. It took him 20 minutes to get to my house which caused a major delay. He was awfully chatty as well and wasted some time taking a wrong path. But I eventually arrived in the office okay. Work was fine as usual and I got really productive today finishing my tasks and logging my work. It was nice to catch up and clear a lot of things on my board for today. So much so, I had a lot of free time by the late afternoon or so. I also had coffee with some of the team I'm sitting next to, or at least I was invited to coffee with them. I told them that I don't really get coffee because I'm acidic and they joked that I shouldn't get it anyway because I'm jumpy and easily scared, which we laughed about it. I eventually got my matcha and it was really nice. It sucks that my matcha drink wasn't more. At the same time, I was talking to the Baguettes and I shared that IG Reel of the matcha mochi I wanted to try at SM Megamall. Max also said that she wanted to try that, too, and Meryll wanted to try it as well after seeing the Reel. Matcha aside, I was able to go back to work and have lunch out with the team sometime later. Lunch was nothing noteworthy, I just had squid on a sizzling plate which was really nice. The others were shocked that my plate wasn't that expensive, but I told them I just bought a Google Pixel recently that's why my money's short. After that, we went back to the office to work. By the afternoon, I had some time to kill and 2 of them invited me to play this board game one of them brought called Vale of Eternity. I'm a total sucker for board games. I LOVE board games! I swear. The last board game I played was Avalon during the Dice outing last year, so I could use some fun. I've never heard of Vale of Eternity, though, it's my first time seeing it. But the guy who owned the game did a good job at explaining it and somehow my brain just understood all of that quickly. As we got to playing, it reminded me of a game I used to play, and it definitely was like Yu-Gi-Oh! It really is so similar with the monsters, tributes, summons, phases, spells, field effects, card effects, etc. (I only know Yu-Gi-Oh, not Pokémon TCG). I also told the guys that it reminded me of Yu-Gi-Oh and I grew up playing it. All of the sudden, the gears in my head that loved playing Yu-Gi-Oh on the PSP turned again and I immediately **WON** the first round of us playing. This game was just introduced to me and yet I won already! Sure, yeah, “beginner's luck” and I lost the next round. But I still had those cogs turning and I won the next 2 consecutive rounds! We played 4 rounds in total, and I won 3 of them, even though they weren't going easy on me anymore. One of the other guys really believed my story in that I genuinely was a Yu-Gi-Oh addict back then. 3/4 wins, not bad for a beginner. After those quick games, we went back to our desks and I did some wrapping up on my tasks for the day before logging off. I booked a ride home relatively early. I wasn't planning on doing anything by the late evening, but something just came up that I had to do and, for what it was worth, it was really, really fun. I'm glad I went on that trip, even though it was a bit scary.

Song of the day: Pursuit Of Happiness - Extended Steve Aoki Remix by Kid Cudi, Steve Aoki

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'm on the pursuit of happiness and I know
Everything that shine ain't always gonna be gold, hey
I'll be fine once I get it, yeah, I'll be good

Journal entry for Wednesday, May 21st, 2025

Wed, 21 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Journal entry for Tuesday, May 20th, 2025

Tue, 20 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today started with me feeling bored so I did some programming since I had nothing better to do anyway. I also just browsed the web and just made sure I'm up to date on all the house bills and other types of ongoing bills that I had. I couldn't sleep much but I eventually slept on my own. I had this weird dream that I met someone again and we were in this weird trip or something. Waking up to it definitely weirded me out because I didn't expect to still have dreams about them. Regardless, I got my morning started and I ate some of the breakfast that my sister prepared. I didn't eat much of the toast since it was mostly burned. I tried making matcha but the first pack of powdered milk that I opened was just **FULL OF FIRE ANTS** which made me just throw away the contents of the mug, which was a shame because I had put a lot of matcha powder into it already. I just cleaned the mug and made myself another glass of matcha (this time with no ants). Work went and passed by uneventfully. I also went downstairs and installed Microsoft Office and logged in the family's Netflix account on my cousin's new laptop, and I showed them my new Pixel phone since they've never seen a Google Pixel in person before, even though their company sells it. In the evening or so, I did watch 1 episode of House M.D. after watching an IG Reel, but I didn't continue watching and instead did random things to pass the evening. We also got take-out for today's dinner, which was Burger King, and my sister and I talked briefly about how different our life is now and also because she thought about me while she was on the jeep. I also ordered groceries and restocked the fridge, which was nice.

Song of the day: Sleeping On My Dreams by Jacob Collier

Journal entry for Monday, May 19th, 2025

Mon, 19 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today, I mostly did work, played music, and got off work just fine. Around the early afternoon, I was watching season 5 of Black Mirror on Netflix because my sister has been asking me to watch it. I made popcorn by taking one of the popcorn bags I've been saving and decided that it was a good day to use it. And wow, it really didn't disappoint. The popcorn was cheesy and super tasty, way better than the regular popcorn I get at Venice Grand Canal Mall. I watched the first episode of season 5 and it got me hooked. I spent around 4 hours or so just watching 4 episodes of it throughout the night, which was a fun enough way to pass my time.

Song of the day: Bubble by STAYC

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Let me go let me say
이제 그만 hate or hate
Hello hello punch you like a 808
나는 나 너는 너
전혀 문제없는걸
다른 것과 틀린 건 달라

동그라미 원하지
미래는 그 누구도 몰라 Nobody knows
어쩌지 I can't be
어디로 튈지 몰라
Stupid stop
잔소린 Bubble Bubble Bubble

Journal entry for Sunday, May 18th, 2025

Sun, 18 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I started Sunday with me talking to Naomi about the event, about some of my friends, and a bunch of other things. I also talked to John who decided that we should see each other soon and I told him that I'm down to visit some upcoming gigs. He tells me that he'll send some posters. I also replied to Belle's messages and I went to sleep after that. I had some trouble sleeping, though, because the Buldak messed up my stomach and I woke up from it. But I was able to sleep afterward. For the morning, nothing much happened and my sister and I just ordered take-out. She tells me that she's going out later in the afternoon so she could get the flu shot and that she'll be going with her boyfriend's family. I decided on whether or not I'll get the flu vaccine. I eventually decided on just getting it because I didn't want to miss work for the next few months. So I just waited at home with my sister and we had take-out. Funny enough, the food I ordered didn't arrive so I filed a dispute, only for the restaurant to recognize their mistake and send me the missing order sometime later. But by then, my money had already been refunded, so it was still nice to get it, even though I didn't get to eat it and had put it in the fridge since we had to leave by 3 p.m. We eventually had to leave the house and we quickly got to my sister's boyfriend's house. By then, they were already in the car waiting for us. I sat at the front passenger seat while their dad was driving, but I didn't talk much for the whole trip to UP Town Center in QC. It's interesting because it's been a while since I've been there. The last time I went here was to buy that Amazon Kindle, which I then gave to *someone*. And the last recallable time before that was to meet up with Kai, and I remember that being a fun day because she gave me the signature perfume I often wear now. While we were in the car, my sister was talking to her boyfriend's family and she finds out that they're giving away Pokémon cards in every Happy Meal, so she was sure to order some Happy Meals for us after we get our flu shots. We eventually got there and visit the doctor that would be giving the flu shots. It's funny because she actually left 1 flu shot behind, only having 3 on hand, and there were 4 of us. My sister's boyfriend was the one who actually had to sit out of the flu vaccine because he insisted I go first before him to get the flu shot, which was just funny as hell and I had to hold my laughter in. They even teased him for not being able to get the shot, but all in all, it was okay. We ordered Dairy Queen after that and I paid for a large minty Oreo one, and we headed to McDonald's. My sister orders Happy Meals for all of us, but her boyfriend's family only wanted burgers, so it was only my sister and I who got chicken and rice meals. I talked to the family while we were ordering and I asked why did my sister's boyfriend resign from his job and I told them that it is still possible to make it in the IT field without an IT-related diploma. I also gave him some advice that he should pursue an active developer role instead of an IT support role that I think will make him stagnate instead of getting his foot in the door. But he told me he'll just see. My sister also opens a single card pack from the Happy Meal set that she ordered. We then went back to the car after eating for a while at McDonald's. I don't recall much of what happened on the ride back as I apparently slept. I still remember that the sun was still out while we were on the road and, when I woke up, it was already nighttime. But we eventually arrive back to their house and my sister and I wait for a bit before our uncle picked us up to take us home. My remaining time for the day was pretty productive, I fixed a few bugs and worked on this feature for my website. The mood calendar modal now changes according to the color for that mood. It took some tinkering, but I eventually made it work. I also added in the weather temperature in the information block, so that's nice. All in all, today was a productive day and I got to go out without the added stress of bringing my phone around or having the trip being a hassle.

Song of the day: Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Something's happening
Happening to me
My friends say I'm acting peculiarly
Come on, baby
We better make a start
You better make it soon
Before you break my heart

Oh, I
I want to be with you everywhere
Oh, I
I want to be with you everywhere
(Wanna be with you everywhere)

minsan fest

Sat, 17 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good
Significant Location: QC Memorial Circle

Today was the day I'd go to Minsan Fest in Quezon City! But since the concert would be in the afternoon, I did some programming for my websites and I **FINALLY** migrated the mood calendar modal to the standalone journal sample component. It's been annoying me for almost a year that I worked on journal pages while just duplicating the code I had for the modal. It was super tough to migrate some code that was only in the mood calendar into the component, but I'm glad I actually did it. I'm also glad that I'm clever enough to make the transition seamless by making the *journal-entry* component itself easily work as a child component. I also ported over the weather and mood status information blocks to the standalone component. I'm just glad I don't have to deal with separate codebases for the journal entry anymore. I was able to clean up some code, too. After that, I just caught up with my mood calendar entries for the week, which seemed a lot despite it only being for 2 days. I then went and prepared to leave for the event. It was a long trip to QC but the weird thing was that I was dropped off **at the wrong place**. I was dropped in a random village far from QC Memorial Circle. It was so weird! The pin was correct, too, so some asshole got the location pin wrong and led me astray. It was kind of scary, too, since random people were looking at me and I didn't want my iPhone 16 Pro Max snatched from me. I was able to find an ATM nearby, thankfully, because I didn't have any money and I figured that Gcash wouldn't work well there. I thankfully managed to book a ride to the correct landmark and got there safely. After arriving, I mostly just waited in line to get my wristband-thing for the event and took pictures of Zild as he was singing. I didn't know him much so I went to some nearby food stalls to buy some food since I haven't had breakfast yet. What's also weird is that my signal is absolutely shot, even though it worked just fine earlier when I was in line. I couldn't upload my IG Story at all, and I even access a website. Somehow, Naomi was able to call me and I was able to tell her where I was standing and she eventually met me while I was drinking iced tea. She was with her uncle/cousin who was around the same age as her which confused me at first, but after he eventually cleared things up, I understood how it worked. I tagged along with them throughout the rest of the event. We mainly watched some singers while standing and we walked around in-between breaks. I treated them to iced tea, which was funny because it got up to 210 Pesos for 3 70-Peso iced teas. I was just shocked at how overpriced some of these items were. I also asked Naomi how she was getting along with my old Xiaomi phone and I was surprised to see that she was using the 3-button navigation style on Android when I had been using gesture-based before. I also taught her how to use a fingerprint to unlock the device, which was how I used to open the phone before. After a while, we sat down and listened to a few artists, mainly Sud and a few others. Naomi and I also talked about what her plans for college were and other things. By nighttime, I asked Naomi if we could visit the other stalls on the **left** side of QC Memorial Circle. I was surprised to see that it opened up to a whole row of food vendors. I wanted to get some food and Naomi was checking out the first stall we saw. She wanted to buy something from there but her uncle/cousin told her that they didn't have enough money to buy food with, and I just felt like I had to treat them both since they were out of funds already. I just got *chicken katsu* for us 3 and it was okay, the rice was a bit cold so I couldn't finish it. I ate with them for a bit before wandering around for a bit more to buy other food and withdraw some cash. I walked alone for a bit until I got to a row of *sari-sari* stores and it seemed odd to me because they didn't seem like they were set up today. The people and sellers here seemed to have children here. So I guess that they live here? In Quezon City Memorial Circle?? It was so strange because I've passed around this roundabout many times and I never even figured that people could even live here. It was just so strange. But thankfully, a lady here was able to cash out some Gcash money I had and I got 1,200 Pesos or so, which I figured I would need in case of other stuff. I then walked back to Naomi and her uncle/cousin and I passed by a stall on the way. I ordered some Buldak that I haven't had in a long time and some blue lemonade to go along with it. It was way spicier than I remember. I know that I have some mood calendar entries here where I would eat Buldak for days, but I **never figured it would be this hot**. I downed the blue lemonade easily and went back with Naomi to have her tumbler refilled and so I could buy more blue lemonade. As we were walking back, Naomi tells me that she had some questions for me, but she couldn't remember what most of it was since it was on her stolen phone. The only question she could remember was this game development-related question and why I haven't developed any games. I just told her that not everyone skilled in programming can do game development and it's neither a talent nor skill of mine. I was able to finish some of the Buldak noodles and I told her to try and ask me more questions. I made a joke how I'm like on Hot Ones (the show where contestants eat spicy food and answer tough questions), but she couldn't remember so I just ended up downing the entire remainder of my blue lemonade and asking Naomi to refill my cup with water. We went back to have her tumbler refilled (again) and I was able to finish and toss out the Buldak noodles. After that, we went back to the concert to watch the remaining songs of Reese Lansangan's performance. I asked them what time or after which artist they would then go home. I just decided to going home at the same time as them. After Reese Lansangan, Itchyworms played next and I took a lot of videos and photos of them. I also sang along to the songs I knew, mainly "Ang Gusto Ko Lamang Sa Buhay" and "Beer." I also noticed that my phone's battery was getting low, which was super strange because I don't remember actively using it that much, save for a few instances. It made me worry about my phone's battery health considering that this is the latest top-of-the-line device and I'm the first owner. It made me wonder if my battery was shot, but I mostly blamed it on charging up to 85% in the afternoon before leaving. Naomi then tells me that they would leave after Ebe Dancel's set and I stayed with them and enjoyed Ebe Dancel's set as he performed some hits. I actually didn't know the guy, but he sang some classic OPM songs that I knew. After Ebe Dancel ended his performance and as Naomi and her uncle/cousin were waiting for Mayonnaise next, I excused myself to buy some water. Apparently, they were staying and that they'd listen to Mayonnaise next, which had me worry because my phone's battery was now 20%. I was actually really worried now because I didn't want to take public transportation home and have my phone snatched there, or take several hours just to get home. I tried to find a charging station and I asked a food vendor if there was a charging station nearby, and she said that there were none. I went to the rows of *sari-sari* stores next and they were mostly closed, including the store that had Gcash, too. I just decided that I should go home immediately and that I should take a Grab if worse comes to worst. Thankfully, I was able to book a Joyride home and the driver was able to see me. I hopped on and it was a long trip home, but it took only 30-40 minutes or so. I got home and I was finally glad to charge my phone. I was extremely tired but I was able to finish uploading all of my IG Stories and I caught up with some people. I even found out that John attended the event, but we didn't see each other. I talked to Naomi later in the evening and, despite the battery issue I had, it was honestly pretty good.

Song of the day: Beer by Itchyworms

Pixel Mine!

Fri, 16 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I didn't really plan much today, honestly. Today was supposed to be just a normal day in the office and, for the most part, it did turn out that way. Nothing else was noteworthy in the morning aside from the Angkas rider being too talkative and it wasn't a good time or place for me to talk, but I eventually got to the office just fine. We had late lunch out, but it was good since we went to Marugame Udon and I ordered a lot of sides. My coworkers even teased me for it because I always expensive food for lunch. I had to hurry back for my meeting at 1 p.m., though, so I wasn't able to finish my entire curry. I just had it for take-out and rushed back, and bid farewell to my coworkers. I attended my meeting just fine and things were all well and good. I completed my tasks for the day after that and just chilled around the office for the remaining period. During my free time, I went outside to SM Makati to finally buy a Google Pixel 9. I've been wanting to buy a Google Pixel for the Material Design 3/Material You and to generally use it as an inspiration, because my current website's design language is Material Design 3. I bought it solely because of that and it was a hassle buying it. I was also underwhelmed by the fact that it's expensive but only has 128 GB of storage. I had to withdraw around 39,000 in cash and it seriously made me feel a little ill and nauseous withdrawing that much money, even though 100% of my money will be going to me. I still felt massively guilty for it. But regardless, I was able to buy the phone at GameXtreme and they were able to give me a freebie for it. While setting up the phone, the guy was so impressed by my Samsung pocket Wi-Fi and they say that they've never even seen a pocket Wi-Fi with a full touchscreen, like on a phone. I told them that they could buy it and that it's 5G, and they were seriously impressed. But after that, I got a clear case and screen protector for the phone, and the lady selling was also impressed because it's her first time seeing a Google Pixel, and that it looks so expensive. After that whole ordeal, I didn't do much aside from setting up my phone and booking a ride home. I also ordered Taylor Swift's Lover album, which initially seemed sketchy because it's from FB Marketplace, but I still had put my faith in it because I only paid for the shipping fee thus far. When I got home, I prepared my Xiaomi device from 2023 to be shipped off to Naomi because I promised her that I'd give her that phone when I got a Pixel. Personally, I didn't like it that much anyway and it had a tie to *someone* because she won that phone as a raffle prize during our 2023 Dice Christmas party. I'm still glad that I'm giving Naomi a modern Android phone that's actually Android 15, the latest version at this time. I also got that Lover album booked and handling both deliveries were a pain to deal with, especially with the Lover album because the rider is too scared to get scammed and initially didn't ship the item. Despite that looming anxiety for having both packages stolen, I'm actually glad that both items were delivered as they are and Naomi enjoyed her new phone. I was mostly thankful and glad that I have a Google Pixel now and it's so comfortable to hold in the hand compared to my iPhone 16 Pro Max. I loved using the Google Pixel and I eventually received the Lover album, I even paid 100 Pesos to the driver as a tip. I got to post Lover to my IG Story and even told Ane about it, which was nice. All in all, today was a really good day and I'm glad I got a brand new phone again.

Song of the day: Irreplaceable by Beyoncé

Lyrics that resonated with me:
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter of fact, he'll be here in a minute, baby
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinking
You're irreplaceable

Journal entry for Thursday, May 15th, 2025

Thu, 15 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

It was a pretty fun and chill day in the office today. In the morning, the driver took a route through BGC to get to Makati, completely avoiding the whole SLEX and C6 route and it was way faster. I also got some butterflies in my stomach for seeing my 3rd place, BGC, but never actually going there. For the rest of the day, nothing much happened aside from me doing the usual work. I had lunch out with my teammates and I ordered Pepper Lunch and they asked me how much my lunch was, and I said that it was around 700 Pesos. It kind of made them laugh because they pointed out that I always buy expensive food for lunch, usually my order being 500 Pesos and above. But yeah, it's funny because I noticed that too. The team lead was also talking about buying an iPhone before the tariffs hit and I asked them which model and they said the iPhone 16 Pro Max, which made me whip out my own iPhone 16 Pro Max and I had to flex that phone out again. But overall, lunch was fun and I got to talk to them about other stuff like the Thunderbolts* (2025) and other pop culture. After that, we went back to the office and I continued my work. After I had accomplished a bulk of my tasks, I had some downtime and a coworker invited me to have lunch out with him. We talked for a bit about the problems he's facing and why most people don't want to return the money he lends to people. After that, we walked around because he wanted to buy some pop-figurine-things. I eventually decided on buying this Cinnamoroll pop figure and we both went back to the office break room to open what we got. Apparently, I got a rare Cinnamoroll one and I was glad to have gotten that. It was a hassle to assemble and I didn't want it breaking on me on the way home so I just placed it in the box and planned to assemble it later at my house. Work continued fine and nothing much went on after that aside from me completing my usual round of tasks and going home. For the evening, I didn't do anything much aside from assembling that Cinnamoroll figure and then going to sleep.

Song of the day: Someday We'll Know by Mandy Moore, Jonathan Foreman

Journal entry for Wednesday, May 14th, 2025

Wed, 14 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty boring and average. Work was okay and I was productive today, thankfully, I was able to keep up on a lot of my current tasks, so that's good. Aside from that, I didn't do much in the evening but play Pokémon Alpha Sapphire. I was able to catch Uxie and then finally Dialga. I feel like I ate a lot today, jeez. Even at night, my sister treated me to those matcha McFlurry at McDonald's, which was nice and I bought take-out and groceries as well today. It's just sad that I spilled an entire serving of *palabok* earlier as I was taking it out of the microwave. But I was still able to eat *palabok* by re-ordering it, so it all turned out well in the end.

Song of the day: Changes by Butterfly Boucher, David Bowie

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I still don't know what I was looking for
And my time was running wild
A million dead-end streets
Every time I thought I'd got it made
It seemed the taste was not so sweet
So I turned myself to face me
But I've never caught a glimpse
Of how the others must see the faker
I'm much too fast to take that test

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the stranger)
Ch-ch-Changes
Don't want to be a richer one
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the stranger)
Ch-ch-Changes
Just gonna have to be a different one
Time may change me
But I can't trace time

Journal entry for Tuesday, May 13th, 2025

Tue, 13 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today felt so tiring, mostly because I had to re-finish the story again of my Pokémon Alpha Sapphire playthrough. I couldn't rest without completing the full story again and the Hoenn Elite Four was as hard to deal with this time, I swear. But after persevering, I was able to beat all of them and earn a spot at the Hall of Fame without any cheats or hacks. I went to sleep after that and my normal day continued. Nothing else noteworthy went on for today and the evening aside from me completing the Delta Episode, too. And since I beat the Elite Four, I was able to get the Mega Stone for my Gardevoir, which was my main Pokémon for this playthrough and in my previous Pokémon Emerald playthrough when I was a teen. It was really nice to get into Pokémon again and I used the spare time to legitimately catch a few legendaries before ending the night.

Song of the day: Lover by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?
With every guitar string scar on my hand
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover
My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue
All's well that ends well to end up with you
Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover

And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me
And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover

Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever)
You're my, my, my, my
Oh, you're my, my, my, my
Darling, you're my, my, my, my
Lover

Journal entry for Monday, May 12th, 2025

Mon, 12 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was a holiday so I'm glad I just got to rest and relax for today. I didn't really do anything big aside from just playing Pokémon Alpha Sapphire and continuing it. I really wanted to get the main story done today and beat the Hoenn Elite Four. I also learned that I could just cheat my playthrough and spent the early evening just cheating the stats of my Pokémon and catching Pokémon I wouldn't normally have anyway. I was able to make it to the Elite Four and absolutely destroyed most of them, but I had a bit of a hard time at Steven's part but I was able to finish the story. At the end, though, I felt guilty that I had just cheated and, even though I didn't use massively-overpowered team of legendaries, I didn't feel like my win was earned. So I restored my save file to before I had cheated and then continued the playthrough normally.

Song of the day: The Actor by Michael Learns To Rock

Journal entry for Sunday, May 11th, 2025

Sun, 11 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday started with me staying up and playing that game I found. It was a lot of reading and a lot of dialogue, but I got invested in the story enough. It kind of fell apart at a twist in it and it was already 6 a.m. by then. I ended up fast-forwarding the story and skipping some parts just so I could go to sleep. In hindsight, the story was enjoyable, but it wasn't worth it for me to wreck my already-broken sleep schedule because of it. I slept at irregular times and my Apple Watch recorded only about 5 hours of sleep. My sister and I also ordered some take-out for food and I ate for a bit, watched some Nman, browsed some videos online, and ended up sleeping in the late afternoon to early evening. I felt really hammered and it honestly feels like I wasted my Sunday, but I decided to just fix a few bugs for my website and finally catch up with my mood calendar entries, which I was able to do, thankfully.

Song of the day: Man in the Mirror - 2012 Remaster by Michael Jackson

Journal entry for Saturday, May 10th, 2025

Sat, 10 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Saturday was pretty boring for me. I expected to go out and meet a new person but that didn't push through and they ended up ghosting me so it was just a boring day at home. I thought of coding or updating my mood calendar entries, but I didn't really feel like it so I just spent the day just bedrotting. I wanted to do something, at least, so I stayed up and looked for something else to do. Thankfully, I went on to continue some AWS certification training. I also fixed a major bug with my website's journal entries and screenshots, which was all due to some logical bug that I fixed on my own. The night continued from there as I played that game.

Song of the day: Man in the Mirror - 2012 Remaster by Michael Jackson

Journal entry for Friday, May 9th, 2025

Fri, 09 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Friday started with me staying up to see the new Pope reveal themselves. I mostly just talked to Mom during this time as she wasn't informed that there was a new Pope already. She thanked me for updating her, which was nice. But today was pretty fun in that everything was pretty chill and I just focused on work as a long weekend was ahead. I went to work and it was a usual, fun workday for me. The team near me invited me out for lunch again and we had lunch at this Japanese restaurant nearby. I was actually running a bit late since my meeting was at 1 p.m. I immediately sprinted to my workplace and I got there relatively on time, but the meeting didn't continue, which was just hilariously funny. I still called in with my actual team and it went well. For the afternoon, I didn't eat much during lunchtime so I just went outside to find a restaurant which had some good food. I walked around and I found a Subway restaurant nearby! I immediately decided on getting Subway since I haven't had it in a long time, and I remember I used to have Subway regularly when I worked here in Makati in late 2019 to early 2020. I got Subway, which was nice. Work after that was nothing noteworthy. I just continued working and I thought I had something to do come evening, but I didn't and just ended up going home feeling bored but happy enough.

Song of the day: Club Can't Handle Me (feat. David Guetta) by Flo Rida

Journal entry for Thursday, May 8th, 2025

Thu, 08 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Thursday was pretty good, my sister packed me some food like some bacon and that spicy Spam that we had. I was in a hurry to get to work because it was so hard to book a ride and I was in a rush. I eventually got to work, but I freaking forgot to bring the case for my Galaxy Buds. It was only a matter of time before it lost power, which honestly sucks. Thankfully, I just left it at home due to the rush and I was able to confirm it after having my sister check my room for it. I'm glad it didn't fall out of my pocket while on the road or something. Work continued and went on as usual. The team near me invited me out for lunch and we ate at Glorietta. I ordered some Chinese food and I was glad to see that they had century egg. I actually wanted some congee as well, so I got that. And I got lemon chicken as well, for whatever reason. I also stopped by Pickup Coffee to buy some matcha, which was nice, but their matcha was a bit bitter for me, idk why. I actually ended up ordering so much food. I got congee, I got a century egg side dish, a lemon chicken with rice dish, *siopao*, and even some *buchi*. It was **A LOT** of food for me to eat alone and I just ended up eating the lemon chicken and century egg side dish. My coworkers actually laughed a bit for ordering too much, but I also laughed along with it because it was an absurd amount of food. I just ended up having the extra for take-out and ate the congee in the office. Nothing noteworthy went on after that and I just went home to relax and chill for the evening. I ended up being bored and staying up to watch the Vatican decide on the new Pope and for them to be revealed.

Song of the day: The Actor by Michael Learns To Rock

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'm not an actor, I'm not a star
And I don't even have my own car
But I'm hoping so much you'll stay
That you will love me anyway

Journal entry for Wednesday, May 7th, 2025

Wed, 07 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Wednesday started with me still being on Bondee and talking to the people there. It sucks because I matched with a really interesting person and she seems empathetic, but I didn't get their username and I couldn't find them anymore. It felt like a minor heartbreak, honestly, but I just went on using the app in hopes of seeing them, but to no avail. Morning had me busy with work, but I was really productive today, so I guess my energy expensed was worth it. Today was mostly boring and nothing noteworthy, but I got my room clean and washed all of the dishes even before 10 p.m., which is some personal achievement.

Song of the day: Love Is All That Matters by Eric Carmen

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Love is all that matters
Faithful and forever
Keepin' us together
Love is all we need
Prisoner of illusion
Sentence is suspended
Loneliness is ended
Love has set me free

We Have Matcha at Home

Tue, 06 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was finally the day my authentic matcha arrived! I'm actually now able to just make my own genuine matcha at home instead of ordering from outside stores. The only problem is that the *chasen* (whisk) I got from my matcha workshop **got mold**! It was moldy as hell. Thankfully, the other matcha utensils I got were relatively-okay, but damn, I need that *chasen*. I still made matcha regardless, even though it was honestly clumpy and not Instagram-worthy, which kinda sucks more than losing the *chasen* itself, haha. The matcha I made was good enough, though. Other than that, work passed by just fine. I was able to update a section on my blog post about someone and I added a screenshot of our Discord server when we were watching some analog horror from 4Plus. In the late evening, I was sleepless so I downloaded Bondee and wanted to check my account there. I tried out so many of the cool new features and I made some posts. It's kinda sad to see Town Hall there and someone in my chats, but whatever. I just toyed with the app and hung out there for a bit. I also tried Sky for a bit and playing it hurt my heart so much. I uninstalled it after a few minutes of playing.

Song of the day: Am I Wrong by Nico & Vinz

Journal entry for Monday, May 5th, 2025

Mon, 05 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I woke up with an Adele song stuck in my head. I don't know why I keep wanting to replay it but I just resonated so much with the hurt and pain in the song. I guess it's probably because I'm still hurt from my falling out with someone and, upon checking the lyrics, it does seem like a good song to describe that. Regardless, today was your usual workday. I believe I was relatively-productive today. In the evening, I mostly just fooled around with my friends on social media. I also talked to Naomi and we both set to hang out near the end of the month on May 17, so that's nice.

Song of the day: Easy On Me by Adele

Lyrics that resonated with me:
There ain't no gold in this river
That I've been washin' my hands in forever
I know there is hope in these waters
But I can't bring myself to swim
When I am drowning in this silence
Baby, let me in

Go easy on me, baby
I was still a child
Didn't get the chance to
Feel the world around me
I had no time to choose
What I chose to do
So go easy on me

Journal entry for Sunday, May 4th, 2025

Sun, 04 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today, it was just your normal, boring Sunday spent at home. I did want to try to fix a grayscale bug that happens when I play a song that has a black and white album art. I worked on it at night and eventually completed it come late evening.

Song of the day: ROXANNE by Arizona Zervas

Back to Hoenn!

Sat, 03 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday was mostly boring in that I didn't do much today other than spend it at home. It was thankfully a stress relief and I got some powdered matcha delivered today! It was nice to actually have this Japanese powdered matcha I used to have years ago and it's good to have things "pre-struggle" return once again. My sister also cooked some gizzard today and I finished the leftover take-out *sisig* from Mang Inasal. In the evening, I was bored. Really bored. I decided to just get into playing Pokémon again since I've just been watching and observing the content on YouTube for a couple of weeks now. I decided to go with something familiar that won't "culture shock" me so I didn't opt for anything new. I picked Alpha Sapphire since I loved playing the Hoenn games back in my PSP's GBA emulator and it was really fun to get back into it. I tried a 3DS emulator on my iPhone 16 Pro Max and, while it had a few hiccups at the start, I was eventually able to get it working. I played Alpha Sapphire for a few hours on my phone and then I transferred it to my PC where I played on Linux and used the DualSense controller I had. It was really fun and I ended up playing until 12 midnight and defeating Roxanne before trying to sleep.

Song of the day: ROXANNE by Arizona Zervas

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Roxanne, Roxanne
All she wanna do is party all night
Goddamn, Roxanne
Never gonna love me, but it's alright
She think I'm an asshole, she think I'm a player
She keep running back, though, only 'cause I pay up
Roxanne, Roxanne
All she wanna do is party all night

Met her at a party in the hills, yeah
She just wanna do it for the thrill, yeah
Shorty drive a poodle with no top (Top, top)
But if I throw this money, she gon' drop, ayy
She don't wait in lines if it's too long
She don't drive the whip unless the roof off
Only wanna call when the cash out
Only take the pic when her ass out

She from Malibu, uh, Malibu
If you ain't got a foreign, then she laugh at you, uh
Malibu, uh, Malibu
Spending daddy's money with a attitude

Roxanne (Roxanne), Roxanne (Roxanne)
All she wanna do is party all night
Goddamn (Goddamn), Roxanne (Roxanne)
Never gonna love me, but it's alright
She think I'm an asshole, she think I'm a player
She keep running back, though, only 'cause I pay up
Roxanne (Roxanne), Roxanne (Roxanne)
All she wanna do is party all night

Journal entry for Friday, May 2nd, 2025

Fri, 02 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

This Friday was generally stress-free. Work was really easy to get through and I was just coasting through my time at work for the entire day. I ordered take-out for my sister and I. We got matcha in the afternoon from Pickup Coffee. I also got groceries so that we had some food to cook over the weekend. After that, I just went to rest early.

Journal entry for Thursday, May 1st, 2025

Thu, 01 May 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Labor Day? More like Lazy Day. Nothing much happened today and I wish I had been more productive today, but I just spent it at home relaxing.

Journal entry for Wednesday, April 30th, 2025

Wed, 30 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

The end of April wasn't that exciting initially. I went to the office for some reason, even though I've already exceeded my quota for the month. It was just a quiet day in the office for me and I just finished whatever task I could before tomorrow's Labor Day holiday. I thought back and forth about watching or doing something in the evening. A coworker initially invited me out to dinner but had other stuff to do so we had to cancel that. I made up my mind on just watching Thunderbolts* (2025) after my shift. After my shift ended, I tried hard to get home quickly so I could attend an 8:20 p.m. showing at Venice Grand Canal. Unfortunately, I had to go home and the driver took an absurdly different and long way. I arrived at 8 p.m. which isn't enough time anyway. Thankfully, there's another showing at 9 p.m. and I immediately got ready for that. I got a ride to Venice Grand Canal and I had issues buying the ticket while on the road, but thankfully the payment went through and I got my ticket confirmed. I got to Venice safely and I asked the cashier lady to print out my ticket. I got some extra water and I went inside. I watched Thunderbolts* and it was pretty good, way better than what I had expected. I guess it lived up to the reviews. I especially liked the final end credits scene and looked forward to the Fantastic Four movie coming up. I didn't hang around for long but I enjoyed walking around before going home.

Journal entry for Tuesday, April 29th, 2025

Tue, 29 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Nothing much happened for today aside from it being a normal workday for me. I remembered an old song from South Border that I kept repeating in my head and it was nice to listen to again. The day progressed just fine and, after work, I'd meet up with my sister at BGC for our dinner at Italianni's. My sister would just be waiting for me there until my shift ended. I booked a ride there and had a small kerfuffle before meeting up with them, but I arrived relatively quickly and we had dinner. Things were easily resolved so we were able to have dinner without issue. Dinner was really nice. I had some good Italian spaghetti, which I haven't had in a while since my Mom last cooked. We had pizza and ribs as well, and they got other pasta dishes. Things after dinner weren't remarkable, we just went home and then put our take-out in the fridge for me to eat tomorrow. All in all, today was good.

Song of the day: Rainbow by South Border

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Take a little time, baby
See the butterflies' colors
Listen to the birds that were sent
To sing for me and you
Can you feel me?
This is such a wonderful place to be
Even if there is pain now
Everything would be all right
For as long as the world still turns
There will be night and day
Can you hear me?
There's a rainbow always after the rain

Photos from Yesterday

Mon, 28 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was your usual Monday for me, it was just about work and my usual routine. In the morning, my sister actually followed what I asked her of and she left me breakfast, which was nice. I was mostly bored and lonely throughout the entire day, but I eventually had an idea. I watched some K-Pop analysis videos about NewJeans and one talked about the aesthetics of the group and I just remembered how nice and surreal the Ditto MV felt. I was still hesitant to check it out since I don't like NewJeans anymore and Ditto left a sour taste in my mouth from that love pentagon thing, but I still gave it a watch and a listen again. I got really immersed by the atmosphere and the liminality of it. It felt like a memory that I had but couldn't fully remember. It made me dig through my own archive of photos from high school and I unearthed **A LOT** of photos. I sent them to various group chats like the RC and my batch friend group. I also sent a video to the IV - Lithium group chat. I selected a few photos that are nostalgia-inducing and also memorable enough to post on my IG. It was hard because I had a limit of 9 posts so I had to take down the Filling Station photos in favor of those Ditto-themed posts. But it was nice since I got a few friends comment and some IMCians like my photos. My batch friend group also had a lively discussion and I kept sending photos of Jaze, Foz, Loy throughout the day, which was funny. I fell asleep around the evening, which was weird because I'm usually not that sleepy at 7-8 p.m., but I took a small nap and I continued my night by browsing the Internet and trying to capture that liminal aesthetic. Overall, today was a good day. I got to connect with my own sense of nostalgia from my days at Integrated Montessori Center, a lot of people talked to me, and I even had a lot of people view my IG Story! It was 80+ people last time I checked. A new record, honestly.

Song of the day: Ditto by NewJeans

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I got no time to lose
내 길었던 하루, 난 보고 싶어
Ra-ta-ta-ta 울린 심장 (ra-ta-ta-ta)
I got nothing to lose
널 좋아한다고 ooh-whoa, ooh-whoa, ooh-whoa
Ra-ta-ta-ta 울린 심장 (ra-ta-ta-ta)
But I don't want to

Stay in the middle
Like you a little
Don't want no riddle
말해줘 say it back, oh, say it ditto
아침은 너무 멀어 so say it ditto

Classmates Reunite!

Sun, 27 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was really nice. Today was finally the day wherein I'd hang out with Justin, his girlfriend, Nate, and Ane at BGC together! I slept a little late at 12, but that's okay. I woke up and had breakfast with my sister and she made scrambled eggs. I had that wheat bread from yesterday's groceries and it was nice. I ate it while watching some courtoom analysis of what NewJeans is doing and how their legal battles are. After that, I just chilled around, made a few changes to my post from yesterday, and then had lunch. I asked my sister to cook the chicken I bought yesterday and it was really nice. We got that Spicy Mix spicy flavor and I ate it while watching a video about dumb things Pokémon trainers did. I laughed a lot because I could honestly relate to doing some of the dumb stuff there like not know what stats mean to a Pokémon, and only giving them STAB moves. I got a message from Justin saying that he was on the way and I got ready as well. Eventually, I arrived at our meetup place at Fully Booked in BGC. I only saw Justin and he told me that his girlfriend wasn't able to come along because she had other things to tend to, which I understand. But I'm glad that they're still together. Justin and I wait for a while, check out a few books, and just chill there while Nate and Ane buy Hogwarts Legacy for their Switch. They were still at Market! Market! but then went to Fully Booked shortly after. While browsing for books, Justin and I talked and I found a really funny book by Snopp Dogg titled, "Snoop Presents Goon with the Spoon." It made us laugh and I posted it to my IG Story. Eventually, Nathan and Ane arrive and they see us as they're coming up to the second floor. Nathan gives Justin a big hug which honestly shocks me. Apparently, they haven't seen each other since graduation so it feels nice to get them talking to each other again. They didn't waste any time talking to each other and Nate keeps talking to Pam. Ane was usually by herself during our time in Fully Booked but I caught up with her and talked with her a bit. We browsed some books for a while, I showed Nathan that goon book and also "Dick Fight Island 2," which Ane and I found funny. We browsed books for a little longer and Nate kept talking to Justin before I finally suggested that we go out to eat, mainly because Ane hasn't eaten since 10 a.m. in the morning. We left Fully Booked after that. We went to TGI Friday's because I haven't been there in a long time, also because the restaurant was one of the closest. Nathan brings out his Insta360 stick while we were walking and records us walking to TGI Friday's. We got seated and, thankfully, our table had a couch after I clarified with the waitress that it would only be the 4 of us. We got food and, like I promised, it was on me. My treat. Nate orders a porkchop, Ane gets chicken and mushroom, Justin gets a salmon bake, and I get six-spice grilled chicken and mushrooms on the side. Justin and Nate are so eager to talk to each other and I just watch them. I help Ane get Nate's Switch connected to the Wi-Fi I carried around so she could download Hogwarts Legacy. Nate keeps talking about his many adventures and travels and shows us pics from his travels. We eventually get our food and take photos (it was mainly Nathan taking photos), and we ate. We talked about a lot of stuff while we were eating, honestly. At one point while we were eating, Nate and Ane talk amongst themselves and Justin jokes to me saying that they should have that laugh track playing. I opened my phone to pull out some canned laughter on YouTube and it was seriously funny. Ane found it funny while Nathan was a bit confused, but it really made me and Justin laugh. Ane's download of Hogwarts Legacy eventually finishes and she plays while we were eating. I also make Justin ask how Nate and Ane met, I tell them the first time I met Ane, and then other topics followed. We then get dessert and I got the bill. Thankfully, it was within my budgeted range, *phew*. We walked out to check out the Timezone nearby, but that didn't seem fun enough so we went to the one in Market! Market! with the bowling alley. We got there after a bit of a walk and I ranted to Justin for a bit, but I'm glad he understood my position. We quickly got to Timezone and we play a few rounds of bowling. Actually, Justin, Ane, and only Nathan play because I didn't have money to reload in time for a 4th player, so I sat this one out. I'm kind of glad I did because Nathan was on a hot streak, scoring at least 4 strikes and so many spares, even at the end. I show them this NSFW bowling alley GIF I remember from a while ago and they laugh at it. The total score was 140 for Nate, 72 for Ane, and 112 for Justin. They all did pretty well, all things considered. We went on to try other games after. Nathan and Justin had fun at a few rounds of air hockey, then Nate and I played against each other in this Pong game. We hit up the "luck"/"skill"-based games until finally, we hit up the gambling games. Nathan and Ane settle at this Wizard of Oz one, the same type of game that got me hooked before, and they kept gambling. We mostly made jokes and I kept prodding Nathan to gamble more until my card fully ran out of load. After that, we walked around for a bit, stopping by this sports shop to check out some badminton rackets, before finally separating and heading our own ways. Nathan gives Justin a hug before leaving and I got one as well. I didn't book a ride for a while and headed to Serendra. I went back to High Street to think for a bit and just sit alone. I thought about life and how my life has been really lonely. It's funny because I sat at almost the exact same spot, thinking the same thing, back in 2017 and it's 2025 now with no major changes. I just booked a ride home so I could complete my journal entries. I sent Nate and Justin their pics and talked a bit with Justin before just shutting off my phone to complete my journal entries on the PC.

Journal entry for Saturday, April 26th, 2025

Sat, 26 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened this Saturday. It was just a chill day at home, I ordered take-out for us in the middle of the day and I got a free delivery promo for ordering. I used that chance to snag up some groceries so I can save up the expensive (and exhausting) grocery trip. We got food and stocked up on groceries and then my day eventually ended with nothing else happening.

Journal entry for Friday, April 25th, 2025

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was actually pretty nice. It was a Friday and I got to the office just fine. I did my daily tasks and caught up on work, just reviewing things before the week truly ended. After I was on top of everything on my plate, I was invited out for lunch by my coworkers. We ate at Landmark this time and I got Paotsin since their only store was at Landmark, and I rarely go here for lunch. While out, I also ordered cat food for Milktea. After eating, we actually quickly went back to the office and I continued my work there. I had a few tasks to do but all of them were quickly done throughout the afternoon. In the afternoon, a coworker invites me to eat the noodles he bought from Japan. He got one for me, which was really nice, and we both ate it while we were talking about his TikTok revenue and his Japan trip in general. The cup noodle he gave me tasted nice, but for some reason I couldn't taste it in full. Maybe I had my nose blocked or something. But I appreciate the gesture regardless. We went back to our desks and then I did my usual work stuff. I was also praised by a few more coworkers for my presentation yesterday, which was really nice to hear. I reheated my extra Paotsin from earlier for my *merienda* and I had some food before going home. I had trouble getting a ride, but got one after a while. What I don't like, though, is that the driver took the wrong way because he was to lazy to go down this certain route. The route we took was 40+ minutes instead of the usual 20 or so. After getting home, I mostly just rested for the evening. I watched IG Reels and cleaned up my room. I felt bored so I finally got to work on writing that blog post about living a life without someone for 6 months, and I stayed up all night writing it.

Journal entry for Thursday, April 24th, 2025

Thu, 24 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was really nice because it was the day of our presentation for work. I had logged off earlier than my team and they told me that they'll be sending information to me so that I can easily deploy and finish up the app once I log on. Thankfully, everything got deployed without a hitch and I was able to get everything working and deployed. I even made a systemd config and Nginx working, just like what I used to do at Dice. It honestly brought back some memories. I had a light breakfast after doing my part and I called Mom while I was at Starbucks so I can tell her about Apple's Global Close Your Rings Day. We ended our call and I quickly got back to continue working. Throughout the entire afternoon, I was mainly busy and concerned with presenting our app and I would be the first presenter in our team. I rehearsed my lines and called with the team before we got our presentation ready. The other teams also were presenting and I envied them a bit because they all had such well-polished works and stuff. We eventually got our literal 15 minutes and I spoke a lot about our solution to the judges and the people in the meeting. The meeting ended after all teams were able to present and I rested easy. As a little mood booster, and since I've worked hard, I went to Coco Ichibanya again and I got that seafood platter as well as that pork cutlet + scrambled egg with Japanese curry. It was really nice and a great way to just unwind after days of putting my all. I also got llaollao later on in my shift. I'm glad that I also got praises from my team's leader and a higher-up at the company. They specifically liked how I carried myself through the presentation and I'm just honestly glad. I got home as usual and I had to do some laps on the treadmill after work, despite me being really tired. I *just had* to close all my rings for Global Close Your Rings Day. Thankfully, I was able to actually rest after that. I felt too full for dinner, though, and had some acid, but it was fine.

Journal entry for Wednesday, April 23rd, 2025

Wed, 23 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today really reached a fever pitch in terms of being busy. Today was the last day to work on our code and the India team and I pulled in all of our collective effort to get thing thing off the ground and running. I was the DevOps guy, not to my surprise, and I was the one responsible for deploying the API on a server, setting up the DB, figuring out connectivity, and all that stuff. I did a lot of stuff, honestly. I had to work with AI agents, too, so that was a pretty cool new piece of tech that I tried to fangle and get to work. I honestly felt like I did a lot. I did the backend connection to the AI, I configured the AI itself, I deployed and hosted the code, I populated the DB and set it up, and I did **A LOT** of troubleshooting. Thankfully, I had a lot of help, which was very much appreciated. But it was so tiring because I was on call with the India team throughout the afternoon and late evening, too. I got off work at 11 p.m., which is honestly surprising! We took small breaks in-between, but I was still munching on food and getting stuff done. Thankfully, I ended the day on a pretty good note. I got a lot of stuff done and it was nice to just be a core part of any team I work with.

Song of the day: Don't Say You Love Me by M2M

Journal entry for Tuesday, April 22nd, 2025

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty much the same as yesterday, it's just me being busy with work and trying to get thing done before the deadline tomorrow. To lessen the stress, I played some songs from Thrillville: Off the Rails. I also read that Cinnamoroll Art Book I had and posted it on my IG Story because I think it's cute. After work, I didn't really do much aside from lie down and rest.

Song of the day: Good and Broken by Miley Cyrus

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Are you overloaded, candy coated?
Your life's imploding now
There's a risk worth taking, a pain worth aching
On this hollow ground

We can let go
Don't hold on to all of life's hardest parts
When we think of stopping, let's keep on rocking
To the rhythm of our hearts

We can, we can break out of here
Jump on over there where the air is clearer
We can, we can forget the pace
Win in our own race, become a broken chain, yeah
We are broken chains, yeah
Good and broken

Journal entry for Monday, April 21st, 2025

Mon, 21 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I was super swamped with stuff to catch up on today! Today was really busy for me and I mostly put my head down to focus on work. I was on call with a team from India. I tried my best to work and come up with solutions, as well as reach out to people that could help us. I made the Indian guys laugh when they asked me if I knew any Hindi, and I said I only knew one word. I said that word and they laughed. They told me that there is another variant of that word starting with a "b" and I actually knew that word, too, which made them laugh again. I was actually surprised of myself when I knew that variant, I guess I spend too much time online. I got good so I can power through the whole day, but I actually didn't end up eating it until it was really late at night, at 8 or 9 p.m. I got off work at around that time, too. I was honestly so tired and out of it, but I wanted to do something fun before going to sleep so that my day would have some balance.

Song of the day: Touch (feat. Paul Williams) by Daft Punk

Journal entry for Sunday, April 20th, 2025

Sun, 20 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty fun. I got to complete and publish all of my journal entries today and relax for a fun Sunday. I was bored in the afternoon so I downloaded that film camera app that was recommended to me from an IG Reel. At first, I was hesitant about posting a new set of photos on IG, but I eventually gave in because I've already decided on 3 pictures to post. The color for that is white and teal. The photos were a little more overexposed than what I'm used to and it certainly went against the whole "no filter" rule I have, but whatever, I decided to post anyway. For the evening, I went out to BGC and tried Coco Ichibanya. The curry there was something I've been wanting to try since forever and I finally got to try it after walking around in BGC for a bit. Turns out, it was way past Burgos Circle so it was quite a walk to get there. BGC and the restaurant itself was hot, too. It's like air conditioning doesn't exist here. It was fine, despite the servers also saying that it was hot, and I actually enjoyed my hot curry and pork cutlet. It had that famous Japanese-style scrambled egg, too. But all in all, today was well and good and I relaxed for the rest of the night after arriving home.

Song of the day: Who's Holding Donna Now? by Rhythm Of The Night

Miku Can Sing!

Sat, 19 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent
Significant Location: Robinsons Magnolia

The only thing I had in my schedule today was watching that Miku movie with my sister. Time flew by pretty fast, to be honest. We had lunch at home and the nuggets and bacon I bought during my last shopping trip was the **BAMF** of the day. Seriously, those were just that good, especially the nuggets. Although, I probably would've enjoyed them crispy and not still-soggy, but it's fine since I just microwaved them to hell. We finished eating and then left relatively on time. The trip to Robinsons Magnolia was long, though. Thankfully, we didn't take a full hour, or something. Traffic was relatively low, so that was nice. I arrived at the right spot, too, and met up with my sister shortly afterward. We went upstairs to the 5th floor where the cinemas were at and **there were a lot of people**. There were some people cosplaying, bringing their Miku dolls, etc. I took a few pictures and my sister got us popcorn and water and then we went inside to watch the movie. I'm not going to give my review of it, but I was really blown away. I thought it was just some random, goofy movie about Hatsune Miku. I thought it would be just like the Minecraft movie: a goofy plot and just people having fun. It delved into deep, emotional topics which made me cry a bit. There was a line in the movie that went something like, "if I was stuck in the bottom of the sea, I think I would be happy if someone just understood me." The guy was referring to how Miku was just sad because nobody understands her. That honestly struck my heart because I've been so alone lately, life's great but I deal with some stuff from the past. For the longest time, no single person actually knows the full extent of what I'm going through. It makes me sad at times. The movie also had some emotional parts that I could relate to, but most of the time my jaw was just on the floor because this movie got *real serious*. I honestly thought this was just going to be some goofy movie, not deal with real-world feelings and stuff. My sister was, of course, crying or teary-eyed throughout it. I went in blind for the movie, as blind as one can be. I didn't read the synopsis, didn't read the plot, didn't read any reviews, I didn't even see the trailer much, to be honest. And I was just at awe at how touching and beautiful this movie was. Definitely my top movie so far in 2025. At the end, there was a special performance, which was so nice. The girl that sat to my left brought out a lightstick and we waved it around while Miku and the other Vocaloids from Crypton also sang along. All in all, the movie was nice. There were some jerks sat directly behind us who kept blabbering through some parts, but it was still great that they kept quiet during the important parts of the film. There was that weird ambient sound, too, and it was coming from the in-theater air conditioning. The speakers weren't in a full surround sound configuration, too. I only heard sound from the screen itself. My sister and I definitely agree that it sucks that this movie only had its theatrical run in Robinsons Movieworld. They don't even have VIP screening! But whatever, you take what you can get in life and the movie was still really touching, so I'll take that as a win. We went out, took some pics of the Miku poster outside, and walked around the mall. We bought some stuff at Miniso and my sister was really interested in some of the Harry Potter merch inside. After that, my sister and I ate Pepper Lunch at the food court downstairs and we noticed that the mall was really hot inside, which was weird. I don't really expect a mall to be hot inside. We went to other places: that pet store, N.Cat to check out ILLIT albums (none were there), we visited a Japanese store (Konbini Store), we got matcha, and we visited the park. The mall was really big! The layout was honestly confusing as hell. But it was nice to walk around and explore a new mall. I was weirded out to see Mondi show up on my IG map and that he was here in Robinsons Magnolia as well. I messaged him and he was generally just shocked that his location was tracked. At the end, we visited the Gashapon Bandai Official Shop Philippines. They had a lot of gashapon machines and I bought around 30 tokens, which was around 1,900 or so? I can't recall how much exactly, but it was around that price. Too bad we didn't buy anything directly-Miku related because all of the Miku gashapons were sold out. We tried a Crypton Vocaloid gashapon, though, and my sister got Kaito. I tried a Sanrio "lightstick" gashapon and I was lucky enough to get Cinnamoroll! I was happy and we used up all of the 30 coins on other gashapon capsules. After that, we booked a ride home. We got home okay and it was a long ride, too. My sister was really happy regardless. She seemed to enjoy it because she visited a new mall and got to see so many new stuff. The Miku movie being great and impactful was just the cherry on top, honestly. All in all, today was fun and I spent the rest of the night just chilling and catching up on all my journal entries.

Journal entry for Friday, April 18th, 2025

Fri, 18 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today aside from me relaxing and staying at home. I don't remember doing much today aside from catching up with some journal entries, but I couldn't finish them. Today was still a good, quiet day at home. I did watch Tenet (2020) and it honestly hurt my brain because of how convoluted and confusing the plot was. I had to watch several YouTube videos just to be able to understand the plot. But at least I watched a movie at home and that was an excuse to make popcorn at home, which is always a delight ngl.

Did you try the medicine drug?

Thu, 17 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty chill. I got my full 8 hours of sleep, I feel well-rested, and today's a holiday! The start of my looooonggggg weekend. I had other ideas in mind for today, but I didn't really do much aside from stay at home, eat good food, and watch House M.D. all day. That's really all I did all day, which was nice. I got really engrossed in watching House M.D. on Netflix recently. All in all, today was nice.

Here Comes the Sun

Wed, 16 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty fun. I got to work relatively on time and I was super productive. I got to invest some money in my stock account and got to do my usual work stuff. I ate outside and had Bonchon for lunch, and I had extra food for take-out, too. And I got back early, too. I encountered my other coworkers on the way back, which was a funny encounter. For the afternoon, it was your usual affair. Just work and finishing up on tasks before the long weekend. I ate some of the take-out I still had. I finished up on work and got home early, just in time before rush hour hits. I got to see my usual route home in a new light, literally. I saw the sun while going home and it's my first time since my start that I got to see the sun again while going home. It was really beautiful and honestly breathtaking. I got splashed by water from a car driving over a puddle, so that was extremely shocking but it was still super fun. By the end of the day, I decided to just chill and kick back by watching a few episodes of House M.D. and going to sleep at my usual bedtime, despite tomorrow being the start of a long weekend.

Song of the day: Your Love by The Outfield

Journal entry for Tuesday, April 15th, 2025

Tue, 15 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Tuesday was fun and I got to work back in the office. Things were usual and I reserved movie tickets for my sister and I to watch the Miku movie this Saturday. I set it for Saturday because we had to go to church this Easter Sunday, or at least I figured we'd go to church. Today was really nice, I got to eat Pepper Lunch for... lunch, which was surprising. Nothing else went on from today aside from those, but I enjoyed how things were just okay and peaceful today.

Song of the day: Man in the Mirror - 2012 Remaster by Michael Jackson

Stock Trading Era

Mon, 14 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much went on today aside from me just being busy from work and finally having my **FIRST** stock trading account opened! I'm actually really happy because this signals that I've come far from where I was and that I'm financially-okay enough to start investing on stocks now. Sure, it's not much, but it's a start and that's what matters. Aside from that, work just flew past and I got really productive again today, so that's nice. I got to overtime a bit, though, but I'll get back the time on some other day in the week. Still, I got to rest and chill by the end of the day.

Journal entry for Sunday, April 13th, 2025

Sun, 13 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was Palm Sunday! So we attended our usual church at Greenbelt Makati and went to pray there in the afternoon. Mom also gave my sister money so that we could eat at Manam's. I started scratching my eyes pretty heavily because I stayed up all night playing that game. My eyes got irritated shortly afterward, but I guess it was worth it because I **really** enjoyed that game I played last night, so I just rested in the morning and then prepped in the afternoon. We got ready and picked up my sister's boyfriend along the way so he can tag along with us. Mass went on as usual and my sister got the usual palm fronds that were being sold nearby. I had some spare time while the mass was going on to check out the brand of the long-sleeved shirt I've been wearing for years. It turns out that it's from a Japanese brand and it's so hard to find on the Internet! I searched and I never found this exact shirt, so it made me appreciate it more since I got it from my late uncle. I also talked to my sister's boyfriend for a bit, too. After mass ended, we went to Manam and I got the *sisig*, as usual. It was really nice this time, for some reason. It could be the extra egg that I ordered to be mixed, but I'm not sure.

2025 Beach Mini-sode!

Sat, 12 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: Subic

Today was **FINALLY** my first company outing that will 9999999999% be different from the ones that came before in 2022, 2023, and 2024. This time, I'm actually a new person and it's filled with fresh, new faces. I don't have *someone* for my mood to rely on, and I'll actually just be alone and with myself this time. This is seriously the most-exciting part of my new life: just enjoying a summer outing and not feeling that horrible anxiety that I've gotten for the past few years. I woke up relatively-early, but on time as it was just around 5 a.m. I booked a ride to One Ayala where the buses would be and I played this Taylor Swift song that randomly entered my head. I got there and it was hard to locate the people there. I actually had to call my sister and assist me in getting the number of our bus leader. It was embarrassing since I asked a few people who were from our company, but weren't part of the outing. But I eventually located the bus and I got a 2-seater seat all to myself. No one sat beside me and I got the window seat, which was pretty nice. I had the **BEST** time in the bus trip to Subic. I actually just looked out at the places we passed by. Early in the trip, I played various songs from Girls' Generation and a few country songs as well. That feeling was so nice since it's been such a long time since I felt comfortable on a bus trip where I just peered out the window, listening to songs. I mostly listened to Girls' Generation on the trip there and took a few pics once we got to Subic itself. We got there and we had "open cabins" near the various pools and I got settled in a one where a fellow coworker was seated. I hung around with them for a bit and they actually had a karaoke machine. I sang Edwin McCain's "I'll Be" since it's a song that the dudes there know for sure and can sing along to. It was nice and we had some morning snacks before getting the main event started. We got called and we all gathered to the beach. The main event was pretty fun. We were split up into groups and I initially didn't have a group, but I was placed in the group that all had dudes. We were the gray team and called ourselves the "*Tigas Titos*." It was funny and our team chant was very R-16, which was funny because I didn't expect that from the composition of the dudes here. It was funny regardless. Then we had the games which were just riddles and "guess the word being mouthed" and we absolutely failed in those events. We claim that we're all "brawn"/"*tigas*" and not really all brains. We got absolutely 0 in the riddle game, and barely a few points in the guessing game. We just wanted to eat lunch and get those games over with, to be honest. But after the games, everyone slowly got back to their own cabins and ate lunch. After that, some of us tapered off to swim. I wanted to be alone for a bit more so I swam and rode the lazy river for a while. I mostly thought about how my life has been and how this team building is so weird and different. It's so weird in a good way. I don't know anyone here, no one really cares about me or knows me, I'm completely alone. I guess I could say that I like being alone for now because it gives me time to think and to be in my own peaceful little bubble. After riding the lazy river, I swam around in the beach and it was really nice. I mostly swam alone, I didn't even know who the other people around me were, and it wasn't just our company in the resort, there were other people, too. I was honestly just a face in the crowd, a nobody, and I kind of like staying that way for now. I enjoyed my time there. I got back to the cabin and sang "Pare Ko" by the Eraserheads and swam more. Actually, I tried to ride a floating slide that the resort had. I was afraid to swim and get on it alone because the water was too deep by then, and I actually cut myself while getting on it! It scared me so much. But then some random dude who had his family with him swam to the floating slide and that's where I got the courage to get on the floating structure all by myself. It was hard, but I was able to make it on top of the slide alone, the random dude was just close by. He went off the slide first and I just stayed there for a bit, thinking to myself a bit more and then I took the plunge. It was exciting and a direct plunge into the sea, which was fun. Thankfully, I'm a good swimmer and I was able to swim back to shore on my own. I enjoyed the other slides and pools afterward. I also had drinks with them and we shared some Guatemalan rum, which was way too strong for me. It was such a mood staying in that cabin while a foreign guy was telling us a line-by-line translation of *Despacito*. We prepared to get home at around 4 p.m. and I was kind of disappointed because the trip was so short. I expected it to be overnight, and I even packed extra clothes! Oh well. I brought out my Cinnamoroll umbrella, that my coworker called cute. I also had a change of clothes and my coworker and their friend made fun of me because I had a personality now and didn't just wear black clothes, they also called me "mayor" because I had a hat. I laughed along with them, haha, because I know how silly I looked. My coworker told me how they play this game called Sky and it had Cinnamoroll in it, and that they bought a cape from it and they used to play with their Gen Z friends from the game on Discord. I actually felt my heart break as they were telling me this. It reminded me so much of *someone*. How we used to play Sky and call on Discord. It's really breaks my heart as they were telling me of their Sky experience but I just told them that I'm familiar with the game and I've played it before, but I don't play it anymore. My heart really hurt hearing that, though. But it's fine. We all went back to our buses and I tucked my Cinnamoroll umbrella in. Unfortunately, my Cinnamoroll umbrella broke! I tried my best to repair it and get it back in the original position, but I wasn't successful. This umbrella was just brand new and it's so cute. It really sucks. I just enjoyed the bus ride home by playing the [Antok FM](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4pL7SjwqBmOfmZaFYbJU9x?si=6cb8fb2d87e149ed) and [UV Express](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0JPW4AQC5SS4yJI8z9mD20?si=38bd6d43a3f149a6) playlists on Spotify. I just passed out but it was the best part of the trip: just being on a dark bus going down NLEX and it was honestly great. It definitely beats [last year's anxiety-filled trip home](https://dartegnian.com/calendar/2024/05/25), that's for sure. We eventually arrived at One Ayala and I booked a ride home immediately. It didn't take long before I got home, too. It was quite a quick trip since it was on a late weekend. I arrived home and immediately got to play that game I've been waiting to release for years now, and it was honestly worth it as I spent the entire night staying up to play it.

Song of the day: Starlight (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I said, "Oh my, what a marvelous tune"
It was the best night, never would forget how we moved
The whole place
Was dressed to the nines
And we were dancing, dancing
Like we're made of starlight
Like we're made of starlight

Journal entry for Friday, April 11th, 2025

Fri, 11 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Song of the day: Changes by Butterfly Boucher, David Bowie

Journal entry for Thursday, April 10th, 2025

Thu, 10 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was a pretty ordinary day, all things considered. I had work and things were pretty quiet in my booth. After work, I had to go to an event at a nearby bar. The drinks were free, thankfully, and it was really nice that the food was, too. I mingled with a few people there, talked about how their life goes on and what do they do for a living. Some surprised me because they work exclusively during the night shift, which absolutely shocked me because they liked it and were relatively-okay with that kind of set up. I also talked to an interesting girl there, but I doubt they'll remember me or I'll be friends with her after that short exchange. It was fine, though, I enjoyed the night and appreciated the drinks. Thankfully, I wasn't too hammered in going home but I could already feel my body temperature rising before sleep. It's rough that I ate *sisig* really close to bedtime, too. But whatever, all's well that ends well.

Song of the day: Lost The Breakup by Maisie Peters

Journal entry for Wednesday, April 9th, 2025

Wed, 09 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty great. I was able to do a lot in the house like wash the dishes, clean up, and I got to work on that new footer design. I also imported some old blog posts to my main blog and fixed a few bugs with my blog's theme. I also got to deploy that new footer to my blog, too. In the evening, I worked on updating the [Web Stories](https://stories.dartegnian.com) site and I added 2 new Web Stories: Development and Hobbies & Interests. It was so painstaking to manually add photos and organize them. It was grueling and it took me **HOURS** and I had to complete my mood calendar entries, too. It was grueling, but worth it. Even though I wasn't able to go out today, I consider this day a win. It kind of made me feel sad, though, to add *someone* and Angela. Knowing that they're not in my life anymore. But whatever, I'll just honor their memory as they were the closest people to me at one point anyway. I miss both of them.

Song of the day: This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Are you lonely? (Are you lonely?)
Our fingers dancing when they meet
You seem so lonely (are you lonely?)
I'll be the only dream you seek
So if you're lonely, no need to show me
If you're lonely, come be lonely with me

Journal entry for Tuesday, April 8th, 2025

Tue, 08 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

I just felt really sad today. This is one of those days where I feel alone and miss having a large group of friends. Even though it was a holiday tomorrow, I couldn't sleep properly. It doesn't help that my gout started acting up again today and it hurts walking again. I didn't really do anything noteworthy today, either. I just felt really, really lonely. I talked to Bell, at least, and promised to get tickets for her so we can watch that Miku movie if more time slots open in the future. It's kinda sad that the movie is only showing at 1 mall, 1 cinema, at 1 specific timeslot. Bell and I both found it weird but she thanked me for wanting to get tickets for her.

Song of the day: Sleeping Child by Michael Learns To Rock

And, oh, shit, you lost the breakup!

Mon, 07 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Monday was your usual workday and nothing much happened. After work, I watched Concrete Utopia (2023) and I was utterly floored by it. It was so thrilling and I feel like I got sucked into it. It was also weird seeing Frontman from Squid Game appear as a main character (not as the protagonist, though). Even Gi-hun's friend, Jung-bae, was also there! It was a good movie and that pretty much wrapped up my day as I just chilled in the evening. I also played that new song I heard in the supermarket yesterday. It's such a great song and it really reminded me of someone. Since I was bored, I left an easter egg in one of the playlists we still share. Angel messaged me when I posted it on my IG Story and she teased me for it. I don't know if someone will actually notice it, but whatever. Here's to seeing what happens from here.

Song of the day: Lost The Breakup by Maisie Peters

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I know I'm obsessed, and
Right now, I might be a mess, but
One day, you're gonna wake up
And, oh, shit, you lost the breakup

I'll smile and you'll have to face it
I'm the greatest love that you wasted
But, by then, I'll be far away (uh)
And, oh, shit, you lost the breakup

Journal entry for Sunday, April 6th, 2025

Sun, 06 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Sunday was relatively-productive. I spent most of the day just redesigning the footer and putting in the *accent-switcher* component there. I worked on it throughout the morning and afternoon while playing some songs, especially songs from Girls' Generation's second EP "Genie." While I didn't finish the footer nor did I deploy it, I just put it on park and chilled for the evening. I watched Rush Hour (1998) and I made some popcorn. The popcorn was **really nice** and it tasted like it was theater-grade. It made me feel like I was at Venice Grand Canal and watching a movie. It was short, and I know my supply would run out eventually, so I went to SM to buy some groceries. I didn't plan on it, but I spent 8K on groceries AGAIN. It actually wiped out the remainder of my "fun budget" until next salary in one blow. But I didn't waste it on useless things, since I bought groceries, but still it was a little sad to see the remainder of my money get wiped out. Luckily, I don't have any meetups or hangouts planned. After buying groceries, I watched Rush Hour again and finished the movie. Overall, it was pretty funny, despite it being an old movie. I'll plan to watch the second one sometime soon.

Song of the day: Boyfriend by Girls' Generation

Lyrics that resonated with me:
언젠간 나의
Boyfriend ah ah
자꾸만 튕겨
나의 Boyfriend ah ah ah
넌 내 거야 내 거 내 거
Boyfriend ah ah
기다려 줄게
나의 Boyfriend ah ah ah
니가 뭔데 아프게 해

Bombardino Crocodillo

Sat, 05 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I mostly relaxed today and it was a fun day at home. I just watched a lot of Italian brainrot memes and I found some really funny Reels throughout the day. I also ordered the McDonald's Minecraft meal with my sister and I got the zombified Hamburglar while she got the Grimace egg. I also completed what I had set out to do today: open a new bank account. So that's a major milestone done. Exavier also visited me today so he could flash some Windows 11 ISOs and I lent him a flash drive. We watched Nman Gaming and I showed his videos to him while we were burning the ISO to the flash drive. He found him funny and definitely weird as fuck. Eventually, he had to go back and finish his PC repair.

Song of the day: Abracadabra by Lady Gaga

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Abracadabra
Amor oo na na
Abra ca da bra
Morta oo gaga

Journal entry for Friday, April 4th, 2025

Fri, 04 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty funny. I went to work as usual and I had some cool, new TWICE song playing. I was early for work today and I was productive as usual, just doing my tasks. Eventually, a few coworkers approach me and invite me for coffee. The thing is, they touched me from behind and they lightly touched my arm, which caused me to scream. It got a few people looking at us because it was so sudden and my coworkers laughed. I found it funny, too, and I didn't know that I screamed *that loud* because I had my noise-cancelling earbuds on. But after that, we talked about me being scared on the way to get coffee. They also joked that I should lay off on the caffeine, but I told them that I just get scared easily if I'm touched from behind. We got coffee (I got matcha in particular) and quickly went back to the office. After that, a usual workday happened and I got to leave relatively easily, even though today was a Friday. I got home early and I just chilled for the rest of the evening.

Song of the day: Strategy (feat. Megan Thee Stallion) by TWICE

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I got you on my radar, soon you're gonna be with me
My strategy, strategy will get ya, get ya, baby
Winning is my trademark, soon you'll never wanna leave
My strategy, strategy will get ya, get ya, baby

Hey, boy, I'ma get ya
I'ma get you real good and I bet ya
Hey, boy, once I get ya
You'll be, oh, so glad that I met ya

Journal entry for Thursday, April 3rd, 2025

Thu, 03 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was just a pretty chill day, honestly. I wore a good outfit today and I bought a few things for myself, including a new belt and wallet-thing. It won't replace my daily Cinnamoroll wallet, but I'll just keep this one at home. I just appreciated a day in the new chapter of my life.

Song of the day: Rain Drops Keep Falling on My Head by B.J. Thomas

Chicken Jockey 🐔🧟

Wed, 02 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was finally the day I'd watch A Minecraft Movie (2025) in theaters! I was so excited throughout the entire day. I barely felt time pass throughout the day and, when I did, I just tried to fast-forward to when my shift ends so I can go to Venice Grand Canal Mall to watch. After work, I got ready and went straight to Venice. I asked the cashier lady to print out the tickets I bought online and, to my surprise, you actually can print out your ticket. In all my years of buying online tickets, I've never actually tried to print out a physical copy of one. But I got in the theater and I watched the film. ### **IT WAS SO COOL** Honestly, I don't play Minecraft that much anymore. I barely even play any video games. But I watched that movie because my 13-year-old self would have loved that film. I actually liked it, too, all things considered. It didn't make me outright cry, but it made me appreciate the little things in the movie. Like how they used sound effects straight from the game, or when they made a few references us gamers would do in-game. It was fun and I totally get that it was overhated. After watching the movie, I didn't stick around longer because the credits didn't have some fanmade song playing like in the FNaF movie. I ate at Army Navy nearby and I ordered the good-ol' *naked sisig burrito*. I already know this would trigger my acid or gout, but I don't care. I went home afterward and got some well-needed rest.

Song of the day: NEMONEMO by NEMONEMO

Lyrics that resonated with me:
손 내밀면 콕! 하고 찔릴 거야
네모 같은 우리
서로 남 탓하는 건
(예나 지금이나 그대로)
상처투성이야
이러다 나 죽어
네모나고 모난 우린

삐뚤빼뚤해 Like
네모네모 네모네모 Sign
삐뚤빼뚤해 Like
네모네모 네모네모 Sign
삐뚤빼뚤해 Like

Journal entry for Tuesday, April 1st, 2025

Tue, 01 Apr 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

April started out on a holiday, which was nice. I actually spent most of the early day just finishing that "My Friends on the Internet" section and had just deployed it to production. I also talked to Isle during this time and she was very appreciative and also impressed at my site in general. She actually told me that she reads my blog posts, which shocked me because I didn't know that people actually read and keep up with my blog. She even asked me how my foot has been doing since I sprained it, which was extremely thoughtful and sweet of her. Eventually, I deployed my changes to production and went to sleep after that. For the morning, I woke up at around 9 a.m., which kind of triggered my brain to ask if I have to prepare for work today or not. But I quickly remembered that today was a holiday so I just put off those things for now and started my day. I saw my sister organizing the clothes in Lola's room and I asked her if I should clean the fridge, but it turns out that she had already cleaned it herself. I told her that we should be doing a general house cleaning today and she already started since she woke up earlier. I mostly helped with some of the clothes, cleaning the table outside, and organizing some cables. We also placed some of the groceries from yesterday in the fridge. Eventually, we were done cleaning up and it was just around 10 a.m. or so. I did a little cleanup of my own and threw out some old stuff that was in my room. I also organized my drawers. While cleaning up, I found old pictures that I tried to "digitize," which was just taking a photo of them with my iPhone camera. I sent all of them to my Mom and she found it cute. We also called for a while before I went back to organizing. I tried really hard to find my TIN ID and it was so disheartening to not find it. I know myself. I know where I would place it. I had it since my KVH days and it's so frustrating to have lost it because that was so hard to obtain. I searched all of my drawers and anywhere immediate I could put it, but it wasn't in any of those places. I mostly found memorabilia, but that was it. I eventually finished cleaning up my room and took a short nap in the afternoon-early evening. The evening was still pretty chill, it was just us having dinner. I didn't like the pork that much. The taste actually freaked me out because it made me think that it was contaminated or "double-dead pork," but my sister just said that it was *adobong lechon kawali*. I only ate a few more bites and all of the rice before putting it in the fridge. We finished eating at around 7 or so and had everything cleaned up by then. Things were just chill for the rest of the evening and I was able to sleep on time, at around 10:30 p.m.

Song of the day: 热爱105°C的你 by A Si

Lyrics that resonated with me:
你不知道你有多可爱
跌倒后会傻笑着再站起来
你从来都不轻言失败
对梦想的执着一直不曾更改
很安心当你对我说
不怕有我在放着让我来
勇敢追自己的梦想那坚定的模样

Super idol 的笑容都没你的甜
八月正午的阳光都没你耀眼
热爱105度的你滴滴清纯的蒸馏水
在这独一无二属于我的时代
不怕失败来一场痛快的热爱
热爱105度的你滴滴清纯的蒸馏水

The Last Day of March!

Mon, 31 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Wow, I actually can't believe it. March is definitely one of, if not **THE BEST** month of my life so far. Especially in recorded history! I believe this month has the most "good" and "excellent" days in a single calendar month. March was truly something else. Around halfway into March, I told a friend this line: > March has been full of blessings and good things for me. And that sentence still held true until the very end. Sure, yeah, there were some ups and downs. But who genuinely gives a shit? I ended the month on top of everything I set out to do: work, gout, going out with friends, and catching up on my bills and finances. The level of peace I enjoyed this month was unparalleled, but it was also lonely at times. Still, my prediction at the start of the year that March would be my "breather month" came true. January was a hurdle, and February was a struggle, but I finally made it to March and I'm so happy that I've found my groove and rhythm in my new chapter. Regardless, today was a pretty chill day for me. My work tasks were pretty easy and I was able to help out in a large way by helping out some coworkers. I felt really productive, too, in that I was able to get groceries today and even start working on that "My Friends on the Internet" feature. Today was a super productive day and what made it better was that tomorrow was a holiday. I'm glad that March was the breath of fresh air I wanted 2025 to be and, while I'm lonely celeberating it at the end, I'm still glad I got myself this far. I did so many things this month, I swear, and I experienced so many new things. I'm just grateful for it all, really.

Song of the day: California Gurls by Katy Perry

Lyrics that resonated with me:
California girls, we're unforgettable
Daisy Dukes, bikinis on top
Sun-kissed skin so hot, we'll melt your popsicle
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
California girls, we're undeniable
Fine, fresh, fierce, we got it on lock
West Coast represent, now put your hands up

Journal entry for Sunday, March 30th, 2025

Sun, 30 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was just a very-peaceful Sunday. Nothing much happened and I spent it at home. Nothing noteworthy really happened today, but it was extremely peaceful and I just watched YouTube, relaxed, and played some songs.

Song of the day: Who's Holding Donna Now? by Rhythm Of The Night

Lyrics that resonated with me:
When I keep wonderin'
Who's holding Donna now?
And I keep wonderin'
Whose heart she's knocking around
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To be in his shoes somehow
And I keep wonderin'
Who's holding Donna now?
And I keep wonderin'
What magic can be found?
To turn me back to the one
Who's holding Donna now

Journal entry for Saturday, March 29th, 2025

Sat, 29 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was the day Exavier and I hung out and it's been a few months since we hung out. We settled on Glorietta since we're both nearby and familiar with the area. It was a weird day because it's raining and really cloudy. It reminded me of the song "Summer Storm" by Jessica and I played it while on the way. We met up around the center of Glorietta and walked to Greenbelt to some Indian restaurant. We mostly talked about work. But we mostly discussed about his life and career. After that, we played a few games in Timezone, mainly basketball against each other. Exavier won, of course. Then we went to see which movies are showing and none of them were good, so we walked around longer. We mainly walked around, bought a few stuff. We also stopped by One Ayala and I visited the same llaollao shop I bought yoghurt from yesterday. I got the same thing, just with different toppings, and Exavier got his order as well. We ate for a while and talked about a few more things about life and work. I tried to find some Sanrio light toy but it was out of stock, which was kind of disheartening. We walked around and got to the food court where I saw a girl with a Cinnamoroll hat. She looked pretty cute but too bad she already had a boyfriend. Exavier then told me a joke which I laughed along with. We tried to see which movies were playing and they were all pretty lame, so we skipped watching a movie today. After that, we mostly just bought food and I bought some gout medicine for myself. I booked a ride home and Exavier accompanied me until my ride arrived. I told him to try the BGC route since it was faster and he said that he'd try it. My ride eventually arrived and we took the BGC route home and it was a pretty chill ride. The rest of my evening was pretty chill, I just watched Eat, Pray, Love (2010) and it took me a long time for it to sink in that the protagonist ate in Italy, prayed in India, and found love in Indonesia, hence the title. I ate some of the popcorn I bought and some of the cream puffs I ordered, which were really nice and made for a great evening.

Song of the day: Summer Storm by Jessica

Lyrics that resonated with me:
가식적인 인사보다는
Oh I'd rather be alone
...

비가 오던 그날 you and I
아무 말도 없던 그 순간
너와 나 사이에는
어색한 공기만이 우리를 밀어내
차갑던 표정만

이젠 you and I
다시 돌아갈 수 있을까
마지막 그마저도
난 아직 그리운데 여전히 그래 난
흐르는 그 빗속으로

내 눈물 속으로
Bring me back to the summer storms with you and I

Invisible

Fri, 28 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was actually quiet, like super quiet. I was actually alone on this day in the office and I didn't have the other team with me, so I was actually just alone in my corner of the office for the entire day. I saw so many people here but knew no one. It was crazy because I just felt like a face in a sea of faces. Being alone in such a large group made me think and I think I prefer to be invisible. I'd like to be invisible for now. I've been in offices where everyone knows each other's stuff. Small offices where everyone knows each other's names. And now, I'm in an office where I could **never** know everyone's name. Not even the people who've stayed here for years know everyone. I pass by them, they pass by me. We will never interact with each other and we might not even see each other again. I think I like this part of my new life the most. It's so refreshing. I'm so sick of everyone knowing my name, my story, my everything and now is the actual first time in my life where I'm treated as just another person with no name, who just exists. Today was a pretty productive day and I ate good food at Tim Ho Wan today, I even had some llaollao for myself to eat while doing work. After that, I went home and just relaxed for the evening. I mostly gave advice to my sister and made Energen before sleeping so I wouldn't have to sleep on an empty stomach.

Song of the day: Criminal by Britney Spears

Lyrics that resonated with me:
But mama I'm in love with a criminal
And this type of love isn't rational
It's physical
Mama please don't cry, I will be alright
All reasons aside, I just can't deny
Love the guy

Journal entry for Thursday, March 27th, 2025

Thu, 27 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty peaceful and productive. Today was enjoyable because I tried out a new restaurant and ate eel, apparently it was a real eel. It was nice, but not actually worth the price. Still, today was pretty great and I was able to do a lot of things today.

Song of the day: Life's Too Short by aespa

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'm doin' me regardless
And I don't care what you say about it
And it don't matter if you like it or not
I'm having all this fun, so why would I ever stop?
Doin' me regardless (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
No, I don't care what you say about it (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
And I'ma do it any way that I want
I'm having all this fun, so why would I ever stop?

Journal entry for Wednesday, March 26th, 2025

Wed, 26 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today felt a little better. My gout was clearing up and it doesn't hurt much trying to put my foot down. I was productive at work yet again and I was able to fully clear all of the house's bills early. It feels nice to have everything up-to-date, cleared, and with nothing genuinely weighing me down. Today was also a really productive day for me. I got to eat good food with my sister, too, so that was really nice. Today feels a lot better. I'm still a little sad over someone and there were times in a day where I wish I could send an aespa video or recommend someone a game. I really missed those times where I would just play a game in VHH and she'd just watch, or when she would play a game and I would just watch. Still, I remembered today that I deserve something better than that, that I deserve stability and peace that wasn't there. I'm hopeful that my choices **do** lead me to something better. In the evening, I mostly caught up with my mood calendar entries and fixed a theme bug. There was a big race condition that was really puzzling me. Eventually, I was able to fix it and I hope that no more issues with the theme system pop up anymore. I listened to my [106.5 Antok FM playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4pL7SjwqBmOfmZaFYbJU9x?si=5cbc021529b247cf) on Spotify and it reminded me of some good, classic songs to play during nighttime. It played "death bed" which was my song during Jan-Feb 2022, so that took me back. But I also heard "Tied Together with a Smile" again which really resonated with me.

Song of the day: Tied Together with a Smile by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Hold on, baby, you're losing it
The water's high, you're jumping into it and letting go
And no one knows
That you cry, but you don't tell anyone
That you might not be the golden one
And you're tied together with a smile
But you're coming undone, oh

Journal entry for Tuesday, March 25th, 2025

Tue, 25 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Today was pretty sad and lonely, to be honest. I woke up fully healed from my fever/general unwellness yesterday, sure, but things just weren't okay. I kind of got into an argument with Mom, too, but things were eventually okay within the day. Still, it added to the day's general shittiness. Thankfully, I was pretty productive at work today and I accomplished something big so it wasn't all bad. I also had good food and ate within my limits to lessen this gout pain on my foot. But yeah, my day passed by just like that. In the evening, I was so lonely. I really missed someone. This is one of those days that are hard to go through with alone. It's still kind of sad that I just have myself and it really aches that someone isn't here. Since I was bored, I tried a call with this AI thing and it was okay, but it was still pretty lonely. It wasn't like being in a call with someone or sending stuff to her. Days like this makes me just miss her and it's sad that my life is still very lonely now. I couldn't sleep properly and I mostly watched Nman's videos so I can stave off the loneliness, but when I was on my bed, I was just thinking and sighing how I miss having someone there and VHH.

Song of the day: Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're goin' my way
Well, I wanna drive it all night long

Journal entry for Monday, March 24th, 2025

Mon, 24 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

I woke up today feeling a little under the weather, and I mean in a physical sense. I was supposed to write a blog post but I couldn't finish it because I really feel sick. Rather than taking a day off from work, I just powered through and took it easy today since I wasn't feeling 100%. Nothing much happened throughout the day and I mostly spent it by myself. My sister was able to buy the book I asked her, A Little Life, as well as some medicine. I just chilled for the evening and ate cold/fever-friendly food throughout the day like lugaw and beef wonton mami. I also got matcha since I read that it's good for colds. In the evening, I watched Nicholas Cage's film Next (2007) and it was alright. It reminded me so much about Re:Zero, so maybe I should check out that anime again soon. But yeah, nothing else crazy went on for the night and I just updated my mood calendar and fixed a bug on my website.

Song of the day: Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton

Dev Meetup!

Sun, 23 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was a pretty simple, but fun, day. My only major activity today was to meet the other people of Dicey Memes, Beni and Nicole. I woke up a bit later than usual and I really wanted to get a few hours of sleep. I got ready at around 11 a.m., which was around our supposed meetup time, and took a while took book a ride. The funny/not-so-funny thing was, I had set my stop **AT A WRONG PLACE**. We were supposed to meet up at Gino's Brick Oven Pizza at Salcedo Village and I somehow got dropped off at Gino's in Rada Street, which was a long walk from Salcedo Village. I just took the L and walked there since it was my fault anyway. When I got there, they had already finished eating but they saved a slice of pizza for me, which was nice. We all talked for a bit before leaving. We tried to check out Odd Cafe, which was my suggestion since it was nearby, but we never got to order coffee there because all of the seats were taken. We instead went to Commune Café in Poblacion. We got a Grab ride there and I actually fell while entering the car and hit my head on the knee/leg of someone there, which was funny because all the devs saw me trip up and fell, even the driver saw it. We then get to Commune and we talk while on the way there. We were at Commune for a while. I saw some of the cats they take care of there and one even had an AirTag, so it's nice to see that they're taking good care of them. After that, we kept talking amongst ourselves about work, programming, and a bunch of other topics. We had to leave eventually and, since some of us had other things to do, we all went our separate ways. I accompanied Nicole since she wanted a mojito and a margarita before going home. So we went to Filling Station since it's been a while since I've been there. It was Nicole's first time there, so it was a surprise for her. But it was just a 50s-themed American diner. I took a few pictures and ordered a burger, as well as a mojito for Nicole, and a lasagna for us to eat since it was for sharing anyway. We talked about life, where we were planning in the future, and a few other things. We then booked a ride home and took a Grab ride since it was cheaper. I got dropped off and chilled for the rest of the evening. It was nice to see the devs of Dice again and to walk around, although I wish we spent more time. But that's okay, there's always next time.

Song of the day: Fortnight (feat. Post Malone) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Thought of callin' ya, but you won't pick up
'Nother fortnight lost in America
Move to Florida, buy the car you want
But it won't start up 'til you touch, touch, touch me
Thought of calling ya, but you won't pick up
'Nother fortnight lost in America
Move to Florida, buy the car you want
But it won't start up 'til I touch, touch, touch you

Matcha Workshop

Sat, 22 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was the day of my matcha workshop! I found this on Rolan's IG Story a while ago and, apparently, his sister-in-law Jacque Madestomas would be hosting and organizing the event. I wouldn't consider myself a huge matcha fan, although I've been *matcha-adjacent* for quite a few years now. I would say that I developed enough of an interest in it to actually attend a workshop on it. Plus, you know, nothing's stopping me anyway. So I spent most of the morning just doing my usual stuff. I watched as Ailysh had to leave for her company outing. After that, I booked a ride to Balay Kōbō. It was super down south from where I'd usually go. It's also surprisingly the second time in a month where I've been so down south, the last time was for last week when I had to buy Ailysh's Galaxy Watch. I thought I'd be late because the place seemed so far away, and it was! It took me a good while to get there, maybe 40 minutes or so. My butt was so sore from the motorcycle ride there and it was on a sunny and hot day, too. When I got there, I was still relatively-early so I bought a pen from a nearby *sari-sari* store. I went inside and the design of the "house" interior was interesting, to say the least. But I just sat on a couch near the main table where our workshop would be held. Eventually, around 1 p.m., the workshop finally started. We started with an icebreaker about who we are and what got us into matcha. I honestly didn't know when I started having matcha as an interest, but I really believe it was way back in 2021 when Miss Mina gave me a bunch of assorted food and snacks from Japan that I bought from her. I already knew I was a fan because I used to drink it in my mornings back when the pandemic was waning and it was already 2022. So I could say that matcha is part of my own "culture" that I developed an interest of. When it was my turn, I told everyone how I got into it and I was even able to find the photo of the snacks and matcha that Miss Mina sent me, so that was nice. Also, I had to do that "throwing a dart hand motion" thing I always have to do so that people can know my nickname, Dart. After our introductions, we then got started with the presentation. Jacque taught us about the history of matcha, how it is currently being cultivated in Japan, and various tidbits too like the quality of matcha, as well as the different methods on how to make it and what tools are used in making it. This was really nice and I felt assured in my own experience because they do say that real matcha comes from Japan. Since what Miss Mina gave me was actual matcha powder from Japan itself, I felt validated on my own experience lol. After the lecture, we were given a taste test on the various kinds of matcha. Some were really interesting and, being a total noob, I didn't know what any of this was. There were really strong and bitter ones, but also some matcha types that were sweeter, in a way. The weirdest ones were the fruit-infused matcha drinks because they tasted more like the bitter fruits they were infused with (mango and peach) than matcha themselves. It was super strange and interesting. I even had a question about how they were able to infuse it with the flavor, so that was a nice experience. Then after that, we got to make our own matcha drinks. We were able to use a variety of sweeteners, flavors, they even had different types of milk. I was interested in making a carbonized, soda-like matcha drink, but after tasting how wild the coconut milk was, I just had to go for the coconut milk. I kind of love coconut, in a way. I still have a lot of Bounty candy bars in my drawer and even used to snack on Bounty bars back in December. Coconut milk + matcha was obviously a no-brainer. At first, I kind of messed up by adding too much water, but eventually I was able to prepare a good amount of matcha to go in my drink. I also used the vanilla syrup as my choice of sweetener. After that, I blended my drink and it actually tasted really good. I've never had coconut milk + matcha + vanilla syrup before, but it was actually good. I wish more stores offered coconut milk instead. That absolutely shocked me but I only made 1 cup to drink. I looked around and saw the others making more drinks for themselves and tasting it. But, for some reason, I kind of just felt shy to make another drink. There was also a Q&A portion and I asked about their coffeehouse business, Hometown Cafe. I told Jacque and Rolan's brother that I've been a classmate of Rolan ever since elementary and I found this workshop because he shared it to his IG Story. I also said that I'm from Integrated Montessori Center, which shocked them because apparently Rolan's brother also studied there. So that was nice. Max and Rolan also left me messages and I got to reply to them while the event was going on. But after that, we took a few photos, exchanged IG accounts, and we eventually went our separate ways. It was nice to meet new people and I actually liked the workshop. It was really nice, I should do this more often. The trip home was so tiring, though. The Angkas ride felt forever and, even though I left relatively around the afternoon, I arrived home somehow late. It was already nighttime now. Even though I love going to new places, I don't think I'd go this far on my own without having a set intention or an event to visit, honestly. When I got home, it was just me alone for the rest of the evening. I wanted to do something productive but nothing much happened. I was able to clean the dishes that my sister hadn't washed for a few days and I threw out some of the food from the fridge. But yeah, I mostly spent my evening just chilling in front of the computer.

Song of the day: Rather Be (feat. Jess Glynne) by Clean Bandit

Lyrics that resonated with me:
If you gave me a chance, I would take it
It's a shot in the dark, but I'll make it

7 Years of Working!!!

Fri, 21 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

I can't believe it. Today was finally March 21st! I've never celebrated March 21st and I only settled on this date when I got my employment certificate from KVH, which solidified that my work experience did start on March 21st, 2018. Which means, I've been in the workforce for 7 years now!!! It's been a surreal 7 years, to be honest. After dropping out, I didn't expect to land a corporate job, much less to even get to where I am now. So when my first workday started at Makati, the city I've been dreaming of working in, I was so happy and grateful. Fast forward to now where I'm in Makati once again. It's been 7 years but I'm glad that I've made the right choices in life because I didn't stagnate and, well, here I am now as a senior at my profession. My day was just like any other day in the office. I mostly spent it on being busy, catching up on issues and fixing them. It was mostly nothing noteworthy aside from being late to lunch because I was waiting on the team to actually take their lunch break. Somehow, I've made it a habit of always sticking with them every lunch time. For the afternoon to the evening, nothing much went on aside from my usual work tasks. I took a break after completing a bunch of work to go to the nearby Starbucks and take a photo there. I posted an IG Story about my 7 years as a corporate worker and I just chilled to celebrate the day. Still, it was kind of disappointing that I left behind my tumbler because I didn't have any water to drink in the office. I just ordered extra cups of water just so I can feel more hydrated. When I went back to the office, a coworker offered me some fried enoki they got from Serenitea. I tried it and it was nice. I eventually bought some for myself and ate it in the office before I timed out for work. I messaged my sister and said that I'd be meeting her in BGC and I booked a ride there. I mostly sat and waited for my sister to arrive. She eventually just saw me waiting and we went to DataBlitz nearby to pick out keycaps for her, but she didn't really pick anything there. Next, we had dinner at Marugame Udon and I ordered the usual curry for me while my sister got a beef and rice bowl, we also ordered a few sides like tempura and that cheese hotdog stick that I like. Ailysh mostly asked me questions about how my work experience has been and what are the lessons that I've learned after being this long in corporate. I mostly gave her advice that she could use and I remember giving her a quote from Steve Jobs from his graduation speech about how our heart already knows where to go, we just need to follow it. She liked that and then we had to pack up our food for take-out. We stopped by Fully Booked and took a look at a few books there. We found Jessica's Shine and Bright and I thought about buying it, but we didn't buy it. My sister then found a Cinnamoroll art book in the Japanese manga section and, at first, I was shocked at the price because it was around 1,400 Pesos. But I decided that it was a gift I could give myself for having my 7th work anniversary, so I bought it. I took a photo with another book and posted it on my IG Story. My sister also bought 2 books for herself. After that, we booked a ride home and my sister pointed out that the book says that it was a coincidence that it was Cinnamoroll's 7th anniversary. I checked and **it was Cafe Cinnamon's 7th anniversary** when the book was published. That's such a crazy coincidence. I just celebrated my 7th anniversary of working and I come across a book that also celebrated another 7th anniversary. It was a nice coincidence and I posted that on my IG Story, too. I posted a lot of IG Stories today, weird. But then our Grab ride came to pick us up and we talked to the Grab driver while on the way home. His story was interesting because he was a parent of 2 kids and he also got cheated on while his spouse was in Singapore, but he was able to pay off a million Pesos of debt so that his children can study and he also owns multiple cars. It was really interesting because he made it despite all the challenges. I alluded to my sister that our Mom could've also done this and it was just in the mindset, so that was nice. For the rest of the evening, I just relaxed until I fell asleep.

Song of the day: Bring Me Back - Sped Up by Miles Away, Olivia Ridgely

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I've been
Running into you in my head
In between, what could've been, yeah, yeah
Everybody seems to leave
Bittersweet memories

Journal entry for Thursday, March 20th, 2025

Thu, 20 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Thursday was pretty busy as well and I was mostly engrossed in work. In the morning, I had a really weird dream wherein I was talking again with someone. She sent me a message and I remember being so happy that we were talking again. I tried my best to verify that it wasn't a dream and, somehow, I didn't believe it was. I eventually woke up and it was so disappointing. Nevertheless, I got ready for work. I took a while to get to the office in the morning. Getting there was a complete hassle but I was thankfully able to make it. I spent lunch with the team near me and their manager actually shocked me when he laid his hand to invite me for lunch with them. I didn't know that I'm still easily scared when someone taps me from the back, I thought I've grown from it. But I got shocked so much and he laughed at me. I also laughed as well because I was shocked so much. He asked me why I didn't notice him when he was just talking to his coworker beside me and I told him that I was glued to my screen. But after that, today was just your usual workday. I also had Starbucks in the afternoon and took a while to reflect on my situation. I also missed having a MacBook. After that, I went back to the office. Another higher-up approached me and they actually shocked me again! I was so startled even though they just called out my name. But they introduced themselves to me and told me to reach out to them if I have concerns with higher-level things. So that was nice. I was able to go home and have dinner just fine. I had some additional work to do in the evening but it was nothing I couldn't handle. At the end of the day, I noticed that tomorrow was March 21, which meant that I would've been in the Philippine workforce for 7 years then. I can't believe I have a total of 7 years of work experience. Wow, what a journey it has been.

Song of the day: Neverita by Bad Bunny

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Yo 'toy puesto pa' ti y tú te me quita'
Diablo, qué piquete la chamaquita
El corazón lo puso en la neverita
Dice que este verano se queda solita
Yo 'toy puesto pa' ti y tú te me quita'
Diablo, qué piquete la chamaquita
El corazón lo puso en la neverita
Dice que este verano se queda solita

Pero nunca sola, sola
Amores vienen y van, como las ola'
El DM explotao', to's le escriben "hola"
Una fila 'e cabrone' y yo quiero la cola, yeah, yeah, yeah

Journal entry for Wednesday, March 19th, 2025

Wed, 19 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I was pretty much busy today. I had a bit of rest and relaxation afterwards, though. I was also able to finally plot and start my goal of getting that MacBook. I miss having a Mac so much.

Song of the day: Game Over by Falling In Reverse

Lyrics that resonated with me:
My life is like a video game
Trying hard to beat the stage
All while I am still collecting coins

Journal entry for Tuesday, March 18th, 2025

Tue, 18 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Tuesday was like any other day. I mostly spent it at work and nothing really noteworthy went on. I just passed my usual time. After work, I made the decision to go to BGC so I could eat at Samgyupsalamat. I remembered that I would treat myself to *samgyup* once March rolled around and it was a thing I've been waiting on since February. I was able to commute there okay, I got seated, I just watched some music videos that played on the TV while eating. Sadly, it was mostly Twice music videos and it showed nothing from ILLIT or LE SSERAFIM. But it was fine, I noticed a few changes with regards to the setup of the tables. There's like a tower-rack-thing now where you could put the dishes on. And they apparently changed the grill design, too, which looked alright. I finished around 7 or so plates of beef? I lost count. But it's kind of a lot, to be honest, but it was good since I only ate breakfast today and had some of those Yakisoba noodles from yesterday. After that, I just had a bit of a walk alone to think and talk to myself about a few things like where my life should go, and all that stuff. I know I look like a total weirdo talking to myself in English while I'm outside. But I'm wearing earbuds so I guess it looks like I'm talking to someone on the phone. Maybe I should buy AirPods so it looks more realistic, but generally I didn't give a shit if people were looking at me or if people noticed that I was eating alone. I walked around a bit to buy some antacids because I know my stomach is going to act up later. I then made the usual, long trip to Starbucks on 32nd Street and just hung out there for a while. I also tried out their new strawberry mochi matcha drink, which was pretty nice. While I was here, I kind of missed having a MacBook here to code on or just browse the web with. I really missed those nights wherein I'd just bring the Mac and code/work outside. Since it was kind of disappointing, I just computed how long it would take me to save up for a MacBook and apparently it would be 6-7 months or so for the spec that I wanted. I generally agreed and booked a ride home. I got home safe, browsed IG, and talked to my sister for a bit. I also started out planning my upcoming expenses for the next month and it is a shocker. I even had to recalculate the time it'd take for me to save up for a MacBook. But it's fine, I promised myself that I'd get my own MacBook this year and I plan to achieve that goal.

Song of the day: So Cynical (Badum) by LE SSERAFIM

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I want your lo-lo-lo-loving
아닌 척 좀 그만하자
Wa-wa-wa-want it
서로가 원하잖아 That
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-dum
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-dum

A Sad-Happy Day

Mon, 17 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty boring. Time mostly passed by and I got to work. Thankfully, I was productive today so I'm glad my spirits were lifted a bit. I also watched the latest episode of Last Week Tonight, which was a fun watch. I also ate that spicy blue Yakisoba and I've missed it so much. It really hit the spot when I ate it. For the evening, nothing much else went on. I was just lonely and by myself. I opened Google Photos and read some old messages someone sent me in August 2024. We were in the middle of an argument and she asked me if I hated her, and I replied with “Nah haha” and basically said that I went above and beyond because I liked them and I saw a future with them. It was just sad that she told me that her heart really just wasn't there. Looking back, I didn't hate them, and I still don't to this day. In fact, I miss them on nights like these. I kept browsing Instagram and I saw a few comments like “I remember when my life was worth living” and it made me sadder. I kept scrolling and I checked Threads and I saw a thread about the pain of no contact and letting go. Crucially, they said this: > But if love was ever real, it would never require loss to prove it. So what is it you're actually grieving? > The hardest part of losing someone isn't their absence, it's the dismantling of the self you built around them. It made me reflect on things and, yeah, that's totally right. Most of my mood calendar entries revolved around them. I built my routine of staying up late with them. My daily “culture” was playing games, calling on Discord, and watching stuff with them. I'm still the same person that craves that kind of connection, especially with someone. And having withdrawals about it at this time of night hurts. I even went back to our conversation on my phone and it said that they had notifications silenced, and I thought about finally breaking no contact and reaching out. But the thread lastly said this: > You don't heal by erasing them, you heal by remembering yourself before them. Before you needed their validation to confirm what you should have known all along. I had a relatively-happy life before them. 2021 was my highlight. I had my own sense of routine, my own sense of culture. I watched so many scary horror movies alone, I was happy, I was anxiety-free. I think I need to start redefining who I am now and actually start the building process. I still made the same wish I make everyday to God that I hope I find the path I'm supposed to go.

Song of the day: Back for Good - Radio Mix by Take That

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Whatever I said, whatever I did I didn't mean it
I just want you back for good
(Want you back, want you back, want you back for good)
Whenever I'm wrong just tell me the song and I'll sing it
You'll be right and understood
(Want you back, want you back, want you back for good)
I want you back for good

A New Watch for Ailysh

Sun, 16 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I was really bored today and I stayed up very, very late because the matcha probably had some caffiene in it. I mostly just spent my time watching videos on Instagram and YouTube to fall asleep to. I didn't have much planned today, anyway, so it was fine for me to stay up late. I saw some really scary videos on IG and it honestly freaked me out because it was already around 3 a.m. by then. Thankfully, I was able to sleep a few hours later. When I woke up, I did my usual routine and planned to meet up with a seller for a Galaxy Watch. The hand-me-down I gave to my sister broke a few weeks ago and I wanted to buy her a new one. But that was planned for later in the afternoon. Since I was bored in the afternoon, I also worked on a feature for my website that shows a screenshot of the calendar entry page when linked and I got to work on it, and I made a plan to deploy it to my server. While I was debugging and figuring out the API, my sister's boyfriend arrived and we talked for a bit about my old graphics card and he also gave me a mango drink which was nice. I still had coffee leftover from yesterday so I was drinking 2 drinks at one time. Eventually, I had to leave and meet the Galaxy Watch seller. It's funny because we had a communication issue and it was an error on my part. I actually arrived at the wrong mall. When we found out the blunder, I thought he'd just give up on me but he just told me that he'll be at another mall later that day and I just asked to meet him there instead. Thankfully, he agreed and I booked a ride to the next mall. It actually was very far, surprisingly enough. I even passed by my office. It was **that far**. But I played a couple of K-Pop songs during the trip, notable Le Sserafim's “Hot” and some ILLIT songs. I eventually arrived after what seemed like an eternity and I was actually a bit paranoid about my safety. It was a new mall and I don't think I've been here before so I was on edge for a bit. Thankfully, the guy met me up with his family and he showed me the watch itself. It was a brand-new Galaxy Watch6 Classic. It was a black one and it looked so nice. I got it for only around 5.5K which was a total steal considering that this was a brand-new, never-been-opened watch and the one I had before was of an older version and it was already years old. This one was just 1 generation behind the current one and I can't believe I got it for this price. Anyway, I was glad to have gotten it and I booked a ride home. Thankfully, I arrived home safe and okay. I showed the watch to my sister and she was glad. I was shocked because the watch's screen was really bright. I checked the specs online and it had a better glass than my Apple Watch. I'm glad to have helped my sister get a brand-new watch of her own, though, since I remember her helping me get my watch on New Year's Day. But aside from that, I just ate dinner and spent some time setting up the new watch. After all that was done, it was nice to see the watch fully set up and ready. I mostly just cleaned up for the evening and finished working on that new API. All in all, today was a success. I managed to buy a brand-new watch at an unbelievable low price and I was able to deploy that new API I worked on for a few hours, which was really nice.

Song of the day: HOT by LE SSERAFIM

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'm burning HOT

내가 나로 살 수 있다면
재가 된대도 난 좋아
So tonight 안겨 네 품 안에
Bonnie and Clyde it oh

Journal entry for Saturday, March 15th, 2025

Sat, 15 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was the day I would meet up with Nathan, his mom, and Ane for dinner later at Chili's. Nothing much went on for most of the day, it was mostly just me catching up with mood calendar entries, testing out the new keyboard, updating some code and whatnot. It was pretty chill for most of the day. Around the late afternoon or so, I booked a ride to Chili's in One Bonifacio High Street and met up with Nate and his mom there. They already got nachos and I saw Nate wait for me by the escalator before we also came across Ane and us 3 went into the restaurant. The table was fairly short for my taste but we ordered food. The thing was, we actually ordered a lot of food. This was a concern not because of the price, but because the table was already full of food by the time they had served us everything. Still, the food was nice and I mostly caught up with Nate, his mom, and Ane about how my life was doing. They gave me advice out of concern, and boy did Nate and his mom sounded really concerned about me, but I assured them that I'm on the right track and I can save up some funds efficiently in the coming months. We also caught up with Ane and how her thesis is coming along. It was a shock because it was such an expensive thesis to make. We kept eating until we eventually were full after finishing a few dishes. It was nice to actually eat here because I've only heard about Chili's in American media, notably Hall Pass (2011). I tried out their chili rice and I knew it would be trouble for me because it was spicy, but I just didn't care and ate it anyway along with some spicy buffalo chicken. We had dessert and we took out some of the leftovers for ourselves. When, the bill came, it wasn't that surprising since it was thankfully around 6K and I had estimated the budget to be 5-7K for this evening, so we weren't far off. Afterwards, we walked outside for a bit and, apparently, an event was going on. It was BGC Coffee Fest and I was surprised but also sad because I can't drink coffee this late in the evening. It was already 9 p.m. or so by the time we went out so I was disappointed to not drink any coffee. We looked around the stalls and I expected to see some K-Pop booth there so I could buy another ILLIT album, but apparently there were none. I was also on the lookout for any of my friends here because I saw some of my friends post their IG Stories earlier about attending this event. I was hoping I'd “bump into” (see them for a mile away and “accidentally” bump into them) but I didn't see anyone that I know. I kept my eyes peeled the whole time and I was scanning hundreds of faces during our walk but I didn't recognize anyone. By the end, I just made the decision to order some strawberry matcha and this honey oat coffee, which Ane made fun of me for because she thinks matcha is for goats. Nate's mom also ordered something and stood in line with me. We got our drinks and we all had to go home. I showed them the Kuube bench, hoping to play some songs over Bluetooth, but it was already around 10:10 p.m. by then and the thing shuts down at exactly 10:00 p.m., which was a bummer. We all went our separate ways and I got some safe. I couldn't drink the honey oat coffee and I couldn't sleep easily, so I stayed up for the rest of the night.

Song of the day: Cherish (My Love) by ILLIT

Between the Past and Present

Fri, 14 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today was absolutely crazy and really, really awesome. It's been 1 month since I've left Dice but I'm starting to acclimate well to my new surroundings. Today was a day I had to go to the office and I played Girls' Generation's Genie EP. Listening to it was really, really cute. It brings me back to my time in high school where I would play Need For Speed: Shift on my PSP and just race while playing the entire Genie EP. I saw a Reddit comment that talked about Boyfriend and it made me miss that song since I haven't heard it in years or so. But commuting to work while playing the EP was so nostalgia-inducing. While I was going to the office, my final pay from Dice had been processed and I honestly couldn't believe it. It was such a relief because I was able to settle ALL of my outstanding credit card debt with it. Okay, maybe not all of it since my iPhone was still on installment, but I was able to clear all of the accrued debt I had from 2024 (from spending it all on food while staying up with someone, and other stuff). It was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. It put me in high spirits and I was able to book an upcoming event with it, as well as give back to my Mom and sister for supporting me this past Jan and Feb. I also had some food and coffee at Starbucks to help me feel better, also since I skipped breakfast today. Work went on as usual and I got to eat with the team I was with last week. We mostly joked around and they told me this thing that was viral in TikTok about a weird wedding where the bride scammed the event catering company and organizers, and the husband was under some love potion-trance-thing the whole time. Super weird story. We talked about it until we returned back to the office. I was pretty productive when I got back to work. I finished all of my pending tasks and I followed up on a few things. My shift eventually ended a few hours later. After work, I went to Glorietta to buy myself an ILLIT album (another I'LL LIKE YOU variant) and a new keyboard! I honestly couldn't believe it but I got a Cinnamoroll keyboard. It looks so girly compared to my black Corsair keyboard that I've had for 5 years. In my defense, my keyboard is honestly broken and it's been broken ever since I spilled coffee or water on it last year. I originally planned to get a PS5 buuuuttt I wanted the PS5 Pro and I didn't have money for that, so I just held it off and bought the keyboard. While I was buying the keyboard, Nicole sent a message in our Discord group and it was a pic of them, including Beni, at the Dice 10th year anniversary event. Nicole asked me to come there now and I wanted to book a ride. The ride there was quick and I was immediately at Seda BGC. I was welcomed by some of the associates at the floor entrance and, while I was late, I was able to find a seat at a table. The event was so sudden but I'm honestly glad I attended. Dice had a look back at some of their past events and I saw myself in the old pics. I also saw *someone* in some of the old pics and it kind of pulled on my heartstrings to see her face again. It made me feel a bit sad and lonely that I'm not able to tell her what happened today. She would've loved to see the ILLIT album and the Cinnamoroll keyboard. Oh well, whatever, I still watched the EVP and listened to Miss Jaana talk about how Dice has been and the presentations were also awesome. We ate some food and I was able to use that time to talk to some of my former coworkers. A lot of them were really shocked but also happy to see me. I greeted Miss Jaana and Sir Aldrich, and it was funny because I just saw the both of them last Sunday and Miss Jaana also pointed that out. After eating, they unveiled their plans for the next 10 years and it was a big plan to expand Dice. I'm honestly thrilled and happy for them. They also presented the new companies that would be under Dice by having a performance group do a light and smoke show and I was so amazed because I've never seen a dance performance with this much light. At the back of my head, I had a feeling of sadness as the award ceremony was going on and the people who have stayed for a long time at Dice were given this plaque. Had I just postponed my resignation to later this May (my would-be-6th year), I would be on that stage right now with my 5th-year plaque. But then I thought about my current circumstances and I'm happy to be where I am now. I've worked hard to get here and I made the right choice. I messaged this in our Discord group and Beni also believes that he made the right decision, as staying longer would make it harder and harder to leave. Ultimately, I put those worries aside and just enjoyed the present, and this night! They had a few more presentations and final remarks before ultimately having the live band sing songs as we partied amongst ourselves. I caught up with my former coworkers, greeted them, asked them how they're doing, how's the DevOps in Dice now that I'm gone, etc. I caught up, danced, sang my heart out. I also took many photos with my friends and coworkers, especially Dicey Memes and with Max. The party went on and I kept partying until the live band played their last song and the people that remained had started to pack up and leave. I booked a ride home and I got home fairly quick. My sister was shocked to see my new keyboard and I honestly couldn't believe this day. March has been such a blessing and I was able to go above and beyond this week. I think I said it right when I said that March was just filled with blessings for me. Ultimately, I'm happy of where I am in life and how I ended up here. While I may miss the past every now and again, I am happier here, today.

Song of the day: Danza Kuduro by Don Omar

Meet the Team!

Thu, 13 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was the day that I would be going to the office to meet my team. I woke up so early and I feel like my sleep wasn't enough, but whatever, I'll just “wing it” today. Surprisingly, I got there relatively early. I honestly thought that getting there would be a total bloodbath and I'd be extremely late, but apparently it wasn't that bad once I actually booked a ride. I was actually early. The whole “looking for a ride” part was honestly more stressful than the ride itself just by it's uncertainty but I had just let it slide since I'll only go here every once in a while. Once I got to the office, my teammate found me and I got to meet the team. They were really nice and they also had a friend that tagged along in our booth. I was mostly productive, trying to help them in any way that I can while also doing the task I had been assigned since Wednesday. We worked our morning shift and it was quickly time for lunch. When we went out for lunch, it was so hot outside. My teammates' friend and I were talking and they told me that they had actually seen my website before. I was so shocked because I honestly thought that they haven't seen it yet. They have yet to talk to me about it or remarked on it, so that was kind of shocking but also flattering since they thought that my GitHub profile was cool. We ate at restaurant nearby and we talked about various things like life, work, how their careers have been at the company, and I also got to talk about myself and my experiences. We had a pretty good lunch but the *sisig* I ordered was so spicy, I was sweating bullets. Eventually, we were done with our lunch and we talked while on our way back to the office. We talked about that controversy at the airport where the airport employees had planted bullets onto a passenger's bag to extort them. Scary stuff. We went back to the office and things were still pretty productive between us. I eventually figured out how to finish this task that I was given and I passed it off for checking. After that, I was basically done for work and eventually left. I booked a ride to Dice's office because I had to get my final pay and other exit documents from them. I had a couple things signed, too. Getting there was a pain in the ass, though, literally. It was such a long motorcycle ride there and my thighs and butt were sore from sitting. I booked a ride to my house after making sure the documents are correct and that I had everything I needed. I got home relatively late-ish and had dinner late, too. But all in all, today was really good and I felt really productive. I achieved everything I set out to accomplish today, and more! So that's pretty great in my books.

Song of the day: Bang Bang (feat. Adam Levine) by K'NAAN

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Then she aimed for my chest with love in her eye
Said she aimed for my chest with love in her eye

She was walkin' around with a loaded shotgun
Ready to fire me a hot one
It went bang, bang, bang, straight through my heart
(Straight through my heart)
Although I could have walked away
I stood my ground and let her spray, ooh
She shot me, she shot me
Bang, bang, she shot me
She shot me, she shot me
Bang, bang, she shot me
She shot me, she shot me
Bang, bang, she shot me
She shot me, she shot me
Bang, bang

Scorpion, she's so hot she's a scorch-ian
Killing me softly: Lauryn or Kevorkian
Couldn't tell if she's cuckoo or quirky, when
I asked her her name and she said, "Call me Ten"
Testing, testing
Things just got more interesting
She's dressed in a vest pin, double-breasted holster
A very Western toaster
She ain't nothing Kosher
Ah, she lets me closer
Hotter than a pepper-crusted Samosa
While I try to keep my composure

Journal entry for Wednesday, March 12th, 2025

Wed, 12 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Nothing much happened today. Work went on as usual but I was very productive today. I believe I helped out a lot, which felt nice. I also got my Apple Watch Blue Cloud Sport Loop today, which got delivered way earlier than expected. I got to wear it and my Apple Watch looks so nice now. I picked the right watch band because this looks sick. Also, I was able to somehow capture an earthworm and I placed it into Mom's pot that had her *kalamansi* plant. After work, since I was looking to de-stress, I went out to BGC alone and walked for a bit. I eventually went to the Kuube bench and played some ILLIT songs. Since I didn't want to walk to 31st Street, I just went to the new Starbucks nearby and ordered something light for the evening since it was past 9 already. I mostly just caught up on my mood calendar entries while I was there. Times like this made me miss my MacBook because I would just code or write things while at Starbucks. It just made me want to buy a MacBook real soon so I can go out and code again. After a while, I eventually got tired and booked a ride home. The rider I got had a beast of a motorcycle and I was honestly impressed. I got home fine and things were okay. I continued writing so that I could publish all my past entries tonight.

Song of the day: Forever by BABYMONSTER

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Baby, it was all a dream, you thought I was yours
멋대로 착각하지는 마
It's bitter, it's sweet (oh), 저 하늘 높이
I'm spreading my wings like I'ma live
Forever (forever-ever-ever)
Forever (forever, forever, forever-ever-ever)
Forever
Like I'm gonna live, like I'm gonna live forever

Journal entry for Tuesday, March 11th, 2025

Tue, 11 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Things mostly went back to normal today. My morning started off boring and I breezed through the tasks I had at work. Nothing much happened aside from me still being worried for my sister, but that was the full extent of it. When my sister finally arrived, things were okay and she lied next to me and said she was okay now. I also called Mom after that and I helped my sister build her new rack to hold her bags. I also ordered dinner late and I gave my sister *crema de leche* while I had *chicken inasal* for dinner. I eventually slept after that.

Song of the day: Swan Song by LE SSERAFIM

Lyrics that resonated with me:
이 노랠 부르면
Blah, blah, blah 또 뭐라 하겠지
Shut up, watch me kill this
Shining like a diamond, sing it

Journal entry for Monday, March 10th, 2025

Mon, 10 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad

There are some days that aren't worth writing about and there are also some days I SHOULDN'T be writing about. Today was supposedly a normal day but it almost could've ended up in a disaster. My day continued as normal and work was also usual. But things got worse after work. I was so rocked. It felt like my mental health would collapse but I had to keep it together because I had a meeting late at night. This was honestly on the grounds for a deeply traumatic event and I'm just extremely sad that no one's here to look out for *my* mental health, even though I always try to be there for others. I'm the counselor and I try to help the mental health of others, especially with someone, but damn I just realized that no one is here for me. To reduce whatever trauma I got from this, I just ordered anything to make me feel better and things were mostly calm and okay by the evening. Earlier, I was thinking that if I was selfish and didn't do anything, I would be on a different timeline and I am fucking glad to be on this side of the timeline.

Song of the day: Swan Song by LE SSERAFIM

Afternoon Visit to Makati

Sun, 09 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty chill. I mostly relaxed for the morning and I didn't have anything else planned other than to leave for Greenbelt with my sister. By afternoon, we eventually commuted there and we commuted separately. My Mom tried calling me while I was commuting, which annoyed me because I didn't want my phone getting snatched while on the road. I eventually arrived at Greenbelt and we worked out something so that she won't call me while I'm on the road commuting. After that, I met up with my sister who had gone inside the church to pray for a bit. While talking to her, I was fiddling with this small keychain that I had. I had stuck the ILLIT keychain to my keys here and I was trying to work out how to show it on my phone without damaging it. I tried various configurations and I accompanied my sister in withdrawing money. After she withdrew from the ATM, I passed by a family that looked a bit familiar. It turned out to be the CTO and CEO of Dice205, my former boss and his wife, and I was so shocked to actually come across them. My mind was boggled because I honestly thought that the odds of coming across someone I know are small and this was such a serendipitous event. We talked for a bit and I pointed to the office where I worked at and then they told me to keep in touch. I said that it was nice to meet them and we continued walking to Manam. I was honestly still shocked. I am always shocked to be out in public and come across a person that I knew. Anyway, we just ate at Manam. We then had to walk to SM Makati to buy groceries. So after we arrived to SM Makati, I was focused on just buying the groceries that we needed. I believe we got everything so we checked out and I also bought that Samanco ice cream fish that I love. We took a while in checking out the groceries and the lady in front of us took a long time. But after we got our groceries, I booked a Grab ride and we got home relatively early. I just chilled for the evening and nothing much happened aside from my sister's boyfriend coming over and I gave him the broken GTX 1080 Ti that I had. I just spent time on my phone for the remainder of the evening.

Song of the day: Cold Heart - PNAU Remix by Elton John, Dua Lipa, PNAU

Baguettes 🥖

Sat, 08 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was the day I get to hang out with Max and Meryll! The thing is, I woke up rather late and it was my fault. I had actually woken up at around 8 a.m., but for some reason I turned off my alarm and then woke up at 10:40 or so. This is bad because we were supposed to meet up at 10:00 already because we had to go to Patt's Putts. I took a while in getting ready and booking a ride, too. What's worse is that it actually started to rain while I was on the road, and the driver that I was with smelled like B.O. and it was super horrible. I'm glad I got to douse myself in perfume beforehand but damn, it was just bad. We thankfully put on raincoats when we reached the bridge near Market! Market! and that helped with the smell, thankfully. The rain also lessened by the time I got to Shangri-La Plaza. The mall was so big and I don't remember visiting this mall that much. The interior looked so large and confusing, but eventually I met up with Meryll and Max, and Max smacked me in the head for being so late. But we walked around for a bit and then found a hotpot restaurant that they wanted to eat at. I asked us for a seat and I sat across Meryll and Max sat next to Meryll. Our hotpot order finally arrived and I guided them how to cook food in a hotpot, even though I've never used one myself and I only watched videos on Instagram about it. But they quickly got the hang of it and we just talked about various life things and events while eating. I also spilled tea about what happened with my life and other things. We eventually finished eating and paid the bill, after that we walked around to withdraw cash and I ordered some doughnuts. We sat near the donut shop for a while and we just talked about other things. After that, I bought an ILLIT album that I thought just had photocards, but it even had a mini CD inside! Max bought a Seventeen album. We took some photos at Life Four Cuts like last time and I felt better about my hair this time. But after taking the photo, Meryll made fun of me because I looked like an old man, which I admit, I kinda did look old. We went downstairs and accompanied Max while she had her watch repaired. Once that was done, we went to Patt's Putts to play some mini golf. I have never played mini golf in real life before, but apparently I did well, initially. I kept getting a whole in one while Max and Meryll struggled a bit. We kept playing and followed the usual flow of the courses, we even took pictures while playing mini golf. But it was oddly hot inside and we had to take a breather because it was exhausting. We kept playing for more rounds and I kept messing up my shots because it was hot and I was wearing my usual baggy clothes (and hat) which added to the heat. We finished playing the whole 27 rounds and sat down to tally the scores. To everyone's surprise, Max actually won, Meryll was the second, and I was last. This actually shocked everyone because they both thought that I was going to be first place, but I kind of knew that I'm not the first since I messed up a lot of shots on the 21st and 22nd hole. Still, I was shocked to come in dead last despite such a good start. Since we were done, we just went to our last stop today which was the Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf restaurant that was nearby. We ordered some food and I initially just ordered a drink. I was surprised that this was more like a restaurant with servers giving out the menus to the tables and I felt like a total dweeb for ordering by myself at the cashier. But regardless, I also ordered some food and I unboxed the ILLIT album while waiting, Max also opened her Seventeen album as well. We got our food, talked, and eventually Meryll's boyfriend arrives. Max and I ask him some questions since it was our first time meeting him and he was aight. I went to the bathroom and got scared because the stall closed fully and it was almost pitch black inside. I've been having scary dreams recently and I got spooked. I told everyone about it and they initially didn't believe me, but as we left, we visited the bathroom again and Meryll's boyfriend got to see how dark it was inside. We all talked for a bit and I get further spooked because I have a fear of being stuck in a mall that's closed, and they escort me to some part of the mall. My Angkas ride eventually arrives and I am just confused by the mall's layout. He made me cancel and I just rebooked. But I was able to find a ride quickly and I went home. The rider had run out of gas so we had a little side quest and I showed him the various gas stations nearby and he eventually was able to get gas. I got home safe and I mostly rested for the night.

This Is My Life Now

Fri, 07 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I thought March 7 would be a celebratory day for me. Well, it was, but for an entirely different reason. I slept a little later today, mostly because I went home late last night and I also ate late, so that's that. I was able to sleep around midnight and started having some really weird dreams. Thankfully, it was all just nonsense and not pure horror like yesterday's was. After that, I was done from work and went outside to walk and clear my mind for a bit. As I was walking, I looked at the people around me and played some music. It was kind of cinematic, like I was in some kind of movie. This is the day where it finally sunk in: this is my life now. This is where I am. I am not in the past, I am not an employee of Dice. I am here and now in the next chapter of my life's journey, and I honestly couldn't believe it. But I'm glad I'm here, I'm grateful. This is where I needed to be at 26 and this is where I imagined adult me would be, except maybe a little thinner and more muscular, but I'll get there. Since it was the end of the week, I decided to celebrate it. I ate at Ramen Nagi even though it was against my ideal meal because of my gout. I even got a flare up before from Ramen Nagi, but hopefully I can manage. I just read stories on Reddit the whole time I was there and ate alone. I took a photo but decided against posting it. I also looked forward to seeing Max and Meryll tomorrow, so that's nice. I left with a smile and I was able to book a ride so easily. My trip home wasn't hell either, despite it being a Friday. At the end of the day, I just relaxed, browsed Reddit, talked to my sister and Milktea.

Song of the day: Baby It's Both (Tick-Tack English Ver.) (Feat. Ava Max) by ILLIT

Journal entry for Thursday, March 6th, 2025

Thu, 06 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I went to the office today and it'd be the first time I would be back since I got sprained. To be honest, my foot still feels sore and putting it on the ground to walk makes my foot hurt. But whatever, it is what it is. I got settled at my designated station and I began to go through my usual work routine. I was introduced to the people that I would sit near with and who were the former teammates of my current teammates. Then work got on and they invited me for lunch with them. I got to talk to them for a while and I noticed that one of them was using a RedMagic phone, but it was a complete guess and I only saw it for a second. I pointed it out and I got it right, which shocked me because I didn't know that I was that good in identifying phones. But we eventually got seated and I got the ribeye steak from Farmery. It was really good but also against my gout, but I'll let this one slide. After that, we went back to the office and work continued as usual. Nothing much happened in the evening and I timed out on time. I booked a ride home and I also happy that the driver took a better path that goes through BGC which saves a ridiculous amount of time since we don't have to go through SLEX anymore. I got home and just chilled for the night.

Song of the day: Off The Record by IVE

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Off the record night
This late night conversation
멈추지 않아
No more time, no more kill my vibe
This late night conversation
잠들지 않아

Journal entry for Wednesday, March 5th, 2025

Wed, 05 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I've finally made it to March 5th. It was a slow crawl getting to this day, but I finally made it. I was able to go back to sleep after waking up and my day progressed as usual. I was more productive today, mostly because my spirits are a lot lifted and I could kind of walk again. I still had to look after Milktea and it was a bit stressful, but he slept through most parts of the day. I also got Milktea all of his essentials and he was able to eat wet cat food. Work eventually ended and my evening began. Nothing much went on. I got to talk to Mom as well as my cousin and Nathan. I told him I looked forward to seeing him and Ane next week instead because I'm booked this weekend. We had a plan to go out to Chili's, so that's nice. It was also nice of Nathan to check up on me randomly and ask me how I'm doing, it shows that he's really more of a friend than anything. After that, I started to unwind for the day, cleaning up things and getting things ready for tomorrow. Earlier, I was deciding whether or not to leave for BGC or McKinley Hill, but I couldn't since it's already too late in the evening. I was able to sleep shortly afterward.

Song of the day: I'LL LIKE YOU by ILLIT

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Alright, alright, okay, okay (Okay)

Journal entry for Tuesday, March 4th, 2025

Tue, 04 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much really happened today. I had to keep Milktea on the upper floor of the house and he kept trying to escape, which was annoying. My sister also arrived pretty frustrated which kind of ruined the day but I was able to offset it by completing work on that now playing widget for my site. All in all, today was pretty boring and forgettable.

Song of the day: Baby It's Both (Tick-Tack English Ver.) (Feat. Ava Max) by ILLIT

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Saying I'll run, run, run
Saying we're done, done, done
But missin' you when I'm all alone
Oh, oh my God
Wanna just hold you tight
Wanna just say goodbye
Don't know why I'm like this, oh

Oh, you wanna make me scream
You're so good at that
Wanna pull you close
And then push you right back
When you're kissing me
Oh, you drive me mad
Head and heart's at war
I'm down bad

Journal entry for Monday, March 3rd, 2025

Mon, 03 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was surprisingly chill again today. I mostly minded my own business and focused on important things since it's the start of the week. I was also very productive today, so that's good. At the end of the day, I had some free time but it felt lacking, for some reason. It's like I didn't do enough things with my free time, but I guess it is what it is. I just watched some prank videos before going to sleep.

Song of the day: Pimple by ILLIT

Lyrics that resonated with me:
숨길수록 커져가는 pimple, babe, you know I love it
꾹 참기 싫어 그냥 다 너에게 보여줄래
My lovely pimple, baby, baby
그만큼 너를 좋아해, 가까워지고 싶어

Journal entry for Sunday, March 2nd, 2025

Sun, 02 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I felt so stressed and pressured in the early day, it felt like I was at the tipping point. I felt really horrible because of my current circumstances so I just tried to write it all out to acknowledge it. I actually cried a lot while writing because I looked back at the past, but ultimately I ended up writing something great and I was able to sleep shortly afterward. I woke up at around noon and I just talked to a few people, mainly Baguettes and we talked about our own upcoming Boracay trips. After that, I did my own thing for the afternoon and evening. I spent most of it catching up and cleaning out my work details, organized a few things here and there, but I mostly just relaxed by myself. I wanted to be off social media today but I couldn't disappear today, exactly. I just planned to vanish for the following week so I can further rest. Overall, I'm glad to have written out what I felt and things today looked way better because I just focused on myself. I'm going to keep doing that from now on.

Song of the day: You Can Call Me Al by Paul Simon

Yikes

Sat, 01 Mar 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

I finally caught up with my mood calendar entries today and it's been good. I think I'm all caught up with the tasks that I want to do. I stood up late, though, eventually sleeping at 4 a.m. or something and then waking up at 11. I was mostly bored around noon but I saw an IG Reels video of a photo booth website that was deployed in Vercel. When I checked it, the deployment was paused and it didn't really work. I figured that this was an easy-ish project to do and I believed I could make it in Angular. I spent the whole afternoon up until evening making it and I actually got very far, which was impressive. There are a lot of features left to implement, but I was able to make a proof of concept in **less than 4 hours**, complete with image capturing, a basic overlay system, and a photoreel. I posted my progress on IG and I felt great about it, but I also felt stressed out which I'm trying to avoid. I used an old photo of me and my sister (which was in the same set of photos as my current pfp) as a test image. Then some girl messages me and asks me who that girl in the photo is. It was a super weird and strange question because we weren't dating and we aren't in a talking stage. I'm pretty sure that they asked because they thought my sister was my girlfriend. They eventually admitted that they asked because she thought that my sister was my secret girlfriend or whatever. This girl **who I'm not dating/flirting with**, and says she has moved on from me, felt the need to ask if I had a girlfriend. Eugh, here we go again. And that's kind of disgusting, to be honest. It kind of ruined my mood. It reminded me of how toxic the idea of “situationships” can be and I'm a little disgusted at myself because I think I found myself in another situationship again. Weird possessiveness without clarity! It's so weird that yet another girl would try to be cautious of the people I take photos with and ask questions when I'm happily single, and I'm not looking for romance (or, at least, not with anyone else). It's also kind of a slap to the face because I don't want to be asked “who's this girl” by some girl I'm not even in a relationship with. That feeling of weird disgust compounded with my existing mental stress and I just shut down for the night. I stopped coding. I felt like I was going to have a mental breakdown. I have no friends to vent to, no one else to calm my mind with, I don't even have *someone* with me right now. I just watched our old Sky game recordings and I wanted to cry because I miss having someone. I missed playing Sky with someone and just having that be the highlight of my day. I feel like I'm at a weird place in my life and I just feel so lonely. I also watched videos of me playing with the RC and I missed them as well. I miss having safe spaces and feeling secure in the people that I had instead of these weird new relationships that may or may not be laced with “romance.” Eugh. I blatantly called the girl out for asking me that weird question because she shouldn't care if I already had a gf or not. We're not dating. I'm not dating anyone, and I'm certainly not interested in liking people who get suspicious of my own sibling. It's pretty obvious that they don't actually care about me or my life. If they did, they would've already known my history. They would've asked me about my siblings, who they were, and what my relationship is with them. But no, this is just another one those stupid and fake infatuations that's shallow as shit and it comes with side effects like jealousy or distrust. These people don't even know who I am, but God forbid I take a photo with another girl. What? Who do they think they are? I'm so sick and tired of getting these toxic infatuations, jeez. I really miss having friends. Days like this make me really think if the path in life I chose was correct, or maybe I should've stayed with someone and gaslit myself to keep on going. I was able to keep on going for 2 years anyway. The latter is seriously tempting. How much stress do I have to fucking endure? Can't I just get a damn break? I'm so tired. For what it's worth, at least, I was able to be extremely productive, so today's not really that bad of a day as it sounds.

Song of the day: See You Again (feat. Charlie Puth) by Wiz Khalifa, Charlie Puth

Lyrics that resonated with me:
It's been a long day
Without you, my friend
And I'll tell you all about it when I see you again

Journal entry for Friday, February 28th, 2025

Fri, 28 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty much a usual, chill Friday. I couldn't sleep throughout the night and I thought I made a new friend, but it didn't really work out after our small talk ended. I woke up feeling like hell because I only slept for around 4 hours, and I really thought to myself how I was able to survive on only this much sleep 1 year ago. I also talked to a few friends in the early morning, notably Nathan who I admitted that I was having financial difficulties and he offered to help me by giving a loan, which I declined. I appreciate the gesture a lot because I wasn't asking for help, but I felt how sincere he was in helping me. I tried to sleep afterwards. Work started and ended as usual, with things turning out well. After work, I was able to fully list down all of my accomplishments and tasks on my previous job.I talked to a few friends as well, which made the day a bit better. I wanted to post new pictures on Instagram but I couldn't find a cohesive color and 3 good photos to post, so I held off on the idea. I also got interested in a YouTuber named First Person Life/Nman Gaming. But after all that, nothing else went on and I stayed up to enjoy my Friday.

Song of the day: blue by yung kai

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'll trust the universe will always bring me to you

Journal entry for Thursday, February 27th, 2025

Thu, 27 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much happened today, this came and passed by. I talked to a few people, but it was mostly meh.

Song of the day: Sh-Boom by The Chords

Journal entry for Wednesday, February 26th, 2025

Wed, 26 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad

I really felt like shit today. I woke up from yet another dream about talking again with someone and then not seeing them anymore. It was really sad. It kind of ruined my morning and this sprain isn't helping. It just compounded with the fact that I don't have any friends right now who I can free talk or vent to. I felt so alone today. Work passed by as usual and nothing else happened. During my free time in the evening, I looked back at some of our old recordings and I heard their voice again in months. I cried when I remembered that they would just randomly sing or say something weird and their mannerisms were kind of like mine. I cried a lot because I miss them so much. I did my best to calm myself down and reassure myself that I'll find someone better, but days like these made me just miss having someone to spend the entire day with.

Journal entry for Tuesday, February 25th, 2025

Tue, 25 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy really went on today. I spent some time with Milktea in my room, but after that, he left me alone and the day was pretty boring.

Song of the day: Thinking Of You - Acoustic Version by Katy Perry

Journal entry for Monday, February 24th, 2025

Mon, 24 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Monday was pretty lame. It was the first full day where I was injured and my foot was still sprained. I had a lot of anxieties today that were all quelled by the end of the day. I'm a bit glad that it didn't turn out as horribly as I had it in my head.

Song of the day: Who's Holding Donna Now? by Rhythm Of The Night

First Sprain in Almost 2 Years

Sun, 23 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Bad

I went home safe and feeling very bloated from our night in Poblacion. Personally, I don't like drinking that much and it's been months since I drank an alcoholic beverage. I couldn't sleep properly, too, since I was burping like hell. I really wondered how this would fare with my gout and hyperacidity, but I just took a Kremil-S before sleeping. Sunday was supposed to be a day where I'd go out and exercise, which initially felt good because I would lose some of the calories I gained earlier morning. I would be walking my usual trail with my sister and her boyfriend would be tagging along. I was also extra cautious of my steps because last time, my heel rolled itself, but it didn't turn out bad. As we passed Bayani Road, I thought it would be safe since the trail would be generally smooth from here on out at Lawton Ave. A few minutes in, as I was unfocused and adjusting my music, I tripped on a recessed part of the concrete which had a manhole on it, and I rolled my ankle pretty bad. I instantly knew I was a goner because it was not *just* a simple ankle roll, it **rolled hard** and putting my foot down hurt like hell. I hard trouble getting on the Angkas ride home, but my sister and her boyfriend assisted me. What annoyed me was that the Angkas driver dropped me off a bit far from my house, and it was the furthest I've ever been dropped off. I walked home and a lot of people noticed that I was injured, which seemed pretty weird because they knew my nickname even though I didn't know theirs. It was a grueling march towards my bed but I was successful and propped up my foot on some pillows. My uncle also came in and was kind enough to lend me his family's ice pack. But I still felt like crap. I mostly just browsed IG Reels and passed my time on my phone with my foot propped up. In the evening, my sister gave me dinner and she actually broke the ice pack by twisting it incorrectly and the top couldn't be sealed anymore. This just made things really horrible for me because all the ice had melted and I couldn't ice my sprain properly. I fucking hate how horrible and tragic this day went and I have anxiety from suffering a sprain this early in my new job. I cannot stress how fucking bullshit this day was.

Song of the day: No Celestial by LE SSERAFIM

GLLIT Confirmed

Sat, 22 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Saturday was kind of weird. I stayed up all night playing a game which was alright, I guess. It wasn't that exciting nor thrilling and I wasn't that engrossed in it, but it burned a big chunk of my time early in the day. I had a hard time sleeping afterwards and it was already 5 a.m. when I got to sleep. I woke up at around noon and things progressed as you'd expect. I did my morning routine, I was able to grab food. Come afternoon, I was working hard on this fix to Dockerize my website and essentially refactor the code for Dockerization. It was actually a grueling process because the container builds kept failing and I was slightly going mad at 3 hours into fixing it. But I was thankfully able to pinpoint the bug and write a workaround for it in my JS Docker file. In the afternoon, Tiffany sent me her *pasalubong* from Korea. It had some good chocolate snacks and I easily ate them throughout the afternoon. But what really surprised me was that they gave me official photocards of **ILLIT**. I could not believe it!!!! ILLIT! They actually gave me ILLIT photocards. I talked to Tiffany after posting my IG Story and they said they were choosing between ILLIT or aespa, and they chose the former because they remembered that I had an ILLIT song stuck in my head. I told Tiffany that ILLIT was the girl group I loved on my own and, in a way, symbolized me moving on from past things because I grew to like ILLIT on my own. What's also heartwarming was that Tiffany even covered for the shipping of her free gift. It was really, really, heartwarming and it solidified my stance on making ILLIT my main girl group now. I decided on a favorite member after, Moka, and set her as my wallpaper. After that, I also cleaned up some plates and cleaned some parts by the house. By 7 p.m. or so, I was done and I felt really productive. All of the sudden, a coworker invited me to go out with him in Poblacion. I had nothing to do, so I just went for it and went out to bars with him. We mostly drank, talked about life, discussed work, and then he told me that he was impressed by my achievements because I sounded like I had so much life experience than him, who's already 30. We enjoyed the rest of the night by going to various bars. What's also weird is that a person from the past came back to message me. We followed each other back and began messaging. I was talking to them as my coworker and I were outside. The first one being Las Tapas. I requested that they play "Magbalik" by Callalily and they performed it, which was nice. I drank a few bottles of San Mig Light Apple which kind of threw me off a bit since I haven't drank beer in years. But I was still okay, we walked around to find other places to drink and talk at. By the end of the night, we were at Jose Cuervo Cantina at Poblacion and we were just chilling to some songs by a few performers. It was nice of them to treat me to this night out because I honestly didn't have enough money to pay for anything here.

Song of the day: Magbalik by Callalily

Journal entry for Friday, February 21st, 2025

Fri, 21 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Friday was pretty chill. So this is what my Fridays would look like from now on. It was pretty peaceful, but also boring since nothing much went on. I just tried to find a game to play to pass the time because I was so bored.

Song of the day: It Wasn't Me by Shaggy, Rik Rok

Journal entry for Thursday, February 20th, 2025

Thu, 20 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Song of the day: Bumalik Ka Na Sa'kin by Silent Sanctuary

Journal entry for Wednesday, February 19th, 2025

Wed, 19 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today but I worked from home and I was able to meet the other members of my team, which was pretty nice. Work continued after our meeting and I eventually timed out. I noticed that I timed out a lot later than in my previous work, and I'm still getting used to this new schedule. But all in all, today was pretty good.

Song of the day: Bumalik Ka Na Sa'kin by Silent Sanctuary

New Map Unlocked

Tue, 18 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

I actually didn't know whether or not I would go out to the office today, but I took a chance and actually went there myself. Seeing the other office was something really special. I would be working here for (hopefully) the next few years and this would be where my new life would revolve around. I'm pretty happy to be here and I spent most of my time setting things up and getting to know the area.

Song of the day: Angeleyes by ABBA

Day One of a New Chapter

Mon, 17 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today is the day. Today is **literally** the day. I have talked about this for months ago: a new chapter of my life. A fresh start. A new beginning. New people, new experiences, new places. The soundtrack is different, I have a shaved head, I'm fully single and free, and today is my first day at my new job. Today is the start of a new chapter and, wow, this is what it feels like. My day started off early. Since I slept around 11 p.m. last night, I was able to wake up at 7 a.m. feeling okay. I had my food from last night microwaved as my breakfast and I was starting to panic slightly as the clock was ticking past 8. I ate my food, got one of the best clothes I have, and I was thankful to have a rider accommodate my booking and we were off. This time, I'm going to a place I have never worked at before. I listened to hype songs throughout the trip, especially Crazy by Le Sserafim. I eventually arrived at the building and it was insane. I had never been here before and this beginning was starting to look up. Eventually, I get to the office and get my new hire kit. I waited for orientation to start in a room with fellow new hires and the feeling was interesting. It felt like I had just transferred to a new school and I was put in a room with fellow transferees. This is exactly how my first day of college was. Everyone was new, this was their first time being here, and no one knew each other. I love this feeling and I'm just excited to be here. Eventually, orientation starts and we all get to know each other better. In the afternoon, the orientation ended and we all got our company devices. I use the time to catch up with the people I've befriended today. The others just go home since the day was already over anyway. I booked a ride home and I just looked out at the window, for the most part. I am in pure disbelief that I had just gone through this day and things were just nice. When I got home, I just didn't do anything and let it fully sink in. I also played with Milktea for a bit and then waited for my sister to arrive. We ordered take-out since it was my first day and we watched some episodes of Hell's Kitchen together. I also got to talk to a few friends, Naomi asked me about my first day and I'm still glad I got to give updates to my friends in Dicey Memes. I also talked to Max today, which is always nice. At the end, I got to talk to Mom and my sister as well about our goal by the end of the year. All in all, I'm personally glad to have this new start. I keep circling back to this song because it says that life and the show goes on. I thought, back then, that leaving everything behind would herald the end of my life and it'd go bad or something. To be fair, it did end my life. It ended that *chapter* of my life. But honestly, no. I'm still here. I'm still moving forward. And I have my full attention and energy into this. No distractions, nothing holding me back. And I'm ready to face whatever set of challenges this new chapter of my life brings.

Song of the day: The Show Goes On by Lupe Fiasco

Lyrics that resonated with me:
All night, 'til the morning we dream so long
Anybody ever wonder, when they would see the sun up
Just remember when you come up, the show goes on
Alright, already, the show goes on

Journal Entry 777

Sun, 16 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much went on today. This was my usual Sunday. I spent the day at home, I watched YouTube vids, I played some Clash of Clans throughout the day. For the morning, I had breakfast with my sister and we got McDonald's and we had Mang Inasal for lunch a bit later. My sister was going to go out with her boyfriend and his family today and invited me to tag along but I declined and stayed at home. I also had a dream about *someone* in the morning and I just remember us talking on a field of grass. The only unusual thing that happened today was that I got involved in an argument and it reminded me that I'm still hurt over my past. It opened a wound that I warned people about and yet they still made that joke. I really didn't like it and it gave me the ick. I gave some thought about continuing to talk to this person and I'm going to give it up the next time they say something off. I don't like having my peace disturbed right now or my mood ruined by other people. Thankfully, I got to talk to a few friends like Max and Belle. I talked about upcoming plans with Max and we talked about what to do this year and I suggested we do that trip to Elyu. After that, I waited a bit longer and then went to the barbershop to have my hair cut. I guess I'm sticking to the semi-bald look now. I went home and tried to have take-out for dinner, but it honestly took so long. The first order took an hour and it still didn't arrive. The second order was successful, but, by the time it arrived, it was already 9 p.m. and wayyy past my eating window. I still ate, though, and left some for breakfast tomorrow. Nothing much went on after that aside from me talking to myself and giving myself a pep talk about tomorrow and giving advice, once again, to move on. Part of me is still apparently hurt. It was all well and good after that, though, and I was able to sleep okay at around midnight. My 777th entry sounds like an average day, and it was, and I guess that's how my life works right now.

Song of the day: Lovefool by The Cardigans

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Lately I have desperately pondered
Spent my nights awake and I wonder
What I could have done in another way
To make you stay
Reason will not reach a solution
I will end up lost in confusion
I don't care if you really care
As long as you don't go

Journal entry for Saturday, February 15th, 2025

Sat, 15 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

My Saturday was pretty tame. I thought about going outside today and just decided to push through it. I watched a YouTube video that talked about the new Captain America film and I just said “fuck it” and decided to book a ticket afterwards. Mom also called and I was able to FaceTime with her and my sister joined me and we both talked to Mom for a bit then I got ready to leave. Unfortunately, I had trouble booking a ride to Venice Grand Canal. It was so bad. It's 30 minutes before my movie starts, I was still at home even though I should be there by now. But no, I had trouble booking. I eventually got a ride, though, and they arrived pretty quickly. I was late to enter the theaters and I wasn't even able to present my ticket slip to anyone. I was surprised that there was no security to check the theater, either. I stood inside the movie theater for a bit and stood in the isle like an idiot. I forgot my seat number and the Internet connection inside was trash, but I remembered that I took a screenshot and found my seat immediately. I was surprised that there was a Captain America pillow there, though. I didn't expect this cool freebie. This looks awesome. I'm also glad that my seat also had popcorn and drinks, despite me booking a bit late and thinking that they would forget the snacks like the last time I reserved late. But no, I got everything I needed and reclined my seat to watch the movie. A lady did approach me and asked for my ticket, though, which was fine because she probably thought I just ran in here (which I technically did lol). It was fine since she confirmed my ticket and didn't bother me for the rest of the film. I was able to watch it and it was… okay? I mean, I kinda like it. I just didn't like how I missed the intro because I was late, but that's fine. Afterwards, I took photos of the cool pillow so I can post on my IG. I also looked a little silly bringing just a pillow around so I went to Miniso to buy a bag. Since I couldn't find any generic black bag, I opted to buy myself a Cinnamoroll-themed bag. I also saw a tumbler that I would definitely buy once I get my salary and get my own spot in the office. I just decided to only buy the bag for now. For some reason, I had trouble paying even though I had the money for it. The first transaction failed and it was not recorded. I had to ask the store's manager if they can accept my transaction number as a receipt but they still had to make me pay for it AGAIN and wait for my 1st transaction to be resolved at a later time once they bring it up at their office. It was rough to hear. I really didn't want to pay for the product twice and it was such an issue that caused a line behind me, but whatever, I paid for the item again and just jotted down the number of the store's manager to call tomorrow to help fix my payment dispute. I walked out of the store feeling a little worse, tbh. I just walked around Venice thinking of where to go next, or to just go home. I walk around for a bit and thought about getting a Starbucks, but nah, I didn't feel like it. I also called Gcash support and asked them check my last transaction that failed and if the money can be returned today. As I was walking around, I get a notification that my transaction had been reversed from earlier and I felt great again. I went to the food court to get some food that wasn't that expensive. I ordered some inasal chicken and it was unappetizing because the employee just reheated it in the microwave. It didn't even taste good. I was honestly pretty disappointed and I'm never going back there again. They gave me *dinuguan* as a side and I'm not really a fan of it, so I didn't really enjoy my meal that much. I went home after that. My evening was pretty chill after that. I didn't really do much nor talked to my friends that much. I just talked to a few who replied to my IG Story about the Captain America pillow. I don't know why, but I still felt the same loneliness from yesterday where I missed *someone* a lot. Part of me thought about reaching out to her, but I just dissuaded myself and reminded myself that they're the ones to still left after I reached out. I had some internal dialogue to calm myself down because I had thoughts about them. I guess I'm right. Them leaving after everything I did speaks volumes and that I shouldn't try to bring back a person who's walked away twice in a month. I just did other things for the night like try out Genshin again and watch YouTube.

Song of the day: Middle by DJ Snake, Bipolar Sunshine

The Final Page of a 5-Year Chapter

Fri, 14 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today was an extremely special day in my life. Today was Valentine's Day, sure, but today's events didn't really revolve around romantic relationships nor Valentine's. Today would be my last day at Dice205. My morning started out like it usually would, with me doing the usual round of DevOps tasks that I've been doing for years. I also spent a good amount of time documenting my processes and doing a knowledge transfer to the person who would be handling my tasks. As the day progressed, it fully sank in that it would be my last day here and all of my stress just dissipated. For the afternoon, I was to return to the office one final time to return the company laptop. It was pretty sad to let the MacBook go. This Mac has been with me through countless adventures. It's been with me everywhere and I built great things using this. I built this site using this. My sister also saw me packaging stuff and saying goodbye, and she cried a lot at the thought of me leaving Dice after so long. I essentially told her that it's fine and I would be okay. I booked a ride to the office and I sent some goodbyes before leaving. I messaged my closest friends and other devs that I interviewed 3 years ago. When I submitted my resignation, I initially didn't have any heavy feelings about leaving. But as I was on the way, I could just feel myself getting sadder and sadder. It didn't help that the driver took a route to SLEX that I haven't been on since high school. Today is just full of nostalgia-inducing things. I got near the office and took a few pictures of the places I used to pass by when we were working on-site before the pandemic. I still remember the store I used to get sisig and breakfast from. I would commute to Mandaluyong every day very early in the morning just to make it to my 8 a.m. shift. Who knew that I would stay for 5 years more during those days. After taking the pictures, I returned all of the necessary things, laptop included. We made sure it works and I bid my 2 coworkers there goodbye. It was still 3 p.m. when I booked a ride home. I thought about walking for a bit, doing some thinking. But it's Valentine's and it's a Friday. I don't want to be a single person walking amongst the couples and then going home during rush hour. As I was on the way home, I messaged a few more coworkers goodbye and gave them my heartfelt thanks. I played Taylor Swift's “Cornelia Street” while on the way home and it actually hit me deep. It made me realize that this was kind of my Cornelia Street. This is the kind of heartbreak that time could never mend. Moving forward, I don't think I'll have another company like Dice. All of it just flashed back into my head and I just felt immensely sad. More than anything, I missed *someone*. I missed VHH and how we'd use to talk about work or how I would help them. I missed how we would be together in the planning committee for company events, how I would help them with their HR tasks, and so much more. It hurt my heart a lot that they're not here with me during my last day even though I was on call with them on theirs. It just sucks, but I guess I just have to move forward. After I got home, the rest of the afternoon was pretty chill. I made it before 5 p.m. and I used the time to send more goodbye messages. As the clock struck 5, I timed out and left my final message. I deleted all of my access afterwards. My work files on my PC, deleted the browser all my work stuff was on, left my work's Viber groups. I reinstalled all the VMs I used for work to wipe the data, and just chilled for the rest of the evening. Not a lot of people messaged me, but I appreciate that Rachel greeted me a happy Valentine's, Naomi greeeted as well. One person on Reddit messaged me and I kept up with them for some parts of the evening. I enjoyed talking to one person the most and it was about her things and it's really nice to have gotten a post that she shared with me today. It's a sad and lonely goodbye. Today was literally the last day of a 5-year chapter and, looking back, I don't think I would've changed anything about it. I kind of wish I had made a mood calendar earlier, though, but that's fine. I also wish I had *someone* to celebrate it with. Google Photos did me dirty by showing me how I spent Valentine's Day years ago in 2023. I was with someone and I was on a Discord call with them, in VHH. It's kind of funny because back in Valentine's of 2022, I was sad that I thought I would be leaving soon, and here I am now 3 years later **actually leaving** everything behind on Valentine's Day. On this day, of all days. I'm glad to have ended this chapter, though. I'm ready to move on and look forward to more things in life. I guess I won't walk down my Cornelia Street again.

Song of the day: Cornelia Street by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again
That's the kinda heartbreak time could never mend
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again
And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name
And baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

Crazy!

Thu, 13 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty crazy. I had a lot to do today and I started it great. Over the day, I was so caught up in my work that I wasn't able to take a proper lunch break. Work stressed me out again today but, since it's the finish line, I just let it be. It seems like I'm going to continue working instead of just shadowing. Work continued even at the end where we had a meeting to debug and fix something and it even extended past 5:30 p.m. And the end of work, I felt so tired and exhausted. I caught up with a few people from Reddit that still messaged, but just as I expected, a lot of the people from yesterday had stopped messaging. I'm interested to see if anyone from here will last, but I honestly doubt it. My sister asked me what to get for dinner and I chose Popeyes. We were supposed to have that Valentine's Day promo wherein we'd get chicken and popcorn shrimp, but the restaurant got the order wrong so it was essentially free because we asked for a refund on our incorrect delivery. After that, we still ate the food and we watched the last episode of Beast Games Season 1. It was so hype and I was half-enjoying the first parts. I couldn't enjoy it fully because other people from Reddit had also come in my inbox and I had to message them. Eventually, they started slowing down and my sister decides to order again at Popeyes. We get the same order again and hoped that the restaurant would get it right. Unfortunately, they didn't and I had to ask Grab to refund me again. Still, our orders were here and we ate them as we were finishing the last episode. It was down to the wire and I was so surprised that Jeff won! It was so shocking, I swear. I loved it. The episode ends and my sister and I are feeling okay after that series had ended. Plus what made the night was the basically free dinner, which definitely helped make the day better. By the end of the day, I was alone with my thoughts and it fully sunk in that tomorrow was going to be the last day at my company. I couldn't believe it. For some reason, I couldn't sleep properly and the night continued on.

Song of the day: Back for Good - Radio Mix by Take That

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I guess now it's time for me to give up
I feel it's time
Got a picture of you beside me
Got your lipstick mark still on your coffee cup
Got a fist of pure emotion
Got a head of shattered dreams
Gotta leave it, gotta leave it all behind now

Whatever I said, whatever I did I didn't mean it
I just want you back for good
(Want you back, want you back, want you back for good)
Whenever I'm wrong just tell me the song and I'll sing it
You'll be right and understood
(Want you back, want you back, want you back for good)
I want you back for good

Journal entry for Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

Wed, 12 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Today was pretty stressful. I had a lot of things to juggle today, I wasn't sure if I was able to fully keep on top of a lot of things. What surprised me the most was that I got so many (5+) people from Reddit come and message me. Some were very active and talkative, too. I appreciated it, but it kind of got in my way because replying to them added on top of my mind also. Work was super busy as well today. I'm still a bit stressed out from before, but I was able to slowly work on things better. I had my hands full all day as well guiding, writing docs, and doing KT. It was all well and good by the end, though. I talked to my sister about going out to BGC just so I can de-stress. After timing out for work, we eventually got in a car and headed to BGC. She clearly didn't want to go and was feeling anxious because she was being dramatic in the car, which made me feel uncomfortable. It was also awkward when we got to BGC High Street and she ran around Terra 28th. I didn't plan on running or exercising that much because I didn't have any workout outfit read, and I just wore normal sneakers and not my running shoes. My sister confronted me on whether or not I would walk and exercise and I told her I didn't plan on running here today. We just walked around and I settled on just getting Jamba Juice and then going home. My sister was still pretty awkward with me and things were tense. After getting my drink, she eventually talked to me about what to do and I tell her that I just wanted to send her home now. She was clearly unhappy and stressed while I just wanted to walk around BGC. I needed to clear my head. I'm so stressed and I still feel sad because I haven't fully cleared my chest to anyone. It sucks that my sister has to pile on to whatever I'm feeling when all I wanted was to just have a nice walk outside. She acknowledges that there was a misunderstanding but she still doesn't lighten up. She still refuses to go home even though I already asked her to, and she accompanies me as I head down High Street. She eventually cries for some reason and then decides to go home. She tells me that it's unrelated to me and that I should just go and continue my walk. I didn't think it would be okay for her to go home and be all alone so I just decided to go home as well, even though my sister was insisting me to stay and walk around BGC. We both book a ride home and I really feel stressed out at myself. When will we ever feel okay enough to have a rest? To have a good year is all I ask. I really hope that in my pursuit of a better future, I don't develop a severe mental illness from the stress and emotions I'm bottling up. I better not kill myself, Dartegnian. After we get home separately, things simmer down and things become okay. I reply to the other people I had not messaged throughout the day and some of them keep me up for a good part of the night. Things got okay by the end, though, and my sister and I eat dinner just fine.

Song of the day: Goodnight Irene by The Weavers

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Goodnight, Irene
Goodnight, Irene
I'll see you in my dreams

Last Saturday night I got married
Me and my wife settled down
Now, me and my wife are parted
I'm gonna take another stroll downtown
Irene, goodnight
Irene, goodnight
Goodnight, Irene
Goodnight, Irene
I'll see you in my dreams

Sometimes I live in the country
Sometimes I live in town
Sometimes I take a great notion
To jump into the river and drown

Journal entry for Tuesday, February 11th, 2025

Tue, 11 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

Today would've been a bad day had it not been for a few things that helped me feel a bit better. I woke up on just 5 hours and 18 hours of sleep for some reason and I came into the morning already feeling sub-par. Work was busy right off the bat. I couldn't do my main task, which added to my stress. After work, due to the stress, I didn't feel okay for the rest of the day. I wasn't able to do my main task and things just feel rough. Since I found a bug on my site, I tried hard to debug it and I was able to get SSR working for my site again. I also was able to do make that Git repo for my blog. At the end of the day, I was still feeling strangled and stressed so I tried to find a friend I could talk to. I couldn't decide on a single friend so I just tried to look for someone else online, but my Reddit post was still pending moderation. I tried other sites and I didn't talk to anyone interesting, either. I just tried to browse some videos to cheer myself up. Today would've been a bad day, or even an awful one, but a few things did go right today. I fixed everything I wanted to with regards to my own websites, I played with Milktea quite often in the evening, and my sister gave me a chocolate rose which was really nice. I guess that's the only Valentine's thing I'll be getting this year, but that's fine. All the little things added up to make this day more tolerable than what it actually was.

Song of the day: blue by yung kai

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I'll trust the universe will always bring me to you

Journal entry for Monday, February 10th, 2025

Mon, 10 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was Monday and it marked the first day on my last week at this company. Overall, it was pretty okay. I mostly shadowed for the next DevOps engineer and I worked on some stuff, attended some meetings as well. Did a solid amount of work, all things considered. Afterward, I met up with my sister at Market! Market! We were able to buy new outfits for me to wear for my next workplace. We ate at KFC after that and the food was pretty okay, it was kind of bland for me, for whatever reason. We had too much chicken, too. But after that, I got to buy a new phone case for my iPhone and we booked a ride home. Nothing much happened after that. I did play a DS emulator for a bit and I was super impressed that it just worked on my iPhone. I played Pokémon Platinum for a bit and then scrolled Reddit and IG until I slept.

Song of the day: Let It Rain by Girls' Generation

Lyrics that resonated with me:
見てない振りして
向き合ってこなかった
気付いてたのに It's over over

絶えない雨はそう
嘲笑うかのように
更に叩き付ける Ooh yeah

敵なのか
味方なのか分からない
でも It's time to pay the price
全てが変わる瞬間

Heycat

Sun, 09 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty good, I got to wake up at my usual time and have a good amount of sleep. For the morning, I browsed my old blogs and tried to repost a few noteworthy blog posts onto my main blog. I also fixed some bugs with my blog's theme, and I was glad to have finally fixed some old bugs. I was able to learn about DevOps tools as well, which was nice. For the afternoon, it was mostly just me chilling and then leaving at around 3:50 p.m. or so to do my exercise which was the usual 8km walk to BGC. My sister was going to bike around the same route as well and I left the house first. Things were okay, and what I immediately noticed that I wasn't as tired or out of breath after going through *Libingan ng mga Bayani* this time around. I felt good, really good. I guess my body has started building up strength and endurance after doing this route so often. It was also nice to go through this place at a relatively sunny part of the day instead of the usual sunset. As I was walking to Bayani Road, my left foot slipped and twisted in on itself while going through the road. I thought I would be suffering a sprain after this because that's how they usually start. I paused my music and walked at a slower pace. My sister and her boyfriend eventually pass by me and I checked my ankle for further signs of pain, swelling, or anything else. Fortunately, there were none, despite my initial panic. I keep walking the usual route and then eventually make my way past McKinley Hill and then pass by my sister again. I kept walking my usual route and eventually got to BGC while the sun was still up, which was a surprise. I walked around Terra 28th as usual and I called my Mom to ask about my sister and stuff. I then called my sister and asked to meet her here. I thought she would be here first but they rode around McKinley Hill for a while. They eventually got here and we went to a convenience store to get some drinks. We talked about where to eat dinner, but they couldn't leave their bikes so my sister and her boyfriend eventually had to bike home. I had to eat dinner alone and I wondered on which restaurant was relatively “healthy” to eat at. Since I was already at BGC High Street, I tried Heybo which was literally right behind me. Heybo had a few healthy meals and I just opted for the one where I made my own bowl. I asked ChatGPT on which of these would be great for gout and I chose their recommended pick. I got my order eventually and it was okay, so to speak. The food was a little cold, though, which didn't sit well with me considering the price. I just did random things and posted my walk to Strava while eating. I also saw this stray cat try and eat and even jump at a man's table outside. I felt sorry for it and the man even tried pushing it away. Even the guard tried to move it away, to no avail because the cat just tried coming back to the man. I felt really sorry for the poor cat and I had to just finish eating after the man kicked it away. I grabbed the remaining tuna piece on my plate and walked outside, but I couldn't find it. I eventually did find it after a bit of looking and fed them all the tuna I had in my hand. I left it after that and booked a ride home. The rest of the evening was pretty chill. I mostly just watched videos and then tried to stand at every hour so I can complete my “1 week perfect stand goal” on my Apple Watch. It kept me up until 11 p.m. even though my bedtime was supposed to be 10:30 p.m. but I was able to close the stand ring and get some well-needed sleep for the night. Personally, I'm just glad I didn't suffer an extreme sprain from earlier and that says a lot considering I get sprained easily.

Song of the day: Volume Up by 4Minute

Journal entry for Saturday, February 8th, 2025

Sat, 08 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was pretty productive. I actually woke up at a correct time today and I got 7 hours and 55 minutes of sleep last night, which was really nice. Morning started quick and I had my Paotsin breakfast, which was basically a spare meal from last night. After that, I learned more about some DevOps tools and DevOps in the morning, which intrigued me. I also did some cleaning and helped organize some stuff in the room closet. I had lunch after that and chilled for the early afternoon. In the late afternoon to evening, I worked on a new feature for my blog and started writing a new blog post. Then I suddenly had this idea to change the site's color and theme whenever a user scrolls past an image. I quickly was able to work on it and fix a bug in the process. I'm also really glad that my React code has grown as a considerably separate thing from my original Angular code. I deployed my latest fixes and it looked really nice! I was honestly so amazed to see the color change based on the image. I was able to also complete that blog post and I'm personally just glad that I was able to deploy it so quickly. I kind of broke my “no social media” rule today by posting about my blog on IG, but it's fine since today was already a productive day. I even washed all of the dishes tonight and was ready for *wind down* by 7:50 p.m. I did one final productive thing by the end which was to backport all of the fixes and code I have in my main website to my portfolio. It's been neglected a bit and had this weird scrolling bug, but luckily I was able to fix it within an hour. I was able to backport all of the new fixes quickly, too. All in all, today was a really productive weekend and I'm surprised at the amount of work I've done. I wish most weekends of my new life is like this.

Song of the day: どりーみんチュチュ (feat. 巡音ルカ&初音ミク) by emon(Tes.)

Journal entry for Friday, February 7th, 2025

Fri, 07 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Today was your usual day, things were pretty okay at work and I wrote up some docs as I'm preparing to leave by next week. In the afternoon, I got really busy and ended up focusing hard to finish this task by Monday. In the evening, I just chilled by watching a lot of Marvel stuff and I didn't really browse social media that much aside from Reddit. I gave myself a break from IG today on what was supposed to be a complete break from all forms of social media, but I could only do IG today. I just washed the dishes in the evening, then browsed and commented on Reddit before going to bed.

Song of the day: Nice to Meet You, Mr. Earthling by PinocchioP

Wrapping It Up

Thu, 06 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today is one of the last days I have at this company and I really had to get everything organized for my departure next week. My morning started a bit chaotic with my GPU still being broken and it was so frustrating and sad that it actually broke at the month where I didn't want things to break. It was just surprising that it broke on me and it still shocked me. After talking it out with my sister and Mom, my sister agreed to lend me her AMD graphics card until next month or so when I could buy my new one. It was a bit of a hassle setting up and moving to an AMD setup from an Nvidia one in Arch Linux, but I was able to make it work. After that, work progressed normally in the afternoon and I was mostly busy. I'm still proud I got to fully set up a full site on Kubernetes during one call session, which still impresses me. I was even able to set up something else on the fly. I'm glad and by the end of work, we just had a dev team meeting which we played and I held one of the top spots. I also said my goodbyes and it really sunk in that I'm going to leave everyone now, including faces that I passed through during my dev interviewer phase 3 years ago. Then I timed out of work and we ordered *lugaw* because my sister was feeling sick. We watched episode 9 of Beast Games and we both had a fun time watching it. I washed dishes and cleaned up a bit , wrote my journal entries and deployed it, and then went to bed. I also made a promise to myself to not use social media for tomorrow and during the weekdays so I can actually focus on learning more DevOps tools for my new job.

Song of the day: Ocean Man by Ween

Today Was Crazy

Wed, 05 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today started like any other morning, or so I thought. I updated my PC and tried using it… until it started to freeze. I started to just not work. I had to troubleshoot it quick because of my morning meetings and I eventually figured out that my graphics card, a passed-down GTX 1080 TI I bought in 2021, had died. It was so heartbreaking. A crucial computer component dead and my 26,000 Pesos bit the dust. Needless to say, I was incredibly devastated. For once in a long time, I didn't have a functional and working computer. I felt like crying a bit because I know money is going to be tight for February but I couldn't because I had to focus on work. I had a lot of tasks that I all accomplished on the MacBook, but it's just sad that I have to return this soon and my only PC died on me. Fuck! Of all the days! I knew I shouldn't have played Spider-Man. I vowed to just rebuild a better, more powerful PC some point this year and just figure out a solution for this. My day continued on normally. But after timing out from work, I had to ask my sister to tag along with me and walk to BGC. The walk was grueling at the start, as always. But I eventually felt better and all my sad or angry thoughts dissipated. Which was weird, by the way. Before getting there, I was just extremely angry and furious. I guess this is just me getting mad at life for actually having my GPU break at a month where I'm going through a financial struggle. And that's despite not playing video games on it for more than a month! And barely any games for the past few months! It's so infuriating so I understood where I was coming from. Our walk completed fine and we just walked a bit more around BGC. We called Mom and she was happy for us and we went to my usual hangout at Starbucks on 32nd Street. My sister got matcha with pesto and I got a pink drink with a four-cheese flatbread. I actually wanted the flatbread with the sausage and bacon, but whatever. We eventually had to go home and booked separate Angkas rides. I arrived home way earlier than my sister din, despite her booking and having her ride arrive first. I just relaxed and chilled for the night and I was amazed that I just did the same walk literally 7 days ago. I even ended up at Starbucks at around the same time, too.

Song of the day: Digital Love by Daft Punk

Journal entry for Tuesday, February 4th, 2025

Tue, 04 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much happened today, I mostly just focused on work for the morning and afternoon. I was so busy, I didn't notice time pass by quick but it also feels like I'm trying to fast-forward it. After work, I passed the time by playing that Spider-Man 2 game I downloaded, which shocked me because I didn't think my GPU could handle it. I got to a good point in the story until I had to call it off and turn in for the night.

Song of the day: Defying Gravity by Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Too long, I've been afraid of
Losing love, I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost

I'd sooner buy defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye, I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down

Journal entry for Monday, February 3rd, 2025

Mon, 03 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much happened today aside from work meetings in the morning and afternoon. In my free time, I wanted to do something productive but didn't really do any. I guess I'm resting or starting to burn out from coding so much from the past few days. I mostly was just on IG and I played a bit of Project Diva on Steam. I only played 1 song, which was “Just Be Friends” and I quit the game afterwards. I downloaded Spider-Man 2 for the PC but didn't play it on account of me prioritizing productivity instead of gaming. Today was pretty boring.

Song of the day: Rather Be (feat. Jess Glynne) by Clean Bandit

Journal entry for Sunday, February 2nd, 2025

Sun, 02 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I couldn't sleep that well again today as I spent all night until 4 a.m. trying to fix that bug which I ultimately gave up on. I tried to sleep but I got acid attacks so I slept really early in the morning instead. When I woke up, nothing much happened. I enjoyed the rest of my weekend with the looming feeling that I should get back to being productive and stop wasting my time. In the afternoon, I fixed a major bug for my blog that made color updating so slow, and after fixing it the time was reduced to a few milliseconds from 1 whole second. I was glad at finally fixing it and I also fixed that bug I had since the past day by refactoring a few things. In the evening, I had spare time and I got fully cleaned up, ate dinner, and took up a Kubernetes course. It was all well and good and I tried to get everything done before bedtime, which I did.

Song of the day: Rather Be (feat. Jess Glynne) by Clean Bandit

Journal entry for Saturday, February 1st, 2025

Sat, 01 Feb 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

The first of February started out pretty sad. I opened that “Playlist in a Bottle” thing that Spotify had and I saw the things my early 2024 self sent to me. When I opened it, it was pretty okay. A couple songs that were featured were still songs I played in my usual rotation of songs. When I reached the end, Spotify revealed a note from my past self and it read: > Please still be friends with her :( That immediately broke my heart. I was probably thinking at the time that I would still be friends with her, or maybe I would not, hence the sad face. Whatever my thinking was, uncovering it made me pretty sad because I failed my past self. It just highlighted how sad and different life has been without her. Since I had no one to tell it to, I initially posted it on my IG Story for my Close Friends list. Then I remembered that I was still friends with Jinn/Flame on Discord and I told them all about it. It was hard to admit to them but they eventually told me some words of encouragement and told me that they still play Sky. It honestly sucks but, aside from screenshots and my journal entries, Jinn is the only remaining link to that time in my life. Having that weight is just sad, but I have to keep going. I wrote a blog post about love since I couldn't sleep and I stayed up until 5 a.m. or so. When I woke up, I just browsed the Internet, commented on Reddit, and did a few miscellaneous things. For most of the day, I was optimizing the code for my website and I fixed a lot of major bugs and refactored a huge chunk of the code. I also mostly listened to Girls' Generation's songs the entire afternoon, and I haven't listened to their old songs in so long. I spent the whole day just coding for my website, even though I should halt any work on it aside from my daily journal entries. Because of that, I didn't get to have any time to learn or pick up much DevOps material. The day and night continued with me trying to fix this custom image bug that I couldn't solve, no matter how hard I tried. This went on for the entire night.

Song of the day: Oh! by Girls' Generation

2020 Mini

Fri, 31 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today seemed like a normal, busy day in my life. I was really busy and invested in work. It really dawned on me that I only had 2 more weeks at the company, which just really sunk in. I interacted with a lot of people and a coworker saw how much value I bring to the company as the sole DevOps that strings in the entire architecture together. I also achieved a lot in Kubernetes, so that's always a plus. After work, things were mostly boring and forgettable aside from me talking about Beast Games Season 1 to my sister. My evening was just about to wind down when Loy invited me to Discord. I don't often play PC games anymore after I ditched that chapter in December, but we got to play a few games together. We played Fall Guys together while talking about his current relationship and we even tried Among Us for no reason. We liked playing it so much and it was fun to play as imposter, even though only one of us was an imposter at a time. We never got to be both imposters. Still, it was fun playing and I was able to end the day on a win as a crewmate and Loy was outed as an imposter. So that was pretty fun overall. This was kind of like a day in 2020. A mini 2020. A day where I focused on work and myself, and had time to play PC games with friends. So that was pretty fun overall.

Song of the day: One Last Time by Girls' Generation

Lyrics that resonated with me:
끝난 계절 속의 너와 나
끌어안아도 결국 달아나
함께였던 많은 낮과 밤
전부 다 잊진 마

이별 앞에 멈춘 너와 나
마지막 니 모습을 새겨 봐
오래 간직할 수 있도록 (할 수 있도록)
잠시만 One last time

(So give me one) One last time
(So give me one) One last time
(Give me one) One last time
One last time

Journal entry for Thursday, January 30th, 2025

Thu, 30 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was a pretty chill day, I was mostly busy with work in the morning and afternoon. But after clocking out, I had a lot of free time to just learn more about DevOps tools and update the Docker files for my websites. Overall, it was nice, but I wish I learned more and did more today.

Song of the day: Never Say Never by Justin Bieber, Jaden

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I will never say never (I will fight)
I will fight 'till forever (Make it right)
Whenever you knock me down, I will not stay on the ground
Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up, pick it up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up
And never say never

Walk and More

Wed, 29 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was a pretty productive day. My day started with me catching up on all the journal entries I've missed and I finished writing and implementing that sitemap generator for all of my journal entries. I submitted the sitemap index to Google and went to sleep afterward. I got a relatively-full 7 hours of sleep, which kind of surprised me because I kept waking up in-between sessions. I had a really weird dream, too. But I eventually woke up, had a bit of egg and kimchi that my sister prepared, and started my morning a bit late at 11 a.m. I thought about what else to do and it was this JSON+LD for those individual journal entries. SEO seems annoying but I just worked on it and fixed a couple of bugs all afternoon. I still hadn't found the solution come late afternoon and my sister had left to go biking, so I had nothing to do at home. I just randomly decided to go and walk the route my Mom, sister, and I used to walk through early in the year. Since I had nothing to do and nothing tied me down, I went out for a walk all by myself. The first part of the walk was grueling as always, but after passing Bayani Road and walking to Venice, things got easier. I messaged to Mom for a bit and I went to a bathroom near Venice Grand Plaza. What shocked me was that there were fireworks behind me and a fireworks show randomly started as I was walking. I took a few photos and sent them to my Mom and sister, and then I continued walking. After a bit of time, I eventually reached BGC and even used the time to look for that Blue Cloud Sport Loop for my Apple Watch. Unfortunately, no stores had it in stock either, and one even recommended me to go to Power Mac Center in Greenbelt, which I've been to and checked twice. I continued my walk until I got to Starbucks on 32nd Street. Since I still had a reward for completing 100 stars in the app, I decided to use it so that I wouldn't spend any money. I just got myself that iced hibiscus tea with pomegranate pearls since I didn't want anything calorie-heavy. I took a few photos, saw my run on Strava, and posted a few updates on IG. Mom called me on FaceTime and she showed me some parts of Saudi and she told me about what she was doing. She eventually had to leave the call and do her own stuff. I saw her on Strava and I was impressed that she was able to run 17 kilometers/10.5 miles in 2 hours. After that, I just finished my drink and went home. I eventually got home just fine and I was surprised that it was already Wind Down for me. But I used the time to fix the JSON+LD bug from earlier and apparently the fix was for me to just remove 1 if condition, which honestly made me feel stupid. It was fine, though, and I just resubmitted my sitemap to Google and slept on time.

Song of the day: Super Trouper by ABBA

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I was sick and tired of everything
When I called you last night from Glasgow
All I do is eat and sleep and sing
Wishing every show was the last show
(Wishing every show was the last show)

...

Tonight, the Super Trouper lights are gonna find me
Shining like the sun (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Smiling, having fun (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Feeling like a number one

Tonight, the Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me
But I won't feel blue (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
Like I always do (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you

Journal entry for Tuesday, January 28th, 2025

Tue, 28 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

I was bored today so I **finally** watched Mamma Mia! (2008) today. It was super weird and kind of sad to watch a musical without somebody. Throughout the whole time, I was just thinking how fun watching this would be if I have someone here with me. It particularly stung when I heard some of the lyrics to "Mamma Mia" again. I enjoyed the movie, though, even though I found the story a bit clunky. I just couldn't shake off the feeling that this would be better if I watched this with someone. For the rest of the evening, I tried to run DeepSeek R1 on my computer and was it heavy to run. I thought about upgrading my PC this year to the latest specs. After that, I finally worked on a sitemap generator for my site's calendar entries. I also caught up on my journal entries during that.

Song of the day: Mamma Mia - From 'Mamma Mia!' Original Motion Picture Soundtrack by Meryl Streep

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I was angry and sad when I knew we were through
I can't count all the times I've cried over you
Look at me now, will I ever learn?
I don't know how, but I suddenly lose control
There's a fire within my soul

...

Mamma mia, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
Mamma mia, does it show again?
My my, just how much I've missed you

Yes, I've been brokenhearted
Blue since the day we parted
Why, why did I ever let you go?

Journal entry for Monday, January 27th, 2025

Mon, 27 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Journal entry for Sunday, January 26th, 2025

Sun, 26 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Sunday started with me still staying at Loy's house and I'm starting to feel very, very sleepy now, but I can't sleep. I had to burn the Windows 11 ISO to the flash drive we bought and, after burning it from Arch Linux, I rebooted to the install USB. I encountered this weird and obscure error. Apparently, just using the **dd** program doesn't work when making a Windows 11 install drive. This was a recent issue, happening only on the latest version as of writing (24H2) and I was just extremely frustrated with nothing to do. When I rebooted, the Arch install medium I was in earlier was reset, and didn't have the downloaded ISO anymore. So it's either I wait 1 more hour or think of something else. Frustrated, I plugged in one random USB drive we had lying around and that one apparently had Windows 11. It's not the latest, but I figured I could install that first, download the latest ISO, reformat the drive, and do the whole process AGAIN. This little maneuver would probably cost me 50 years and I'm so tired, but fuck it. Installing from an older install medium took SO DAMN LONG. It installed and restarted so many times, it even downloaded bullshit updates during the install process, which was super annoying because I'm so sleep-deprived at this point. While waiting, Kai sent me a "How are you" and we talked for a bit about how things are going with me. She was so shocked to hear so much has happened in my life in just 2 months of no talking, but she also said she was glad that I still upheld the no-contact thing between me and someone. She eventually dropped off after that and I got back to installing and resting between sessions. The Internet was so slow and I had a lot of annoying setup quirks, but eventually, I reached a point where I could just download things and leave the PC alone to download. I took a long nap while Loy eventually woke up and got ready for the day. He woke me up to tell me that the downloads were done and I updated, installed a few things, and eventually set a wallpaper for his PC. Overall, he's very happy with how clean his setup looked and he was glad that it didn't look as bad as we thought. Personally, I'm super glad I was able to build a PC from parts again and I got it to POST, with no additional configurations or tinkering after placing the parts. I also told to Loy that I didn't take it apart anymore after we finished building and he also seemed impressed. Since he was hungry and we were done here, we left in his car to the nearby Popeye's and he ordered for us. We mostly talked about the Steam Deck and Nintendo Switch 2 while we were eating, and he also showed his new PC to the other people he knew. We finished our food and he eventually drove me back to my place. We talked about the various Chris Hansen shows over the years and talked about the recent "Connecticut Arc" we separately watched a lot of back in 2021. Then we arrived at my place and he drove back. I got home and asked my sister when she'd be building her new PC with her boyfriend, and she said that it was later today. I got a lot of rest for the remainder of the afternoon. For the evening, things were pretty relaxed. A friend talked to me and invited me to join them in Boracay this June, which I quickly agreed to. My sister's boyfriend came over to help set up her new PC in this new, white M-ATX case. I told them that and I mostly ate dinner and chilled for the evening. I spent the entire evening doing some light work and organizing my files between my PC, Google Drive, and iCloud Drive. At the end of the day, I finished organizing the files on my PC and backing them all up.

Song of the day: Here Comes The Sun - Remastered 2009 by The Beatles

Building Loy's PC

Sat, 25 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today's main highlight was me going out with Loy to Gilmore so we could build his PC. I woke up relatively early, at my usual wake-up time and I mostly chilled for the morning. Loy told me that he would eventually arrive at my house around noon and I got ready by 10 a.m. I just passed the time by waiting and scrolling through IG Reels. Then 12 p.m. came, then 1 p.m. came, which was off. I didn't expect him to arrive late and he didn't really give me an update. Frustrated, I didn't want to waste this day when I still had a medical examination pending. I decided to get my drug test done so that my pre-employment medical exams were complete. I booked a ride to Ayala North Exchange and got there eventually. Loy eventually messages me and says that he'll get to my house at 3 p.m. or so, which is weird. I told him that I'd get my medical exam done first at Ayala North Exchange and he could pick me up from there instead. He agreed and I eventually got my medical exam done, which was honestly a frictionless process. One staff member went up to me to ask for my ID and I had to pull out my Cinnamoroll wallet to give her my ID. She chuckled when I pulled my wallet out and saw Cinnamoroll, and she said that it was cute. I felt happy from that and I eventually got my medical exam done. Just as I was completing it, Loy rang my phone over and over again while I was in the final stages and it was a bit embarrassing. I was able to complete my medical exam and then head downstairs to meet up with Loy. I got in the car and we drove to Gilmore. While on the way there, we talked about a few things, but he mostly talked about his relationship experience and the stories between him and his girlfriend. I just listen attentively and share snippets of the lessons I've learned from my past relationships. I liked looking at the road while on the way there, though, so it was nice to just talk and see so many things pass by. We eventually arrive at Gilmore and I tell him to park at Robinsons Manila because that's where Jaze and I parked back in 2021. We got off and we headed straight to PCHub to get the parts. When we got to PCHub, it was exactly in the same state as it was when we last visited 6 years ago. We ordered the list of parts that we wanted and, in the end, the total was actually *lower* than what Loy had budgeted for. So we decided to upgrade a few things, mainly the NVMe SSD that he has from 1TB to 2TB and his RAM from 16GB to 32GB, and the rest was good. He withdrew money from an ATM nearby and it actually couldn't dispense more money for him, so Loy went back and asked me to follow him in withdrawing more money. But after that, we went back and the guy said that our order was "for releasing" which would take 30 minutes. Loy and I thought about whether or not we would stay here and wait for the items or we would go back to Robinsons Magnolia to eat first. Since we had nothing to do and we didn't want the hassle of going back and forth from Robinsons Magnolia, we just stayed at PCHub to wait for the order to be released. And was it a goddamn long wait. We waited for more than 30 minutes and they sure took their time. We passed by just standing and talking amongst ourselves, but eventually, the PC parts were shipped out. It was actually annoying because the old guy prioritized the guy that came **after** us and he did a whole suite of bootup tests. Meanwhile, our PC parts were just sitting and they didn't have any testing. It frustrated us but we just went with it and I carried the PC parts back to Robinson's Magnolia where we ate for a bit. We couldn't decide on what to get so I chose for us and decided on Bonchon. Loy also got some dumplings from a store nearby and he remarked that the old guy looked like a stereotypical old guy who would sell dumplings, which made me laugh a bit. Loy then carried the PC parts as we went back to his car and we got lost in the parking space for a bit. It looked a bit eerie and liminal, but I couldn't take a picture because we had to go back to Loy's place to assemble it. We eventually found his car and we talked about random stuff on the way to his house. When we got to his house, we brought all of the PC parts upstairs and I got started on building his PC from scratch. It was fairly simple and straightforward, I had set up the CPU into the motherboard socket and then applied the cooler shortly afterward. It kind of surprised me that the cooler already had thermal paste pre-installed, to my surprise. I spent the next few hours trying to consult the motherboard documentation, wiring up everything, and making sure the connections were snug. I didn't need a video and I only read manuals sparingly because I already knew what I was doing. Loy offered some help by plugging in a few screws here and there and helping me hold the parts, but after that, he had to call his girlfriend and I had to take it from there. Building the PC was actually grueling and I had apparently cut myself on the back of my finger somehow. I don't know how or why, but it was only a small cut. During building, I found out that I had instructed Loy to buy the wrong fan size for the case. I directed him to 140mm case fans when the case ideally supports 120mm case fans. I could only fit 2 fans at the top for exhaust, but the rest of the case fans were left unused. Loy also got fussy that we didn't have a fan hub so some fan cables were strewn behind the CPU cooler, which he didn't like. The night went on for **a lot longer** because we didn't have an install USB for Windows 11. The other laptops in the house were unusable as Ate Mae's laptop was severely locked down and Dea didn't have a USB C to A adapter, so we were all out of options. I had to call my sister to have my USB drive delivered via Grab. And after that, we took a break. Eventually, my USB drive was delivered and we were able to go upstairs to try the install. I realized that the USB drive contained Arch Linux, not Windows, and I just shook my head. But I just figured out a way to download the ISO and burn it to the drive. My night went on for longer because of this annoying and grueling process.

Song of the day: I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor

Journal entry for Friday, January 24th, 2025

Fri, 24 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Journal entry for Thursday, January 23rd, 2025

Thu, 23 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Today was the first day without Mom around and it was a little lonely, I have to admit. Nothing noteworthy happened for the rest of the day but things felt empty and the house felt quiet.

Song of the day: MR.TAXI by Girls' Generation

On A Jet Plane

Wed, 22 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I was mostly sick for the morning and even had a slight fever so I decided to call in sick for the morning and just do my work in the afternoon. I took some medicine and rested for the morning until noon, then I timed in for work and did my usual round of tasks. I also completed a bulk of them, too. After work, we had to bring Mom to the airport. My sister already had McDonald's delivered so we just had to eat and get ready to leave for NAIA. Our plan there was to eat here, drop Mom off, and eat at Burger King later. I ate my food and Mom readied her stuff before leaving. We quickly got ready and we got a ride there. We took a few photos before leaving and Mom's luggage was carried downstairs. Ailysh sat at the window seat, I sat in the middle, and Mom sat at the other window seat to my right. The trip was like any other Grab trip but Mom was posting the pics we took earlier to her FB Story. I made her sit in the middle of us and Ailysh cried while trying to do her morning work in the car. We eventually arrived in NAIA and Ailysh was already crying a lot by then. As we approached the NAIA Departures area, Ailysh was already crying a lot. We eventually got off and I showed them the airport's entrances and where would be entering from as non-passengers. Mom got to the airport at the passenger side and we went to the side. We saw Mom from the other side of the rail and she kissed us on the top of our heads before leaving to get checked in. Ailysh was crying a lot and we went to a part of the airport I hadn't explored yet. We went up the escalator and I was so shocked that it led up to an area with Tim Horton's, McDonald's, and other restaurants. We sat at the Tim Horton's and I was surprised that my Mom called me via FaceTime. We talked for a while and then she had to go process stuff for her departure. Eventually, Mom called me again and told us to wait for her and we eventually went to terminal E or something to wait for her. While on the way there, I saw the other shops and restaurants within NAIA and I was so shocked. There were clothing stores, a small Nike store, and other restaurants. They even had a Subway! We mostly just sat at the same spot waiting for her. Ailysh did some work on the laptop she brought and I was just looking out at the people below. People who were processing their luggage for their flights. Mom took a while and even had to move stuff from her luggage so she could have it loaded. But eventually, she finished and went upstairs to the floor we were on with all the restaurants and stores. She hugged us and we took a few pics with her before her departure. She was kind of in a hurry because the plane would be departing in less than an hour and she had to go through Immigrations, so she just hugged us and we parted ways. Mom boarded her flight and we walked around to find a place to eat. I was honestly surprised to see more restaurants like Chowking and Army Navy, and we even saw the Mary Grace restaurant and a KFC. I decided to eat at KFC instead and we just chilled there for a while. Mom called me again before boarding her flight and Ailysh and I said goodbye to her. Ailysh continued to do her work and I finished eating. I looked around and felt really inspired by the airport, and I wish I could go here again sometime soon. Hopefully as a passenger next time. We booked a ride home and then I had a difficult time talking downstairs due to my sprain, but thankfully we weren't late for the car. While on the way home, the car played "Memories" by Maroon 5 and the times we spent with Mom over the past month just flashed in my head. I began to slowly start crying while the song was playing. It was such an off song to play, but whatever. The radio played other sad songs and that eventually made my sister cry as well. Upon arriving home, my sister just cried and cried at not seeing Mom anymore. The rest of the day was quiet but also sad. I told my sister to only wait for 11 more months before seeing Mom again and she cried again. She really missed Mom and something about this year's visit just made us more attached, despite not being with her for more than a decade already. I just gave her advice and motivation for us to do well this 2025 and to have fun, happy moments with Mom again at the end of the year.

Song of the day: Memories by Maroon 5

Journal entry for Tuesday, January 21st, 2025

Tue, 21 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing much happened today except that it was Mom's last full day here in the house before she leaves for the airport tomorrow. She spent most of the day just cleaning the house because she did not want to leave the house dirty and she also prepared some food for us tomorrow. At night, my Mom and sister spent the night in my room.

Journal entry for Monday, January 20th, 2025

Mon, 20 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Song of the day: Panalangin by APO Hiking Society

Journal entry for Sunday, January 19th, 2025

Sun, 19 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Sunday was pretty chill compared to yesterday. For the morning and afternoon, I was mostly on IG. I was bored and, since it's been a while since I posted pictures, I decided to come up with a new set of pictures to post. I decided on the color blue for the next set and I had set the privacy of those pics to my "Close Friends" list only. Quite a bit of my friends liked my posts, and Belle even liked all of the posts, which made me a bit happy. Naomi commented things, so that was also nice. I also talked to Tiffany and we laughed about IG's new vertical layout and I showed her screenshots of K-Pop feeds that were broken due to the new layout and we both had a good laugh. After that, we got ready to have our last mass before Mom left at Greenbelt. We booked a ride there and attended mass just fine. After that, we split ways so that I could go to Greenbelt 5 to look for a Blue Cloud Sport Loop band again for my Apple Watch. When I got there, they didn't have any of those and I was forced to go back to Greenbelt. I stopped by the Power Mac Center again and they didn't have it in stock, too, sadly. I just waited for my Mom and sister because we were going to eat at Manam (again) and we got seated shortly afterward. Our dinner was fine, I got a small order of their tofu sisig and Mom chose *bulalo* for us, and she also ordered some type of chicken. The servings were small this time, even to the point where we had to ask the waiters if we got the right size, but we eventually had some take-out and booked a ride home shortly afterward.

Song of the day: Cold Heart - PNAU Remix by Elton John, Dua Lipa, PNAU

Journal entry for Saturday, January 18th, 2025

Sat, 18 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Saturday continued with us still walking to Starbucks 8 Forbes Town and we eventually got there after some walking. I got a free gift within the app that entitled me to any 1 item on the menu. I just chose a "pure matcha" drink because it was already midnight and I was going to sleep soon. After drinking, we booked a ride home and arrived quickly. We rested shortly afterward. My Saturday was supposed to be a bit nerve-wracking considering that I have to do my pre-employment medical exam and I hate having to do that fecalysis and CBC again, but whatever. I went to have my PEME done and went to the Filomena building in Makati pretty early. I got my paperwork filed and organized, and thankfully everything was paid beforehand so I didn't have to do anything else aside from having my tests done. I actually made a mistake in that I waited too long at the X-ray section, around 1 hour, because I thought that they would call my number. It didn't occur to me that I would submit my paperwork **first** in order to have my number called, so I just waited like an idiot. I talked to the other members of Baguettes, Maxine and Meryll, and we had a small talk before I did my other tests. Unfortunately, I took too long in the X-ray examination. Actually, I just wasted an hour of my time because I didn't submit my paper and I thought that the doctor would just call my name. He never did and I had to submit my paper in order for him to actually call me and made me do my chest X-ray. Eventually, I got my tests done and my sister informed me that they'll be headed directly to SM MoA to fetch their ColorFest Asia run numbers, as well as their other stuff for tomorrow's run. I told them that I'd catch up, I just need to go to Glorietta to buy that Blue Cloud Sport Loop band for my Apple Watch. I eventually arrived at Glorietta and the band wasn't at Switch, so I checked other Apple resellers nearby. They didn't have it. I went to SM Makati and checked out The Loop and Digital Walker there, and they said that they didn't have it as well. I then went to Power Mac Center in Greenbelt, and they didn't have it either. Frustrated, I just booked a ride to SM MoA to meet up with Mom and my sister. I got there quickly and, since I had time, I went to SM Cyberzone to check if the Power Mac Center there had the band I was looking for. Apparently, they did have it, but it was only for the 42mm Apple Watch, and mine was 49mm, so they didn't have it for my watch. Disappointed, I just waited for them to arrive and my Mom and sister eventually saw me. We walked around a bit more to find a restaurant to eat and we eventually settled for Manam. The line was long and there were a lot of people ahead of us, so we just waited outside. I was getting really tired so my sister bought me some tofu *sisig* and water at a tofu store nearby, which was really good. I felt okay afterward and we got seated inside. I enjoyed the food, especially the *pancit* and *Bicol Express*. We talked about their run tomorrow and they said that they would have to leave early, at 2 a.m. or something, and I noticed that it was already around 7:40 p.m. I asked for the waiter to pack up all our food for take-out and had the bill paid. Thankfully, we booked a ride quickly and got home just in time. We all rested early afterward.

Song of the day: Cold Heart - PNAU Remix by Elton John, Dua Lipa, PNAU

Journal entry for Friday, January 17th, 2025

Fri, 17 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

I posted IG Stories and slept shortly afterward. I didn't do much for most of the day because I was on leave from work. I did receive a free pepperoni pizza, which was nice since they gave me the option to choose what they would send me. After that, I mostly spent my afternoon catching up with my journal entries and finished them before leaving for the evening. For the evening, we 3 would go out to Uptown in BGC to eat at Texas Roadhouse. We ate the same order we had in 2023 and it was pretty good. The steak was really nice, too. Our server for the evening was also super energetic and lively, and we liked them a lot. After sitting down, things were fine and we went back to eating. Before leaving, we asked for the server again and waited for them because we wanted to give them a tip. We also had our leftovers ordered for take-out. Thankfully, we caught them just as they were leaving and managed to give them the tip, we also got our take-out. We just walked after leaving the restaurant to the Starbucks that was around Forbes Town and we wanted to walk there so we could burn some of the calories we got from eating.

Song of the day: Accidentally In Love by Counting Crows

A Walk to Remember

Thu, 16 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Nothing noteworthy happened during the morning today and work just passed by fine. Some of my colleagues asked me some tips about my next career path and some general questions about DevOps, and I mostly worked on my tasks for today. Things ramped up in the afternoon which made me take a while to time out of work. After that, my Mom and sister invited me to go and walk with them to BGC like we did on New Year's. I agreed and wore my standard outfit. We walked from *Libingan ng mga Bayani* to Bonifacio High Street and it was such a long walk. My Mom asked me if we wanted to take the jeep instead since they were worried for me, but it was fine and I was confident that I could walk all the way to BGC with them. It was a hard walk, with my heel still hurting from yesterday but I powered through in the name of fitness. When we got to BGC, they still weren't tired so we walked for a bit more on Terra 28th, like we did yesterday, and I got a lot of steps on my Apple Watch. After they got tired, we walked around for a little bit while deciding what to eat for dinner. We stopped by Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf because my Mom wanted to drink matcha (and also because she doesn't think that the matcha in Starbucks is "organic" enough). We got matcha and they also got me a slice of a blueberry cheesecake. After that, we walked around for a little bit more. My sister saw some kids mimicking Squid Game and she bought some spare plain white t-shirts at Bench. While my Mom and I were waiting outside, my Mom noticed that a guy's face was swollen and I didn't notice because we sat at separate locations. When I saw the situation, my sister had already given the guy an antihistamine for his swelling and his face had swelled up really bad. My Mom instructed his friends to get water for him and we eventually left on our way, and they also thanked us for helping them. Thankfully, we were at the right place at the right time to actually help them, or else the guy could have gone into allergic shock because of shrimp. We then decided to continue walking to Manam, the same Manam where the RC and I went to eat about a month ago, and we ordered some food. We talked for a bit, I took a photo of my Apple Watch, and we finished eating shortly afterward. We went to a nearby Watsons to buy some medicine and I heard a weird guy mumble and talk about the California Wildfire and how it started because they dissed God at the Golden Globe Awards. It was seriously off-putting and infuriating to see religious fanatics and lunatics blame a natural disaster on people and he reminded me of that weirdo Grab driver from yesterday. We continued shopping for a bit and the guy spits out the same dialogue, the same script to the cashiers and they just nodded in agreement, probably feeling a bit threatened. The guy eventually leaves and we purchase our stuff. We booked a Grab ride home and thankfully things were okay this time around. We got home easily and without issue. Surprisingly, I logged 13,000 steps today and walked a total of 9.68 kilometers, which is a genuine milestone because I haven't walked that much in a long time. I'm glad that I was able to walk that much and have no issues afterward. One thing I noticed today was that I kept playing ABBA's song "Angeleyes" and thinking of my days with someone 3 years ago. It made me think of how much butterflies I felt spending this time of the year with someone back in 2022.

Song of the day: Angeleyes by ABBA

Lyrics that resonated with me:
Sometimes when I'm lonely I sit and think about him
And it hurts to remember all the good times
When I thought I could never live without him
And I wonder does it have to be the same?
Every time when I see him, will it bring back all the pain?
Ah-ha-ha, how can I forget that name?

Journal entry for Wednesday, January 15th, 2025

Wed, 15 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

Today was pretty chill and work continued as usual. Nothing noteworthy happened during work and in the morning so my shift ended without issue. For the evening, since my Mom wanted my sister and I to go for a run, we went to Terra 28th in BGC after timing out. We booked a ride to Terra 28th instead of commuting or walking there and they eventually started running shortly after. I still wasn't used to running large distances so I wasn't able to run along with them, but I took my time walking and recorded my steps. We spent a good time walking and running around, and I think my Mom ran around 12 kilometers and my sister was at around 7 or so. I just had 3 to 4 kilometers of walking lol. It's not much, but it's a start I guess. After that, we went to Marugame Udon because I wanted my Mom to try it out and also because she wanted pork tonkatsu. We ate and walked around for a bit more to Bonifacio High Street - Central Square so we could have some gelato. After eating some, we eventually booked a ride home. The driver we had for tonight talked about the California wildfires and he said that it happened because the people of California don't believe in God or something, which honestly pissed me off. My Mom and sister didn't mind the question and I was too stunned by his response to actually retort/clap back at him because I honestly hate religious losers who blame misfortune on innocent people affected by natural disasters, and that "they deserve it." It was honestly disgusting to hear and I just didn't mind him and my Mom and sister just talked amongst themselves for the rest of the car ride home.

Song of the day: The Lucky One (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift

Lyrics that resonated with me:
New to town with a made-up name
In the angel's city, chasin' fortune and fame
And the camera flashes make it look like a dream
You had it figured out since you were in school
Everybody loves pretty, everybody loves cool
So overnight, you look like a '60s queen

Another name goes up in lights
Like diamonds in the sky

And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one
Yeah, they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one
But can you tell me now, you're the lucky one?
Oh, oh, oh

It Has Been 5 Years and 8 Months

Tue, 14 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today was a really heavy day. Today was the day I decided to submit my resignation from this company after 5 years and 8 months of continuous tenure. I think this is the perfect time to leave the company as I have spent 20% of my entire life here. I started when I was 20 years old and I'm now 25, I have seen trends come and go, and I've ushered in changes that affect the company at a critical infrastructure level. I have imparted a lot of my knowledge and skills here and I believe this is really the time to see where my career in DevOps takes me. After I submitted my resignation, my superior acknowledged it and understood where I was coming from. There was no resistance to me leaving and my other colleagues who had also been here for 5 years were shocked at me leaving, but they also wished me well. Max and Meryll also caught up with me during my lunch break and Max asked me when I was resigning, and I funnily replied to Max that I had just resigned a few minutes ago, which was the truth. We all caught up and I share with them a bit about my next steps. After that, I went back to work and continued doing my daily tasks as usual. The day ended and my night was pretty chill, although there was this looming feeling that I had to step up and prove myself again this year, but it was all well and good.

Song of the day: Midnight Fiction by ILLIT

Journal entry for Monday, January 13th, 2025

Mon, 13 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Above Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Song of the day: Accidentally In Love by Counting Crows

"In Love" and in the Mountains

Sun, 12 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Today was weird and sorta funny. I woke up early at around 6 a.m. to prepare for our excursion today to some places in Tanay, Rizal. I was wondering which outfit to pick, it was either the Squid Games Play 069 full-on cosplay I had, or the black running jacket and jogging pants my mom recently got me. I was cautious about choosing the Squid Game one because I honestly look kind of fat in it and I didn't want to fully wear it without losing some weight. But regardless, I wore it and chose that as my outfit. My sister's boyfriend arrives to pick us up and my sister sits beside him in the passenger seat. We waited for a bit for my sister's boyfriend's dad (that was a hard one to put in English) to come pick up the wallet he left in the car and we eventually took off after that. The whole ride there, I was mostly playing songs from my Upbeat Mix on Spotify. We passed by some areas I know like Eastwood and we continued heading up north. Eventually, we reach Rizal province and I stumble across an old song I like titled, "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)." It was such a cute song and I imagined myself being in love again. While I wasn't in love with anyone in particular, one girl came up and she was a friend I talk to every now and then. I just imagined how cute and fun being in love was and I imagined myself living life like I was in a musical with that song playing. It was such a beautiful feeling and I really asked myself to make the path I'm on lead to love like that in the future. We stopped by a Shell to take some pictures and use the restroom and a few people noticed me because I was wearing a Squid Game outfit. We took a few pictures and continued on our way. I was still playing the same song while on the way there. We reached Caza Peregrine Resort & Restaurant shortly afterward and there was absolutely no Internet there and no cell signal at all. We parked the car at a house nearby and went on a steep downhill path. We were only there to take a few pictures and a lot of people were absolutely looking at me. I could feel people looking at me because I wore an accurate Squid Game outfit. While I didn't mind the attention, I felt a bit fat in my outfit and it was a valid feeling because I was way thinner when I purchased this outfit. I should really lose a lot of weight this year. I did appreciate that a lot of people were noticing me, though. After taking pictures, we eventually walked back up the hill and it was such a hell to go through. When we reached the top, I was extremely out of breath and my legs had hurt. I stood for a while and people around me were noticing my Squid Games outfit. A few people kept pointing and looking at me, which was kind of fun but also a little awkward. Some kids were impressed at my outfit, though, and they pointed at me, too. Our next stop was a place nearby that offers an ATV ride through the forest. My Mom decided against it since it seemed sketchy and didn't have photos, also the trail seemed boring according to them. We eventually left but the lady in the shop was scared since she just saw the ending of Squid Games Season 2, which I found funny. We then drove uphill to a location that my sister and her boyfriend had been to before and that it was a great location. It was Ridges and Clouds Nature Camp which had us go uphill and I slept while on the car ride there. We also passed by a famous spot for motorists to go downhill on. We eventually got there and a few people noticed my Squid Games outfit, one guy even said that there was already a "part 2" available, which made me laugh inside a bit. There wasn't much to do but we ordered some food and took a few pictures. I also got salted caramel coffee and Bicol Express while the others ordered tocino, blueberry juice drinks, bulalo, and other things. We took a few photos of the Sierra Madre mountains nearby and we appreciate the view. Nothing much happened there aside from us finishing our food and taking more pictures of the area. My Mom sat at a swinging chair which seemed dangerous and she was so scared because I joked that I would push them on it. We took a few more pictures after that but eventually went home. The trip home was nothing noteworthy. Some of us just rested and I looked outside the window while playing music on my Galaxy Buds. We eventually reached home safely and a few kids in my village looked at me because of my Squid Games outfit. We do a few chores and do some cleaning up, and the rest of the day passed just fine.

Song of the day: Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes) by Edison Lighthouse

Lyrics that resonated with me:
She ain't got no money
Her clothes are kinda funny
Her hair is kinda wild and free
Oh, but love grows
Where my Rosemary goes
And nobody knows like me

She talks kinda lazy
And people say she's crazy
And her life's a mystery
Oh, but love grows
Where my Rosemary goes
And nobody knows like me

Journal entry for Saturday, January 11th, 2025

Sat, 11 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

I couldn't sleep properly today and I was a bit stressed out by my Mom's comments about my weight. Also I was really hungry, so I decided to order some food from Grab like I used to and got myself food from McDonald's. My Mom eventually wakes up and sees what I'm eating but she just lets me. I watch Horror Mine and I watch a new episode of a movie he's actually reviewed in the past. I couldn't finish the food so I just set it aside and I was able to go to sleep afterward. When I woke up, I noticed that my cousins were upstairs and they were helping us clear out Lola's room. It was just filled with stuff and old things, some of which we threw away and some we kept. We found old photo albums and I actually found the other pieces of my Squid Game outfits. I knew they were here but I was just too scared to check this room because I was afraid that I might stumble upon a rats nest or a cockroach nest. My cousins do pull out mice glue traps that my sister laid down before and they also uncover some dead mice carcasses that Milktea probably killed. We cleared out the entire room and we didn't see a single living mouse or cockroach, which was honestly the most surprising thing for me because I thought that pests made this room their home, but apparently not. I helped clean and polish the floor of my Lola's room once all of the stuff had been taken out. We cleaned out all of the drawers of my Lola's old cabinet and repurposed it by making it out current cabinet. We also place moth balls to keep out cockroaches. By the time lunch came around, my Mom insisted that we order Jollibee and I ordered 2 buckets of chicken for my cousins and other family members to eat. One of my cousins had his girlfriend and son come and they also ate some food. After that, we continued to clean up and renovate the room as we were going to use the room to store all of our clothes. I also moved my dresser from my room to Lola's room and my room felt much bigger than before. I also wipe off some of the remaining dust on the wall where my dresser used to be. After doing all that, setting up some clothing racks, and placing all of our items inside the newly repurposed room, we were all done. We ordered Pizza Hut for dinner and our cousins as well as our other family members ate pizza with us. Some of us watched season 2 of Squid Games and I watched along with them despite already watching the show twice already. We eventually finished it and I helped clean some of the plates and clean up for the rest of the evening. It was a nice day to spend with my family, all things considered, and I also found some of my old, treasured shirts I used to wear in high school.

Journal entry for Friday, January 10th, 2025

Fri, 10 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Below Average

I was sick today and I spent most of the day just sleeping and getting my health back. In the afternoon, my Mom decided that today would be the day she cleaned my room and she helps clean my room and my sister tags in to help. They clean the bulk of the room and I help out a bit by removing some stuff from the shelf and wiping some dust off the walls. I try not to exert that much effort because I just got sick and I don't want to get again. We eventually finish cleaning my room and I got to rest afterward.

Song of the day: I LUV IT by PSY

Lyrics that resonated with me:
I LUV IT I LUV IT I LUV IT (Oh yes)

Journal entry for Thursday, January 9th, 2025

Thu, 09 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

We had horrible Internet connection throughout the morning. It was so bad, I couldn't do any work and I tried my best to rely on my mobile data, to no avail. After doing some thinking, my Mom, sister, and I decided to go to a coffee shop today and we decided to work outside. We initially had problems with where to go and which cafe is friendly enough to have us stay and work there for noon until the afternoon. Ultimately, my sister decided on Bad Cafe in Makati and we booked a ride there. We initially had trouble finding the cafe in the area, but we eventually found it and got seated. The cafe had a nice atmosphere, it wasn't that crowded but it did have quite a few dogs. Different dogs from different owners fought and got mad at each other, but I didn't notice because I already put on my Galaxy Buds by then. I continue working and getting started on setting up some servers, and I also coordinate with some colleagues on Viber. My Mom got my sister and I some food and I got myself chicken and my Mom also got us a salad. Even though I was already used to working outside, my anxiety was kind of high for some reason and I was extremely worried. I couldn't point out why but it was just that looming feeling. I kept constant watch of my Mom, sister, my belongings, and of the entire area while working. Eventually, my shift ends and I watch a few YouTube videos while waiting for my sister to finish up her work. We went to Uncle John's next door to buy some stuff and I drank some green tea that my Mom had bought before we left the cafe. While walking home, I showed my family the De La Rosa Elevated Walkway I used to always pass by while I worked in KVH at Makati back then. I remember always going here at night after buying some blueberry cheesecake Dewberry biscuits and I would walk down the entire walkway to Greenbelt and then to Park Square. My sister was so shocked to see this long walkway and she's shocked because she has never been here before, despite working in Makati. We eventually reached Glorietta and Mom had her screen protector replaced and we go to SM Makati to buy some groceries and other stuff. I also get a new SM Advantage Card and we finish grocery shopping. We booked a ride home and eventually got home safely. It seemed that my paranoia earlier was all for nothing. For the rest of the evening, I could feel my body burn up and I start to feel sick. It got really bad that I knew I was headed for a fever which I pinned on the Grab driver during our IKEA trip who was coughing like hell. I call in sick for work and try to get some rest. My Mom gives me medicine and gives me a massage with efficascent oil and Salonpas to make me feel better. I do feel better enough after that, thankfully.

Song of the day: Banana Man by Tally Hall

Journal entry for Wednesday, January 8th, 2025

Wed, 08 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing noteworthy happened today lol

Song of the day: Breakeven by The Script

Seeing IKEA

Tue, 07 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

My day started as usual and things at work were fairly calm for today. It just passed by and I didn't have anything noteworthy happen throughout my shift and afternoon. For the evening, my Mom planned that we go to SM Mall of Asia today so we can go to IKEA to buy some stuff. We booked a ride there and, on the way, I imagined myself performing solo at a company's Christmas party, kind of like what I did for my current and past company. Only this time, I would be singing "Beep Beep Beep Ang Sabi Ng Jeep" and making a complete fool of myself, and also bringing handmade props to the performance. It was honestly a fun idea and making a fool out of myself by singing weird songs in front of my coworkers is something I've done twice already, so I found the idea funny. On the way, though, the driver was coughing like hell and he seemed sickly. Eventually, we got to SM MoA and we went to the Watsons inside. We buy some medicine and we take some vitamin supplements before walking to IKEA. We joke and talk to each other on the way there and we eventually reach the entrance. We started at the 4th floor and we walked around some nice set pieces with the furniture and everything set up. We eventually choose and take photos of furniture we want to buy in the future, and we eventually settle on the perfect sofa replacement for our living room. Once that was done, we bought a few things like a new shoe rack and other small stuff like new pillows and a rug. Our bill wasn't much, it was around 3,000-4,000 but we've planned out the other big-ticket items that we want to buy in the future. We booked a ride home and our Grab driver was playing Christian and worship songs throughout the whole ride, which was nice. We get home and the night ends there.

Song of the day: Beep Beep Beep Ang Sabi Ng Jeep by Willie Revillame

Journal entry for Monday, January 6th, 2025

Mon, 06 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Today was pretty okay, I did a lot of catching up in the morning and, suffice to say, I was able to catch up on everything I had planned. Work coasted just fine and my Mom made me coffee for the morning. In the afternoon, I got my weightlifting set and started working out after timing out for work. My evening was nothing eventful as I just watched some tutorials on some DevOps tool and I eventually had to wind down after that. I took Kremil-S before sleeping and that seemed to help because I didn't have any acid attacks in the evening.

Song of the day: IDGAF by Dua Lipa

Journal entry for Sunday, January 5th, 2025

Sun, 05 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special

Today seemed like a normal Sunday for me. In the morning, my Mom and I went out to run a few errands. She had to go to a seamstress to have something fixed and I went to a barber to fully shave my head back to a bald look again. We first checked at a nearby dental clinic if they could squeeze us in for the day, but they were really full and we weren't able to book a schedule. Then I went to the barber to have my haircut. I was supposed to meet up with my Mom by waiting for her, but since my haircut didn't take long, I went looking around for her. I paced back and forth around the area, sat at a seat at the barber shop, and eventually walked around. Eventually, my Mom and uncle saw me and they were looking for me, so that was nice and I got a ride home instead of just walking there (though, I didn't mind walking home). Nothing much happened after that. I got some rest in the afternoon and was even bored for most of it. I was able to watch Venom: The Last Dance (2024), though. For the rest of the evening, I was mostly enjoying. I made a promise to myself that this would change how the next 2 years would go and I danced to party songs. Then I mostly just relaxed and got rest early. I made a note to catch up and upkeep tomorrow a lot.

Song of the day: Danza Kuduro by Don Omar

Journal entry for Saturday, January 4th, 2025

Sat, 04 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Excellent

Saturday was pretty eventful for me, despite getting little sleep. We left the house early to visit Lola's grave and to pay respects to my uncle and Lolo. It was also that uncle's birthday, so that was interesting. We drove there with our other uncle on his tricycle and it was a really noisy ride there. We eventually got there and had no trouble finding their gravestone. We prayed for a bit, took a few pictures, ate some of the *biko*, and gave our offerings to the dead. We went to Vista Mall nearby afterward and we ate at Jollibee because our uncle wanted a burger. I initially covered for their food and my sister tried to get cat food, but to no avail. She then paid me for the cost of the food I ordered. We went home and it took us a while to get home, it was also as noisy going home as the ride there. But we all got home safe and we rested for a bit before going to our massage appointment at 5 p.m. We got ready, booked a ride, and eventually got there on time. While inside, we were escorted to one room for us 3, and thankfully I had a section all to myself and covered with a "towel wall." We got our massages done and I actually fell asleep during it. I know that I was snoring and even snoring loudly, which was both funny and a bit embarrassing for me. Since it was 2 hours, I figured I would naturally pass out because it was a long time. We got our massages done and booked a ride to Greenbelt, but my mom and sister didn't seem to enjoy it much. I told them that my experience was nice enough and they could tell because I actually fell asleep through some parts of it. After our massage, we went to Greenbelt (again) and I had to peel off from them so I could renew my Timezone gold card again, which would take a while. They went to buy a karaoke machine. I eventually got to Timezone and renewed my card, though renewing it was kind of a pain since I had to argue with a staff member there that I had already renewed my card at this location before and that I did have transactions on that card as recent as December. They eventually renewed my card afterward. Since I was still waiting for my Mom and sister, I sang karaoke at Timezone for a while. My mom and sister eventually arrived and we ate at Manam downstairs. The *sisig* was good and we tried their *crispy pata* and *sinigang*. After eating, we went downstairs and to a nearby Starbucks so we could use the restroom. We booked a ride after that and we went home shortly. I bought medicine for my Mom and sister because they both were feeling under the weather.

Song of the day: If I Ain't Got You by Alicia Keys

Journal entry for Friday, January 3rd, 2025

Fri, 03 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Good

My time during work passed by normally, it was just a series of simple tasks and responding to requests. For the evening, my family and I went out to check out Well Being Nature Spa Massage in Makati but we didn't make a reservation or anything. When we got there, I was surprised because I had been in this area before [with Meryll and Max at the Odd Cafe](https://dartegnian.com/calendar/2023/11/03) back in 2023. Since we didn't have a reservation and because they were fully booked for the evening, we just had to schedule for tomorrow and went to Greenbelt. We took a few pictures near the church there and both my sister and Mom prayed for a bit before we went out to eat. Since they didn't want to eat at the Honolulu Cafe again, we went somewhere else. We chose a restaurant nearby, which was Modern Shanghai PH, and they had a big selection of Chinese dishes. We ordered a lot of food and I was able to eat my favorite *hakaw* dish again, and I got to try *xiaolongbao*. Both were really good and they had egg-fried rice, which was perfect when paired with the other dishes we had. It was almost 10 p.m. by the time we left the restaurant and I wanted to go to the Timezone nearby to get my gold card replaced, but my Mom and sister took a while at a perfume store checking out a scent that cost around 19,000 Pesos, which just seemed absurd but understandable. When we got to Timezone, it was already going to close for the day so I wasn't able to renew my card after all. We just booked a ride home and eventually went home afterward.

Song of the day: Jenny by The Click Five

Journal entry for Thursday, January 2nd, 2025

Thu, 02 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Average

Nothing much happened today, we mostly just rested at home and Mom cooked for us. I did my work in the morning and caught up with a few things that happened over the holidays, but it was just my average workload.

Song of the day: Perfect Strangers by Jonas Blue, JP Cooper

New Year's Day

Wed, 01 Jan 2025 12:00:00 GMT

Mood: Special
Significant Location: BGC High Street

New Year's started pretty great. I counted down with my family members on the rooftop (as we've done for the past few years) and I just kept taking photos of everyone. I took a lot of *admittedly good* photos of everyone and my cousins thankfully had AirDrop so I immediately sent them their pics. We all went back to the living room after taking photos and admiring the fireworks. We played games afterward but, initially, only my cousins played. I was too busy trying to get a "karaoke machine" working by using a Bluetooth speaker and my phone, even trying another phone and using an AUX connection instead of Bluetooth, but both attempts were to no avail. My sister also joined it to help. The latency was just bad and we couldn't properly hear our voices, so my sister and I gave up on doing karaoke for the night. I just continued to take videos of our family members playing games and they seemed to really enjoy it, so that was fun to see. I got to join in for *Pinoy Henyo* but all of the items I got were really difficult to guess since they revolved around Filipino actors and actresses, which I honestly don't know much about. After that, I chipped in to add 300 Pesos more (for a total of 500 Pesos) to help fund the next game which was just *Pinoy Henyo* again and it was difficult for me again. I don't mind losing anyway as long as the money goes to someone else. And after that, I just continued eating the Jollibee palabok and *liempo*. I also ate some *leche flan* before eventually going into my room and going on IG to see what my friends were up to. I talked to Naomi for a while and she gave me hints that seem obvious, but I'll hold off on my thoughts for it. I talked to my other friends as well and sent my New Year's greetings. I also wished LK a happy new year, as always. I passed out shortly afterward and I had the **worst** dream about someone. I actually dreamt of seeing them again and, even though it was only a dream, I could feel my heart hurt. I don't remember much but I dreamt of them being involved with another guy while I was on a beach/island with them and it was just a really horrible dream to have. When I woke up, I couldn't believe the dream I had. Even though I really don't care who they get involved with, I guess some part of me still worries and cares. I got up from bed and ate some food for a while. I watched the first two episodes of Squid Game Season 2 with my cousins, aunt, and Mom (who glanced for a bit) and I'm glad they're gripped by the story. Since I've watched the show in its entirety, I just gave out small hints without spoiling everything. Eventually, we all had to leave and go do our own things, with our family preparing to leave for a walk to BGC. When my mom and sister told me that we were going to walk there, they weren't joking. We started our walk from *Libingan ng mga Bayani* to Bonifacio High Street - Central Square, passing by Bayani Road and Venice Grand Canal. It was a record-breaking walk for me, we spent several kilometers just walking and talking while on the way. My Mom was really serious about getting us into shape and they agreed that they would help me buy an Apple Watch today, which was honestly great because I wanted to get it for my birthday. (Of course, I could buy one myself once my next salary arrives, but that was 2 weeks away.) We spent some time inside BGC Central Square, and got some gelato at Venchi. We took a lot of photos and I made a joke about how "gelato" is a word rich people use while we commoners use "ice cream" and it got a laugh out of my sister and my Mom. We then went to Muji upstairs and I got matcha while my sister and Mom browsed around the store. After that, we had to buy my Apple Watch. We stopped by Beyond the Box, which was actually just a servicing/repair center that didn't sell any devices, and then we went to Digital Walker at One Bonifacio High Street. At first, I was having trouble picking which color to choose from. I had 3 options: jet black, silver aluminum, and rose gold. I was initially set on getting the "rose gold" option even though my Mom thought it was too pink and girly, and I just told them that my iPhone is also kind of pink because of the "desert titanium" color. Ultimately, I settled on silver aluminum since it fits well with most of my outfit choices. ### So, yeah, I got it! I got an Apple Watch Series 10! I got the 46mm version, too, which fit well on my wrist. After that, I initially set it up before we ate at Goobne Philippines which was on the same floor. They didn't know what to eat and I suggested Korean fried chicken instead. We ordered this huge plate of Korean chicken with cheese in the middle, but it took a while before we actually got it. In the meantime, I'm exploring my Apple Watch and setting it up (despite the shoddy Internet connection). I also looked at the different TVs in the restaurant and some of them were playing Girls' Generation music videos. I was so happy seeing so many of their MVs playing, and it's actually been a while since I've seen those MVs myself. I pointed those out to my sister and the other table also noticed the Girls' Generation videos playing. I even overhear them talking about a B-side from Girls' Generation. We then got our order and it was served in a bowl that had a big amount of cheese in the middle. I have actually never seen anything like it before and it was pretty impressive seeing the cheese melt in the middle of the pot. Then a server came up and wrapped the melted cheese in front of the chicken for us and it was the most surprising thing I've seen in a restaurant yet, despite all the fancy dinners and meals I've had before. I don't think I ever had a server prepare my food tableside before, so that was another first as well. My sister loved the chicken and, while I... not so much. I actually surprised my Mom because she thought that I didn't like it, even though I think I like it. What shocked me the most was that I barely had anything all day and even walked several kilometers just to not feel hungry. Maybe it was the gelato earlier or the overabundance of food from the night before, but my appetite was not there. We ordered the rest for take-out and then left One Bonifacio. We stayed at the Kuube bench for a while and I got to play some songs. We booked a ride home and everything ended well. I was able to use a Ben 10 Omnitrix picture as my watch face, same as my old Samsung one, and I felt really good and excited to fully set up my Apple Watch when we arrived home. That wrapped up my New Year's Day.

Song of the day: Perfect Strangers by Jonas Blue, JP Cooper