Mar 8, 2026

I decided that I'm unsure about my feelings for Mon because it all seems “too good to be true.” I've been here before, and there's always a “catch” to these. So I'm holding out and keeping my feelings at a distance rather than just blatantly saying/admitting it after a hangout that went so well.

For today, I had a hangout planned with Max and Meryll. I talked to Mon for a bit throughout the day and up until I had left. I booked a ride to Ayala Malls Circuit because that's where I thought we'd go. But I found out that it was just near it, and that it actually wasn't there. It was actually somewhere else. So I spent 15 minutes walking to The 210 Weekend Club and I eventually got there and saw Max and Meryll talking to each other. I ordered some stuff and then made friendship bracelets, and I could only give one to Max because of time constraints.

We then planned to go to Ayala Triangle and I booked us a Grab ride to there because it didn't cost much anyway. I told them a bit of how I sold a Google Pixel 9 for only 1K Pesos and I heard some stories from Max. After we arrived, we walked around to find a suitable place to sit on and we just talked for a bit. It was this time when a topic was opened up that absolutely shocked me.

At that moment, I was kind of left speechless but also kind of sad. I did apologize and mostly listened, and I didn't really defend myself much. When I was asked if I had any issues, I said I had none, which was true anyway. But part of me felt a little pained because this was kind of the last friend group I have. Like they were the only group of people I felt like I could tell stuff to, and especially since we've lasted since our days at Dice.

It sucks to hear that even this friend group will die out on me, and I kind of cried at the thought of it when I was looking at a palm tree. We walked to Glorietta and talked, and I tried my best to feel and be engaged even though I was ruminating in my thoughts. When we arrived and went to the bathroom, I had some time to myself to just cry because I've had so many friendships collapse over the years, and I could just tell that this one is also done for. But I didn't let them know and I just said that my eyes were irritated, which is why it was watery.

We went up to the Top of the Glo and just talked, chilled there, but I was mostly just disassociating and passively listening. We eventually ate at Saladstop for dinner and my mood had shifted, but I was still just listening to them and I listened to Max share her relationship experiences. We went home after that and I just ruminated in my thoughts for a while.