Feb 8, 2024

I didn't really feel 100% today. There were some parts of me that were still in shambles from yesterday. Even during work, I was crying in the background and I was still very much hurt. But I was able to get through today and have fun for a reasonable chunk of it. In the morning, nothing was unusual and I finished my morning tasks as always. I got to join my friends in a call and play Phasmophobia with them for 2 rounds during my lunch break, then they told me that they give up on Phasmo and said that it was boring haha. Then we just watched horror or scary thing on YouTube. I heard something really bad. So it really ticked me off for a good chunk of the day. In my frustration, I was playing XG's "LEFT RIGHT" in the background and banging a dead lightbulb on my table. I smacked it so much that it broke, scattering shards of glass on my table. Thankfully, I cleaned it up and the only time I got hurt was when I was pricked from a shard of glass I didn't see. One of my supervisors at work did tell me that they clearly see the frustration I have with my work tasks and they heard me when I communicated to them that my tasks weren't up to par with what I want to do with my career. Thankfully, they're making adjustments on their side and they're going to put me into more DevOps tasks soon, which relieved me. In the evening, I was still in a call with someone and we watched episode 1 of Universe Ticket. Then we left the call for the night. I was playfully talking to some girl online for the evening and I honestly wasn't sure if I was flirting or not. I think I wasn't. But I tried to find more people in the evening because I was still very much frustrated. I'm not sure where this goes and I don't intend on it progressing, but we'll see.